Chapter 23

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Nathans POV

FOR ONCE IT'S NOT THAT MUCH OF A CLIFFHANGER!!!!!

"don't get mad, but...I kissed siva." she whispered, instantly rage shot through me. Someone else had kissed my girl!!!! I had one thought, they were going to die. "no, Nathan, please dont get mad, I can see it in your eyes, please, let me explain." she begged. "no." I growled and started to push her out of the say so I could go pound sivas face in.

She rolled on top of me and straddling me, she grabbed my wrists and pinned them to the couch by my head and her face was an inch from mine. I couldnt help but to get turned on, this was hot as hell. "Nathan listen, he was cleaning out my cut and we were talking about you, I said that I'd never kissed anyone and had it feel as right and amazing as when I kissed you. I'd never had a kiss feel nice before, I'd never wanted to kiss someone before." she started.

"and then siva said 'well, maybe you need to kiss someone else and see.' and I leaned in and kissed him." she finished. "don't be mad, I pulled back immediately, it didn't feel right Nathan. When I kiss you, it feels perfect, when I kissed siva, it felt wrong, please dont be mad." she whispered, and I watched as she was searching my eyes, looking, trying to figure out how I would react.

"it feels perfect when I kiss you?" I asked, she smiled and nodded. "it does." she said. "I love kissing you, as long as I'm not afraid, I love to touch you and to kiss you and to feel you all over, i love it." she said, again, I couldn't help it, I got a hard on and I gritted my teeth. Cold showers, naked old people, cold water, cactus, god I was just trying to think of stuff to make it go away.

"it is nice." she said and lightly trailed her hands from my wrists down my arms to my chest and she started playing with the button on my shirt, oh shit, oh shit this was bad. "Ellen." I said, maybe i could go a little farther with her, maybe she'd be ok.

"Ellen." I repeated and she looked at me, my heart sunk, no, I couldn't. Her eyes were full of fear and her hands were shaking. "Ellen stop." I said. "but don't you want me to d.." she started and I shook my head. "no, you're clearly terrified." I said disappointed. "you're disappointed." she sobbed.

I sighed. "yes, honestly I am a little disappointed, I really want to show you how great I can make you feel, I want to kiss you and touch you and do everything to you, but only if you're not afraid. Because I can live without all that as long as you're happy and unafraid." I said, she looked at me. "really?" she asked, I nodded.

The bus stopped and ellen and I both turned and looked as the boys came over with the whole crew. They looked at us, me laying on the couch, her straddle me and messing with my shirt buttons and stopped. "did we interrupt something mate?" asked max, I shook my head. "no." I said. "come on Ellen, let's go inside." I said, she shook her head.

"I don't want to move." she said and I smiled. "come on, we can cuddle later." I said, she sighed but stood up and I got up after her. Thank the fucking lord for jeans so I can hide my boner. We all walked off and went into the place we're having the concert at.

The crew went and set up while the guys were doing a sound check and I finally saw Maggie and jay join us. "finally mate, where have you been?" asks siva. "sucking face!" shouted Tom and he and max started rubbing their thighs. Maggie blushed and jay just laughed.

"Ellen how are you?" asked maggie as she waked over to us, Ellen shrugged. "fine I guess." she answered. Maggie leaned into hug her and I felt her stiffen as Maggie wrapped her arms around her. "it'll be alright Ellen." said Maggie when she pulled back. As soon as Maggie let her go Ellen leaned into me and instantly relaxed.

I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her into me lightly, careful to keep her stomach and chest from touching anything. "you alright?" I asked, she sighed and nodded slowly. "alright, I've got to go do sound check, where do you want to be?" I asked. "here." she replied. "I'll go sit where the audience will sit, because it's empty now." she said and I'm pretty sure she said the last bit for her own benefit.

"sure, go ahead." I said and kissed her head, then she walked away and off the stage. She laid down on the ground and I smiled as I looked at her. We started sound check and when I had to sing I'm Not The One ellens head shot up and she looked at me.

"I sing it every show love." I said with a smile. "because I love you." I said. "You're way to young, to be broken... you're way to young to fall apart..." I started singing and Ellen just stared up at me as I sang to her. When I was done she was bawling and I jumped off the stage and knelt down in front of her

I didn't say anything, I just sat there, kneeling in front of her and watching her. The boys started on the next song as we both just sat there. "Nathan..." she whispered. "I....I love you." she said, I smiled and nodded.

"and I love you." I replied and then looked at the boys, it was my turn to sing in a second. "I promise, after the show we can go cuddle." I said, then kissed her head and stood up. I started singing and got to the stage. We finished the sound check and I escorted Ellen back to the bus.

She sat on my bed and I stood in front of her. "you alright?" I asked, she nodded and i put my hands on her legs. "the cut on your stomach, was it because of me?" I asked, she sighed and I saw the happiness leave her eyes. "yes." she admitted. "why?" I replied. "because I was hopeless without you." she said. "Ellen, you can't do that again, understand? Ever, do you understand how worried I was?" I growled.

"I'm sorry I just, I can't promise that." she said. "Ellen you have to promise me." I growled and grabbed her shoulders. "I don't know what I'd do it I lost you, promise me you'll never hurt yourself again." I ordered,she just looked at me, terrified. "let me go." she whispered, I shook my head. "no, I'm not letting you go until your promise me you'll never hurt yourself again." she just looked down.

"look at me!" I shouted, she slowly looked up and she looked like she was about to cry. "promise. Me. Now." I hissed. "I...I can't...don't make me do this, please sir." she sobbed, I let her go. "I'm sorry Ellen." I said and I instantly felt horrible for making her cry. "sh, baby, sh, I'm sorry." I said, she just gave me a sad look and shook her head. "go." she ordered. "Ellen..." I started. "go! She shouted and pointed to the door, then rolled over under the blanket. Oh fuck, no. "I'm sorry." I whispered, then walked out.

We did the show which was then we got backstage and showered and changed. We went back to the bus after we met with fans and I yawned and laid down on the couch, knowing Ellen wouldn't want to forgive me, she wouldn't want to see me.

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See it's not a cliffhanger, just sad, so, you liking it? You looking it? You liking it?

Anyway, I'm with Maggie right now and she's TERRIFIED of clowns, so we're watching the movie 'IT' and it's really funny cause she screams and freaks out every time she sees the clown, LOL

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