sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛ ᴀᴅᴍɪʀᴇʀ

27

"It's Friday Friday gotta get-" Johnny sings off tune again.

"Johnny shut up-"

"You love it don't lie."

"No I don't-"

"Why you lying, why you always lying-"

"John I'm-"

He puts his hands up as he shushes me.

"It's fine I know kenz."

"What-"

"I know you love me, I know you care, just shout whenever-"

He looks at me expectantly. I ignore him and he frowns as he continues. "WHENEVER!"

"And I'll be there!"

"Dude that's horrible," Carson exclaims, sliding next to Johnny and banging his lunch tray on the poor table. Darius lets out a loud snicker while William just walks behind them quietly.

Johnny rolls his eyes and offers me a slice of cafeteria pizza.

"Aweee look Johnny is feeding his girl!" Carson exclaims excitedly.

"I'm not his girl."

"You're his life I know."

Johnny whispers "ignore them" so I do. I look concerned a the pizza then my anonymous letters reminded me that I didn't need to be a stick to be pretty. Johnny gives me a warm smile and a thumbs up too.

I take a big bite out of the pizza while Johnny grins foolishly.

"Aren't they cute?" Darius whispers wistfully. Carson squeals in a high pitched voice.

"They are definitely my favourite couple." He whispers to William in a loud tone. I blush and Johnny blushes too.

"We're not together, were best friends-" he clarifies and for some dumb reason I frown.

"So you're saying y'all don't like each other?" Carson asks as he peers at us both closely.

"I-i-....." Johnny stutters nervously. I don't even trust myself to speak. Carson rolls his eyes at Johnny.

"You're such a loser John. What about you kenzie? Do you like him?"

Yes a lot. Even when I shouldn't.

"Oh uh-"

To my relief, the spotlight is taken off me when a sudden happening takes place at the centre on the cafeteria.

It's  Diego on one knee with a bunch of flowers and chocolates.

"Lily will you go to prom with me?"

The whole cafeteria stops breathing at once. The popular girl looks down and  fans herself excitedly with her hands. "Yes yes yes." She squeals.

I hear a loud stab of the fork and I see a moody William. He stabs at his mash potatoes, a sour look on his face.
That's when I realise he's probably jealous. Familiar huh.

I give him a comforting smile but even level headed, calm, cool and sweetheart William ignores me. I flush with embarrassment and look down at my half eaten food while he unsuccessfully tries to scoop his potatoes with a fork.

Carson sneaks a look over to William and decides to do the most stupid thing ever. He stands up suddenly and walks to the next table. He stands up on the table and everyone gasps.

"Brynn will you marry me?" He hollered. "I meant will you go to prom with me?" He asks even louder. Brynn looks at him with an unrecognisable look on her face.

Before we know it, carson is drenched in some weird substance as she sashays away.

There whole cafeteria erupts in cheers.

Carson just grins as he slinks back to our table and sits down next to me. "That was awesome right?" Darius burst into laughter, Johnny winced while William still had the sour look on his face.

Carson frowned. "Will, I got freaking drenched for ya, it would be appreciated if you smiled you know?" I smile to myself. They might all be popular and jerks, but they genuinely cared for their friends.

Carson's frown turned into a wicked smile. "Darius why don't you go next?"

          ________________________

"MISS TURNER!" Mrs C's annoying voice shouts out again. I'm just glad that for once she isn't shouting Johnny's name.

"What?" Nadia asks while inspecting her nails. "It wouldn't hurt to pay attention!" Mrs C says once again.

Nadia flicks her hair and rolls her eyes' "Yes I know its almost summer hols and it's prom later tonight but this is pure discrimination!"

Mrs C continued to rant about how prom was a waste of time and I pictured myself strangling her. Why was it that everyone is going except me? Why is it that I finally got asked to prom by the only person I really wanted but I turned him down?

Why am I so stupid?

Soon even class ended but I was still wondering why someone as stupid as me exists. I should never have let my insecurities get the hold on me. With frustration, I stomp to my locker while Johnny trails behind. I rip of the note without even sparing it a glance.

Johnny coughs politely. "Are you okay?"

I shrug nonchalantly. "I just want to go home." He nods in confusion. "Okay."

We walk awkwardly. Carson waves to us. "Stop being a wimp John!"

John ignores him and we continue our walk back home. We arrive home and to my surprise he doesn't go to his house.

"John your house is next door."

"I already told you, I'm not going home yet."

I blink in confusion. The whole walk back home I've been regretting my decisions I haven't even paid attention to his words.

"Why?" I finally find my keys and unlock the door, letting ourselves in.

"I don't want to be at home." He says while trudging up the stairs like it's his house.

"Why?" I ask again.

He opens my bedroom door like it's his own room, again. "Lauren and Nadia are getting ready for prom."

I suddenly realise that while we're here doing nothing, other people must be getting ready for it.

The sinking feeling fills my stomach again I swallow again. "Netflix?"

"Okay."

We watch Netflix but I can tell both of us aren't that into it.

He receives a message. He gets a glance and then throws his phone away. A few minutes later, I receive a call.

"Kenzie?"

"Yeah who's this?"

"Carson and the gang gang!"

"What?"

"Force Johnny to come to prom we're bored as duck!"

"Uh-"

I end the call quickly. I'm starting to feel super guilty. I'm so selfish. So I'm not going. That doesn't mean Johnny shouldn't be able to go.

"Johnny you should go your friends are calling I'm feeling guilty, just go and I'll stay at home okay-"

"We promised each other we wouldn't go if one of us didn't go."

"The first time we made that rule we were in 3rd grade."

"So-?"

"You're not going?"

"Not unless you are." He says firmly.

The phone rings again. I ignore it and soon, Maddie appears with the house phone in her hands.

"Kenz, there's a call for you-"

I give out an exasperated exclamation, Johnny's eyes on me, Maddies curious expression aren't helping either.

"Fine! I'll go to prom!"