sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛ ᴀᴅᴍɪʀᴇʀ

05

After the supposed 'date' that wasn't a date, we headed home and called it a day. I go back to my home while he goes back to his.

"So what did you and Johnny together today?" Maddie asked at dinner.

"No talking at the dinner table!" Dad  said angrily. We all flinch.

"I'm sorry." She mumbles.

"I'm done. I have stuff to do I'm leaving early." He said madly.

With that, he leaves the table and his half finished plate not even bothering to put the dish in the sink. Mom gives a worried look but doesn't say anything. It's always been like that anyways. I hear the door slam in the distance and the car engine rearing up. He's gone.

Maddie blinks twice then continues with her dinner like nothing happened. "So what happened dear?" My mom asked. "Nothing much. We went and hung out with Nadia and her old friend."

"That's great." My mum mumbled.

"Uhm yeah it was great." I let out the 'date' part intentionally. I really didn't need my mom questioning me. A long silence stretched at the table.

"I'll clean the dishes." Maddie offers even though it's my turn. I open my mouth to tell her but she nods her head, and waves her hands telling me to shoo.

She can be annoying but I admit, she's the best sister ever. The most annoying best sister but oh well.

As I pass the living room I see mom sitting at the couch with a worried expression on her face. I sigh to myself. She deserves so much more. I open my mouth to say something but nothing comes out. In the end I just settle for "good night."

As I walk up to my room I wonder what's Johnny is doing. I instantly feel better in my room. It's the only place that calms me in the whole house. The only place that ain't out of control.

I plop on my bed and do nothing. I take out my phone and start watching Shawnmila videos. However, my hands keep hovering above Instagram. I really wanted to text him but I felt too clingy so I let it go.

After a few hours of reading and studying and watching random YouTube recommendations, it's 11pm. I can't help myself as I draw open my curtains to see if Johnny's bedroom light is still on.

I have a weird obsession with numbers. I only sleep at certain times. If I planned to sleep at 11 but was a late by a minute, I'd refuse to sleep and wait until 11:30pm.

Fine I admit. Yes I'm a perfectionist.

Johnny isn't as scheduled as me but I know he usually sleeps between 11:15-11.30

To my surprise, his light is still on even though his curtains are drawn. He's rarely ever missed his time.

I see my reflection in the window and saw my ugly pimples. I instantly felt like climbing in bed. Get pimples just for being a creepy stalker? No thanks.

I try to sleep but I can't. In the end I give up as I go over to the window again. I should have just texted him but we already spent a whole day together. What is wrong with me?

He finally closes his light as 11:40pm.  Even through he's a little late, he's still predictable.

I smile for some weird reason. Him being predictable made me feel safe. It made me feel like I had grasp on life.

A/n
Just some background story and characters characteristics I guess. I'm like Kenz. If Its 10:31pm, I'll just gave to wait till 10:45 or 11. Weird I know. Also this book is flopping and that's fun I guess