Turning point

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"Its not what youre thinking" i exclaimed, i cant help but to raise my voice. I felt too uneasy to hover on the couch. I stood up and stepped a little nearer to my manager. He looked at me like im a defendant on a interogation room. I can see that he is abit enraged but Im not afraid. I crossed my arms and impatiently tap my foot as Im scrutenizing his expression. He streched his arms to me and on his hands were pictures.

"Then help me understand, what are this photos about?" He said glaring at me. I took a deep breath and took the pictures off his hands. I scanned through every pictures and realized what they were really about.

"That night, we had dinner after the baeksang arts award.." I explained with my restless voice. I felt nervous while i was staring at them. It was that night. The night when I decided to be true to what Im feeling. That beautiful night when everything was perfectly fine. The night that im saving on my mind. The most beautiful memories in my life happened after that starry night.

"You had dinner? Just the two of you? In a bar?" He asked raising his voice.

I nodded and bowed my head like a kid being scolded.

"Then how about hugging each other beside his parked car underneath the sky?" He continued almost yelling. Its irritating but he is right, i should have been really careful. That paparazzi is really lucky or i should say he or she is too cunning. How can he be that great and captured that very brief moment. I sighed.

"Sorry" i said in a low voice.

"Tell me whats going on.." He commanded. "Are you dating kim soo hyun?"he continued. His eyes were fierce.

"Im not sure.." I replied unenergetically.

"What does that suppose to mean? If youre not married, dating soo hyun is a really good idea but we both know what is reality." He said running his fingers through his hair harshly.

"Im having a divorce..and it wasnt a marriage you all think it was. I never really had a relationship with anyone." I explained. I dont know what to think of anymore. I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself.

"The whole world know that you are happily married, so what do you want us to do with this issue?" He said with his arms crossed resting on his chest.

"Do what youre supposed to do..

Sue that person if thats what going to stop him" i said.

"Are you out of your mind? You cant just sue a paparazzi. Its his job to take photos that you would not like the media to see" he said.

"Then what am I supposed to do?" I asked glaring at him.

"Stop seeing soo hyun, its the best for both of you. Put this to an end while its still not too late. Ill try to settle this photos so that guy would not sell this to reporters. Im begging you, do this for your career and for all of us"

Im begging you.

Do this for your career

For all of us

His last words were piercing me. There is so much going on in my head at the moment. I never thought it will be this soon. I understand that time will come for us to face the reality. Our love for each other is not a bed of roses. It comes with dreadful thorns. And it wasnt as if we dont know it will be hard, but we never saw this coming. What am i going to do now, I sighed in frustation. My hands clasped over the table and I feel my feet trembling. Should I call him now? I thought. I shook my head and stood up to walk to the veranda. I took three consecutive heavy breaths. My heart feels bloated, like it could burst any moment.

***

"Eounnie, are you biting your nails just now?" lilly uttered. She was staring at me in awe. I looked at her trying to briefly analyze what she was talking about. Alas! I get it. I immediately put down my right hand away from my face. I look at my nails and felt gross.

I was still nervous and cant think of anything that could calm me down. I was trembling that i even victimized my poor nails. Those words kept echoing in my head. I understand my managements point and I trusted them for years. They protected my name for years and their decisions were always for the best. But this time its a little different though. I cant just do what they were asking me to do now. Kim soo hyun ssi, what am I supposed to do with you?

"Are you okay, are you feeling sick?" she said waving his hand right before my wide shut eyes. No Im obviously not okay. Im in an oblivious state, can you help me get out? What am I to do.

"No im fine, im just thinking" i replied plainly.

"About what? Are you tired" she said.

I shook my head and forced a smile. I guess im tired and it was not because of my busy schedule. I sighed in frustration. We have come this far and its such a shame that It caught me off guard.

"Can we go home now?" I asked.

"Yeah eounnie, im done packing our things. Ill call the driver now." She said dialing her phone.

I nodded and said thank you.

Its been three days now. I havent seen him in a while. Saying I missed him is an understatement. I feel suffocated already. Im not sure what to say or how to act if we meet. I wanted to cry and wail about everything. The complications came in again. I thought if I will be true to what Im feeling for him, everything will fall into place. Its like a timed bomb that exploded unexpectedly. I took the risk and i can bluntly say that Im Happy that I did. I never regretted that decision though. It made me happy...for a while.

.......

Trying my best to give you longer chapters loves..

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