The True Bond

Honey & Kiwi

Dedicated to scarlett_mendes. For being a great friend

The sweet smell of honey and kiwi filled my surrounding air as soon as the drink was placed on my table toppled with little small kiwis . The whole setting of brandon's reminds me of cloudy, fluffy things who dance on to songs of troye sivan . Setting my foot here today was quite difficult , I cannot imagine what is going to happen and how I am going to deal with it . I can imagine her sitting beside me , comforting me , telling me to live my life happily but at the same point I can imagine myself sitting next to him , sipping on our individual drinks with a smile on our face discussing which songs suit us the best ..... and this part makes my heart skip a beat . Every time I try to push the thoughts of a messy haired glass wearing boy .... they just come back , circling my mind all the way till the core . I cannot see myself forgetting him , forgetting one of the most beautiful soul that I have see in my life .

The thought of forgetting him is terrifying to me . I may have ruined all the friendship that we both have but I'm not ready to either ruin him or myself. Life hasn't been good to me but I don't want it to affect anyone else . This is the first and last time I'm meeting her , I want her to forget me , to forget that a girl destroyed her brother's life. I don't know his past or his reason to run away from a feeling like love but I don't want to be the person to bring them back ...... if he has locked all of it in a cage then I'm not going to be the key to open it .

The orange drink kept on my table was now glistening with water droplets that made me think of how long it's been . I'm here , sitting like a normal girl who so waiting for someone to come and talk whereas somewhere in my mind , the thought of her not coming is becoming bigger and bigger . I'm looking at the entrance waiting for a girl with raven hairs, slim but for body to walk in and shoot me a smile . My eyes are working in every direction , on the boy standing near the bus stop busy on his phone , on the toddlers playing with their bicycles but everything becomes hazy , it's like time doesn't know if to stop or continue . My eyes shift to the two bodies that have just step down from the arrived bus , it's like the air inside me is punched out by seeing a messy haired glassed boy come on this side with the girl I was waiting for .

It's him .

Looking as fresh as he can . My eyes can't look away, they don't move or blink and when his eyes catch me, I feel like my best nightmare is coming to reality . I watch as she smirks , waves at me , pushes him to the entrance of shop and leave without seeing anything to either of us .

He looks shocked , like he wants to run but his legs are paralysed. As much as I want to talk to him , I mouth him ' you can go ' . If he wants to go then I'm no one to stop . I don't wanna make may other moment of his life bad and I know my presence will just do that .

But he doesn't go , he takes a deep breath , face palmed for once and makes his way towards my table .

He sits down , I feel like running . He calls the waitress , I feel like I will break the glass that I'm holding. He orders the same drink and I feel like dying .

'Hey ', he sets his hands on the table in a crisscross manner and faces downward trying to avoid my gaze on him .

"Hey " , my mind tells me this is of no good but do I ever listen to it?

"I didn't know you will be here ", he shifts slightly making me see that he is forcing himself to do this.

"I didn't know you will be here too " , a part of me did .... a tiny part .

He doesn't answer for a moment . His drink arrives and he starts to sip it . I just sit there with my now empty glass looking at the boy who is my life .

His hands clench and his posture stiffens, I see that he wiped his face once .

"How can you even like me? " , he looks at me now .... finding a lie in my eyes .

"How can someone not like you? " , he fails .... he can't find a lie and I see a tear drip down his face .

" I can't do this ... i can't . I m not made to be loved or to love " , it feels like he is trying to explain it to himself more than me .

"I know .... that's the reason I said you to go . You don't have to go through this " , I don't want him to suffer .... not even a bit .

"I know damn !!! I want to but I can't! I worry too much .... I can't leave you! I know I sound so confused right now cause I am .... I don't know what I am these days . I can't take you out of my mind but I can't be what you want me to be . I have never felt this way , people always left .... before I even got to know them but you didn't. I have suffered a lot because of people leaving me ... I hate them . I can't be one of them . I can't leave you and let you think that it's all your fault! Cause it's not!!! It's the fault of my past and I don't want to separate us . I know I'm not what a person wants but the fact that you still said that you like me made my heart ache ........ I can't loose you ... I can't hurt you but I also can't bring myself to do this " he is a crying mess ..... and I know that I am too .

I thought that he will tell me how ridiculous I am but he didn't . His words are so powerful that now I can't leave even if I want to . I don't wanna be the person who makes him feel bad . ..

"Lets make a bond .... " , I don't know why I am doing this but I am.

"What ? Bond? " , he sniffles a little bit and then looks at me blankly. He looks like a surprised Greek god .

" you don't want to make me suffer and I want my chance . I want a chance to prove myself that I'm good and haven't ruined you so.... let's talk to each other for a month .... confirm that we both are great and then we both can leave each knowing that we did good and that we both are good and happy " , I know this seems point less cause I know he will leave as soon as it's over but I still want to make sure that he is good ... and this is a way to do that .

"Can we do that? " , he keeps his hands on the table and looks at me hopefully ....

"Sure Will , we can do anything that we want. It's our bond, our life ... we don't want to follow the world's rule .... ours are enough " , I firmly place my hand over and give a smile .... he thinks for a moment and then smiles back at me which makes my heart flutter .

"So ..... can we text each other? " , he asks me standing up still holding my hand and paying the bill.

People say that bonds are often better for one and bad for other .... and if this one is bad for one then let that one be me cause I can't see this beautiful person holding my hand sad even a bit .

Hey friends!!
I hope you like this chapter and that it explains why the name of the book is true bond ..... there is loads of fun to come and some heavy parts too so be ready .
Love ,
Monxxxx