Love In A Battlefield

Chapter 20

       The days seemed more numbered now. Suddenly time went faster around me. Matt still sits in front of me and the ring looks at me with a future that seems clear...or should be clear. I can tell the nervous jitters are getting to him from his lack of silence. I can tell that my heart is beating way to much for it to make any sense.

      My voice is hoarse from the lack of speaking "We graduate in two days," I say nearly in a whisper tone. His eyes search mine for an answer that is laying on the surface but to be honest? I don't even know what answer I have in mind. "I love you, I love you more than anything else in this world but marriage?"

        His laugh softens the mood "I know how crazy it sounds, truly I do. I wasn't expecting to give you a promise ring until we were both stable in college, let alone propose to you. I'm not proposing. I'm just...I don't know what to call it." My hands twist and turn. My eyes fixated on the ring on my hands, it looks so perfect. It looks like it belongs there. "I don't know what I'm doing with my life, Quinn, but I do know one thing..." I look up at his eyes "I want to marry you. I want to walk down the aisle and pinch myself while you walk like a Queen in front of everyone that means the most to us.

         "I want to live my life out with you, however many years we might have. I want to see you smile from ear to ear and wear a wedding ring that will always symbolize what we did that day. Now, I don't want to get your pregnant off the bat...no I just want to be with you. I want to live out my days with you by my side." The tears stung my eyes while the promise ring glimmered in the light. I laughed before throwing myself at him, my arms catching around his neck and pulling Matt into a hug.

          I didn't have an answer that was so easy to say. I never dealt with the amount of kindness that filled the room now. I never dealt with this amount of sadness either.
 
          I looked at him and showed my hand "I want the truth. Is this an engagement ring?" He laughed while I giggled like an idiot.

           He shook his head "No, I would never give you something like that for an engagement ring. No, I already have something in mind."

         My brows flicked up "Oh?"

         "One day, I'll propose. Today is not that day. We still have the rest of our lives to be together but that ring makes me calm down enough that I now know that you won't go and break up with me because long distance was too much." I laugh and twist my hand again "Well?" He pushes.

         I kiss his cheek, holding his hand in mine "I promise that I will marry you one day," I say "That was the weirdest thing that I think I'll ever promise anyone." Our chuckle synced together "But I know that you're the only one I'd promise it to."

         Matt grazes his lips over mine "I love you, Quinn Gracelyn Jackson," I laugh at the whole use of my name.

          "As I love you, Matthew Robert Jenkins,"
-                              -

           Later that day I find it more than necessary to start packing up my room for college. I've been putting it off for more than a few months. The boxes are already prepared outside my bedroom door and my mom is helping me decide which things will go to donation and which things will go with me to TWU.

         TWU. Or better known has Texas Women University. I decided to go here in my attempt to become a pediatric nurse, I've always been on the flip side of what I've been wanting to do with my life and maybe that is the type of thing I can say to kids who are like me.

         My mom packs away my desk things first into a donation box except for the many diaries that are locked in the drawer. She pulls out my stuff bear from the hospital when I was twelve "Oh, honey. Look at this...I remember how you loved this bear," I nod my head to agree that I also remember that bear from the first round of sickening treatments.