Love In A Battlefield

Chapter 16

       It was a new feeling. Heartbroken. It was a new feeling that I was sure that wouldn't come as soon as it did, I had no intense heart broken feeling like a girl does when she breaks up with her boyfriend or vice versa, no it doesn't feel like that does. It feels like a sort of relief? I didn't know two things about the dating life and frankly with me just dipping a toe in the pool I knew the water wasn't right. I wasn't designed to date. I was designed to be sick and deal with the outcome of cancer and its many qualities. 

       The daylight is shining through wildly through the blinds of the window, I can hear the birds sing through the empty house and only my steady breathing is echoing through the halls. My fingers flip another page, my mind doesn't comprehend the words of the poetry quite like I imagined it would but it is good enough. The clock chimes three and I jump at the sound of the door bell ringing with a intense knocking banging on the white door. 

       Lynn's silhouette is the only shadow that I see through the window that is centered on the door. I forgot about dress shopping. I put the book down and walk to the door, my dirty sweats surprise her enough that she steps back a few inches, my glasses sliding off my nose make her push them up a few centimeters back to the very top, my light jacket with my noodle arms wrap around my body to shield from the invisible cold. 

       "You forgot didn't you? You forgot about dress shopping!" She whines like a child. I can only invite her in and send my greatest apologies to. 

       I close the door and sit with me knees tucked on the couch "I'm sorry, I didn't remember. The poetry was so intriguing." She scoffs and runs a hand through her black hair. Though she doesn't seem agitated it can be seem through her actions how she is really feeling.

       "You hate poetry! Quinn, tell me what this is all about? You text some crazy text saying that you broke up with him but then I hear from someone down the street that you have a boyfriend? What is going on." Oh. So I am the cause of her sullen mood. I can't lie to her any longer. 

       I have an intake of breath before explaining "Whoever told you I have a boyfriend is correct. Though, I don't know what we are since we've only kissed a handful of times but Lynn..he is amazing. I-I didn't expect for us to be like this but it just-I don't know." Her face still says confusion though I know a list of questions is forming in her head. 

       She stands up and holds up a hand "Okay, so you have another boyfriend. You just broke up with Justin early this morning so...uh..I'm confused. Did you-Quinn, did you cheat?" The accusation never played in my head but I...

       "I think so, I don't know. We kissed when he came to my house drunk as a sailor and the next day he came over and asked me on a date...Lynn he said he felt something there and honestly? I couldn't deny that. So I said yes but only after I had a chance to deal with Justin. He knows everything Lynn, I mean for pete's sake he goes to our school! But-" 

       She interrupted me before I could go on. 

       "But what?! You cheated, Quinn and you had no other person in you head when you were kissing whoever? You didn't think about the outcome? You said you've known him forever and then you just go off and accept a date when you yourself is still a relationship!" I knew that the name that I said would upset her further "Who is he!  I mean at least give me some insight on who can possibly treat you better than Justin!" I dip my head. 

       I get up "No, you have to calm down before I say anything okay? You need to take a breath and realize that it was my choice! It was my decision and as my best friend you are supposed to be happy for me no matter what, I understand that you are angry but you have no right to come in here and yell at me when you asked for the truth! I won't lie to you but I surely won't argue with you about something you instigated." My finger makes attempts to point at her but my anger rises above that point.