unsteady//rye beaumont{OLD VERSION}

fourteen.

its now been almost three months since i left canada and ive been happier. im not going to say im better, because im really not, i can just smile more because of the amazing people in my life now.

im not going to say that vikki isnt amazing and im not happy around her. but shes never understood what im going through and its tough struggling against myself without the support of someone else.

"hey, dani, jack and i are going out for a few hours, brooklyn should be back soon," mikey told me.

jack had been accepted into the band and now lived with us.

i nodded from where i sat on the couch.

i knew mikey was hesatant about leaving me alone, but we both knew brooklyn and andy would be back at noon and they were not the type of people to be late. it was now 11:45.

"see you later," jack waved goodbye before they both left the apartment.

it was nice to finally be alone. with 5 teenagers constantly home and none of them trusting you alone, it was a bit stressful. at least i did get to have showers in peace.

i didnt do much with my free fifteen minutes. i just sat on the couch on my laptop while listening to music. i was looking at my old documents and laughing at how many i made for school but never started.

i ended up starting to write a song. it was a happy song for once and i used my ukulele to give it a good vibe.

(so this is a female version of the lousy truth by nevershoutnever so all rights go to the amazing christofer drew)

boy, I've been thinking a lot
About who we could've been
If I was back home
Just chilling with you and all my friends
But dear I'm gone
And that's the lousy truth
For the past three years
I swear I've been a better girl
Then who I become
I know I know I know I left you down
But I've been gone
For to damn long

thats how far i got before brooklyn and andy showed up.

"youre playing your ukulele!" brooklyn shouted as soon as he walked into the room, not bothering with a hello.

"yes i am," i replied, going to put it away.

"wait no, dont put it away, i wanna hear what you were playing," andy stopped me.

"its not that good," i told him.

"i bet it is," brooklyn disagreed.

"fine, but if i ruin it, im sorry," i said before starting to strum the pattern i just created.

after finishing what i had written, i looked up at them with uncertain eyes.

"that was great!" brooklyn cheered, andy joining.

"what song was that?" andy asked.

"its called the lousy truth,"

"by who?"

"me," i responded, unsure of what they would say.

"why didnt you tell me you write songs? theyre amazing and should be shared," brooklyn questioned, amazed at what i sang to them.

"you never asked," i replied, putting my ukulele away.

"dont put it away," andy said. "i wanna hear more of your songs," he begged.

"i dont have any music for them," i tried getting out of singing in front of people more then i have already.

"thats okay. i bet there still great," brooklyn joined andy in begging.