Heaven Knows OST: ♫ Not Like the Movies by Katy Perry ♫
Chapter 9.5: Anna
(Dominic’s fourth note pasted on Anna’s Diary)
Heaven knows love is just a chance we take
We make plans but then love demands the leap of faith
__________
Dear Diary,
Do you know how to define love? In the most definite way that doesn’t make the world twirl and stops time. People become delusional when they’re in love. For me though, the world didn’t spin around me and time just went on. I just let myself fall in the most un-lady way.
I realize that love is not a concept but a word with no constant and real definition. You cannot describe love; you can only express what you feel. That’s why there’s a word invented we call speechless. Dictionaries serve meanings because it’s their job to make people understand. But dictionaries don’t have beating hearts. They don’t understand what it is like to be in love.
What’s true about love is that you feel it. It happens when your heart starts to beat triple times the ordinary towards someone who is not your relative or your closest friend. But it’s with someone whom you feel the strangest of feelings and the lightest of heart.
I think you can only define love yourself because it speaks the language of your heart. It defines the constant attraction and strong connection you have for someone that the moment they release those three most adoring words, your knees melt with the tempo of your heart and your mind shatters mid-chorus of a beating rhythm inside your head.
It’s only when you learn to let go you know you’ve truly have let yourself fall in love. You can’t stop the fall. Once you slip, it takes all of you. And once you stop it’s like asking your heart to stop beating.
Dominic escorts me home. But this time, I let him take my hand and I let myself savor the warmth of his touch. From time to time I catch his smile. I think he doesn’t worry about his recital anymore. The walk’s usually long for me, but with Dominic now, it seems that time is fleeting. I didn’t realize I was home by then until I saw the light of our front porch. I didn’t want to let him go and that thought had scared me.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.” He says as he plays with my fingers.
I smile. “Okay.” I open the front door and I smell mama’s mushroom soup.
“Anna,” Dominic holds me back and I turn to him, expectantly. “I love you.”
He looks at me just like I look back at him. Expectant.
“Thank you.” I say and his shoulders sag. It fascinates me sometimes how easily I can disappoint people without me wanting too. If Dominic hated my response, I didn’t get to see it because I went straight inside the house.
“Anna?” mama calls from the kitchen.
I stop by the doorway. “Yes, mama?”
She wipes her hands on her apron. “If—if…” she trails off but she composes herself with a long, deep sigh. “Anna, he seems to be a nice boy.”
“He is.” Eventually, he is—for his own good.
She nods slowly. I guess she’s contemplating on her next words. “Anna, you need to be fair with him—”
“I know, mama.”
“You’ll break that boy’s heart.” she says sadly.
I look down at my hands as I lace them together. I can still feel the warmth he left there.
“I always break things.”
I invite myself in and she settles a bowl of soup at the counter. I smile back at my mother in gratitude. I think mothers are entitled to be right. They just know the right words to hit you with the truth.
And love? I think there’s a definition to that word. But it has no words to describe how I feel towards Dominic Savio.
Without Wax,
Anna
(A/N: Dominic’s note was the lyrics to a song called Love Moves in Mysterious Ways by Nina.)
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Heaven Knows
Teen Fiction❝ Sometimes, life gives us a story we've never been told before. And sometimes, it's a story we don't know how to start and a story that we don't want to end. ❞ Dominic Savio is a name you will usually find in a saint's handbook. Overflowed with wha...
