Metamorphosis

Visions and Doubts

Chapter 17

Visions and Doubts

Mira leaned her forehead against the steering wheel of her car, tears flowing wildly down her cheeks.

She had stood in that room waiting for the doctor to come in and… and kill the baby.

She had stood in that room, staring at the posters on the walls, trying to convince herself that this was the right thing to do. There was no way that she could have this kid.

The more she thought about it, the more nervous she became.

"You understand why I'm doing this, right?" she asked while lightly patting her stomach. Closing her eyes, she leaned her head against the wall.

She could see the baby having long blonde hair and Seth's blue green eyes. She could see her son as a ladies man. Maybe her daughter would love romantic movies.

She saw Seth throwing a baseball to a small boy in the park. She saw Christmas morning; a little girl with long brown hair ripping open presents vigorously.

She could see fun visits to Uncle Matt and aunt Marli.

She saw her and Seth's parents holding their first grandchild, their eyes shining with unshed tears and pride.

Then she saw herself giving the child to another couple. A couple who could actually give it those happy memories.

And then it hit her; was she really about to kill an innocent baby because of fear? Did Seth Elsen really have the right to put her in this corner? Did her father's selfishness have to make the baby suffer?

No.

When the doctor had walked into the room, preparing to do the abortion, Mira had stood up and ran past him, screaming that she couldn't do this.

Now she sat in her car sobbing. Placing her hands on the baby bump, she could only find herself whispering 'I'm sorry' over and over again.

Mira sat in her car for nearly an hour and a half before she decided she needed to head home. She really did not want to go back, though.

Her nails dug into her hands around the steering wheel as she remembered that she told Seth about the abortion. Shit, what was she supposed to tell him now?

"Hey, Seth, guess who chickened out?"

Definitely not.

It was time to stop fooling around. On Monday morning, she was telling Seth Elsen that abortion was out and adoption was the way they were going. And if he refused, she was going to lose it.

Because now, he was dealing with a scared, pregnant, pissed off teenager.

Audrey stood outside her daughter's door with a glass of water and bottle of vitamins, knocking firmly. "Mira, you've got to come out of there sometime today. You've been in your room all day!"

"Go away mom!" she heard a muffled voice say. She sighed, getting fed up.

"Mirabelle, open the door and take your vitamins!" she heard a thump, followed by padded footsteps heading toward the door.

"I hate taking these pills!" the teen whined, taking them from her mom and swallowing them with the glass of water.

"I know you do. But pregnant women need to take prenatal vitamins." Audrey took the glass of water as her daughter turned to go back into her room. "By the way, I called my doctor and scheduled an appointment for you." Mira froze.

"An appointment for what exactly?" Audrey shrugged.

"Just a standard appointment. They'll do some tests to make sure that the baby is growing correctly and make sure it's healthy, etc." a small smile tugged at the teens face.

"When did you decide to get this involved?" Audrey paused and smiled back.

"Since I realized that you are going to need some help in this. And if your asshole father doesn't want to help, then I will."

"And since when do we get to refer to him as our 'asshole father'?"

"Baby, going out to that party just rejuvenated me! I realized that life's too short to be upset over a husband. Plus I'm going to be a grandmother soon, so I figured that I need to live life a bit." Mira grinned and embraced her mother tightly.

"I'm so proud of you!" the pregnant girl could feel her heart pounding in her ribcage. Thank God she hadn't had that abortion last night.

"You did what!" Sara screamed. She and Mira were sitting on Sara's bed. Sara's leg was bent in front of her and she was painting her toenails dark purple. Mira was flipping through a magazine.

"Would you mind not screaming?" Paige's voice exclaimed over the speaker phone that sat across from the girls. Paige had stayed out late partying and now had a hangover.

"I was at the clinic. I was there. Two minutes from having an abortion!" Mira said, slapping her hands on her knees.

"What did I say about screaming?" Paige snapped.

"I wasn't screaming."

"Well then talk quieter!"

"What made you change your mind? And why didn't you tell us?"

"I just decided that I couldn't do it. And I didn't tell you because it was something in needed to do alone. Anyway, I'm planning on telling Seth that adoption is our only other option."

"Not the only option left." Paige muttered. Mira crossed her arms.

"I'm not keeping this kid. I just have to find a loving, supportive couple in need of a baby."

"Adoption isn't as easy as it sounds, Miri." Sara said quietly, switching to her other foot.

"Yeah, I figured." She said crisply.

Paige, noticing the edge in her friend's voice, quickly changed the subject. "So, um, how long till you get to find out if it's a boy or girl?"

"I'm not sure yet. My mom's gone all 'Super Mommy' on me and scheduled a ton of doctor's appointments. I have one next weekend."

"Cool. Are you going to ask Seth?" Sara asked as she began painting her fingernails.

"Um, should I?" came her nervous answer. She wondered if he would even give a shit.

"It's your call sweetie." Paige responded with a small groan. "Mom! Do we have any Tylenol?" she called. Sara and Mira exchanged looks and giggled. "Hey! Don't laugh at me! You're pregnant and you're in the school play and 'need to save your voice' so I needed to do enough drinking for the three of us!"

Sara giggled and closed the bottle of nail polish. "Paigey, go lay down. We'll talk later."

"Later." There was a click on the other line.

"When will she learn?" Sara asked, shaking her long curly brown hair. Mira nodded in agreement.

"She needs to be a bit careful though. The last time I drank too much I ended up with this." she pointed toward her stomach. Sara gave her a small smile. "Well, I need to get home. Mom probably wants to discuss some stuff with me."

"Toodles!" Sara said with a small wave. Mira waved back before leaving the room. But then she returned.

"Hey, do you still have the number of that teen pregnancy support group? I figured that I might as well give it a try." Sara grinned

"Yeah."