Bea's To Do List #9: Make sure Noah knows he can't do whatever he wants
"Hey."
"Yes?"
"I don't know if anyone has ever told you this but-"
"Uh oh, here we go. It's lecture time everyone!"
"But you don't get to go around and just flirt with everyone. It causes problems."
"What problems?"
"What?"
"What problems have I been causing with my flirting?"
"Well-"
"You know, things would really be easier for you if you had examples ready when you started to lecture me."
"Oh shut up."
"Also, who am I even flirting with? Has my raw sexual magnetism attracted you without my knowing?"
"Everyone!"
"Everyone?"
"Yes!"
"As in, every person here."
"Yes, that's what I mean."
"Beatrice-"
"Don't call me that."
"Beatrice, that's something called friendliness. I know since you've forgotten how to act like a normal being that's a foreign concept to you, but that's what it is."
"It's more than that and you know it."
"It's really not. But I do know something that makes people blow things out of proportion and act like a crazy person."
"Oh really."
"Really. I'm actually in an expert in this field."
"Great for you."
"Aren't you going to ask me what it is?"
"No."
"Come on, just ask me."
"No."
"Please."
"Nope."
"Aw come on, Bea, just ask!"
"Fine. What is that thing that makes people blow things out of proportion and act like crazy people?"
"One word: jealousy."
"..."
"Ow!"
"What?"
"Don't act all innocent! You just slapped me!"
"No I didn't."
"Yes, you did!"
"Can you prove it?"
"Just look at my face! You can see your hand!"
"So let me get this straight: you are claiming that you were just slapped by a girl half your size and you had no witnesses."
"Well, yeah."
"Yeah, I don't buy it."
"What do you even mean?"
"Bye Noah."
"What just happened?"
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The Stage Manager
Short StoryBeatrice "Bea" Masters has been her theater department's wonderkid ever since she became the stage manager when she was just a freshman. But after the fiasco that was last year's musical (which was not her fault), Bea has been dying for redemption...
