Letter 12 - Trouble

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Dear Harry,

One word to describe what's been happening at the unit. TROUBLE. Especially with me. I promise Harry it wasn't my fault, I tried to ignore them but it was all too much. Liam was going to help me but I was stupid and made a massive mistake. We were playing football Harry, my only other love besides you. It was good, there was me, Liam and Zayn against three other boys called Jon, Dan and Sandy. We were keeping ourselves to ourselves until the worst person on the unit, Alec, came. He started shouting things and kept running through the middle of the game, Zayn asked him to leave but he didn't so I stepped in. My anger got the best of me and I'm sorry Harry. I can't see you. I can't see my mum. I can't even see Liam. They've sectioned me so I'm away from everybody. I can't speak to Zayn or Liam, I'm all alone. It hurts Harry, all I can hear is silence. I want to hear your laugh, it's the one thing that can make me smile no matter what. You giggled all the time at my silly jokes Harry, and now I don't have the courage to say any. I make the other boys laugh but it's not the same, I don't get the same good feeling like I did with you Harry. I've cried every night I've been in here because it's been too quiet. My bed's horrible and cold and I've got no one to hold. They've took away all my posters and pictures and I'm being watched now whilst I'm writing this to make sure I don't do anything stupid. I feel like my privacy is being invaded horribly, I miss you. I do. I'm sorry Harry. I'm sorry I left you and you have to face the world outside on your own. I don't have to face anything, except the pain of missing you. I hope you've gone back to college, you should continue to sing. I love your voice. You should carry on with your singing course, you never know. You might end up as a solo artist or in a band. I'd buy every single album you sold, I'd buy all your merch. I'd be your number one fan. Just like I am now. I'm going to end the letter now because people are staring at me and I feel uncomfortable, like I'm ready to flip out. If I do something stupid I'm sorry Harry, I'm just going to be in more trouble.

Lots of love, Louis xxxx

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