Fixing Love

11

Ethan

I walked out of the house, and saw Carter sitting on the hood of his car, staring at the night sky. I wanted to go to him, but decided to let him have some space.

"I won't yell at you if you try to come close you know." He was still staring at the sky. He seemed to have calmed down now that he was away from everyone. "So, you decided."

"Yes." I was looking at my shoes, trying so hard not to look up at him. If I did, I know I wouldn't be able to talk. Let alone keep myself away from him.

"I can understand you all being mad you know, especially you." I didn't even realize he had walked up to me, until I saw his shoes directly in front of mine. "Ethan." He said my name so quietly, like a whisper. I looked up at him, and saw him smiling sadly at me. His beautiful blue eyes seemed so far away from here.

"Carter, I still love you." He pulled me into a hug, and I loved the way his strong arms felt.

"I love you too Ethan. That's why I can understand your decision." I looked up at him in shock.

"H-how did you?" He didn't let me finish. He simply place a quick, gentle, and tender kiss on my lips. It was a short kiss, but he said a lot in that one small kiss.

"Just know, I am still your husband. If you ever feel you need me, even just to hear my voice, call me." I saw him look behind me, and saw everyone standing there. They all had the same sad look as me. We do love Carter, but we all need time. I guess this reunion was bitter sweet.

"Come on man, we better head out." Freddy gave his shoulder a quick pat as he walked towards the car. I saw Carter stare after him. I wanted to tell him I didn't want him to leave, to have him stay here with me, but I couldn't. We both have things we need to work on. A years worth of problems that need to be fixed. It's gonna take time.

"Good bye." He walked away. He walked away from me again, and like last time, I didn't stop him. He didn't look at us again as he got in the passenger seat this time. They pulled out of the driveway, and they were gone.

"Ethan it's gonna be okay, you'll see. That idiot just needs to get his shit straighten out." I felt Jenny place a hand on my shoulder, but I shrugged it off. Right now, I was angry. I stormed past all of them, and went inside. I locked myself in my room, and screamed. I didn't even care if they heard me. I started punching my wall. Wholes being left behind from my punches. I have never done this before in my life. I have never been this angry in my life.

After a year, I finally see him again. But instead of welcoming him back without a second thought, we interrogate him. I knew it was too good to be true at first. No one can just go back to being normal after being separated for a year.

I plopped down on my bed, and stared at the ceiling. All I could think about, is how he did all of that just to stay away. He gave up being the man I married, just so we could have a fresh start. I was still hurt, but I know he is too. The space isn't because we don't love him, we do. But after everything that was said and done, some time is needed so that everything can fall into place. At least this time, we all have a way to get a hold of him.

My eyes started feeling heavy, and it was getting harder to keep them open. Before I fully passed put, I swear I hear Carter's voice. It sounded like a whisper, but I swear I heard it. "Good night Ethan, I love you."

***********************

The next morning was kind of awkward. Everyone was still here, and we all gathered in the dining room for breakfast. No one said anything, not even Jenny. Mother and Father were trying to eat without looking up. Charles was moving the same piece of meat around his plate, James was simply staring at his food. And Jenny's poor pancake might as well have been scrambled eggs the way it resembled it now.

"Can we please, just address the elephant in the room. This silence is more maddening than the subject itself." I can understand their shock. I'm not normally the one to break the ice. "How long are we going to stay mad?" If it weren't the fact I knew he needed his space still. I would already be in his arms. My husband's arms.

"I don't know, maybe another year." I know she didn't mean to say it out loud, but she did. "Ow! Asshole! Don't kick me!"

"Maybe if you didn't act like a brat! Jenny this has nothing to do with you!" James was glaring daggers at his sister. And not the normal ones they share. This was a look I've never seen him give her.

"Really?" Her voice got really quiet. She stood up, and dropped her napkin. "Nothing to do with me? Who was the one you ran to the night Carter left? Who was the one who held Ethan, day after day, when he felt lost without Ethan? Who helped Charles out when he didn't have it in him to even get out of bed? Or who helped Alastor and Val when they felt responsible for him leaving? I was there to help pick up the pieces for all of you. But what about me? Carter is like my second older brother. Did anyone stop to think how much his leaving hurt me? I've known him all my life, but I put my feelings aside, to help all of you. So yeah, James, this has nothing to do with me." And with that she left. We heard as she slammed the front door on her way out.

"So I guess that's my answer." I feel like a jerk. He is my husband, and I am over the moon that he is back. But just like Jenny said, I'm not the only one hurting. We all dealt with him leaving, so we'll all have to forgive him at our own pace. I just hope it's soon, I just got him back. I will not lose him again. Even if it actually takes another year, I will still wait. I will wait for him, for as long as it takes.