The Clean Up Crew. A Magcon Fanfiction

The Confession

"Is everything okay? You seem different since you left to help your mom.." my voice trailed off as I began talking to him again.

"Um, everything is fine. Don't worry about it," there was a weary tone to his voice. I looked at him for a second as he couldn't look into my eyes. 

"Are you sure Cameron?" I asked in hopes that he would say something else to make me believe that he wasn't lying. He paused for a moment looking down at his shoes, then back up at me. It was as if he was looking through me instead of at me. 

"Yeah," was the one simple word he had to say. There was just one question in my head that wouldn't disappear... does he love me as much as he says he does? "I'll be back I'm gonna go talk to Nash. Just stay here, okay?" he asked as he started heading towards the door. He didn't turn back to look at me.

"Alright," I answered as I sat down on to his bed. Could things get anymore worse than they already are? I mean I got kicked out of my apartment, I have no one here besides my sister, and all of a sudden Cameron and I are falling apart as quickly as we fell together. I put my head on his pillow and closed my eyes thinking about what's happened to me since I moved here. 

Cameron's POV

There's so many thoughts running through my head right now. I just need to talk to someone, anyone, anyone except her. I walked over to the living room and found Nash. He was the closest one I knew I could tell anything to.

"I'm sorry for punching you in the face earlier," I started. I have to apologize before I could say anything else, if not I know he would tell Danielle what I was going to tell him, and that can't happen.

"It's alright," he answered back quietly. I sat down on the couch next to him.

"Look, I have so much going on in my head right now and I need someone to talk to. Can I trust you?" I continued. 

"Yeah man," he finally said as he looked over at me, I could see that he was somewhat worried. It was like he may have known what I was going to say.

"You know how I was helping my mom move in for a few days?" I mentioned, I need to get this off my chest so I can feel better about myself. 

"Yeah..." his voice trailing off, I could tell he was intrigued with what I had to say.

"Uh, never mind I don't think this is a good idea to tell you,"my voice was low. 

"Oh come on, we're best friends you can tell me," he laughed as he slapped my back. As if what I was going to tell him would just come right out.

"I was with Lauren for one of the days I was away," I finally said. 

"But I thought you guys broke up.." I could see he was completely confused by my words. 

"I never ended it. I wanted to in person" I answered back easily. There was just one thing missing from being with Lauren, the sex. She never wanted to have it because she got so worried that she'd get pregnant. So, I got it from the girl I knew would easily give it to me.

"Well, did you end it then?" he asked. 

"I tried to, but she came on to me so strong. It was so sexy," I admitted.

"What about Danielle?" he kept asking questions.

"What about her?" I asked him back.

"Do you even care about her feelings? Or are you just worried about your own?" I heard the words roll off his tongue so easily. I clenched my fist at his words and bit my tongue, refraining myself from punching him. It's not my fault she came on to me so hard.

"I ended it with Lauren after we had sex," I told him. I didn't mean to tell him.

"Wow, because that makes it so much better," he rolled his eyes, and wouldn't look at me.

"It was only one time, its not like its going to happen again..." I tried convincing myself that it was okay. "Besides she didn't even tell me what was going on,"

"How the fuck could that be her fault? She probably didn't want you to know because she was embarrassed,"I could hear him starting to get angry with me. "Do you even love her? Because it just sounds like your possessive over her,"

"I don't even know what love is to be honest," I whispered to myself. I mean, yes I have a ton of feelings for her. Is that really love though? Just having feelings for someone? I don't even know her middle name, or her favorite song how could I be in love with someone I barely know? 

"You don't deserve her," he broke the silence. I tried to hold back the anger I had, but I decided to let it out. I grabbed the collar of his shirt pinching his skin along with it.

"Don't even think about telling her any of this, because I know you'll use this to be with her. Just face it no matter what you do she will never feel the same way about you. Get over it," I said through gritted teeth. 

"Cameron what's going on?" I heard her voice through the hallway then I saw her innocent face. I quickly let go of the collar of his shirt and sat back on the couch.

"Oh nothing, just come and join us," I patted the seat next to me. I can't tell if I really am in love with her or if I'm just infatuated with her. All I know is, is that I feel awful about what happened, maybe that needed to for me to realize if I do love her. I can easily say I love you, but the real question is do I even mean it when I say it? There's one thing I know for sure, is that it will never be the same with how it was before.