My Best Friend's Brother

Bonus Chapter!

Ethan's POV

Sunlight was streaming in through my closed curtains as my eyes were fixed on the wall. Every time I blinked, they hurt. I don't know whether it was from the lack of sleep or...crying.

I loved her. She was leaving. These were the two things that kept playing in my mind as I drove back to my house in the middle of the night.

The memories of last night repeated in my mind. The look on her face when I told her I won't be going over to say goodbye to her, the taste of her lips, the few moments of silence I'd gotten when I told her I loved her, making my heart's pace pick up so quickly in anticipation that maybe she didn't love me back, the relief I felt after she told me she did.

She'd curled up against my chest in that tiny space and closed her eyes. She was asleep in almost no time but sleep was something that I knew I wasn't going to get last night. I made sure to observe every little detail about her face because who knows how long it will be before I get to see her again. The way her eyelashes casted shadows and the way her lips were slightly open as she took steady breaths.

When I was positive she was in a deep sleep, I'd slowly gotten up. Before leaving, I'd removed my jacket and gently placed it on her. Something for her to remember me by, I guess.

I wanted to see one more time but I know that if I did go to say bye to her, it would be too much for me to take. I would lose it, especially if I saw her mom. The woman who was reason Ash was being taken away from me.

This sucks. This sucks so much.

Letting out a frustrated sigh, I sat up on my bed and rubbed my eyes. Getting out of bed, I brushed my teeth and took a long shower. I didn't feel like doing anything. I just wanted to sit and stare into space.

I never really realized when she became such an important part of my life. I never thought that functioning without her around would be difficult. I just felt empty and lost now and I know as dramatic as that is, it was the truth.

Despite wanting to, I made my way down to see mom sitting on the coffee table with a mug and her laptop in front of her. Hearing me near, she looked up and gave me a distorted smile. Great, now she's going to try and make me feel better.

"Hey," she said as I walked to the kitchen. "How are you doing?"

"Okay, I guess," I responded, looking through the fridge. "Is there any breakfast?"

"I could make you scrambled eggs," she offered, removing her glasses.

I nodded, not having the capability in me to talk. Closing the lid of her laptop, she walked over and removed the ingredients while she set a pan on the stove.

"Where's Erica?" I asked, flipping through the newspaper which was lying on the kitchen counter.

She hesitated before saying, "She's gone over to Ashley's."

My eyes flicked up to meet hers. "Oh."

"You're not going to go?" she asked after a moment's awkward silence.

I shook my head as a response.

"Oh," she whispered.

Could this get any more awkward? She was holding back from saying something wrong or saying too much.

She sighed and turned to face me. "I know this is difficult for you, Ethan but that doesn't mean you just entirely avoid her. Do you think this is easy for her? You're just losing her but she's losing you and all her friends. She has to go to a new place and restart. If you go to her right now and give her a goodbye, that'll make her feel so much more better and re-assured. As for you, you're going to regret it later that you didn't go to see her one last time."