Sentimental Reasons

63. Soothing

Draco's POV:

I decided to take a break from all my research about my mission. I didn't want to think about it anymore. My mind couldn't bear it. I knew I had everything prepared. I knew all my research had been done. I knew I had everything to kill Dumbledore, and yet, on any occasion, I found myself looking for mistakes. It was like I wanted to delay it. Deep down, I didn't want to do it. Deep down, I wished my father still looked at me like a boy and didn't tell me to join them. 

Well, I wasn't part of them yet. Actually, I had to fulfil this mission to be part of them. I didn't want to, but my father did. Whatever my father said will go. I didn't have a choice. I had to. 

I walked around the castle corridor, looking for a distraction. I knew most of the students were in their classes, but I couldn't be bothered to go. Unconsciously, I looked around for the one face that eased my mind: Audrey. Colours came back into my life ever since she barged into my room. Everything around me is so much more calmer. My mind isn't pounding anymore.

I looked down at my watch to see it was already three in the afternoon. With everything going on, I couldn't remember which day it was. Everything was going on so fast that I lost track of time every so often.

I looked up to see some first-years gathered at the end of the corridor. Oh, to be eleven again. Oh, to be a boy again. Using my prefect privileges, I walked over to them with assurance. Of course, they were Gryffindors. They didn't seem to notice me standing behind them as their laughter kept filling the corridor. 

Suddenly, a boy sensed my presence and lifted his eyes to meet my cold ones. Without a word leaving my mouth, the boy rushed away, leaving behind his friend—the well-known bravery of Gryffindor. The lone boy's laughter eased down slowly, realising the one he laughed with wasn't here anymore. Carefully, the boy turned around to meet me. As soon as his eyes met mine, terror entered his body. His teeth suddenly chattered. I still love this feeling—the feeling of power over mere children. However, there was still a part of my heart that was bursting from the way I recognised this face. This face that was once mine when I looked at my father. 

I quickly shoved this pain away and enjoyed the feeling of power instead. I was surprised to see the kid still standing there, knowing fully well who I was. I was nearly impressed until, finally, the boy tried to escape me. 

Before he could so much as take a first step away from me, I grabbed him by his disgusting red collar. 

The boy's strength was pathetic, "Where do you think you're going?" I said in a low voice. The boy didn't dare answer my question. Actually, I didn't know if he could with how much his teeth were chattering. I saved his breath and continued, "What day is it?" The boy didn't seem to understand as I saw his eyebrow twitch for a mere second. 

Finally, after looking into my eyes for a few seconds, the boy whispered, "Th-Th-Th-Thursday." I nearly felt bad for the kid. How could he live knowing he was a coward? I rolled my head lightly, realising I had skipped three days of classes. Three days where I didn't see Audrey's face.

As soon as my hand slightly released the grip on the boy's robe, the boy ran away as fast as he could to join his friend who was most probably seeking comfort from stupid Ron Weasley, the Gryffindor prefect. 

Thursday. If I remember correctly, we finished our classes at two o'clock on Thursdays. It was three; this meant Audrey was either in the common room, dorm, or Library. Knowing her, she would most definitely be in the Library, studying for the exams. I couldn't help but smile at the thought of her being the only student in the Library so early in the afternoon.

Audrey's POV:

I was studying Divination in the Library. Studying at this time was the perfect moment. There was no one else in the Library, only me. The librarian was all mine to harass with my questions about where to find books. I could make any noise I wanted, and no one would give a damn. It was at four that students would start sweeping into the Library to get on top of their classes. Luckily, I still had an hour of silence before the students would come barging into the Library. 

Since I was in the Library alone, it was easy to pick up on any noise around me. So, when the Library's doors opened, my head looked up by instinct. My eyebrows furrowed slightly as I saw Draco walking into the Library. Of course, he fixed his eyes on me as soon as he entered. 

The librarian didn't even lift her head to look at who had entered her Library as she was too deep in her book. My eyes didn't leave his as he approached me. He flashed me a smile before pulling the chair in front of mine.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as soon as his hand touched the chair.

"Studying." He said in an intelligent voice. 

"With no books?" I defied him, looking him up and down before he sat on the chair. 

"I don't need books. I already know everything." He answered smartly, but it only made me roll my eyes at his irony. 

"Sit elsewhere. No one's here. You have all the place in the world." I said as I kept looking into his deep grey eyes. 

"Exactly my point." He said with a grin tugging at his lips. I couldn't deny the butterflies fluttering in my stomach as the words left his mouth. 

"I'm studying," I accused, trying to look as composed as possible.

"Me too." He responded, his eyes never leaving mine.

"On what exactly?" I challenged him, raising an eyebrow.

His hand went through his hair, making one strand of platinum hair fall on his forehead before both of his hands rested on the table near mine. "Everything."

Since I knew I wouldn't be able to concentrate with his eyes never leaving me and I was aching to know how he was doing, I started, knowing fully well what his answer would be, "Where were you the past three days?" 

I was nearly hoping he would tell me a complete answer, but my little hopes vanished as he muttered, "Business." As I stared into his eyes, I could see that he, too, was disappointed in his response.

My eyes were saddened at the sight. I could feel that he wanted to reach out, that he wanted to take some words off his chest, but something was pulling him back. "How are your scars?" 

It took him a moment before answering, "Better." He was lying. He could still feel the stinging in every part of his body as the trauma was still inside him. "Can I see you tonight?" He asked, trying to get away from the uncomfortable conversation.

I hesitated for a while. Was it smart? "Where?" I didn't even realise I said that. It was like my subconsciousness was taking over my body. 

"At the astronomy tower, at nine." He said as a light of joy passed his eyes.

I lowered my head to look at my homework as I muttered the words, "I'll think about it." I could still feel his eyes on me as he rose from his chair and stood beside me.

He lowered himself to my level, making me look back at him in surprise. His lips landed on mine without warning before whispering, "Don't think too much." He straightened again and walked away, leaving me wanting more. Swiftly, I looked around, making sure for the hundredth time that no one else was in the Library, that no one else could have glimpsed at our shared moment. My eyes landed on the librarian, who didn't even seem to notice Draco had entered the Library in the first place.

My heart couldn't help but flutter as I realised what had just happened. I was head over heels for a boy who only screamed terrible news.