Hope Believe Magic

Break up

Shivu kissed AK's forehead before covering him up with the blanket and whispered, "Good night." He pulled her close to him and pecked her cheek and said, "Good night maa. Neeyum rest eduthukko". She smiled and dimmed the lights. Due to the effects of the medications, AK dozed off right away. Rachna was eager to hear the rest of the story.

The two ladies sat on the sofa and Shivu continued,"Like I said, all these were too much for me to handle. Already ennoda friend vera break up panna solli advice pannina. AK was surrounded by PR's, legal people, his producers etc that he barely got the time to answer my calls. He would message me but it would be very late in the night and I wouldn't see the message until morning. Morning la naan message podardhukulla he would be busy. Meanwhile there were rumours linking him with his costars and my over protective family started getting worried for me. Finally oru naal Appa enkitta pesinaar, "Shivu maa, nee meet panniappo irundha AK romba maaritaan maa. He isn't the same person. I don't think this will work. You better move on and take care of your life. Avanoda better aa unakku kandippa yaaravudhu varuva. I think you deserve better. Naan sollavendiyadhu sollitten aparam un ishtam." My heart was literally breaking. I went to my room and cried for hours. Evvalo neram nu kooda therila but, at some point I dozed off. I woke up late at night and my phone was blinking. It was a message from him, "Maa nee thoongirpe. Sorry. I have to leave to Kodaikanal for my shoot and I will be in the forest shooting so 5 days ku network irukaadhu. I miss you so much maa. Unna paakanam pola irukku. Unna katti pudichu azhanam pola irukku. Enna nadakkudhu ne onnum purila. Just remember I love you" but I was so emotionally overwhelmed that indha message a naan ozhunga kooda padikkala. As soon as I saw that he was going to Kodaikanal, I remembered a rumour I had seen that morning about him going away for a holiday with his co-star. I was so angry that I messaged him in block letter, "IT IS OVER. YOU ARE NOT THE GUY I FELL IN LOVE WITH. 🙏🏽" and I sent it. Then I cried again for a few more hours. The next morning, in a better frame of mind I read his message and I realized that he had actually said he loved me. I thought I could quickly retrieve my message before he could see it but that's when I noticed that he had seen it and I saw the three dots appearing, he was texting. My heart was beating like crazy. I wanted him to be mad at me. I wanted him to convince me but, alas, his reply was, "unkitta ennala no solla mudiyadhe maa."

After that his phone was switched off and he removed me from his contact list. The only way I could reach him was through social media but he had taken a break from there too. I was depressed so I went to my ancestral home, my haven and spent time with family. Although all of them knew about us, no one spoke a word about it. They kept me entertained. I spent a couple of weeks there and had to get back home because I had some recording to do. I avoided all our common friends. Few weeks went by. I was pretending to be normal but the moment the sun set, my heart started missing him.

One weekend my friends and I decided to go to a club. It was a nice place with some good music. Mom and Dad encouraged me to go out as I had lost the interest to even interact with people. I reluctantly agreed to go. We ordered our pizza and our soft drinks and were chitchatting where someone tapped my shoulder. It was Prakash, a very good friend of AK. He was one of those close circle of friends who had met us. He had even come for our play. I was pleasantly surprised to see him there and I quickly greeted him with a hug, "Prakash anna eppidi irukkenga?" He hugged me back but I knew he was dying to tell me something. I asked, "Ennanna edhavudhu prachanaiya?" He nodded and said, "Illa da onnum illa. Nee happy ya irukkiya ma?" I smiled and nodded. He smiled sadly and said, "Unna pathi enakku theriyum maa. Indha mugathula irukara sirippu un kannula theriliye? Nee kekalainaalum sollaren. Avan oorukku poitaan. Ellaroda contacts cut panni. Oorla poi Avan room la kadhava moodittu irukaan. Avanga amma enakku call panni orey azhugai. Veetla Avan unnoda break up panittan nu soleerkan. Neenga rendu perum orey oru Vaati pesi theethukalaame. Mukka vaasi prachanaiyum pesina takkunu mudinjudum maa. Adhukku aparamum unga mudivu idhu thaan naa, then so be it. It is totally up to you guys. Naan sollavendiyadhu solitten. Avan naalikki thirumba varaan. Naan oru project pathi pesanum nu soleerken. Ennoda office ku 11am ku varuvaan. If you want to give this a chance, if you still have a tad bit of love for him, then please come and see him. Adhukku aparam un ishtam."

This seemed like the angels were talking to me. Even though my brain kept saying it is over, my heart was yearning for a moment with him. I wanted to see him one last time. So at 11:15am the following day, I walked into Prakash Anna's office.

Brinda Subramanian