A Cold Start - Anakin x Reader

the best hour

Anakin and I had been back at the temple on Coruscant for a while now.

I'd be lying if I said it wasn't quite an adjustment to be back here after all this time away and the strange feeling was compounded by the fact that so much had happened between Anakin and I in the meantime that we couldn't just get back into our old routines. Even though our activities in the temple hadn't changed much, everything felt completely new and different from before. In general, I felt like a lifetime had passed between now and the last time we were in the temple, when Anakin was still my cold-hearted master who went out of his way to give me a hard time.

And now, oh how the tables had turned, Anakin was my master and my lover.

The former was both a blessing and a curse: it was a blessing because it meant that it was imperative for us to spend time together; and it was a curse because the council had a certain image of us as master and padawan in mind that we had to maintain and live up to. After all, it would be weird and suspicious if we suddenly started acting very differently from how we used to. So, Anakin and I had to put on a show every day, and even if there didn't seem to be anyone around to play a role to, there was still that big residual fear that someone might catch us talking amiably and familiarly to each other, training or indulging in other activities...

There were actually a lot of other activities going on. And while I missed the freedom of being alone with Anakin in places were no one would say or notice anything, the secrecy around our relationship had something undeniably thrilling about it, too.

"I know what is at stake, Y/N, trust me. But that doesn't mean we can't have a little fun along the way.", Anakin had said to me. And he was right. Fun we did have.

Although it was like playing with fire, I actually enjoyed the secret little moments we shared in the temple more than I had thought I would. I was sure this was partly due to the fact that there was an incredible tension between us from the moment we met in the morning to the moment we said good night. Because when you were around that one person you'd love to do all kinds of passionate things with all day, but couldn't and weren't allowed to turn any of these desires into actions, it was incredibly cruel, it was torture. Yet, at the same time, the brief moments of intimacy we did share were then all the more rewarding after ages of tension build up and teasing.

A quick brush of a hand, intense looks across the room, his smirk, a wink, words spoken through our comlinks or if we were lucky even a quick peck on the lips around the corner of a corridor all made my desire for him grow more and more throughout the days. And whenever we almost couldn't stand the tension anymore, a sweaty training session, where physical contact was inevitable, was more than welcome. Here we could let off some steam and above that, it wasn't so suspicious if Anakin trapped me between him and a wall or our bodies were close otherwise.

I guess we could have relieved most of that often cruel tension between us in another, a lot simpler way- namely by me secretly going over to his room at night where we would have enough time to express our love (as Anakin had already suggested a hundred times), but so far I had always refused this idea. It was just too dangerous.

No, I had not forgotten that I had been in Anakin's room at night before, when he first revealed his feelings to me, but back then I had gone back to my own room after an hour, which was something that would no longer be possible under the present circumstances. Simply, because I knew we would get carried away. It wasn't going to be just simple conversation between us. And once I was in his arms and in his bed, no one could get me out of there so easily. I would then eventually fall asleep and the next thing in the morning, I would get caught in the hallway sneaking out of his room. For sure.