65. Check Mate

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You don't know what you have until you lose it

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You don't know what you have until you lose it.

It's a quote that I knew all too well because I had almost lost the love of my life. Not a day goes by that I don't think about that awful day that Katerina met me at the god forsaken motel and learned about my mafia identity.

In that moment I almost lost her because I had decided to abandon my gut and rational thinking and give in to the peer pressure of my father.

I'm not blaming him for me choosing to bomb the place, I made the call.

But coming face to face with Katerina in the aftermath I decided that I would no longer abide by the word of my father.

Why should I listen to that sorry excuse of a man?

My father is an evil man and watching the way Katerina's father interacts with not just his family but his mafia as well. Made me realize how wrong I was for trying to please my father.

Vald Invaov had reached the top and he did it in a way my father swore was impossible. Vald made me and the whole underworld see that you can lead with fairness, be respected, loved and still be powerful.

You don't have to be evil, and someone who harms innocents to get to the top.

My father was wrong.

Not just wrong, my father was a sick psychopath who only cares about himself and the mafia.

He entered the world alone and unloved, the same way he'll leave it.

I entered the world the same- my dad hated me because I would be used as a weakness. Not just a normal weakness that but at that time a weakness that couldn't even fight back.

And my mother was apparently some crack whore who chucked me to my father for a month's supply of heroin.

But I'll be damned if I leave the world in the same manner.

My father swore that I didn't need love, and as I got older, he made sure to make me feel like no one could love me.

It was one of the reasons why I was fine with being married to the mafia- until her.

Katerina Invov is the love of my life, that can't eat, can't sleep, reach for the stars, over the fence, World Series kind of stuff.

That's what we have. I had lost it once; I'm not going to lose it again. Even if it's the last thing that I do I'm going to make sure that Katerina is brought back home.

Even if we can't have our happy ending, she'll have hers at least.

"Enzo," Lucca's voice comes out soft and timid almost like he's afraid I'll break down if he speaks with even the smallest amount of malice.

"What?" I snap while putting down the picture frame holding a snapchat that Alina had taken of my farfalla and I dancing under some light raindrops.

One of our many spontaneous moments that made me fall even more in love with my girl.

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