Patsy (the victim)

54

5months later

"Babe look."Bilal yell at zahra'u who's attention is in the pot on the stove as she turn.

"They are too big, dice it into 4places,
Bilal cut the carrot for God sake, why are you shaping them that way."zahra'u say tiredly shaking her head already used to Bilal infantile behavior whenever he chooses to help in the kitchen.

"Triangles,
Are Cool,
Should i tell you secret?"Bilal say in a whisper and zahra'u chuckle shaking her head ignoring him as he throw the knife and catch it in his hand.

"Stop playing with sharp object,
God Bilal wlh sometimes you make me talk even more than mama,
Leave if you don't want to be reasonable."zahra'u say and Bilal sigh sitting with a heavy sigh on one of the kitchen stool as he stare at zahra'u.

It feel so weird to be true, but it takes alot of pleading for zahra'u to agreed to give him a chance, he won't say there marriage life is perfect especially with zahra'u cranky attitude, there are days where she ignore him throughout, some days she she looks all happy while other days gloomy, he's used to all her mood swings and now five months later his dream is finally coming to life, the only problem he is facing is zahra'u insecurities, she doesn't let him touch her let alone share a bedroom with him, it's traumatizing for Bilal because he love zahra'u and he want her to understand the fact that he doesn't care about how she looks or the so called diseases she keeps talking about as do it's a death sentence.

"I wonder where hashim stops by,
I hope he doesn't buy any sugary thing for mama."zahra'u say glancing at Bilal but he seems lost in his thought making her to throw a spoon at him and he quickly look towards her.

"What are you thinking of?"zahra'u ask with a glance and bilal sigh release a heavy breathe.

"You."he say with a smile and zahra'u shake her head.
He stand up from the stool and walk to where she's standing.

"Zahra'u did you find me irritating or something?"Bilal ask, it's been on his mind, sometimes he wonder if zahra'u is irritated to share same bed with him because of there past.

"Why will you say that?"zahra'u say with a sigh knowing very well where the conversation is heading to.

"Because."Bilal shrug with a sigh.
You don't even let me touch you or even.......
I want to feel you next to me zahra'u,
I want to make love to you and do whatever couples do with each other."Bilal say with a sigh and even zahra'u can sense the frustration in his voice.

Zahra'u stay quiet as she continue cooking, she doesn't know what to say to Bilal, sure she know agreeing to give Bilal another chance will come with all this responsibility but this is huge for her, she's afraid, she doesn't want to be the reason he will have to also spend his life on medication.

"Zahra'u."Bilal call with a sigh.
"I love you ,
There are alot of family out there living happy with HIV,
I'm not going to force you to do anything you don't want to but........
I want us to be a normal family."he say and zahra'u sigh.

The parlour door screech open and zahra'u sigh in relief as there daughter giggling voice run towards the door.

"Maman mama I'm never going out with your daughter again."hashim say coming inside the kitchen as zahra'u look up with a smile.

"What did she do?
Mama what did you do to uncle Hashim?"zahra'u ask and mama just giggle as Bilal lift her up.

"You people forgot,
Today is the mall grand opening."hashim say dropping the grocery bag on the kitchen island.

"Bilal you promised to take us."zahra'u say and Bilal nod.

"Yes after we finish eating ofcrse."he say and zahra'u roll her eyes.

The three eat the food quickly as hashim and bilal make random conversation about business and school, zahra'u keeps glancing at Bilal even do he caught her several times she couldn't help, she want to tell him something but she decided to push all thought about it after they got back from the mall.

*******************
Briskly walking around the mall she grab few of the diapers and throw it into the cart as she sigh, she scroll through her phone at thesame time pushing the loaded cart and collide into someone making her to look up.

"Ohhh,
If it isn't the famous zahra'u."Aliyah say her voice deep with sarcasm and zahra'u step aside.

She quietly walk pass Aliyah not wanting to create a scene but Aliyah,
Mutter stupid harlot under her breathe and zahra'u stops.

"Aliyah i leave your husband .........

"It doesn't matter right,
Look zahra'u you know what i hate most about you?
It's the fact that you act as do you are the only victim in this planet, you hide under your past and wretch people's happiness, I don't like you and .....

"I don't act like a victim Aliyah,
I am a victim and whatever it is that happened in my past I'm greatful because...........

"Ofcrse you will be greatful i mean,
You don't have a choice right?"Aliyah say with a loud hiss as zahra'u shake her head and head for the mall exit.

Each time she meet Aliyah she always have a way with word that brutally hurt her feelings, as she briskly absentmindedly cross the mall parking space to meet up with hashim the Blaring sound from her back makes her loss her balance as the red Mercedes G-waggon run over her with full speed.

********************
Zahra'u pov

Loosing both my legs is the most traumatizing thing that happened to me, it makes me realizes that the simplest things we don't appreciate really those matter, as always Bilal has been there for me, I feel like i can't give him that happiness he deserve, for the past 1month since the incident i just learn to push all negative thought inside of me aside, some days i have to wonder why my own fate is twisted like this, there are days i cry and want to question the almighty but then i realize all that doesn't matter, life will not always be a bed of roses, I have learned to accept to be a victim because at the end everyone is a victim one way or other in life, some have make wrong choices while others are been used, some of us are been taken advantage of while others deal with rejection, it's all part of cycle of life but if we learn to accept every change in good fate then we will always be happy.

I am starting a foundation for the needy single mother's and HIV victims, it's the only way it will get me some closure from all the trauma i have been through, until we learn to accept our difference only then we will find happiness, so right now i don't mind, I don't mind people knowing I'm a victim, I don't mind telling my story and i don't mind people judging me because at the end,
We are all Patsy, everyone of us has been taken advantage of one way or the other but the best way to heal is to move on, to accept our difference and let go.

"Guess what!"Bilal yell running inside the parlour as i give h a bored expression.

"Mama's test result is out,
They said she doesn't need the dialysis anymore, She's finally a healthy baby."Bilal say as i just stare at him ranting about things that doesn't even matter, he kiss me on the cheek and head upstairs making me to release a deep breathe.