The Fifty Lessons

30. CARING

These days its really common for us to say "I don't care".
Because we feel that 'not caring' is cool or another way to look at this is that we get too tired by caring for all and eventually end up breaking our ownselves, it is then that we promise ourselves to never bother again and to never care again.
But is it the right way to deal with people? Most importantly is it the right way to deal with life?
No, it isn't.
We think that its okay to not care because that way we can save ourselves from getting hurt but what we tend to forget is that our caring nature is what makes us human.
It is our humanity which makes us different from others.
And many people think that if we care a lot we end up getting hurt which is not true.
You get hurt when you ONLY care for others and not for yourself.
You get hurt when you care for the wrong people.

And,
You do not get hurt, if you care for others ALONG WITH caring for yourself.
You do not get hurt when you care for the right people.

So what is important is for you to know who are the right people and what is the right way of caring.

So who are the right people?
The people who are not using you for your caring nature.
Care for the people who appreciate your for that and care about you just as much.

What is the right way of caring?
Right way of caring about people is when you care about yourself as well.
We all know that we can't love others if we don't love ourselves, similarly you cannot actually care for others unless you care for yourself first.
So when you know that caring too much about a person is in turn hurting you, then you must stop, because if your own mental health is raveling, then there's no way you can think about others. If you are not in a peaceful mind state then first look out for yourself, because your mental state affects everyone around you, and in order to actually care for them, you need to be mentally stable.
So if you think that people are using you, or caring about them is harming you then stop right there.

Also, we all are having our life struggles to deal with. But sometimes it gets too hard for us to face it and this generation has found a solution for that which is to say "I don't care", which is actually not a solution but a way to avoid the problems.
If something too overwhelming happens instead of finding a way to deal with it, we just run away by saying "I don't care" when we all know that beneath we all do care!
We just want a way to avoid facing the cruelty of life, but its not possible.
It is our life, and we will have to deal with it.
No matter how far you try to run away, your problems will chase you, so don't try to avoid it rather sit down and deal with it, the pain has to be felt, just saying "I don't care" and dying inside won't help.
Everyone has to face their share of adversities and there is no running away.
You do care, accept it.
Its okay to breakdown, Its okay to cry, Its okay to feel overwhelmed, all your feelings are valid.
Yes, life does seem like a tough nut to crack sometimes, but remember that every problem is born with a solution and it lies within you.
All your problems, all your pain, all your suffering is in your head. And in your heart lies the solution to it all.
All you need to do is calm yourself and analyze the problem but that will only happen when you accept that yes, I do care about whatever that is happening in my life and I will find a way to deal with it.

Remember, running away is not a solution, never has been, never will be.
So deal with it, and there's no way you wouldn't find a way out.
And also remember, that "not caring" is never cool. Today's generation might make you feel that becoming a savage human without emotions seems cool, but it isn't because even those savage cold hearted people that claim that they don't care, do care from inside. Its just that they were hurting a lot so they just decided to avoid everything and say that they don't care, but trust me, even they cry at nights.
So no matter how much you say you don't care, you do care.
So when you have to care in either case, its better to accept that you care and deal with life and accept it the way it is.
Not caring, is not cool.
Caring is what makes you a human.
And loosing that is just the same as loosing the essence of your own existence.
So don't fall a prey to those fake social media sayings, where they say that not caring is peaceful, because thats just a way to shut down your problems and eventually you will have to care, you will have to face so better do that in the first place.
Care about your life, care about yourself, care about others, even if you think that makes you old-school remember that atleast it makes you a human!

Choice is yours.