A Court of Scars and Shadows

Anger Does the Talking

GWYN'S POV

Gwyn walked away and when she was sure that she was away from the Shadowsinger's view, she ran as fast as her beast can take her. She had so many mixed emotions.

She couldn't believe that she had touched his wings, or that he was hard. For her. She always knew that she had an attractive body, but with the robes she wore as a priestess, she never really showed it off, not that she wanted too. The months she spent in the Spring Court had boosted her confidence.

Her heart swelled when Azriel told her that she didn't have to continue, but the part of her that registered anger took over once she realized that he did it out of pity.  She was tired of people pitying her. Nesta and Emerie, her own sisters, always held a spark of pity in their eyes when they spoke to her. They never realized, but Gwyn did. Cassian, he always looked at her in training, making sure that she was alright. Normally, one would be thankful that they had someone to look after them, but Gwyn knew that he only did that to make sure she wasn't uncomfortable. She never told them that it bothered her, but when the Shadowsinger seemed to pity her, it angered to another level.

She knew that if she had asked either Nesta, Cassian, or Emerie to stay with her, they would have been mother hens. The Shadowsinger, however, she knew would keep to himself.

She was surprised when she found him about to enter the lake. She was curious to how he reacted when he saw the necklace she was using; there was an emotion on his face that she couldn't pin. His reaction to her telling him to turn around was hilarious, but when he wouldn't turn back, Gwyn had to contain her laughter. With the Shadowsinger, everything felt easier with him, she felt that she could be her true self without any judgement. She had felt a pull every time she was near him, but she always ignored it.

When she felt his pity, she realized that it wasn't the first time he had done it. Every other time she had pushed it away because of the way she felt when she hanged around him, but this time it felt like the last straw. She felt everyone's pity wash into her at once. She knew she lashed out at Azriel, but she was tired of it. She would feel as if she was moving forward, but every time she saw someone's pity, it felt as a reminder of what happened. She didn't think that bottling up her anger and emotions had effected her so badly.

She kept running until she reached the cave she had slept in when she initially arrived at the Spring Court. She didn't shift out of her beast, she felt calmer in the beast than when she was in her normal form. She realized that Azriel's shadows had went with her and didn't go back to their master. She was tried to care about what it meant.

She went to drink at the pond. As she looked up at the sky, the orange from sunset mixed with the purple of the night. She felt herself grow tried and decided to stay at the cave instead of going back to Rosehall. She didn't feel like answering Tamlin's questions. She entered the cave and as soon as she laid down, she drifted off to sleep a dreamless sleep.

AZRIEL'S POV

She didn't come back to manor. He had sent for Rhysand just liked she asked and when he returned from the cliff, a servant told him that Gwyn had yet to arrive. He felt his chest constrict tightly and he couldn't breathe. He tried to call in his shadows, but it was like they had disappeared, just as they did last time Gwyn had left.

He tried to gather his breathing, but he couldn't. His breaths came in shorts gasps.

She couldn't have left again.

So Azriel sat in a chair in front of the entrance and waited for her to come back.

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