Oneshot Collection

To Crumble Without Breaking: Sophitz

Well, this was a prompt from Tumblr (yes I'm now on Tumblr because my brain decided it was getting too much sleep and spending too much time on work)

So here we go, with a good ol' Sophitz oneshot! Enjoy!

The words piled up in his brain, and Fitz knew it was only a matter of time until they spilled over.

A tidal wave, a tsunami spreading through him until he could hardly take it anymore.

Soon, he would break, and he didn't know how much longer he could hold himself together.

Today was worse than usual; his father had been harsher, his mentors stricter, even his friends joking about how perfect he was.

They were teasing, of course (they always were) but the words still managed to add to the piling sentences and phrases overflowing in his mind.

"Wonderboy can never miss class, he might risk getting detention!" His friends laughed, but they didn't know how right they were. ('I've gotten detention before,' Fitz thought, biting his lip. 'Worst day- most stressful day- of my life.')

"I expect perfection. You are a Vacker and you must act like it," his father constantly told him. ('Don't you think I know that?' he would consider shouting. 'You only remind me every day.' But the words stayed inside, bottled up like always)

"You seem a little distracted today, Mr. Vacker. Perhaps you might consider taking a break?" His mentors sometimes said absentmindedly. ("No," he'd respond, fingers tapping his knee under the desk. "I don't want a break.")

But no matter what they said, no one could be any harder on Fitz than himself.

He was trying to work on it.

But no matter how much he told himself to relax and take a breather and just not care, he couldn't manage to do it.

So he powered through; he completed everything perfectly, and he remained the Golden Boy of the Golden Family. He completed all of his tests flawlessly because he was a Vacker and he couldn't bear the thought of a mistake. 

He maintained his appearance with every styled hair, every seam in his unwrinkled clothes, and his flashy grin that never seemed quite real enough. (Put-together, composed, eradicate all mistakes and you'll go far, he was constantly told)

But the avalanche of expectation was weakening with every passing day, and Fitz knew he couldn't hold on much longer.

...

He was crumbling.

He was crumbling and collapsing and all of his carefully constructed boundaries were tumbling down.

His lip trembled with the effort of keeping his emotions bridled, and he squeezed his fists tightly together as he mouthed words to himself (conceal it, you are fine, you cannot break)

A tear leaked out of his eye, and he swiped it away with trembling fingers. No one could see. No one could know. No one could...

It was a little too late, apparently, because footsteps were sounding in the hallway where he sat slumped against the wall (but he was missing a class, he couldn't-) and shoes appeared at the edge of his vision before stopping right next to him. He didn't dare look up; he already knew who it was, and even though every part of him hated letting her see him like this, he couldn't seem to make himself tell her to go.

Sophie sat down next to him hesitantly, her fingers tapping the ground quickly before she seemed to make some sort of decision and wrapped her arms around Fitz, pressing their foreheads together momentarily before allowing his face to sink into her shoulder.

He melted into the hug, letting himself cry onto her red tunic. Her arms tightened around him, and she rested her head against his own, scootching the tiniest bit closer.

For once, Fitz didn't care that he wasn't perfect.

For once, he let go of his thoughts and just let out the tears and sadness and anxiety and insecurity that had festered inside him for so long.

He didn't know how long they stayed that way, Fitz wrapped in Sophie's arms as he slowly came back into his body.

When he felt good enough to lift his head, he sat up and met Sophie's brown eyes, her forehead wrinkled with concern. His head immediately dipped again, already bottling up his embarrassment for another time (or hopefully never; this could be a one-time thing; he wouldn't break again).

Sophie stood up abruptly, and he glanced up without meaning to. Her chin held a determined tilt, and he startled as she grabbed his hand and pulled him up to his feet.

"What are you-" Fitz tried to say, scrubbing at his eyes with his free hand.

"Come on," Sophie insisted, tugging him behind her as she ran through the Foxfire halls,  eyes scanning her surroundings. He frowned, allowing himself to be led through the halls.

But when he realized they were headed out the doors to the leapmaster, he protested: "But class! I can't ditch-" (no, he couldn't ditch and get detention he'd already missed enough as it is)

"Just follow me, okay? This'll help. Promise." Sophie's eyes stared into his, and he closed his eyes and nodded, taking a deep breath to calm his shredded nerves. And the leap in his stomach when she grabbed his hand again was almost worth it; especially when she stepped closer as they glittered away.

But when their surrounding rematerialized, Fitz had to think something was wrong with Sophie's reasoning.

"We're... home?"

"Wait here," Sophie told him as concern filled her eyes again. "I'll be right back."

He was still crumbling, he knew; all the pent up rage and exhaustion and sadness and anxiety were still overwhelming him, and he could hardly think straight. His walls had crumbled, and he'd allowed Sophie to see his inner turmoil.

But she hadn't left him, she hadn't balked.

So he nodded slowly, puzzled as she ran towards the gate, which opened.

He didn't know who had given her permission to enter, but he was grateful.

But as she ran towards the house, nerves gripped him again. (What if someone was home and saw her? They'd know Fitz wasn't at school but he should be at school his teachers would notice and give him detention he couldn't get detention he was a Vacker-)

But Sophie was jogging back towards him, her hands clasped behind her back in a peculiar manner. Fitz eyed her nervously, knowing his eyes were still red and burning and there were probably a few stray tears on his face as she stopped in front of him.

"Here," she said, bringing out a familiar sight from behind her back.

A sparkly dragon stuffed animal stared back at him, and Fitz couldn't help but smile as Mr. Snuggles was set in his arms.

Sophie smiled at him as he squeezed the stuffed dragon tightly, burying his face in the familiar toy.

"Thanks," he said softly, smiling at her. This grin was different than most of his others; warm and soft instead of fake and overly flashy. He tried to convey his gratitude through it, and Sophie got the message as she wrapped him back into a hug.

He let his arms come around her waist, and a few more tears trickled down his cheeks before he cleared his throat and stepped away, hugging Mr. Snuggles tight.

"Anytime," Sophie responded, her voice quiet but firm. She pressed a quick kiss to Fitz's cheek before stepping back, her eyes sparkling with a mixture of satisfaction and sadness. "Anytime."

Ahem

So... yeah. Mr. Snuggles is amazing and I love him.

Hope you liked it! This one actually was proofread, but it's 2:30 am right now so it still might not be the best-

So yeah :)