When Steve woke up by the sound of the alarm on his phone, the sun was already shining through the curtains. Happily welcoming another beautiful day and chasing away the dark night.
The rain had stopped falling, and the sky was clear blue with not a single cloud at sight.
It was a really beautiful day.
The blond would have smiled at the thought of going somewhere after school with Sam and Bucky, but now, he didn't feel anything.
The only thing he cared about was the warm feeling of Tony's sleeping body against his.
The night hadn't been as peaceful as it used to be, because of his fear, Tony had woken up in the middle of the night.
He hadn't said anything, but he'd been sitting up in the bed, panting heavily while looking around himself. Only to cover his face with his hands and cry silently in his palms. He probably didn't know that Steve had woken up and worried about him. At least now Tony was asleep, buried into the sheets of the bed so only his eyes and hair were visible.
Steve smiled sadly at him, deciding not to wake up him just yet. He needed sleep. Instead, the blond got up from the bed and pulled on the t-shirt from the night before. He was very aware of the sounds that came from the kitchen downstairs. And that he probably wasn't going to go very far without telling his parents that there was a broken teenager in his bedroom.
"Where are you going?"
Steve froze in his steps as a deep morning voice suddenly was heard from behind him.
"Just getting some food." He answered softly and turned to the bed. "You want some?"
"You do realize that the only thing we've been talking about these hours is food." Tony said, his voice very low. Which made Steve's heart crack.
Tony was laying on his back with the covers up to his chin and one of his arms under his messy raven hair. But his eyes were locked in an empty corner in the room, tired and bloodshot from the horrible night.
"Sorry." Steve said, only to receive nothing. "Do you still want some?" He asked hesitantly.
Tony thought for a moment before slowly shaking his head.
Steve frowned. "You have to eat something.."
Tony still didn't answer.
"I'll eat later." He said after a while.
Steve nodded slowly. "Okay...I'll just go down and tell my mom that you're here. And that you'll probably be staying here for a while."
Tony's eyebrows raised as Steve caught his attention. "What?"
Steve stopped in his tracks once again. "What?"
"I can't stay here- I mean...I don't wanna be a burden." He mumbled, now looking away again. Probably embarrassed about himself.
"You're not a burden." Steve just said assuringly, before walking out of the bedroom.
Tony followed him with his eyes as he disappeared through the door and closed it behind him.
Finally alone.
Alone in the darkness and the soft sheets of Steve's bed that felt so good against his skin. They were so incredibly comfortable, and the smell. The smell of Steve and other saints he couldn't put his finger on.
Even though he was in this position, a position he never thought he would ever be in, he felt nothing. His eyes were staring up into the ceiling with no emotion in them. His face was pale and cold, and his legs felt paralyzed as they refused to move. He didn't want to move.
The feeling of regret, guilt, and sorrow was still there. Stronger than ever before and tore him down into the mattress. He didn't find any strength to cry anymore. He just felt empty.
After laying there for a while, he decided to try and lift some muscles to reach his phone, Steve had probably placed it on the bedside table when he was asleep.
10 missed calls: Howard.
8 texts: Howard.
Tony quickly deleted the notification. He refused to open any of the messages or answer any of the calls. He knew he was a disappointment. He didn't need to be reminded. Instead, he opened up the snapchat group where Clint, Natasha and Rhodes seemed to have had a boring night.
"Idiots." He mumbled to himself. After trying to answer a few snaps, he decided to ignore them instead. He didn't know what to say or what to comment. He didn't want to talk. He didn't want to see anyone.
And there it was again. The feeling.
The feeling that made him want to bang his head into the wall and throw up.
Feeling of guilt.
The words of his father kept repeating themselves inside his head, and he couldn't shut them down. It didn't matter how much he tried to go cover his ears or listen to something else. They were always there.
Not only voices. But pictures too.
Pictures of his mother. His beautiful, beautiful mother with her blond hair and kind eyes. Her soft voice and elegant attitude. And memories. Oh god they were killing him....
Tony closed his eyes and inhaled deeply through his nose, before exhaling again. He felt like crying, but there was nothing left. Just empty space and terrifying mind ghosts that tried to tear him down piece by piece.
"Keep it together Stark." He whispered to himself before sitting up from the amazingly warm sheets. Figuring that he should try and focus his mind on something else. But what was there to focus on? All his stuff was back at his place with a drunk alcoholic to father that guarded his house like a fucking hawk.
The genius chewed his bottom lip thoughtfully before deciding to move a little in the bed so he was close to Steve's desk. Curiously looking into the different boxes while trying to swallow down the feeling of guilt and sorrow.
Without any big interest, he picked out a black sketchbook with dark blue details on the frame. It was a very pretty block, with a lot of pages. Tony's tired eyes travelled over the sides. They were all filled with beautiful landscapes drawn with pencils, and different portraits of random people he didn't know. He could never have imagined that this is what Steve was drawing in his free time, or that it could be this good. The proportions and colors were all just right and oddly satisfying for his eyes.
Impressed, he kept changing pages with a numb facial expression, his thoughts miles away from where he actually was. Until he found one specific page.
He didn't even hear when the door opened and how the blond came into the room.
"Hey Tony I-" Steve stopped midsentence as he stepped into the room.
Tony was sitting at the foot of the bed with messy morning hair next to his desk, with a book in his hands. His mouth slightly ajars while his eyes travelled over the papers.
The older guy swallowed nervously before running up to the bed, snatching the block from Tony's hands without thinking. The brown-eyed looked up at him with a raised eyebrow. His facial expression was unreadable as he just sat there and watched him.
"Sorry I just-" Steve began when he realized what he just had done. "This is just...you know...private." he explained shamefully.
Tony didn't say anything as his eyes were locked on the sketchbook. Almost like he was thinking through what he just had witnessed.
"They're good." He then said.
Steve closed his mouth. "Pardon?"
"The drawings. They're really good." He said, now looking into Steve's eyes with a small smile. "I really love the 34th."
Steve raised his eyebrows before opening his book and silently counting the pages as he tried to find the right sketch. Only to let a deep blush appear on his cheeks when he realized what drawing it was.
It was a sketch of Tony. The first day they met.
"And the 35th." Tony smirked.
Steve changed the page and smiled. It was another one of him.
"And....36th."
"You're very narcissistic." Steve laughed as he sat down in the bed next to the younger guy. Both looking at the drawings of Tony, sitting at the school desk with his feet on the surface and a small smirk on his face.
Tony shrugged. "Maybe a little." He said while thoughtfully looking at the sketch.
Steve smiled. "Even though, these aren't really my favorites." He said and changed a few pages forward. "But this-" Steve laughed and Tony looked over the blond's shoulder to get a better view, only to have a small smile spread over his lips.
"I have a feeling that this is when we were fighting." He said, his voice finally getting a little happier tone.
The white paper was covered by a sketch of Tony. He was standing on a very similar table to what they had been planning decorations at, with his arms crossed and a demanding expression on his face. While the rest of the class looked at him uninterested from their own seats.
The text next to him said; "I own the world"
"Is this how you see me?" Tony asked with a small laugh.
Steve shook his head. "This is how I saw you. At first."
Tony looked at him.
"Now I know that you're so much more." Steve mumbled, not meeting Tony's eyes while the raven-haired tried to keep it together.
Tony blinked his eyes a few times, looking away from the blond and his sketchbook while Steve stood up and put the book back into his desk.
"I've left some food for you in the fridge, I figured you probably don't want to go to school."
Tony answered with a grunt as he threw himself into the bed again. "You don't have to do all of this for me Steve."
"But I want to." The blond answered with a small smile. "Now get some sleep. I have to get going."
"Steve?"
The blond stopped as he was on his way out through the door. "Yea?"
Tony bit his lip. "Can you keep this all a secret?"
Steve looked at him with a blank face.
"I don't want Rhodes or Clint or even Bruce stomp into my father's house and kill him. I just...want to be alone."
Steve eyed the dark-haired up and down.
"I'm gonna try."
~
Well that promise was harder to keep than he thought it was gonna be. Even Thor had been asking where Tony was and why he wasn't answering any texts or snaps. And not even to talk about Pepper who seemed to go bananas by Tony's disappearing.
It even went so far that Bruce called for a small meeting after school at their normal place in the park. So now everyone was sitting together, including Steve's friends Bucky, Sam, and Thor.
"What if his dad beat him up again." Clint said thoughtfully with his head leaned against a tree, with Pietro laying next to him uninterested.
"He's out of town, you idiot." Rhodes answered. "Plus, Tony hasn't really taken the whole child abuse this seriously."
"And Tony would probably have escaped by now." Natasha said as she took a bite of the sandwich she had stolen from the cafeteria. Ignoring the looks she got now and then from a certain brown-haired soccer player a few meters away.
"Why are we even worried? Stark has always been very random. He's probably fine." Bucky grunted while uninterested playing with a stick between his fingers, where he was standing at the side of the group.
Sam bit his lip, almost like he was cringing at his friend when he received several angry looks. Natasha included.
Bruce, who was the only one who didn't take the comment seriously, turned to him with a calm look. "That's true, but he's never ignored our texts or calls before. He's always been a very social guy."
"Barnes has a point." Pietro said carefully, making Clint give him a shocked look. "I mean what if he's sick and his phone is broken?" Pietro asked with his thick accent, ignoring how his boyfriend bit his cheek in irritation.
"And what are the odds?" He snapped, making the swimmer look at him uninterested.
"Just saying."
"Steve-" Natasha quickly interrupted. Making the blond look up from his sketchbook.
"Hm?"
"When was the last time you spoke to Tony."
"Yesterday." He answered without thinking.
"See." Bucky said before sitting down next to Sam. "I don't think we should worry just yet, right Steve?"
The blond looked from Bucky to a thoughtful Natasha and an angry Clint. "Yea- yea no we shouldn't worry just yet. I'm sure he's fine. I-I actually texted with him this morning."
Bruce nodded convince just like Natasha, Wanda and Pietro did. Thor just looked confused.
Clint in other had looked at Rhodes, who was sitting with raised eyebrows. With a snort, Clint stood up on his feet.
"Screw this." He mumbled as he made his way over to the sea.
Pietro sighed before getting up. "I should probably join him before he decides to drown himself....or someone else." He mumbled quietly.
"Good idea." His sister agreed and took a sip from her water bottle.
"At least then you'll have someone to keep you company when you're swimming." Sam said, making all of them at least receive a smile. Expect Rhodes who snorted loudly.
"Very funny." Pietro said, rolling the r slightly as his accent escaped once again.
Thor was still confused. "What am I even doing here?" He asked.
"Nothing. Just making us look good." Rhodes answered.
"Sorry, that's my brother's job." Wanda pointed out casually. Pietro only smirked at her over his shoulder as he was walking towards the beach.
"I'll call him." Rhodes suddenly said and pulled out his phone. Catching the companies attention.
"Who? Stark?" Sam asked.
"Didn't you call him on our way here?" Wanda asked.
"And?" Rhodey said while putting his phone on speaker. He let the signal ring for a few seconds before sighing.
"Maybe he's busy." Steve said innocently. Not noticing how Bucky looked at him with narrowed eyes.
"With what?" Natasha snorted.
"Whatever he does when he's bored. Like suit building and robot planning and-"
"Suit building?" Bruce interrupted.
"Robot planning?" Bucky asked, now very suspicious about what Steve was talking about.
Steve swallowed. "Forget I said anything." He said before standing up, grabbing his things in the process. "I better head home." He said.
Bucky crossed his arms as he watched Steve disappear. He had known Steve long enough to already tell when he was lying. And pretty much everything he had said during this convention was a lie.
"You coming man?" Sam asked as he patted his shoulder. Pretty much everyone had already stood up from the grass and on their way home.
"Yea-" Bucky said, before his eyes caught something more important than going home and play video games. "I just have to do something first." He said before running off. Leaving a confused Sam behind him.
"Natasha! Wait up!"
The redhead turned around with a raised eyebrow when she heard how someone called her name from behind. Only to sigh and turn around again. Bucky quickened his pace and started running, not wanting the female to get rid of him just yet. "Hey listen- I need to talk to you."
"About what?" She asked uninterestedly.
"About how a certain Steve Rogers was lying right in our faces." He said, thankfully stopping next to her when she decided to go lean against the nearest tree.
"What do you mean?" She asked dryly with a blank face.
Barnes licked his lips nervously. "I know him. He wasn't telling the truth when we asked him about Stark. He is keeping something from us."
Natasha rolled her eyes while crossing her arms over her chest. "I've had enough of your bullcrap James."
"Well then listen to something that's not bullcrap for once." He snapped. "I don't know what I've done to deserve this attitude from you. I've tried everything and apparently, Stark isn't the only one who's ignoring calls-"
"We're not sure if he's ignoring them or if-"
"-or if something has happened to him, I get it." Bucky interrupted her irritated. "The point is, I can't live with myself while not knowing what I've done wrong." He said with his icy blue eyes buried into her soul. "Please...please tell me how I make it up to you."
Natasha didn't know what to answer. She didn't want to. Instead, she grabbed the collar of Bucky's hoodie and pulled him in. Connecting their lips roughly while immediately seeking her tongue between his lips.
Surprised and confused, the male closed his eyes while letting his hands grab the redhead's waist. Not knowing what else to do than kiss back. It felt good. Natasha's lips were just like he had imagined. Soft, and big and amazing as he could feel a slight taste of lip gloss.
Tasha inhaled sharply before slowly pulling back again, her hands releasing themselves from Bucky's brown hair as she tried to understand what just had happened.
Bucky smirked. "So we're good?"
Nat looked at him with bored eyes. "This will never happen again."
"Sure thing doll." Bucky said smugly.
"Don't call me doll."
"Doll."
"Idiot."
"You love it."
Natasha groaned before releasing herself fully from his grip. "If you weren't such an idiot, I would-" she ended her sentence when she realized that the guy in front of her wasn't listening.
His eyes were locked over her shoulder with a perfect raised eyebrow, and his mouth in a thoughtful line.
"Hey," she said, snapping her fingers in front of his face. "Eyes down here? Or are you already distracted by someone else?" She asked dryly.
Bucky still wasn't looking at her. "Nat look." He said.
"Bucky c'mon-"
"No seriously look! Isn't that- you know?" He said. The redhead turned her head slightly, not understanding a shit what Bucky was seeing cause the only thing she could see was the cafeteria on the other side of the street.
"It's a cafeteria?" She pointed out.
"No, I mean yes, but look who's sitting outside." He said with a little lower voice.
Natasha looked again. Only to narrow her eyes when she saw what Bucky was hyping over.
A woman, about their age, with dark brown hair that went to her collarbones and dark red lips. She was dressed in a pair of baggy jeans that fitter perfectly around her waist, decorated with a black belt. And a yellow t-shirt.
She was very, very beautiful.
Natasha growled as she looked back at James. "Seriously? You just kissed me and immediately spot someone sexier than me?"
Bucky opened his mouth to say something before catching what she just had told him. "I-what? No! Nat I was just- don't you know who that is?" He asked, now sweating nervously as he tried to save this situation.
"I don't wanna hear it James!" Natasha snapped before quickly walking past him.
"Natasha wait! This is a misunderstanding! I-I wasn't- I wouldn't- I- Natasha!"
****
And that's a dramatic piece of sh-
Hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'm not very proud of it but I guess I'll publish it either way. You've been waiting long enough.
See you next week!
Love Jess <3