"The Way That I Love You"
The dog heard him coming before I did. He woke out of a deep sleep on the rug and was completely alert and whining at the door. I knew this day was coming, but I had hoped I had more time to heal before he tried to force his way into my life again. I had just gotten out of the shower and was only wearing a brown bra and pantie set with a sheer kimono to match. I was sitting in my bed, and using the last few minutes of my day flipping through a wedding dress magazine.
The moment I heard my brown-furred Yorkie-poodle Winston whining at the door, I knew he was there. I remembered how stupid I was to forget to take the key to my apartment away from him.
I looked up from the magazine, my gaze going to the shadow under the door.
Closing the magazine, I tossed it on my bedside dresser and slowly got up from the bed. I tiptoed over to the door and stood there quietly. If I stayed quiet enough, maybe he would think I was asleep or not home at all.
Then again, knowing him, he could have been here all along while I was in the shower. He could have been waiting for me to walk out so he could surprise me.
I thought my idea of being silent was working until the knob twisted, and the door started to open.
"Nope!" I put all the weight that I could on the door, though I knew he was taller and way stronger than me. "
He could have rammed the door if he wanted, but he didn't. Instead, he just put his foot through the crack, which didn't stop me from trying to push the door closed.
"Get out, Adam!" I yelled in anger. Meanwhile, Winston began to bark.
He hated it when we fought.
"Ryan," his voice was weak and full of exhaustion more than usual. "I need your help."
I was so angry. I didn't care that something was wrong with him.
"I don't care. I told you we were done, for good!"
"Ryan, just listen to me," he started putting more weight on the door, pushing me back.
I didn't give up, despite losing, I continued to push as hard as I could.
"No, Adam! This cannot keep happening. You can't keep running back and -"
Looking up, I noticed his bloody hand in the crack of the door.
I quickly opened the door, and Winston came running in the room, hopped on my bed, and continued barking. I had opened the door so fast, Adam nearly crashed into me but managed to catch himself.
He looked like he had gotten into a boxing match. His right eye was bruising, there were gashes on the side of his sweaty head, gushing blood, and he had a busted lip. The most alarming thing was his hand clutched over his stomach. It let me know that he had gotten in more than just a fight.
"What did you do?" I sprang into action and started helping him toward the bed.
"No, no, no," he shook his head, limping toward the bathroom as he took off his jacket with a wince. He tossed it on the ground, "one went all the way through, the others still in me."
I followed him into the bathroom, turning on the light and picked up his jacket, "what are you talking about? What is still . . . "
To answer my question, he took off his shirt to reveal a bullet wound in his shoulder and lower abdomen.
"You've gotta be kidding me," I watched him crumble to the floor and lean against the bathtub.
"Come on," he sent me a sly smirk, "you gonna let me bleed out here or what?"
Lucky for him, he had put me in this predicament more times than I could count. By the medical supplies under my sink, you would have thought I was a doctor rather than a hairdresser.
Just like he had taught me, I took out the bullet, cleaned his wounds, and bandaged him up.
The whole time, he just smiled at me, which only made me angrier. Every time I tried to move on in my life, Adam and I ended up back here. He had this hold on me, and the worse part was, he knew it. He used it against me. I fell for it every time.
Tossing the used medical supplies in my bathroom trash bin, I then washed my hands in the sink. I felt his gaze from the bedroom but didn't bother to look. It wasn't until I looked into the mirror that I could see him staring at me through the reflection.
He was sitting on the edge of the bed, that playful smile on his lips.
After turning off the water, I dried my hands, turned off the light, and went into the bedroom.
Winston was curled up on one of my pillows, having finally calmed down once he realized we weren't fighting - for now.
"You did good," Adam looked down at his bandaged bullet wounds. "You've gotten better. The first time, you nearly passed out. Even puked afterward."
I rolled my eyes, going over to my dresser. In the second drawer were his t-shirts that I stole. I took out a black one and tossed it at him.
"You couldn't have gone to a hospital?" I poked my hip out and crossed my arms over my chest.
"You were closer," he shrugged. "Besides, you know it's better if I don't go to the hospital."
I bit my tongue, trying my best not to give him hell. Two months, the longest we've been broken up, and this is how he returns. I shouldn't have expected anything less.
He put his head through the neck hole of his shirt but had a hard time putting his arms through the sleeves without hurting his shoulder.
"Let me help," I went over.
I took the shirt off of him and slid it up his arms first. I then stretched it, so he could put his head through and then pulled it down.
The whole time, he kept his eyes on me.
"What, Adam?" I snapped.
"Nothing," he looked me up and down. "It just looks like I came at the right time."
He reached for my bra strap, but I grabbed his hand and tossed it down, "who shot you?"
"It doesn't matter," he stood.
I pushed back down on the bed, causing Winston's head to perk up.
"You broke into my house and came to me for help. So, yeah, it does matter."
"It's not breaking in if I have a key," he said matter-of-factly.
"Just answer the question, smart ass!" I yelled. "Just tell me who it is and that he's dead, and he's not coming back to hunt you down!"
My eyes watered, and my anger only skyrocketed. I was showing him that I cared, and I hated myself for it.
He took my hand and kissed the back of it, "don't worry, he's -"
His phone rang, scaring me a little. He pulled out his burner phone, answered the call, and put it on speaker.
"Chief Randall, what do I owe the pleasure?"
"I'm at the crime scene," Chief Randall whispered. "Please tell me the path of blood on the ground is his and not yours."
"It's mine. Asshole shot me twice."
"Holy shit, are you okay?"
"Yeah, don't worry. One less bad guy on the street. I'll text you the coordinates of where his body is."
Adam looked at me, and I shake my head and sat beside him.
"Alright, thanks again, Adam. We'll be in touch."
"Alright, Chief."
"Oh, and tell Ryan I said hi."
I rolled my eyes while Adam gave an amused smile, "will do."
He hung up the phone and tossed it on the bed behind us.
"Who was it?" I asked.
"Kenny Matthews."
"Oh, shit," my heart broke.
"Come on," Adam scoffed. "Dudes been terrorizing the streets for years. Forcing kids to be apart of his drug ring. The world's better off without him."
"I don't disagree," I sighed. "It's just . . . his mom comes to get her hair done in the shop every two weeks. He's the only family she's got."
"Yeah," he nodded sadly. "If it makes it any better, he didn't suffer."
"Hm, but you did," I gave him the side-eye.
"I've had worse."
"I know," I stood from the bed. "You should rest. I'll set you up on the couch."
"Thanks."
"Mhm," I replied, feeling his gaze on me until I left out of the room.
After getting some blankets from the linen closet, I went into the living room and made his bed on the couch. In the midst, there was a knock on the door.
I went over and looked into the peephole to see my boyfriend, Chris.
"Ryan, you there?" he asked from the other side of the door.
"Chris, what are you doing here?" I asked. "It's late."
"I know, I know. I just missed you."
"We were just on a date a few hours ago," I said without thinking. "Wait, I didn't mean it like that -"
"No, no, it's okay. I get it, it's late, and I just showed up. I'd just thought I'd come over, and maybe we could hang out if you know what I mean."
I sighed softly, leaning my head against the door. This was the last thing I needed.
"Look, Ryan, I know you said you needed to go slow because you're still having a hard time getting over Adam. But I've been thinking, and how can you ever get over him, if you don't let me in?"
"Chris, I hear you, I do, but this isn't a good time. You really should have called."
All of a sudden, Chris went silent.
"Chris?" I looked into the peephole to see him standing there.
"He's in there with you? Isn't he?"
My heart sank to the floor.
"You have to trust me, Chris, this isn't what it looks like. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"
Once again, there was silence.
"Chris?"
I looked into the peephole, only this time he wasn't there.
"Shit," I groaned, leaning my forehead against the door.
Was my luck really this bad?
I couldn't deal with this right now. I would just have to call and explain everything to him tomorrow.
I turn around, and standing by the couch is Adam with the wedding dress magazine in his hand.
"Are you serious?" he asked, his eyes full of hurt.
"Don't make a big deal out of it," I walked over and snatched the magazine out his hand. "We've only talked about it."
"You've been dating for two months."
"And we've known each other for a lot longer," I shrugged. "What's your point? You know what, Adam, screw your point. We're not together, your opinion doesn't matter and I don't have to answer to you anymore."
"So, that's how it is?"
"Yeah," I smiled in his face and nodded. "That's how it is. So, you're welcome and good night."
He pulls me back by the arm, "you don't love him, you know you don't. So why are you wasting his time? Is it to spite me?"
"Spite you?" I scoffed. "Adam, not everything is about you. For once, my life isn't about you. It's about me and what I need."
"You need me."
"No, Adam, I want you, but I don't need you!"
The moment my voice raised, Winston came running out of the room, barking at us.
"There's a difference. I want to be with you until the day I die, I want to be the mother of your children but what I don't need, is you coming home all beaten up, full of bullet holes, like this is a god damn hospital."
"Ryan -"
"That's not the future I want for me or my kids!"
"Don't you get it? I'm saving lives. I'm getting bad guys off the street. Doing what cops can't do lawfully."
"See, that's the problem," I tossed the magazine across the room. "That's all you think about, Adam! Taking down bad guys, but what about me, huh? What about how I'm going to feel when I learn that some criminals got you before you got him. No one trusts you. There's targets on your back. People are waiting to get a piece of you. You think you've got it all under control but what about when you meet your match, huh?! What am I supposed to do when I get that call that you're . . ."
My voice broke, and the tears fell before I could stop them.
"Ryan," he reaches out to me.
"No! Adam!" I pulled back. "No! I'm not doing this with you. Yeah, you're right, I don't love Chris. But Chris is smart, and he's nice, and he listens, and he always takes me into account in everything that he does and everything that he wants to do. I know that he's not going to show up on my doorstep, bleeding out. He's safe, and he'd make a damn good father. I might have to learn to love him, but in the end, it would be worth it."
"Would it?" Adam's eyes watered. "Or is that the lie you tell yourself?"
I wiped my eyes, letting out a scoff, "you know what, next time, don't come here. Go to a hospital, find another chick who wants to be play nurse, I don't know, and I don't care, just don't come here."
I brushed past him and a barking Winston, making my way to my room.
"Ryan!" he called after me.
"Leave the key on the table," was the last thing I said before slamming my bedroom door shut.
I leaned my back against the door and slid to the floor, erupting in sobs.
* * * * *
Guys . . . I think I'm gonna do a part two for this one! Tell me what you think!