Jayden shrugged as a smirk spread over his face. I instinctively wrapped my arms around my waist, hugging my stomach in a way that wouldn't be too obvious, protecting my shrimp. But what did it matter if Jayden had told Kennedy anyway?
"When'd you two become best friends?" I pouted at them.
"N-never!" Kennedy stuttered.
"Just talking about fifty shades of grey..." Jayden smirked and shot me an overly fatuous look.
I blushed intensely. The last time I used that as an excuse we'd been talking about our shrimp. My stomach fluttered at the words our and I blushed even harder. It was unfair how emotional I got about everything. Was Jayden hinting that he told Kennedy? I gave him a wide-eyed look and he just shook his head, but I wasn't convinced. Kennedy was an awkward guy but he'd never been this awkward before. I frowned, something was off about both of them.
"So what did professor Perkins say?" Kennedy asked, avoiding my suspicious gaze.
"He just told me to stop falling asleep in class or he'd mark me as absent..." I grumbled. My arms were still wrapped around my waist and I sighed, feeling guilty that I couldn't give my baby shrimp what it needed.
"He did WHAT?" Jayden growled. I looked up at him, surprised to see him going from smug to raging in such a short moment. "Why didn't you tell him that you're-"
"That I have insomnia?" I snapped at him, staring daggers into his very soul. How careless could this man get? How dumb could one be? And to think that he was studying biomedical engineering? What a joke! "Jayden, you barely know me so get out of my face..." I growled. "It's none of your business..."
The anger in Jayden's eyes went out like a light. His face looked empty, broken. My words had completely thrown him out of character and he stood next to Kennedy, staring straight through me. He looked so sad.
"Sorry... that was a bit harsh..." I yelped. Jayden just stared.
"It's fine... you're right... I don't know you." He mumbled. "Whatever's going on in your life really isn't my business, is it? I'll leave you alone for now..." His voice cracked and he started walking away.
"Jayden!" I called, grabbing his hand. He yanked it away.
"Didn't you just tell me to get out of your face?" He shot back at me, sending me a threatening look as if to say 'don't try your luck'.
"I'm sorry... I didn't mean it like that..." I frowned as he sighed. Wasn't I supposed to be the one who got easily upset? "Don't go..."
"Do you want me to stay or leave, Micah? You can't tell me to get out of your face and then ask me to stay..." he grumbled. For some reason, I felt as if his question had more depth then he showed. As if he was asking me if I wanted him to stay or leave forever.
"I want you to stay..." I whimpered. His arm twitched when a tear ran down my cheek, he obviously wanted to wipe it.
"How about I stay when you tell your admirer your little secret..." He said lowly in a somewhat hurt tone as he looked at my stomach. I couldn't help but throw my hands over it, hiding my flat stomach in my embrace. Jayden hesitantly reached for my waist but quickly pulled his hand back. "Text me when he knows..."
Jayden walked off, leaving me staring at his back as he made his way to his car.
"So Mr. Perkins just scolded you?" Kennedy asked, breaking the silence.
I turned to him and nodded. Kennedy looked so innocent and pure. Withering guilt filled my chest. He deserved to know, right? My face heated up as I looked into his eyes. He was blushing too. I felt like a schoolgirl about to confess. Except this confession wasn't the one I knew he was hoping for. Dread filled my body like poison. I trembled. Who wouldn't be timorous in a situation like this?
"Let's go get some food..." I mumbled.
⚥ ⚥ ⚥
Seated at a cheap grill place a few blocks away from the campus, I nervously nibbled at some fries. Kennedy scrolled through his phone, reading something. His attention was far away which gave me an excuse to further withhold my confession. I was getting cold feet. Literally and metaphorically. I glutted the small potato strips, drenching them in different dressings as I hectically chewed. I was chickening out.
"Uh... Micah..?" Kennedy stuttered. I shot him a deadly glare as I chewed the potatoes in my mouth. I was definitely not ready for his reaction. He suddenly laughed, catching me off guard. "I'm not gonna steal your fries..." He laughed. I looked down and found myself holding the small trey of fries against my chest and blushed. Gosh, what was happening to me? "Is everything okay with Jayden?"
I stiffened, freezing in the chair. "No..." I whimpered, surprising myself with the response. "I feel like I seriously hurt his feelings and I'm not even sure how..."
We stayed silent. Kennedy didn't say anything else, probably not wanting to know. It made me feel guilty. Kennedy obviously had a crush on me, the guy couldn't look at me without blushing or smiling or awkwardly stuttering. But Kennedy was just Kennedy. Just a friend. But then what was Jayden? Wasn't Jayden just a friend? And we slept together... twice. I found myself glancing at Kennedy, blushing as I thought of what Jayden had once said. 'I could go for a threesome with you and Mr scrawny' my stomach fluttered. Maybe giving it a go would be... "No!" I yelled at myself. "That's not what we came here for!"
The restaurant silenced. People turned to look at me and I found myself blushing all the way up to my ears. Kennedy looked a bit weirded out a first until he started laughing.
"What the fuck?" He laughed.
I hid my face in my hands. I felt dizzy and weak. Not nauseated though so that was a plus. "I have to tell you something..." I slowly began.
"What's up?"
My hands fell onto my lap, eyes closed. I really didn't want to say it. "I'm... I'm pregnant..."
Kennedy's eyes widened and he arched his brows in disbelief. "What?" He stuttered. I couldn't tell if he hadn't heard me or if he was just confused.
"I'm pregnant..." I repeated as my face heated up.
"Yeah, I heard you the first time..." Kennedy awkwardly chuckled. "But like what do you mean..?"
I clenched my fists. This oblivious asshole. How much more obvious could I be? "There's a fucking baby in my fucking stomach..." I growled.
"Like a food baby?"
I wanted to slam my head onto the table. "No..." I said rather aggressively. "There's an actual human baby growing inside my stomach..."
"How..?" Kennedy awkwardly laughed. "Are you trans or secretly a girl or something?" I could tell that he was getting nervous. I felt bad for him in a sense. He was really having a hard time accepting it. The sudden urge to punch him came over me and I quickly shut the idea down in my head.
"Have you ever... Uh... heard the term 'intersex'?" I mumbled, just loud enough for him to hear.
"Yeah..." Kennedy said. His voice was shaky.
"I'm intersexual..." I almost whispered. I knew he could hear me though because he had leaned closer to hear me better after I mumbled the first part.
"Which means..?"
"I uh..." I swallowed. This was awkward. We were best friends, after all, he'd understand. "I'm both male and female I guess..." my voice was getting quieter with every sentence. Kennedy honestly looked hurt. In fact, he looked heartbroken. My fingers itched. "K-Kennedy..?" I stuttered.
"And you're serious? Promise me that you're not fucking around..." He mumbled. His voice was shaky.
"I'm serious..."
He stopped supporting his head, letting it fall down so it hung in front of him like a dead man. "Why..." He whispered. What? Why what? "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't tell anyone..." I whimpered. I was tearing up. I silently swore to myself as I aggressively rubbed the tears out of my eyes.
"Jayden's the dad, huh? That's why he's been chasing after you..."
I didn't want to answer. It was embarrassing.
"Why him?" Kennedy said as he raised his head. His eyes were red. "Why him, Micah?"
"What do you mean?" I stuttered. My heartbeat was spreading up like an accelerating animal.
"Why him and not me..?"
I heard my patience snapping in my head like a rubber band. That's what he was thinking about? He was thinking about getting into my pants after I told him my biggest secret? My mouth formed a thin, strained line over my face. "Are you fucking serious?" I spat. My legs moved on their own and I rushed out of the shabby restaurant. When I was outside I heard Kennedy coming after me and I was tempted to run until I felt his hand tightly grip my wrist.
"Don't do that!" He said harshly. "Don't leave me without answers like that!"
"I just fucking told you about my biggest insecurity and what the fuck do you do?! You ask why I didn't sleep with you instead of Jayden Marston?!"
"What does he have that I don't?!"
"Respect for me!" I yelled and yanked my arm away from Kennedy. He'd never raised his voice at me before. Not even once. He latched onto my arm again but I was stronger than him and easily snatched it back.
"I do respect you! Well, at least I did before I found out you go around spreading your legs!"
I completely froze as I looked at him. His face was rough and stern, scrunched up with anger. Disgusting. He looked disgusting. What did I ever see in him? Why did I ever think we could be friends in the first place? We were different in every way possible. My balled up fists were twitching with rage. I couldn't even begin to fathom what he'd just said. My legs were threatening to give in under me as my vision clouded with dizziness and anger. I stood there, eyes closed while Kennedy stood in front of me outside the restaurant. My body seemed to take control and I swung my fist in his direction, missing his face by an inch as he jolted backwards.
"You're such a fucking asshole..." I cried as I looked at his shocked face. Before walked off I spat on the ground in front of him. "Who knew such filth could hide behind that facade of yours?" I growled.
⚥ ⚥ ⚥
I took the bus home, sitting in the back to avoid any eye contact while I cried. I had texted Jayden and told him that I was coming over to his place and that I wanted him to be ready with all the fucking sex toys he had.
I got off at the bus stop closest to the house he lived in and walked with determination toward the front door. I knocked and after a while, a tall guy whom I think was named Chris opened the door. He looked at me for a few seconds before my face registered in his head. "Oh... hi Mi...chael..?" He tried.
"Micah.," I corrected him and he gave me a sorry nod before inviting me in.
"Hi, princess!" Joey, the Hispanic guy who opened the door last time yelled at me and waved. "Prince Naveen's upstairs!"
"Thanks..." I mumbled. As I walked up the stairs I kept my head held down to avoid eye contact with anyone. That would've been awkward since it was obvious that I had been bawling my eyes out.
As I made it up the stairs another one of Jayden's roommates passed me and nodded. "Oi! Prince Charming! Your princess is here!" He called before ruffling my hair as he walked past me down the stairs. I looked back at him in confusion as he strutted down to the other guys and scrunched my nose. Who did he think he was? He couldn't just ruffle my hair like I was some kind of kid, let alone call me 'princess'.
Without further thought, I burst into Jayden's neatly cleaned room and threw myself onto him where he sat on the bed. He called out in surprise as I connected our lips, straddled him as my vision clouded with tears again.
"Micah- Stop..." He said between gasps as I pushed him down. My tears were streaming down my cheeks and landing on his face.
"Please just fuck me..." I sniffled. "Hard..." I tried to unbuckle his pants as I sniffled, wiping away the tears as they kept coming.
"Micah, stop," Jayden said sternly.
"Please..." I cried and pulled his jeans down while unbuttoning my own, kicking them off as I tried to pull Jayden's off.
"Micah, fucking stop!" He yelled, suddenly grabbing a hold of my wrists and tackling me down on his bed with a strong pull. Jayden was much stronger than me and as he placed a leg on either side of me I had no chance of wiggling loose.
I met Jayden's piercing grey eyes, his curly black hair dangling from his head as he looked down at me and as he did, felt myself calm down under him. The tears were still flowing as if my eyes were waterfalls and I sniffled as he held me down. "He was so mean, Jayden..." I cried.
"Kennedy? What'd he do?" Jayden growled. His calm composure was replaced with a tense angry one that he was obviously trying to control.
"He said I go around spreading my legs..." I felt my heart aching as I remembered the wild, disgusted look on his face. Jayden's grip around my wrists tightened greatly as he took a deep breath. A grip so hard that I whimpered in pain.
He suddenly pulled me up and into a tight hug on the bed. "I'm sorry you had to hear that..." He whispered as he rubbed my back soothingly. I let my arms snake around his neck as I straddled him again, this time only for hugging him. I wrapped my legs around the lower part of his waist, right by his hips as I buried my face by his neck.
"Sorry for jumping you like that..."
"It's fine... although you can't just make all your problems disappear just by fucking them off, okay?" He said against the back of my neck. His breath was hot and it sent shivers down my spine. "I know that it's a good way to forget about things but it's not a very healthy way of dealing with problems now, is it?"
"But it's the only thing that works..." I mumbled.
"No, it's not..." Jayden whispered and placed a soft kiss on my neck. I felt him stiffening underneath me and I arched my back slightly.
"Just this once..? Please?" I pleaded. Jayden seemed hesitant but there was no denying that he was turned on too.
"I can't turn you down you little bastard..." He said huskily through a faint moan as in pressed myself against his erection.
I was flipped back down on my back as Jayden bit his lip, smirking at my blushing face.
"Fuck, you're adorable..." He groaned as he slipped my briefs off.