Before I continue the story, let's flash back a bit
It won't take so long, I promise
Don't you guys want to know what is in Puen's mind?
So, let's appreciate him to let us know about what he thought about everything
Then, here we go . . . .
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Puen POV
"Goodnight, Than"
I leave him. Maybe he will feel dumbfounded because what I just did to him. At first, I didn't have intention to kiss him but it turned, I couldn't help myself to do it. That is the only way to shut this chatty boy mouth. That is the only thing that can seal his mouth from asking too many questions.
I leave him there. It is past midnight now but I can't ask him to stay. Not now, when I can't stop my heart for beating so fast. If I let him in, how can I make my heart calm down? It will make me can't sleep all night long. Just not inviting him in and did kiss him, my heart is being like this. I bet it will take times before I can calm down and go to sleep. This is the first time I am being like this and he is the one who caused me being like this.
Him.
I never thought he will cause me so much trouble, make my life ups and down and sometime spins like a roller coaster.
I touch my heart. Still beating so fast.
"Feel like you are going to die because of him, Puen" I speak to myself.
At first, I only found him as annoying brat who is having big mouth with no skill. I have no interest on him at all. He didn't get any respects from me but he gain hate. Maybe not hate. Let's call it anger. Yes, he made me angry. Every time I saw him, he always made me mad.
First, because he mentioned about he didn't get accepted by St. Sebastian volley team. He seemed like he was mocking at us, our team. Like we are the side option when he didn't made to his first option. Like hell.
Then, he got same number as my previous partner, Singha. And top of that, he is the setter. Same as Singha potition when he left us to move to St. Sebastian.
Quarrel. That is the only thing that always happened between us. But it suddenly changed when I overheard his conversation with his father and saw him cried. Since then, step by step I have been changed toward him. I never played favoritism but I taken care of him in a hard way. Always made him suffer from hard training. It is because I wanted him to improve his skill and he did. He proved to me he could do what I challenged him. And without I realized, I got closer to him and he become a part of my life.
He made me forget the feeling that I had for Singha. Tell the truth, I had a crush on him and when he moved to St. Sebastian to pursue his dream, I felt betrayed. He was the first person who understands me but yet he did the same thing as my parent did to me. He left me when I trusted him so much. He was more than a best friend for me. He is more than that. That is why I never can forgive him.
Than.
He suddenly replaced him in my heart but I always deny it. I tried to refuse my feeling for him because I didn't want to get hurt. Because I still wanted Singha to comeback but it never happened. Yes, sometime he showed up but he acted so close to Than and a part of me didn't like the way he got close to him.
Jealous? I thought so. I was so jealous of him. I didn't want him to steal him from me. Not like when he stole my heart then broke it to pieces. Now, when my heart got healed, I didn't want he broke it again. I didn't want him steal the reason why my heart is healed.
I did my best to show an affection to Than but I admit myself if I am not that type person who can bluntly say cheesy words or show affection. I did it by my way. I am not a good at saying words nor I good at showing affection gesture. I just, I did it by my own way.
Force.
Yeah, maybe I did some forced to him that he didn't get I was being affectionate to him. I did many thing with him that considered as a date. Had dinner together or me just slept on his laps. Although they were happened because I forced him, but it is still be considered as a date. Right?
And we have been kissed. Many times. I remembered when I gave him my first kiss. I didn't have intention to do it at first but my body moved itself. I didn't regret I lost my first kiss to him. But when Leng asked me why I kissed him, I said I didn't know. Well, I still didn't know why I did that. You don't need a reason to kiss someone you like, right? Maybe I started to like him at that time. And now, it is not just a like. It is more than that. I think I love him. He makes me fall in love.
Than.
Him.
He is a smart boy but he is not smart enough to read atmosphere between us. He can't understand the feeling I have for him. He is so dense. But I find it is cute and I like to tease him because of that. Maybe what I did made him confuse about my behavior. I didn't clear enough to say what he is to me. I didn't clear enough say what I am feeling for him.
I want to but I can't put it in words. The words are on the edge of my mouth but it is hard to spit it out. It is like my mouth got sealed when I am trying to tell him. Why it is hard for me just to say it?
I love him.
I want to say that but I couldn't. I can't. I always stop when that words on the edge of my tongue.
I love you, Than.
I hope I have courage to say it to him. To confess.
"Who is his man?"
I know they are referred it to me but I just play dumb. And that the boy I was talking about, looking surprise. I like the way he looks at me with a surprise look. Maybe he doesn't know if what he said at that night really made me realized if what I did was wrong and now I am here is trying to fix my wrongdoing.
Everyone is surprise to see me here. My mates too.
"Miss me?" I ask everyone but my eyes are looking at him. Personally, I am asking him if he does miss me or not but I guess my expression doesn't show what I want to show. Sometime I regret to have flat expression. The only expression I can really show is when I am angry.
I can't be so open to him. Not now. Maybe after the game, I will try to confess about my feeling. Me. Him. I want them to be us.
*****
Singha POV
Wake up from long sleep, I am still feeling tired. I just wanna lay on and do nothing but seeing the person who is staring at me with beautiful teary eyes, makes me don't want do it but stay as long that person is satisfied looking at me. I don't want make him sad any longer. I don't want to be the reason why the tears are running down to his beautiful face. It was my fault because I did make him worried and maybe sometime he cried when I was slept. But right now, I don't want to make some mistake again. Not when I know I have a chance to change everything to be better.
"Don't you feel enough for looking my face? Do you that craving for seeing my handsome face?"
"Joke again, I will send you to hell!"
"So stop looking at me" I reach his head with my hands. Pull it to face me. "And let me to see your handsome face instead"
He blushes but still let me do it. I know he feels awkward or maybe nervous but he doesn't mad when I do it to him. He just makes his eyes not to meet my eyes.
"Do you know how much I miss to look at your face?" He doesn't answer, "You are handsome as always"
"Such a sweet tongue. This is how you make everyone falls for you, huh?"
"So, do you fall for me?" He looks at me.
"It is not working on me" He looks so serious about it, "Beside, don't you look for someone else? Your old friend or your favorite Nong?"
"Why would I look for them if the one I want to see the most is here right now?"
"They are worried about you. You should call them"
"Did you worry about me?" He doesn't answer again instead he asks me to let him go but I am not doing what he please, "Didn't you here if I won't let you go? I mean it" He looks at me again, now with a serious face. Like he just realizes what I meant.
"Why?" He asks with a really a low voice.
"You really don't know the answer?" He is silent, "Should I show it the reason why I am like this to you?"
Without waiting him to answer, I lean my face to his. Closer and getting closer every inch. I tilt my face and then touch his lips with mine. I don't know what expression he shows. Shock, surprise or disgusted. I don't know which one he feels right now but something for sure, he doesn't push me away. He just stays still and I am too. Not force him to open his mouth and let me savor him. I really want to suck and bite his lips but I restrain myself not being too force toward him. I love him and I want him to feel the way I feel for him.
No reaction. So, I push myself and let go. Look at him who is just staring blankly to me.
"Now you know. This is the reason" He still not says anything, "I like you, Petch"
"I need to go!" He stands up and ready to leave but before he can do that, I grab his hand and stop him.
"Don't run away before you respond it"
"How should I respond? I am not ready for this" He says, "I always prepare myself for getting rejected, yet this happens. How should I react?"
A smile is painting on my face. Never thought he will be like this. I mean, I know we have mutual feeling for each other but hearing those words from him, doesn't he look so cute? How could he prepare himself for getting rejected when my feeling for him is stronger as storm?
"Don't give me that ugly smile of yours"
"Why? Don't I look so handsome?" He is faking like he wanna puke.
I pull him and make him fall, sit on the bed. His back touches my chest. I trap him between my arms. Lock him in it. Back hug him.
"Let me go!"
"Nope. I will never let you go" I tell him, "Don't you know how hard things I have faced to reach this moment? Finally I can reach you, why I have to let you go? You are mine now, Petch!"
"Don't you have shame? What if people see us?" He says, "And who said I am yours?"
"If someone sees us, just let them see how two teenagers are being in love. Just make them jealous of us. And you are mine. It is decided!"
"How so?"
"Because you like me too. And I love you. Now we are a couple. Boyfriends"
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I won't say anything but give you a bonus
Than
Petch
Enjoy the view everyone ;-)