it surprised me when matt didn't try to talk to me during the entire week. zac came over and i told him everything. he understood my side and also defended matt, saying that i needed to understand him too if i wanted him to pick my side, not my mother's. however, i wasn't going to talk to him first, even though he was right, he insulted and made me feel upset. matt needed to know that he has some boundaries, regardless of our long-term friendship, he couldn't call me stupid and selfish the way he did. i just wish he could understand that.
the next thing i did, was to call my father, so he could guide me or something. he told me that he didn't know much about my mother's affair, but if i wanted to keep digging, he was going to help if i needed anything. today was sunday, and i decided to call brandon, asking him to find carina because we needed to talk. now it was the three of us talking via facetime. "she said that?" carina asked with her mouth full.
"yeah, and then me and matt had a huge fight." i sighed, laying down on the couch after washing the dishes that i used to cook my food. i told them about our fight, with every detail.
"wow, that wasn't... necessary." brandon frowned. "did you talk to him after?"
"no, it has been a week that i haven't heard of him." i explained. "but that's not the point, i mean, i'm worried about my situation with mom."
"do you want my opinion? i mean, like my really, really honest opinion?" carina put down her fork to pay full attention at our conversation.
"that's why i called you." i rolled over to be laid on my stomach.
"stop looking for him," i raised my eyebrows, not expecting her to say that. "like, i know that this whole story is really fucked up, but mom's telling you the truth, so you should listen to her."
"we know it's hard because you feel like, well, she lied for all these years, why wouldn't she be lying now?" brandon added and i nodded. "but we all know mom, she wouldn't be capable of inventing this story just because she doesn't want you to find out about an affair she had 23 years ago."
"i understand that," i took a deep breath. "but you guys have no idea of how fucked up this is, and i mean to really have an idea about it." i bit my bottom lip. "of how devastating it is to not know who your real father is, the horrible feeling to discover that your entire family has been lying to you for years."
"we can only imagine." carina mumbled. "but... maybe it's better to leave it like this, don't you think?"
"i don't want to." i whined. "i just wanna know the truth, and i'm talking about the whole truth, to hear everyone's side of the story."
brandon sighed, rubbing his eyes with his palms. "are you sure about this?"
"i am, i promise you i am." i nodded.
"then fucking do it." brandon shrugged.
"yeah, everyone warned you, so now you'll be doing it at your own risks." carina added, making me groan.
while i was answering her, someone knocked on my door. "it's probably zac."
"don't hang up! i want to see him!" carina grinned and i rolled my eyes, getting up.
i opened the door, shocked to find david standing there. he was wearing a grey shirt today, with his glasses on, a chipotle hat covering the mess that his hair looked and a starbucks cup on his hand. "hey, i didn't know you were coming." i frowned, putting my phone down.
"i brought your favorite!" he gave me a goofy smile, showing me the cup. "plain black coffee with no sugar."
"who's that?" i heard brandon's voice, widening my eyes.
"who are you talking to?" david asked, stepping in and closing the door behind himself.
"it's just my siblings," i looked at my phone. "sorry guys, gotta zayn."
"wait!" carina squealed before i could hang up. "is it that david guy?" she asked excitedly.
david raised his eyebrows at me, making me blush. "can we see him?" brandon suggested.
i was about to hang up for the second time and david stole the phone from me. "hi, i'm david!" he said to them, waving to the phone. "so, angie talks about me?"
"oh god." i murmured, trying to grab my phone back.
"she does, a lot actually." brandon said giggling.
"she even told us about your kiss the other day." carina said and i panicked, using all my strength to steal my phone from david's hand.
"fuck you guys." i said, hanging up. "i'm sorry about this." i was red like a tomato, god, how awkward.
david, however, was giggling. "aw, look at you, all embarrassed because your sister exposed you." he cooed, trying to wrap his arms around my waist, but i quickly stepped away, going to lay down on my bed, leaving the cup of coffee on my nightstand.
i covered my face with the duvet. "shut up." i whined.
"come on, martis, that was sweet." i heard him getting closer to the bed. "you're talking about me to your family." he teased, making me groan.
"please, stop, or i will die in embarrassment." i informed, earning a loud laugh from him. then, i felt him getting on my bed, and he snatched the duvet away from my face. "what?"
he leaned in and kissed both of my cheeks, making me giggle. "i like to tease you, martis."
i tilted my head to the side, taking his hat off and his glasses, leaving it beside us, and resting my hands on his shoulder "i've noticed that." i mumbled, running my hand through his hair, to fix his messy curls.
david buried his face in the crook of my neck, laying all his weight on top of me. "you smell so good." he mumbled.
"thank you." i frowned, playing with his hair, twirling a strand with my fingers. "i like your suave kids shampoo too, strawberry right?"
david chuckled against my neck, making me shiver. he noticed that and pressed his hand on my waist, rubbing my now exposed skin, since i moved on the mattress. "yes, how did you know it's suave kids?"
"i saw it in your bathroom." i giggled. "i even read the fun fact just because i'm curious."
"what did it say?" he asked.
"uh... that an octopus doesn't have any bones so it can fit in very tight places." he looked up at me, shifting a little to the side so he wouldn't be laying entirely on top of me. "which is really useless and very, very obvious."
"it's a kids shampoo, calm down." david chuckled.
"but is irrelevant!" i protested.
"oh, angie, you're so boring!" he groaned and i slapped his arm. "by the way, you forgot to drink your coffee, it's probably cold now."
"shit." i sat up straight and leaned over david's body to reach the cup.
"you're literally with your boobs on my face." he said between giggles, making me blush.
i readjusted myself, sitting beside him. "sorry." i took a sip from the coffee. "god, it's horrible." i put it back.
"you have your nipples pierced." david commented, excited. i gasped, widening my eyes and covering my chest with my arms when i remembered that i wasn't wearing a bra. "i noticed on our first date, but i thought it was the shirt, but now that you put them on my face, i could take a great look at them." i hit him in the arm. "can i see it?" he grasped my wrist.
"of course not!" he pouted, loosening his grip. feeling like i was a little harsh with him, i tried to change the mood of our conversation. "i mean, not like this," i giggled. "maybe in an other occasion, a more special one."
david expression quickly changed with my comment, wetting his lips. "i'll keep that in mind." and he brought my hand closer to his lips, kissing my knuckles gently. when he let go of me, i rested my palm on his cheek, rubbing his skin with my thumb.
we stayed in silence for a few minutes, just staring into each other's eyes and enjoying the moment we were having. as always, it felt good to be with him, just sharing the silence, feeling like nothing was wrong, that everything was just perfect.
it was impressive the way me and him bonded since i stepped inside his house. just like i told carly and erin, david sort of cracked me open with the first words he spoke, and that never happened to me. he got closer, showed me, in such a short period, that it was okay to get out of my comfort zone sometimes, because that's what he was always doing to me every time we saw each other. he made me shoot someone with a paintball gun, made me wrestle with him on the grass, tear his house apart because of an egg hunt, almost killed me with a prank, and a lot of other stuff.
the thing is, with matt, it was never like this, it was always so soft, but with david... i felt like a whole new person, i felt like i was being myself, being the person that i was hiding inside of me, just waiting for the right person to show. david was that person. david was the person who manage to put a smile on my face every time he opened his mouth, that made me laugh with the smallest things, that made me feel at peace, at home. since the first time i saw him, i felt something that i've had never felt in my entire life. it was a good feeling. the feeling that we were supposed to be more than friends, and i knew that for a long time now, i just didn't admit it to anyone. "do you know something fun we could do?" i said, having an amazing idea.
"what?" he rested his body weight on his elbows.
"i could draw you, like you promised me." i bit my bottom lip. "if the promise is still up, of course."
david stopped to think for a couple of seconds before nodding. "yeah, sure."
a big smile appeared on my face. "yay!" i clapped my hands together. "i promise you it won't take long, it's just a sketch." i said getting up to get my stuff.
"i thought you were painting me." david got up too to follow my steps.
"it will look way more cool if i made a sketch." i shrugged, grabbing my pencil and a notebook that i used to make my sketches. "shall we?"
"show me the way." i nodded, opening the door to my balcony. it was a warm day and the sunlight was illuminating the place perfectly. i love to come here outside at this time.
"okay, i really like my view, so i thought it would look nice to draw you here outside." i started to explain. "i want you to sit here," he did, his back facing me. "it will look good because of the view peaking from the wood pallets, you know?"
"yeah, i think it will." david chuckled as i sat down too, leaning against the glass door behind me.
i began my drawing, starting with him. "it would look pretty cool with water color," i said, erasing a feel lines. "but i need to buy more, since me and zac paint a lot when we are bored." david laughed softly. "he promised to buy me more, but we all know he won't." i kept rambling, david quiet just listening to my unnecessary comments. then, i huffed, looking at the drawing, feeling like it wasn't looked good. i'd erased his body shape at least three times since i started to ramble.
"is everything okay?" david asked, turning his head to the side to look at me.
"it's not right." i mumbled, ripping the paper to throw it away. "it's like... there's something missing, i need more." i tried to explain, quickly having an idea. "i have a suggestion."
"which it is?" he leaned back on his hands.
"would you mind... doing it shirtless?" my voice went out in a whisper, afraid of how he would react.
david looked away from my gaze. "i don't like being shirtless around people." he confessed. "it's uncomfortable... because i don't really like my body to show it." i raised my eyebrows. "only a few of my friends saw me without a shirt on."
"oh... i mean, it's a suggestion, we won't do it if you don't feel comfortable." i shrugged, even though he wasn't looking. "but it's just me," i moved to get closer to him. "i won't judge you, if that's what you worried about... besides, no one will see this drawing, or i can make in a way that no one will recognize you." i wrapped my arms around him. "if it is because of chest hair, don't worry, it's just body hair, i don't care." david chuckled, shaking his head. i took a deep breath, making a bold move. "i'll let you see my pierced nipples." i whispered in his ear, playing low and leaving a kiss behind it.
david tilted his head to the side, smiling. "when?"
"soon." i kissed his neck because it looked so inviting, making him sigh. "what do you think about that?"
"it's a very nice trade, actually." he looked at me.
"so what? are you in?" i asked, taking my hands away from him.
david stood up and so did i. "let's do it." he shrugged, grabbing the hem of his shirt. he looked hesitant, so i put my hands on top of his, to take the lead, pushing his shirt up, taking it off and leaving it on the table beside us. i dared to look down at his chest, running my hands up on his skin, feeling a few of his chest hair against my palm, stopping on his neck.
"you're beautiful... just as i suspected." i mumbled, leaving a quick peck on his collarbone that was visible.
i looked up, really wanting to kiss him, but not feeling like this was the right moment. even though this was a very intimate moment, i decided to let it happen in a more special time. david seemed to think the same as me, because he leaned in and kissed my forehead before we went back to my drawing.