July 11, 2018
Tampa, FL
@MalaikaAnoai: Good morning everyone! @WWERomanReigns and I have a huge announcement to make today.
@WWERomanReigns: I will post one announcement here on my Twitter and my beautiful wife will make our other announcement on Instagram live tonight at 6 pm Eastern time.
Joe made the announcement that we're having twins by posting this picture
And now it's time for the two of us to make a small but kind of big announcement.
"Are you ready for this?" Joe asks me. I nod. I prop my phone up and the two of us check each other to make sure we look good. Obviously. I open Instagram and start a live stream.
"Hello everyone! It now time to make our announcement." I look at Joe.
"I was at Raw this past Monday and Mark Carrano came to me about an idea he wanted my family and I to do..."
"And as soon as I heard it, I said yes right away." I say.
"So the big announcement is that we're doing a family vlog." I smile.
"I'm so excited. Finally our fans can see what it's like with Anoa'i family."
"Daddy!" Anjali yells off camera. "I need you!"
"Shh!" Joelle says. "They're busy."
"Be right back." Joe gets up and goes to the girls.
"So we're still working out the kinks so hopefully this little project will be up and running very soon." I look down in the comments to answer some questions.
How long will you do the vlogs?
"Um right now we're not exactly sure how long. But I know we want to keep it up until the babies are born."
How often will you post?
"We don't want to put a definite time, like once a week or twice a week just in case we can't fulfill it."
I'm really excited for this! I know the fans miss you.
"Aw thanks, I miss you guys too."
So what exactly will you vlog about?
"Joe and I were thinking daily life with the kids and then Joe can take the camera on the road. We may do the little challenges you see on YouTube, Q and A's. Stuff like that."
Why did you agree to do it?
"Well we try to keep our life kind of private, especially Joe, so we want to open ourselves up. We did do video recordings while I was pregnant with Anjali and now we can do it with the twins. This is also a chance for us to put ourselves out there just in case I don't get on Total Divas."
Will your videos be on WWE's YouTube page?
"No. We got clearance for this page to be our own. It will have ties to WWE obviously but it'll be our own thing."
I'm so glad that you and Roman get to do this. You guys deserve the attention.
"I really appreciate that."
The Miz and Maryse pop out one kid and they get a whole TV show. You guys have 5. It's about time your family gets some recognition.
"Preach it a little louder for the people in the back." I laugh. Joe comes back and sits down. "Anything you wanna add hot stuff?" Joe shakes his head.
"You pretty much covered it. Anything else, we'll put in the vlogs." He says.
"So with that being said, thank you guys for watching and we can't wait to see your reception." I turn the live stream off and sigh. "Welp there it is. The point of no return."
"You're being dramatic. We can always turn back. We could say that we're too busy raising 5 kids."
"No, no. I want to do this. It'll be fun. I know you're not much of a "hold the camera and talk about stuff" kind of dude so this could be a learning experience."
"This could be fun." He says.
X
July 12, 2018
Tampa, FL
With Joelle at camp and Galina getting ready for her photoshoot Saturday, that leaves Joe, Anjali, Mark and myself to go buy our vlog cameras one for home and the other for Joe to take on the road.
I come downstairs in a shirt dress, ready to go.
"Um, excuse me." Joe says. "Are you wearing shorts under there?"
"... no... Just a thong."
"Oh no. Shorts please."
"Why? My cheeks aren't hanging out."
"Your bump and your huge butt makes the dress rise." I turn around and look at my butt.
"It's not that big..."
"Big enough for me. Please put on some shorts."
"But—"
"No buts." he comes closer to me. "You're going out in public in this dress, a thong and no shorts?" He reaches under my dress. "I don't want these people seeing what's mine."
"Joseph... the kids will be down in a minute."
"You know I don't need long..." his hand slides and moves my thong band aside.
"I know... but once you start, I don't want you to stop."
"Ready daddy!" Anjali and Mark run down the stairs and Joe quickly takes his hand out from under my dress.
"Are you ok Malaika?" Mark asks me.
"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"
"Your face is very red." He answers. I look over at Joe and he smiles and looks down.
"I'm ok. It's the uh pregnancy. I get hot flashes. I'm gonna get some water. Why don't you two head out to the car?" Mark grabs the keys leaving me with Joe. "Idiot." I lightly hit him.
"Oh please." he laughs. "You enjoyed it." I make a face.
"Not the point. With two more kids, we have to be careful with our sneaking. You just have to practice restraint."
"Fuck outta here. No. Not gonna do it."
"Joesph..."
"Indie..." he whines he slightly flails his arms. "I can't do that. We'll figure it out. Just please don't ask me to restrain myself." I roll my eyes and groan.
"Fine, you big baby." I push him out the door.
~
After we buy the camera, we go back to the house to film our introduction video so I can set up our channel.
"So I think we should set up in the family room." Joe suggests. "It has the best lighting."
"Alrighty." Joe puts the camera on the stand and sets it up so it gets us both in the frame. "Ready for this?" I ask him.
"Oh yeah." he turns the camera on and sits down next to me. We sit in silence for a few seconds. "You go first."
"No you."
"Ladies first."
"Nope. Doing things different. You go." Joe sighs.
"Fine. I'm Joe Anoa'i."
"And I'm Malaika Anoa'i and welcome to The Anoa'i Family Vlogs." We both applaud. "Yay!"
"This is just an introduction video to give you all a little information about us and our vlog."
"Joe and I have been married since 2013 and we have 5 kids."
"There's Joelle, Mark, Anjali and now we have twins on the way. So we have a packed house. There's the 5 kids, Malaika, myself, Galina who is Joelle's mom and our dog Boo."
"So basically this channel is going to be our daily life, with me being a retired wrestler helping raise 5 kids and Joe on the road being an active wrestler."
"We'll pick some questions off of Twitter and here on YouTube to answer for you guys."
"Sometimes we'll have segments with the kids, sometimes it'll be Joe and myself, or Galina and myself or all three of us. And we'll film birthday parties, the baby shower/gender reveal and I will definitely will be giving pregnancy updates."
"We hope that this channel gives the fans somethings that they really want to see."
"Because this lug is so private." I point to my husband. Joe rolls his eyes. "Anyways we hope you all enjoy the content and subscribe to our channel."
"Because if you don't my wife will get really upset. And when she gets upset I get upset and then if I get upset—" I cover his mouth with my hand.
"Moa, honey, they get it." I turn to the camera. "Just subscribe. Feel free to follow us on our social media accounts that will be listed below."
"With that being said, thanks for watching..."
"And we'll see you in the next vlog." Joe gets up and turns the camera off.
"I think that went well." I say.
"I think so too." I grab my Mac and upload it immediately to edit it. I throw in the intro video that one of WWE's graphic designers made and look it over one more time. I set up our Youtube channel and post the video.
I know this is going to be complicated, trying to get ready for two babies, raising the three we have already and keeping up with a vlog? Thank God I'm retired because this is a full time job.
But it keeps me busy and kind of in the life, so why the hell not?
X
July 17, 2018
Los Angeles, CA
Mark, Anjali, Galina, JoJo and myself touch down in the LAX airport.
For the next couple of days, Joe has some serious media days lined up. Today he's accepting the ESPN Humanitarian Award on behalf of WWE, tomorrow he's going to the ESPY's and Thursday is Nickelodeon's Kids Choice Sports Awards. And guess who he's taking to all those events? Not this woman right here, nope he's taking Joelle.
Am I mad? Hell no.
Am I jealous? Absolutely not. I have no reason to be.
I'm fucking pregnant with twins, Anjali is too young and Mark gets a little anxious with crowds larger than 100 people so he's slowly adjusting. So JoJo is the only one left. I think it's a great idea for them to spend this time together. Joe needs to put his daughter out front and center to show these people, yes he had a daughter he didn't know about but that doesn't mean he's going to hide her from the world. She deserves the same treatment that any of his other children get.
So with that being said, I brought the vlog camera and while Joe and JoJo are doing their thing, the rest of us will be out having a grand ol' time.
As soon as we get into our hotel room, I take out the video camera.
"Good morning beautiful people! Today is Tuesday and the Anoa'i family has a busy couple of days ahead of us. This week we will be spending our time in Los Angeles, Joe has a lot of press events he needs to go to so he will be going to those with JoJo. And the rest of us will be doing our thing while they're out doing their thing. I won't be splitting this video into two, it'll just be one long video. Joe will not be bringing the video camera with him so you guys are stuck with me. Please don't forget to like and subscribe and without further ado, let's get this LA adventure going." I turn the camera off and set it aside.
Joe comes into the room, sweaty. He most likely went to the gym.
"Glad you guys made it." he greets us as we all unpack. "I'm gonna hop in the shower." He goes into the bathroom and Galina lays out Joelle's dress for tonight.
"You excited?" I ask Joelle.
"Kind of. A little nervous." Joe comes out the bathroom.
"Don't be. You'll be a pro." Joe says.
"And that whole imagining people in their underwear thing, don't do it. It's gross." I say.
"Who came up with that?" Joelle asks.
"A stupid person." I answer. I lean back in the chair and rub my belly.
"You ok mommy?" Anjali asks me.
"Yes baby I'm ok. I'm just tired." I look at Joe. "Your babies are draining me. I can't even walk to the other side of the room without losing energy." Joe kneels down in front of me.
"Listen tiny humans, I'm gonna need you to calm down with mommy. She's got a long way to go. So take it easy on her."
"Thanks." I say sarcastically. "That's very helpful." He kisses my cheek.
We all take a quick nap before Joe and Joelle get up to get ready to go.
"Damn it." I watch Joe stare at himself in the mirror.
"Joseph? Babe, the bruising won't go down the more you stare at it."
"I know... I don't know why they always have to go for my eyes. I mean there are other parts of body. My arms, legs... why the face?" He points to his face. "This is the main attraction."
"Well... it's not just your face." I bite my lower lip.
"But people can't see all that."
"And we don't need them to."
"Yeah. I'm not Colby." I look at him.
"Really?" He chuckles.
"What? It's true." Joe claps his hands together. "Alright short stuff. Let's do this."
"I'm not short." Joelle furrows her eyebrows in disgust. "I'm a good height for my age." Joe rolls his eyes.
"So what's my family doing while we're gone?"
"Going to Universal's CityWalk." Galina answers as she comes in with Anjali in her arms. "It's something light to do after such a long flight."
"Sounds good." Joe agrees. "We will see you later." Joe kisses myself and his kids goodbye and Galina does the same to Joelle and they leave.
~
"Here we are at CityWalk Hollywood." I say into the camera. "Say hi guys." I turn the camera towards Mark who is helping Galina push Anjali in her stroller.
"Hi." Mark waves.
"Hi camera." Anjali says from the stroller.
"For those of you who don't know, this is Galina. Joe's ex, Joelle's mom and my life saver."
"Stop it." She says.
"I'm serious." I pull her into the frame with me. "If I had to raise 4 kids by myself, I would go crazy. She's absolutely amazing. Everybody needs to find themselves a Galina because they're the best in the whole world and they have amazing hair."
X
July 23, 2018
Cincinatti, OH
Monday Night Raw
Joe's POV:
"Alright guys, I'm not too good at this "vlogging" thing so bear with me." I say as I walk backstage at the arena.
"I see you with your camera Joe!" My cousin Trinity calls out.
"Just the woman I wanted to see." I say happily. "This is my cousin Trinity."
"Shut up Joe everybody knows that." she takes the camera and turns it towards me. "So twins huh? How's it feel?" I shrug.
"It's ok I guess. A little overwhelming but I think we can handle it."
"Oh lookie here, it's one of Joe's best friends Colby aka Seth Rollins. Say hi to everyone." Colby waves.
"Give me back my camera." I slightly whine.
"Fine you big baby. But just so you know, your views went up now since I was featured." She hands me back my camera.
"Sorry about that guys." I clear my throat. "So this is backstage. It's usually very busy back here. And here is the most important station besides catering: hair and makeup."
"Are you recording us Joe?" Dana asks.
"Of course." Lana sticks herself in front of the camera.
"You picked a great day to film because I came all the way over to Raw from Smackdown." She says.
"Um excuse you. You're not the only one who did that." An Australian accent pipes up. I turn around and put the camera on the IIconics, Billie and Peyton.
"She's right." Billie says. "We traveled such a long way and it's only right that you feature the IIconics as well."
"Ladies, ladies." I say. "There's enough vlog to go around. I think we'll call this segment, Diva Cam. So have at it ladies." I hand the camera to them and they take it over.
Yep. I could get used to this.
~
Sierra's POV:
"Hey baby." Fergal greets me. "A little birdie told me that you got caught on the Diva Cam for Joe's vlog." I blush and look down.
"Yeah. JoJo got me in it. He seems to be really enjoying it. It gives us something to do backstage."
"I'm glad they didn't leave you out." He kisses me on the cheek.
"Ferg?"
"Yes beautiful?"
"We've been together for a while so I wanted to ask you something."
"Anything."
"Why did you and Cathy break up?" I ask. Fergal sighs. "Y—You don't have to answer if you don't want to it's ok. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked." Fergal takes my hands to shut me up.
"It's ok love. I don't mind you asking." I nod. "We—I broke up with her because she was too private about our relationship. She didn't post anything that had to do with us. She would literally post about everything else except us."
"Then why didn't you post anything?"
"Because I respected her privacy. But after some time, I just got tired of it. I like to show my woman off and I couldn't do that with her. I can be a private person too—"
"Babe, you posted a picture of your ass because there was a bruise on it..."
"Ok private about certain things."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize. Clearly she wasn't the one for me. Believe me there are pictures of you that I would love to post..." I furrow my eyebrows.
"When you're laying in my bed, naked and the bedsheets are draped over you covering your... lady parts." my eyes widen.
"You have a picture of that?" He nods. "Well lemme see." He pulls out his phone and shows me the picture. "Damn. I look good." He smiles widely.
"I know. The point is, I love being able to show you off. Do you like showing me off?"
"My boyfriend is Finn fucking Balor. Of course I love showing you off."
X
August 4, 2018
Georgia
Cathy's POV:
"Cathy! Cathy!" My friend Charity snaps me out of my thoughts.
"What?" I ask.
"We're supposed to be having a great time on this boat celebrating Francia's birthday and you're over there Instagram stalking your ex."
"What can I say? He dumped me for a stupid reason. So what I like to keep certain things private?"
"Oh my God just let it go." Gina groans. "He's moved on. He's happy." I scoff.
"It's not fair. It should be me." I look back at his photos and try not to look at the ones with her.
"Just be glad you're not at every event so you have to see them together." Francia says.
"I miss him..."
"Stay away." Charity says. "It'll only make things worse." I toss my phone aside and look out at the water.
I have to know for sure...
X
Oooo Cathy you bought to start some mess?
Yes Malaika and Joe are now vloggers! I mean why not right?
Until next time: Henry Cavill is built like a Greek God and I'm still keeping idea requests open.
Coming soon: Summerslam!!!!! #ByeBrock
QOTC: Which match are you looking forward to for SS? Any predictions?
Gifs of the chapter: