The unbearable heat was pressed to my back; it was suffocating and heavy, unusually heavy. I squeezed my eyes shut blocking out the morning sun that filtered through my eyelids. The warmth pressed harder against my bare back. It wrapped around my torso, pulling me in further. The bed felt incredibly soft and warm. Something didn't feel right. I hummed under my breath and tossed on the bed. My hand suddenly collided with something firm and warm. Warm breath brushed my face. My eyes shot open. A gasp escaped my lips and my eyes widened at the sight. I blinked in disbelief. Then everything from last night hit me like a ton of bricks. Heat rushed to my face as my eyes examined his exposed body. For a moment I forgot everything.
My eyes travelled up his chest and met his burning gaze. Those coal eyes burnt through me making my face heat up even more.
"Good morning" he whispered with an impish smirk playing on his lips. My heart pounded when I heard his voice. He must have picked up on my panicked expression, "Don't worry, nothing happened..." his words trailed as he held the smirk. He cocked his head and his eyes danced while they reflected the morning light.
My lips went dry and I could feel them sticking to each other as I continued to stare at him. How long had he been awake? I felt something move over my torso. His arm was wrapped around my stomach pulling me in towards him more.
My heart hammered when his fingers caressed my face and his face drew closer. His lips captured mine, playfully and teasing. When he caught my tongue between his lips and sucked me into his mouth I couldn't hold back my moan. My eyes closed and my hands wondered out from under the warm sheets and into his hair. I felt myself surrendering to the escalating bliss of his lips on mine.
A gasp escaped my lips as his lips broke our kiss and bit into the side of my neck teasingly. "Get dressed" I heard him whisper. His warm breath brushed against my skin once again as my eyes flicked open.
I focused my hazy eyes on his. Why did he want me to get dressed?
"I have a meeting.... But I want you to come with me" he said answering my question without even me having to ask it. Was my face that easy to read?
"b-bu-" he cut me off by placing his lips on mine once again to effectively shut me up.
So let me get this straight....
First I confessed to him... no I kissed him then confessed, then.... Fell asleep in his bed... now he wanted me to go to work with him.
I was too caught up in my own thoughts to have even noticed him getting out of bed, until his tall figure was upright next to the bed. My eyes immediately fixated on his underwear as he walked away from the bed. I was gawking at him. My eyes wondered everywhere, but mostly they were fixated on his bum till he walked into his ensuite-bathroom.
Once he disappeared into the room I jumped out from the bed still partially hyperventilating and scurried to my room. Not even bothering to knock I entered. It was then that I remembered about Tanya. But oddly she was nowhere in the room. The bed was well made and a hush had taken over the room. My heart pounded as I leaned over the edge of the sink in the bathroom.
I wasted no time betting ready. Something inside on me was eager to rush away with him. It was indeed borderline frightful but I simply dismissed it.
"Well. Don't you look chipper today Derek" interrupted a cheerful voice that made me stop in my tracks. I hadn't realized that I had a grin across my face till it dropped.
"Tanya.. y-" I blinked at her while taking in the image of her stuffing what looked like a rather large pancake into her mouth. The syrup dripped off the fork and on to the white china.
"good morning to you too... so...." Her eyes wondered around the room for a moment and then settled on me once again. "loooooks like someone had a fun night" she raised an eyebrow playfully.
A rush of blood passed to my face and she chuckled "Hey Haden.. I hear you got lucky.." she continued and winked. I swung around and Haden stood right behind me with a pleased smile on his face.
"you really need to get your sources checked" he chuckled and walked past me.
"foo bad" she mumbled with another mouth full of food.
Haden emerged again with a steaming mug in his hands. I presumed it was coffee; and one he stood next to me I could smell it. It was strong. I never imagined him as a coffee person. I gawked at him yet again. He caught me gawking and nudged his mug towards me. The steam warmed my face... and I imagined the hot liquid running down my throat warming up every cold bit of me. Yet I waved the offer away and watched him take a sip out of it. I hated Coffee.
"Are you going to stand there gawking at me or are you going to eat?" his voice snapped me back to reality. My face blushed a deep red when I realized that I had been staring at him. I really needed help.
I took a seat next to Tanya who was in denim shorts and one of my shirts. My eyes widened when I saw the jagged edges of it. she cut it... she cut my t-shirt! "did you...cut my shirt?" I asked in disbelief.
"hmm...." She looked down at herself and then back up to me with the sly smile. "yeah... this looks very cute don't you think Derek. Very very cute" she mumbled the last bit to herself.
"bu-"
"oh hush... I'll get you a new one" she waved her hand at me and continued her intense relationship with the pancakes. How many exactly had she had? There were four more large pancakes on her plate covered in syrup.
"Hurry up Derek... we don't have all day" suddenly Haden's voice came from behind me and a pancake fell onto my plate. I watched the syrup dribble on it. I love pancakes, much better than coffee.
I wasted no time munching it down. When I looked up Tanya was still sitting there with more on her plate, this time with Ice Cream.. My mouth hung open at the sight. When did she get the Ice Cream?
This can't be natural! How much could she eat?
I got up and dropped the dish into the clean sink before leaving.
"Hope You Get lucky... Derek" Tanya called out while winking and giving me the thumbs up as I walked out. Haden held back his laughter or any sign of a smile and his lips just ended with a crocked smile.
I gave her the finger as I walked out and I heard her laughing aloud behind me.
"So..um" the words echoed as we walked towards his car. He paused and turned to face me. Standing there in front of me it felt as if he was teasing me. I loved him in his suites; nothing looked amazing on him than a suit. The cold autumn wind picked his black tie but he flattened it against his chest and gave me a questioning look while opening the door for me. I focused my gaze on the ground and got into the car without another word.
My body jerked when I heard the door of the other side slam shut. My mind was quite literally screaming 'what's happening' at me and I wish I knew. The engine roared to life and the sudden urge to just jump out from the car took over me. Restraining the dyeing urge I sat still. I felt very under dressed in my blue pants and sweater. Standing next to him I'd look ordinary anyway. This couldn't be good for my self-esteem.
There was quietness in the car. It was as if we were strangers locked in a constrained space. But that wasn't true now was it? neither of us started a conversation. I wanted to, but... my insecurities held me back. What on earth would I say to say to him anyway. I couldn't possibly make small talk. Small talk was awkward and never ended well for me. It was pointless altogether.
The bravery from above and below started to play. It had a hypnotic sense to it, especially the way it started. I turned all my attention to the song and closed my eyes. I felt myself drifting into serenity.
A loud thud made me jump in my seat. The seat belt held me in place. My head jerked up and frantically looked around. Everything was dark. Where the hell was I? I turned to the driver's seat. It was empty.
Another loud thud came from the back. A low murmur followed right after. Unbuckling my seat belt and quite literally jumped out from the car.
"Derek!" a surprised voice met my ears. I couldn't see much in the dim light. "you're awake" the low voice continued. "Come with me.." the voice trailed and a warm hand met mine. It was large and manly....I guess. The warm fingers intertwined with mine and tugged in my arm. I quietly followed its calm lead. My mind was partially foggy and the darkness didn't help one bit.
Suddenly we were exposed to the bright sunny. It burned my eyes. I shut them immediately and raised my other hand to cover my eyes. The light dimmed and I slowly opened my eyes. They grew wider at the large vessel that was before me.
A jet.
Why was there a jet in front of me?
The sensation of the tightened hand came again, when I looked up I saw none other than Haden. His black sunglasses matched his image especially with the black suit he had on. I felt gazes burning on me. Looking around I realized all the eyes that were on me...on us. I wondered why for a moment then realized it was only because he was carelessly holding my hand.
"are you ready?" he asked turning to me.
Ready? Ready for what?'
I narrowed my eyes at him confuse then to the jet. He laughed and placed his other hand on my shoulder.
"We are going to New York"
"what!" my voice burst making me choke on my own saliva.
He stared at me politely letting the information sink into my mind.
"for how long?" I went on.
"I don't know, probably about a week" he answered raising an eyebrow.
"A—week? b-but....I don't have-"
"we're late... now come on" he said cutting me off and dragging me by the arm up the stars and into the jet.
"Everything is already at our hotel" he said looking out the window.
For a moment I wondered what he was talking about then it clicked. He was answering my question from before. How did he know to have our clothes There. Had he planned this from the beginning?
I opened my mouth to ask but I was hushed by the vibrating sound of the turbine engines. I involuntarily squeezed his hand making him turn his head to me with curiosity.
It felt as if we had been flying for ever. There was silence in the cabin. The hostesses came occasionally asking us whether we would like refreshments. I turned them down a few times but then the nervous nerves in me got a hold of me. I tried not to think of Haden and how much of an effect his presence had on me. His hand stayed firmly on mine the entire time.
Later I ordered alcohol –scotch to be exact. That was the only think I could think of that would calm me down. As soon as I got the glass in my hand I sculled it without a second thought. I felt it rush through me, burning my insides as it did.
"Have you ever been to New York" his voice suddenly caught me off guard.
"huh?...oh no" I answered shaking my head. "Why are we here anyway?" asked him, catching a glance at the vast city below us.
He let out a hidden laugh before answering my question "Remember Julian?"
I nodded once.
"well this is where he works. I was going to go to LA but there was a change of plans" Haden said. honestly I didn't pay much attention to what he was saying. I was more taken by the way his lips moved when he spoke and the sound of his voice. It was so hypnotic... god what was wrong with me. I thought I could control myself but it was obvious that I couldn't.
"Derek, Kiss me" his whispering voice was in my ear and my face switched to him. But it wasn't him; he hadn't spoken. Haden was staring out the small window. I rubbed my neck when the memory of the sensation of his breath and lips materialized on my senses. I was definitely going crazy.
I was asleep the next time I heard his voice.
"I know you want to Derek" His voice whispered again. I opened my eyes as his voice sent chills down my spine. This time I could feel his warm breath on my neck. "I know you want to" His hypnotically sensual voice continued, I felt his lips brush over the tip of my ear as he spoke. I turned to him once more. He was too busy flipping through the documents that lay in front of him.
What the fuck!
The jet finally came to a halt on the run way and the heavy mechanical door opened. Haden grabbed his black coat and walked out after motioning me to follow him. I followed suite. The air was colder, as it hit my face I felt pins and needles on my skin. I wasn't dressed for cold weather as cold as this.
Walking down the stairs my whole body shivered Haden turned to me and gave me a self-pleased chuckle and threw me his coat. Rude. Catching it in mid-air its warmth immediately spread through my body when I put it on. I sniffed the coat before I could stop myself. I froze realising what I had done and looked around to make sure no one had seen me. I really was turning into a creep. Though the coat really smelled like him and I liked it. I could just close my eyes and just imagine him.
"Haden!" a loud and obnoxious voice came from afar. My eyes flicked open. I hadn't realized that I had been standing there with my eyes closed with my arms wrapped around myself while imagining him.
Julian came into my vision. He pulled Haden into an overly friendly hug that made me draw my brows together. A sting of dislike towards Julian spread through me.
"Ah... you brought Derek!" Julian said cheerfully and I tried to force a smile onto my face but it was useless. Julian shook my hand and mildly tugged me towards the black shiny car that was parked near the jet.
It was late by the time we arrived at the hotel. I had been too immersed in taking in the hotel that I had tuned out Haden and Julian. When I finally focused on what was happening around me and snapped back to reality I noticed that Julian was gone. Haden stood in front of me with a curious look on his face with his eyes traveling up and down observing my every move.
"Come on" he nudged me into the magnificent building. The inside was designed with gold and very decorative ivory coloured flowers. All of it shined under the bright yellow lights. My eyes wondered all around the lobby while Haden took the keys from the blonde girl that stood behind the desk. She had the brightest smile and a very flirty hair flick. Haden paid no mind to her; he just took the keys and left and I followed Haden to our room. For a while I wondered why we were walking into the same room but then I began to wonder whether I would want to be in a different room.
Apparently he always stayed in the master suite and it was always ready for him. When we entered the room at the very top floor I had a better view of all the amazing buildings in NY. I gawked at the sight. Haden opened another set of doors inside the suit to reveal just a single large bed. Dry sweat began to materialize on my forehead. I have to sleep with him on there said a voice immediately when I laid my eyes on the bed and my heart pounded uncontrollably.
"I have to go... but make yourself at home Derek" he said turning me around to face him. The way he said my name was so......hot? Was that the word? It was like he whispered it every time he said it, I couldn't get it out of my head.
I gave him a questioning look, but he said nothing more. I caught his face drawing closer to mine with each second that passed. my heart raced, my stomach turned and squeezed... he was going to kiss me. Mind screamed and then it went quiet. Our eyes were locked and I didn't realize that I was pushing myself in towards him. To my disappointing surprise he paused. His eyes were half open and his face inches away. I held my breath. My mind yearned to feel his lips on mine and I knew that my rational mind was too far gone, that I had no control over it anymore.
He paused hesitantly and pulled his bottom lip in and bit it. His eyes dropped and stood straight back up brushing off whatever that was about it happen a moment ago.
"I'll see you tonight" he whispered and ran his fingers through my hair and instead kissed my forehead. I was left standing at the entrance to the bedroom like an idiot. I couldn't figure out what had just happened.
The tension that was in the air in that second was crushing and for the rest of the day I couldn't get it out of my mind. Usually I was fairly good at figuring people out but Haden was one of few that no matter how much I tried to figure out I couldn't.
I watched TV and ordered room service, other than that there wasn't much to do.
While I laid on the bed in absolute darkness my mind roamed back to Haden. What was he doing and where was he. The time on my phone read 10 pm and I felt the drowsiness sweeping over me. But I refused to give in to it. There were far too many things that I wanted to think about.
A rattle and dim light woke me up from a sleep that I didn't know I had fallen into. The bed dipped and then I felt something brush over my head. It was warm and gentle. It was a hand....I tried to force my eyes to open but I failed. Travelling had indeed gotten the better of me. Warm soft lips pressed on my forehead. They stayed there for a while. I knew who it was. His breath brushed on my skin and it sent a shiver sensation through my body.
"Good night, Sweetheart" were the last words that brushed over my ear before my mind drifted away into a deep sleep.
I tossed in the bed and my arm hit the empty side of the bed where I presumed Haden would have slept. My eyes shot open and looked at the space next to me. It was empty. I was on the bed along curled up on one side. Where Haden should have been sleeping was empty and it awoke curiousness in me. Where was he? I wondered. I swore that I heard him enter the room last night. Yawning I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and staged out of the room. Movement from the couch that was facing the large windows caught my attention. A blanket hung from the edge of it. My eyebrows drew closer as I approached the curious blob.
My eyes widened when it saw Haden just sleeping there.. why? that's what I wanted to know. Why was he on the couch. He could have as easily just slept in the bed...with me.
He moved uncomfortably on the couch and shivered. The thin blanket he had on was falling off him. His pillow was partially on the floor. He looked uncomfortable. I felt guilty.
I wondered whether I should wake him up; but as if on cue he stretched, pulling his body to its full length. His feet stuck out from the edge of the couch.
"Haden" I whispered timidly and poked him. Yes, I poked him. I was not going to take any chances this time. last time I found him asleep on a couch it turned out that he was just playing me.. if he thought I was going to fall for that trick again he was mistaken.
I was so close to just walking away, but I couldn't bear to see him lying there uncomfortably.
"Haden" I said again holding my shaky nervous voice stern as I possibly could.
This time he responded, he opened his eyes and focused on me. "Derek?" he murmured and yawned while rubbing his eyes then looking at his watch that was still wrapped around his wrist.
"Why are you sleeping on the couch?" I blurted; the words from inside my head materialized aloud. His head switched to me in surprise.
Blood rushed to my face making me blush. "N-no th-that's not what I meant" I stammered and tried to justify what I had just said. He yawned through the chuckle and his eyes were slightly teary from the lack of sleep. He stepped out from under the blanket and sat there rubbing his sleepy eyes.
There was a knock at the door, and I all but ran to answer the door to escape the embarrassment. A waiter greeted me while she pushed a silver trolley into our room. The most delicious aroma came from the covered dishes. I blinked as I stood there confused. I hadn't ordered room service.
"Thank you" Said Haden from behind me, as he firmly pressed his hand on my shoulder. The waiter forced a smile on her face and bowed before leaving.
We ate in silence. I could feel his eyes on me.
"I didn't think you'd want me up there, with you." Haden said, suddenly. It took me a moment to comprehend what he was referring to; when I looked up at him, he had placed his cutlery on the plate and pulled his chair closer to me.
I swallowed the half chewed egg in my mouth and looked up at him nervously.
"Look, we haven't had the best start to this relationship." He said, and paused before taking my hand in his, "We both know this. I wasn't the best person to you and it surprises me that you've forgiven me for all the shit I put you through. But now, I want to do things right. I want to make it up to you."
I looked down at my hand that was in his, and squeezed my fingers around his. "I'd like that." I murmured. I don't like when it feels like you're pulling away from me.
"Good." He smiled, stood from his seat and kissed my forehead. I frowned my brows before reaching up and grasping his face in my hands and pecking his lips. It clearly caught him off guard because he paused for a moment before he kissed my lips.
After breakfast we hopped into a rented car and Haden drove us towards the inner city. I had no idea where I was. But I followed suite when he hopped out the car and walked towards a gigantic building.
Walking inside and going to the top floor we were greeted by a blue eyed, brown haired man. He had such a youthful and pleasant face to him. He smiled politely and gave us a nod.
"Hello, I'm Marcus" his curious blue eyes travelled from me to Haden. Shaking our hands he turned around and started walking down the long hall whilst explain details that I didn't pay much attention to. He escorted us to a large corner office that had a magnificent view of the city sky line.
Haden was warmly greeted by the people in the office while I only got a 'who are you and why are you here' look from another Amber eyed man whose features matched Julian's. They must be related.
In the end, of course, Marcus was asked to show me around. I was glad for it. I was not interested in listening to whatever 'business' they were going to discuss. Marcus was basically asked to 'babysit' me while Haden spoke business. I felt sorry for him.
I sat in the spare chair that Marcus brought into his small cubical.
I spotted a bouquet of withering roses in the bin.
"so..." Marcus's voice trailed, trying to started a conversation.
"You won't believe who I just SAW!!" A very feminine voice almost shrieked with excitement from behind me. My whole body turned to her at the sound of her voice. She was.... gorgeous. Her fiery red hair swayed behind her and those Hazel eyes were focused on Marcus. "Haden Smith... That man is a GOD!" She continued throwing her head back with excitement. Her pale almost ivory skin glistened and her curved figure was tightly wrapped in a black skirt and a red ruffled top. She stomped her heels as she walked closer to Marcus who looked at her with wide eyes. "Scratch that, Marcus. The man is a sex god!" She placed her hand on either side of Marcus's shoulders.
It took me a moment to realize that she was talking about Haden...My Haden. My eyes widened as I watched her grinned at Marcus and speak about my fiancé. That woman hot, but crazy. My body stiffened and my face fell.
"I hear he brought his Fiancé.. apparently he is GAY! Can you believe that! Every hot guy I see is either married or GAY!." She clearly hadn't seen me sitting there in the room, awkwardly. Her words felt like blunt knives. I knew she meant nothing bad by it but still. "I bet his fiancé is ho-" Marcus's eyes switched to me before interrupting her mid-sentence. She paused mid-sentence and followed his gaze. Her eyes widened then narrowed at me in acknowledgement. I didn't know whether I was supposed to act like I heard what she said or whether I was supposed to ignore it.
"Hi" She rushed out the words while standing straight and turning her full self to me. "Who-"
"This is Derek.." Marcus cut her off. His voice trailed as his gaze moved from me to his friend who was clearly intrigued. "Hi, Derek. I'm Anna... how come I've never seen you around? Are you new." Her glistened as they focused on me.
"oh-" was all I could get out before Marcus answered for me.
"He is Haden's-" She gasped. Marcus didn't need to say more, it was obvious she got what he was trying to say.
Her eyes widened and studied me from head to toe. "I was right he is hot" she muttered to herself. "In a boyish kind of way." I doubted she met to say that out loud but I was flattered.
A chuckle passed my lips surprising even me. She gasped again when she realised what she had said.
"Oh My God.. I-I'm Sooo Sorry, I-I shouldn't have" She stuttered while searching for the right words to say.
This was entertaining.
"Don't worry about it" I half chuckled through my words.
"Okay.." she grinned and propped herself on Marcus's table. I studied her curiously as she stared at me with excitement.
If Haden ever over heard her speak of him like that it would obviously only boost his already oversized ego.
"So.. tell me... What is he like." she leaned forward.
The environment around me suddenly changed I felt as if I was being interrogated. I laughed awkwardly at her question and refused to answer it. But interest in our relationship only increased. Her interest in him ticked me off, she was gorgeous and as much as I hated to admit it I felt threatened by her. It was a possessive feelings that made my insides turn. She was pretty and then the image of her and him popped into my head. I ground my teeth together at the thought of them looking good together.
"So do you love him?" She shot at me.
I had said it a couple of night ago to Haden, but it was embarrassing admitting to it. I swallowed before giving her a quick nod.
"nawwwww he is so cute!" she said in a patronizing tone. "But Derek I want to hear you say it.." she raised a brow. I looked away slightly annoyed.
I chewed on my own tongue while thinking up the answer "yes" I breathed quickly.
"NO. not like that.. say 'I love Haden' like you mean it!" she urged me.
"Anna let him be!" Marcus interjected and patted Anna's hand that rested on the table.
"but I want to hear him say it..." she whined. What was her problem!
"Fine.." Why was I doing this again? Something seriously had to be wrong with me if I was letting someone I just met control me like this. "I love Haden" I said the dreaded words and swallowed. I bit my bottom lip immediately after I said them.
Every time I said those words I realized that even though I dreaded saying them I liked saying them. I dreaded saying that I loved him because I knew I was going to realize it sooner than later and it was going to cause chaos inside me. Perhaps it was already too late.
My mind was on him even when he was nowhere near me. My eyes were on him whenever he was in the same room as me.
Denial was such an ugly thing.
I loved Haden, I had always loved him and I never really wanted to accept it. It felt so right.... so right that I was afraid of the feeling.
I was afraid of the feeling, so afraid that I locked it away.
You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. You love Haden. I love Haden. I love Haden.
The voice inside my head chanted over and over again till my own thoughts agreed to it. My chest tightened and moisture oozed into my eyes.
But I am terrible to him. I am terrible for him.
I never show him how much I care. All I ever do is overreact, deny my feelings or run away, or make excuses. Why couldn't I be normal for once and show him how I felt like a normal person.
Why would he ever be in love with a train-wreck like me.
He could do so much better.
"Derek are you alright" she asked, clearly confused by my sudden silence.
"Yeah.. never better" I muttered.
I heard Anna gasped again.
"Mister Dalton. Mister Smith." She said in an awkward voice. My head shot up and my lips dried. Haden stood next to the Julian with a questioning look on his face. My words caught my throat. Had he heard me? My face flushed.
I stood up hastily with fisted hands by my side. I couldn't look at him.
"I-" that's all I could say; honestly I didn't know what to say. Slowly backing away I turned and ran without a second thought. I didn't know why I just left like that.
"Derek Wait-" I heard a female voice call after me. I didn't even turn to look I rushed down the stairs without even bothering to wait for the elevator. My mind emptied by the time I reached the bottom floor. I huffed as I walked fast as I could towards the car.
Leaning against the car I realized how useless that was. I definitely caused a scene and probably embarrassed Haden. Running my fingers through my hair I sighed. I felt warm liquid trail from my eyes. Wiping the away I slid down the side of the car and sat on the partially wet ground not caring that it was wet. My knees felt weak from running and my mind was fogged.
I heard footfalls heading towards me, and my heart stopped for a moment. I froze. But it was some pedestrian.
I couldn't take it anymore. My breath became irregular and my vision blurred. The warm liquid rolled down my face. Burying my face behind my knees I sat in silence. I couldn't take it anymore.
Something brushed over my hair making me jump in my skin and look up. A tall figure towered over me. It was Haden he crouched down to my level a worried and torn expression was plastered on his face.
"Derek, are you okay?" he asked while reaching one arm towards me cautiously.
When our eyes met more tears trickled down. Haden looked completely lost. Letting go of my arms from around my legs I sprung at him wrapping my arms around his neck and burying my face in the crook of his neck. He lost balance and fell backwards on his butt with me between his legs.
His hand slowly pressed against my back softly, and he held me in place.
"What's wrong Derek?" his voice was calm and my arms tightened around his neck when I heard him speak my name.
I sniffed and squeezed my eyes shut "I can't take it anymore..." I partially sobbed on to his shoulder.
"What can't you take Derek?" he asked with his voice still calm and collected.
"I don't know what to do..." the sobbing got worse, I kept my eyes shut tightly but the tears still escaped. My lips quivered and my voice shook.
"It's okay, Derek." He said lovingly and ran his hand down my back over and over again trying to get me to calm down. "Don't cry, sweetheart... It's okay" he whispered while slightly turning his head to where mine was buried.
"No.. It's not okay......" I sniffed again. I felt his hand just calmly patting my back. "I love you and......and I don't know what to do" I sobbed.
I felt his body stiffen undermine. His hands stopped stroking my back and wrapped around me tightly.
"You don't have to do anything Derek..." He breathed tightening his arms around me.
"You could do so much better" I mumbled.
"I don't believe that for a second." He responded in a whisper, and kissed the top of my head affectionately.
After a moment he released his arms and peeled me off him. I imagined my face was still red and covered in tears. I hesitantly looked up at him. The expression on his face was soft and full of a variety of emotions. He raised me by my arms while he stood on the cold wet floor. Coming up to my feet I looked at him, the look in his eyes beckoned me not to look away.
Hesmiled gently "Come, we can go wherever you want.."
Hi HO Another Update galore!
I believe there are only 4 or so more chapters left to go.
Fun fact, this chapter was 6000 words. i didn't think it'd be possible for them to get any longer. but i suppose i wanted to tie it all together. Also, it serves as an introduction to the spin-off "THE SECRET ADMIRER" which is complete and online, and can be read as a stand alone for those who haven't yet checked it out!!
Finally, I won't be updating through the weekend because i will be away. But the next few chapters will come out next week!
I was truly hoping to wrap it up this week, but the chapters have a mind of their own it seems so, updates will resume next week.
UNTIL THEN, VOTE VOTE VOTE & let me know what you think
Lots of Love
xox
Nic