Jonas and I had absolutely no luck with the weather. It hadn't stopped raining and the only things we had been doing were eating, sleeping, reading, talking and making out.
The last activity was what had me slightly scared and anxious, considering the fact that make out sessions with Jonas always got heated very quickly. Of course I had thought about having sex with Jonas before since that came inevitably with being in a relationship and the girls had been asking me about it nonstop. However, I wasn't sure if I was quite ready yet. On the other hand, how did you know you were ready? I knew that I trusted Jonas with my life and I was comfortable in my body. It also felt good to be so close to him. But was that enough to really go in all the way?
I had been at the gynecologist for a check-up since I wanted to make sure that everything was okay and she had convinced me to start getting on birth control immediately. So now that contraception and the matter of safe sex were out of the way, the only thing keeping me from sleeping with Jonas were him and me.
Was I ready for this level of intimacy?
"What are you thinking about?" Jonas' voice brought me back to reality and I turned my head to look at him.
We were laying next to each other, me engrossed or rather pretend-engrossed in a book and him playing some game on his phone.
He had put his phone away and was now looking at me intently.
I sighed. I wanted to share my thoughts with him but I was also scared it would make things awkward. However, I always felt like talking about a thing made it less scary. So I got together all my courage and glanced at the ceiling before answering.
"Sex."
"Hva?" Jonas chuckled and I looked back at him.
"I'm thinking about having sex with you." I repeated and his expression sobered up, a small smile playing around his lips.
"What conclusion have you come to then?" He asked and rearranged himself so his head was propped up on his arm.
I creased my forehead and shrugged. "I think I want to have sex with you but I'm not sure if I'm ready."
Jonas was silent for a second. "Are you really still a virgin how Chris said?"
I blushed and nodded. "Weird, I know."
He shook his head and scooted closer, his hand playing with my hair. "I don't think it's weird." He glanced at my lips before returning his gaze to my eyes. "Can I ask you why?"
"There was just never someone that was interested in me the same way I was interested in them." I shrugged again. "And I didn't want to have sex with just anyone."
Jonas pressed a soft kiss to my lips and smiled. "I think that's admirable." He said. "That you didn't succumb to the peer pressure but waited for the right person. And I'm honoured that you consider me to maybe be the right person."
My face lit up with a smile and I blushed again. "You always know what to say, don't you?"
He laughed and shook his head slightly. "I'm just talented like that."
I snorted in amusement and turned my head away from him, watching the rain drops run down on the other side of the car window.
It was so peaceful around here. No traffic, no rush. It felt like we were the only two people in the world. Two teenagers, cocooned up in their own little space, just enjoying each other's presence.
"I want you to know that I can wait." Jonas spoke up after a while and I returned my eyes to his face. "I can wait until you are ready, no matter how long it will take."
"Thank you."
"There is no pressure." He added and pushed a strand of my hair out of my face. "I'm your boyfriend and I love you and I want you to enjoy it."
I stiffened and blinked at him.
Did he realise that he had just told me he loved me?
Jonas stopped playing with my hair and furrowed his eyebrows at me. "What is it? Did I say something wrong?"
"You just said 'I love you' to me." I pointed out.
"Ja, because I do." He explained in confusion. "Why? Is that a problem?"
"Nei, I just-" I couldn't help but smile widely. Jonas loved me. Like straight up, really loved me. My heart was fluttering in my chest. "It's just that we haven't yet said it like that, officially, so..." I trailed off and looked at him.
"Oh." He pressed his lips together, then he shrugged. "Well then, now I have. I love you."
I pulled his face closer to mine and kissed him passionately.
"Do you know how happy you make me?" I whispered and kissed him again. "I love you too."
Jonas mirrored my expression and smiled against my lips. "Do you know how happy you make me?" He asked.
I pulled back and laughed, my hand still playing with the hair on the nape of his neck.
Jonas grinned broadly and traced his fingers along my lips.
"I love you, Lilliana Vossberg."
"Therese." I mused and he raised a brow. "My middle name."
"I love you, Lilliana Therese Vossberg." He corrected himself and chuckled under his breath.
"I love you too, Jonas Noah Vasquez."
He kissed me again, before laying back down on his back next to me.
For a moment we were both silent, listening to the others breathing, relishing in each others presence and the knowledge that we were loved. At least I was. I still didn't know how to read Jonas' mind, he was too much of a miracle to me.
"Coming back to the topic we started this conversation with." He softly spoke. "There's nothing you need to be scared of."
Well, good luck with that.
"I'll be anxious, no matter what." I said and smiled at him. "But you're a great boyfriend for making me feel better."
Jonas grinned. "As I said;" He started. "We will do it when you want to. And as long as you keep talking to me about what you like and don't like, this can't go wrong."
"Okay, I'll keep talking to you." I mused and he rolled his eyes.
"We're good about this now though?"
I nodded and pressed my lips against his for a quick kiss. "Ja, we are, takk."
"Bra." He smirked. "Now tell me what your book is about."
"My book?"
"Ja, the thing you've buried your nose in for the past three hours." He pointed towards the book to my left.
"It's a about these humanlike creatures that live in caves underground. The cave network spreads across the whole globe and it's about 12.000 kilometres underground. The caves are huge. Then this guy who is a tour guide in Nepal and his group get into a storm and have to hide in the caves. They find this corpse with weird tattoos and a ring in the neck and then they run out of food and water and go further down into the caves."
"Are they stupid?" Jonas groaned and facepalmed. "Why don't they just leave?"
"The entrance is locked from all the snow." I explained. "They go deeper into the caves and then they meet these creatures, called Hadals, and they sacrifice and kill everyone in the group besides the tour guide. He's taken as a slave. There's a jump in time and years later, humans try to explore the caves and research more about the Hadals. The military gets involved and everything. They try to fight the Hadals but they're really quick and have claws and wings. That's where I'm at."
"What's it called again?" Jonas scrunched up his face. "The book, I mean?"
"The Descent by Jeff Long." I said and picked up the book.
"Read it to me."
"Read it to you?" I asked incredulously.
"Ja, read it to me." He nodded and rested his head near my shoulder. "It'll be our book. Like other people have a show or a film. We have a book."
"Well, we could have chosen a happier book." I snorted and got comfortable on the bed in the back of the car again.
"We're stuck in the middle of nowhere and it's raining. This is the only book we have." Jonas retorted. "This is our book."
"Fine." I sighed and started reading. "'What else did he tell you?' Ike felt-"
"Who's Ike?" Jonas interrupted me and I groaned.
"The tour guide. They freed him and now he's part for the military science search program. Now shut up."
"Oh, okay. Fine."
————————
Hei, you guys,
This is not that good of a chapter, I know.
I hope you still liked it.
Vote and comment your opinion. Thank you so much.
I'll talk to you soon.
Ria xxx