Lies in the Dark - Tove Lo
Harry
"Em, babe I didn't mean right this instant." I stutter along as her grip on my hand tightens and she begins to guide us through the crowd.
What the hell am I saying?
Thankfully Emma doesn't pay me any mind as she continues to pull me through the horde of people on the dancefloor and toward an all too familiar looking dark corner of the club.
"Emma please... just," what the fucking hell am I doing!? Shut the fuck up!
Here I am being dragged across the room by the girl of my dreams, what more reassurance do I need?
None! You need none you wanker!
Don't second guess this!
And still.
My girl must sense my hesitation.
Suddenly, she turns around, pulls me against her chest, tangles her free fingers through my hair, and latches her lips to mine.
My whole body fires off sparks.
Unlike the kiss we shared this morning, this kiss is full of passion and need. Emma is in control, guiding the kiss and it's intensity the way she wants it.
Thankfully she doesn't waste a minute slipping her tongue between my lips and deepening the kiss. Instinctively I forget about the room full of people around us and wrap my arm around her waist, holding her tightly against me.
If you told me this morning that today would end with us making out in the middle of the dance floor, even I would have bet against us. But here we are, clutching to the other as our lips devour each other.
With a gentle tug on my hair, I moan into the kiss only to moan even more when she goes into suck on my bottom lip, letting it snap back a moment later.
I am completely taken with her, so completely under her spell that I will do just about anything she wants to do and be happy with whatever that is.
Emma pulls back, both our breaths heavy and forced due to what we were just doing.
"Tonight I'm yours and you're mine right?" She asks me, you eyes staring down at my lips.
I want to argue and beg her to just relent and be with me fully for the rest of time but I know that it's a fool's errand to bring it up now.
With a slow deep breath, I nod.
A smile crosses her lips, albeit slightly tentative, as Em begins to pull the two of us through the club again, seeking some much needed privacy.
Even with the crowd, it doesn't take long to reach our dark and hidden destination. I have no idea how she knew where to go but I'm a bloody lucky man that she did.
Hastily she pushes me against the wall and plants her lips right on mine again and my entire body ignites with the new sensation. If it was difficult for me not to get excited before as she ground her ass against me, feeling her like this, hips to hips, is definitely worse... in the best way possible of course.
My grip tightens and I pull her waist against mine as our lips mold together in the most exquisite and intoxicating way.
Fuck, my girl is amazing and so willing... dare I say too willing?
We're both drunk here, not black out drunk but neither of us are in the right state of mind to make a decision. I should try and stop this and make absolutely sure that this, her and me like this, is what Em really wants.
I have messed up so badly recently the last thing I want to do is keep the streak going.
But then again if I do stop this it, might end up making things worse anyway.
Regretfully I pull back and see that beautiful face that I have dreamed about my entire life. Her eyes are closed and her lips are still puckered, blinding looking for mine. Emma doesn't let that stop her as she leans in and starts placing kisses at the crease of my neck.
I have always loved when she does this and I believe she knows exactly what she is doing. It might make me sound soft but I nearly keel over at the sensation. And yet with everything in me wanting to continue this...
I don't know if it's the alcohol or some sober thought that I have somewhere in the far carner of my mind, but I can't stop myself from voicing my concern.
"Em..."
Nothing.
"Emma don't you think we should talk about this?" I say breathlessly, the war in my mind brewing beyond control.
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
At my words she stops her assault on my neck, resting her forehead on my shoulder as I hear her huff in frustration. Whether that be liquor induced or my abrupt behavior I don't know...
Who am I kidding, it's definitely me.
I keep my hands loosely on his waist and wait for her to say something.
Right now I am just enjoying having her so close, having her in my arms, feeling her breath hit my skin, and everything else that is happening right now. I should be the first one to speak but I just don't.
In all honesty, although I want it, I don't need sex... I just need her.
"Harry" she states firmly, her forehead still resting against my collarbone. "Do you want this tonight or do you want to talk? You can't have both.
"I just don't want you to hate me more tomorrow morning than you do now." I admit, my heart hammering in my chest, I'm sure she can feel it.
Believe me, I want this to happen just as much as she doesn't want to talk to me but I don't think I can take much more of Em hating me. I know she does even though she hasn't said the words.
Of course I heard Emma when she said she loved me earlier but that doesn't mean she doesn't despise me and the situation we're in.
Slowly she pulls her head back, her crystal blue eyes slowly peering up at me, even in heels she considerably shorter and I love it.
Fuck it, I love her!
"Harry I... I could never hate you." With a soft chuckle she looks down between us and I wish more than anything to see her eyes still but she doesn't give me the pleasure. Instead she leans into my chest. "There are a lot of things between us... a lot of dark relentless stuff that just seems to weigh us down and keep us apart, probably for good reason but that doesn't mean I don't..."
Slowly Emma pulls back her head and I finally see that she's biting her lip, nervous about what she's about to say, the three words that I know are just on her lips. I only wish I could have showed Em that she has, and never had for the matter, anything to worry about. But I did an abysmal job and now she's nervous to tell me what she feels.
It shouldn't be like this. Expressing feelings, although nerve wracking beyond measure at times, should get easier. The words should flow seamlessly because although there are nerves you also know that it's a safe place.
Right going Harry you selfish and unfeeling prat. The love of your life is nervous and it is all on you mate.
"It doesn't mean that I'm not in love you."
My heart literally soars in my chest, the warmth of her words pulsing through every single vein in my body. I feel like I am floating as a subtle smile creeps across my lips.
I go to respond, tell her I love her more than I could ever express fully but Em beats me too it and what she says completely throws me for a loop.
"I should have told you sooner."
Not what I was expecting.
You see the thing is Em is an incredibly stubborn woman. Very rarely does she relent and say that she was wrong but here we are. Emma is taking responsibility for something that we both did. I know I should stop it but she doesn't let me.
"We probably wouldn't be in this situation if I had but..." then her demeanor changes, the passion that was once her only expression suddenly blended with a soft irritation that terrifies me to no end. "Well if you would have just been patient like I bloody well asked you to be on your birthday we definitely wouldn't be in this mess but... anyway, now we're here and you have a choice to make."
I watch her, mesmerized, as she takes a deep breath and waits. Her eyes are still a little glassy and her skin is flushed, both signs of all that she's had to drink tonight but I don't see any hesitation. Em knows what she wants and isn't wavering in the slightest.
"Harry, I want you..." her tone telling me she's only talking about right here and right now. She's serious, tonight is all we have for sure. "Do you... do you want me?"
What the hell is taking me so long!?
All the signs are there. Emma Parker is fully in this and she's just waiting for my impatient ass to finally decide.
So I do.
I spin her round, pinning Em against the wall and dive right in the kiss her neck. With the new found confidence Em gave me and the alcohol taking control once again, I start to gently suck her earlobe, kiss her neck, and squeeze her sides hoping this is making her feel good.
When I hear her moan and tug on my hair I know I'm on the right track.
Emma's whole body shivers as I trail kisses up her neck along her jaw. She tastes exquisite. The very thought that I had eyes for any other woman is just astounding to me.
What the hell was I ever thinking?
For a single moment I pull back and tangle my fingers in her hair, feeling the softness of the strands on my fingertips. I kiss her deeply, passionately. Without asking permission I slip my tongue between her lips to meet hers and she follows suit.
There is no way our bodies could get any closer but I still try. In the same motion, I pull her too me and push my body against her. Like a well working machine we angle our heads to get even deeper, feel each other more, want each other more.
Slowly, I feel her wrap a leg around mine, anchoring herself to me and as her pelvis grinds with mine I get completely lost.
I know she can feel it, it's blatantly obvious and incredibly uncomfortable and one thing becomes very clear.
Nothing, absolutely nothing is going to stop this. Not me, not Em, not any element of the universe... this is happening and we both want it to.
A switch flips in my brain and I need my gorgeous girl right now. Every single nerve is pulling me to her. I'm itching to kiss her, taste her, feel her in the most intimate way.
Without any discussion I pull back and watch mesmerized as Emma's chest rises and falls at an intense rate, just as haggard as mine, and I know that a dark corner is not enough.
I take her hand and pull her toward where I believe the loos are, Em more than happy to follow.
A giggle erupts from deep within her, it's the most perfect sound. "Harry, wrong way." And with one strong pull Emma has got us stumbling in the opposite direction, the right direction.
Surprisingly there isn't a line, or if there is, we completely disregard it as we slip into one of the empty singles.
The irony is not lost on me. This isn't our first sexual encounter in a restaurant bathroom and the familiar feeling is just enough to make my already ignited mind to go wild.
Emma steps back until she's leaning against the wall. Not a word is passed between us as I stand before her.
Gently, I push the loose hair behind her ear and cup her face in my hands.
The air between us has drastically changed. The pure passion that was between us before is still there but there is a sense of longing present as well, the love that we feel for one another. I lean in until my lips make contact with hers and I kiss a trail along her jaw and to her ear.
It might be cheeky of me but there is one thing I want, one thing I want more than anything, one thing that has been playing on my mind since she stepped out of the bathroom in this dress.
"I want to taste you baby... so badly."
Emma
"I want to taste you baby... so badly."
My breath hitches in my throat and it becomes painfully clear, to me at least, that I wouldn't be standing if Harry wasn't pressed up against me.
He presses his nose against my neck, probably trying to entice a response from me but my head gets the better of me and no words come to mind.
So instead I push my fingers through his hair and hold him right where he is, reveling in the closeness.
This is just impossible. How can this be happening again? Not that I don't want it to but still.
Of course the last time we found ourselves in a public bathroom Harry was refusing to kiss me and his magical fingers were the only contact we had but it certainly feels the same.
What the hell am I doing?
What the hell am I letting happen right now?
My body is more than willing, it's practically screaming at me to let this happen and (lucky for the both of us) my heart and mind are quickly coming to terms and enjoying what's taking place between us.
"Em..." my name passes through his lips with such ease and certainty. I can't help but nod.
Unfortunately he doesn't kiss me, but before I can protest, worried that he's going to start that no kissing thing he did the last time, he takes control.
Slowly Harry sinks down to his knees, dragging his fingertips along my sides and kissing his way along my body until he is right where we both want him.
With each kiss, with each touch, I grow more and more weak.
I thread my fingers through his short hair and hold on as he places a few firm kisses against my clothed thigh.
How can it be possible that a simple kiss like this digs out such a reaction?
At each spot he kisses, my body warms. The feeling only gets more intense as he slowly pulls the hem of her dress up and holds it at my waist. And suddenly what I was feeling before seems so silly, a mere blip on the radar compared to right now.
Lina would absolutely kill me if she knew what was happening. Hell a sober me would just about bite my head off if she was present but obviously there is no sober part of me in control right now.
It's not that I don't know what's going on. Fuck Harry's head is nearly stuck between my legs, I certainly know what's going on but make no mistake, this wouldn't not be happening if either of us were sober.
Harry's warm lips start their tantalizing assault against my skin, rounding to the inside of my thigh and up and dangerously close to my throbbing core. But like the cheeky boy he is, his lips don't make contact.
"Harry," I moan, gently tugging on his short curls, begging him to just give in. "Stop teasing me."
This is so bad, this is such a mistake but I'm so turned on, we both are and it would just be cruel to not give in right? We aren't meant to be together but we can't deny the clear chemistry that radiates between us.
Or maybe I don't need to completely sever what Harry and I have. Is it ridiculous to consider a friends-with-benefits type of thing?
Shit, shit, shit... I wouldn't even be thinking about this if I hadn't drank half the bars supply today and didn't have Harry's head hovering dangerously close to the apex of my legs now.
Just stop thinking and let it happen woman!
If I was in a soberer state of mind I would probably be painfully aware that we are in the loo at a bloody club. Thankfully it's a single and not some dingey stall but still. Just on the other side of the door is probably a growing line and we are in here and Harry is on his knees about to put his lips on me.
Oh god.
In response Harry rounds his palms to the back of my legs, holding me steady as he nudges his nose against my skin. I can feel the smirk on his mouth. I'd normally be angry at this and if I let my anger of what's happened between us recently get to me I'd scold him for it but with the way I'm feeling I can't utter a single word against him.
I peer down and Harry's eyes are staring right up at me with that special glint in his eye. He has a plan and I am so freakin' excited to know what it is.
With that boyish smile of his, it's intent to really get to me... (he succeeds), Harry drapes the skirt of my dress over his head so he is hidden from my gaze, rendering me completely blind to his movements.
It's exciting and feels so wrong but it must be right. Right? –– okay I'm definitely still drunk but I know exactly what's happening and more so, I want it to happen.
Harry's touch not only gets my heart pumping and creates goosebumps whenever there is contact, but it means so much. This intimacy with him is so intense and pleasurable that it's worlds better than any feeling pursued by any other man.
It's Harry, all Harry.
"Harry" I sigh as he rubs his palms up and down my thighs, taking his time to trace the outline of my panties peppering kisses just below my bellybutton.
I'm squirming like loon it's embarrassing. You would be too if you had his head stuck between your thighs like this.
And still he doesn't go in for the kill. Rather he lingers on the inside of my thigh, gently sucking on the skin there before inching further up, dangerously close to where I want him but never quite making it.
Cheeky bastard.
"Harry I swear if you don't–" but I don't even get to finish my threat.
Right as I start to speak he kisses me right on my covered core and fireworks erupt in my belly. There isn't any lip to skin contact but with only that thin piece of lace blocking our joint need, my mind goes wild with memories and anticipation of what is about to come.
He hums against me, signaling his own enjoyment as he nudges his lips against me further.
Again and again he kisses me, pressing harder against me only making me want more.
My fingers grip tighter on the back of his head, his face still hidden, and my knees just about buckle at the assault. It's almost too much but it's nowhere near the end.
I know that.
He knows that.
We both want it... so... fucking... badly.
Harry's long fingers link around the waistband of my panties and he pulls them down my leg slowly, never peeking his head out from under my skirt but I know he is blushing with glee and excited himself.
His excitement was very evident a few minutes ago as he ground his erection against me, I can't imagine how painful it must be now.
Normally I would attempt to make this a joint pleasure thing but I am so fully under his spell I can't think about anything but his lips that are about to be on me.
Delicately I step out of my panties as Harry pulls them away. I have no idea what the hell he does with them and right now I don't even care.
Before I can even process that I am completely bare, Harry's lips are back on me, completely devouring me. Kissing me over and over again.
And then he releases his tongue on me and I am a complete goner.
He's slow and then he's quick. Harry and his magical tongue is all over the place.
In one long slow stroke Harry drags his tongue up the full length of my sex. My entire body shivers under his grasp making him grip my bum and me, not even caring how I might hurt him, pull on his hair trying to steady myself.
Then he moans against me.
Maybe it did hurt or better yet, he enjoyed it.
I couldn't care less as long as he continues his tantalizing assault on my throbbing arousal and thankfully he does everything but stop.
Don't think he cares if I tug too hard with the way Harry is unleashing his tongue on me. Plus he can hardly blame me if I do pull his hair with the way his magical tongue is working me over. I can't help but lean my head back against the wall and see stars.
And then, sparks flying all over the place, he nudges his tongue inside me... over and over again, not showing any mercy whatsoever, I can only imagine what he's thinking, how happy he is at the moment.
And I am feeling the exact same.
With his head between my thighs and his hands wrapped around the back of my legs, I hunch over, pressing him to me in the hope to get more of his magical tongue.
"Ah fuck..." I say breathlessly, feeling the effects of Harry's touch not only at the point of contact but through my entire fucking body.
I'm completely consumed by him... heart, body, and mind.
And then, right when I don't think I can take anymore he seamlessly guides his long finger inside me, never missing a beat with his tongue.
"Oh god" and as he slowly pumps inside as his tongue draws mindless but frequently shapes over my most sensitive spot, I completely explode.
I try to remain calm as I ride out my orgasm but it's completely useless to even try. I cry out, more than thankful that the clubs loud music is probably masking our elicit activities.
But Harry doesn't stop.
Suddenly he adds a second finger and without giving me time to adjust he immediately curls his ring covered fingers in a come hither motion and dragging them along my wall, sending shockwaves through my entire being and pushing me over the edge yet again.
It is so intense, so mind blowing that I can hardly even breathe.
Once he's guided me through, Harry finally takes pity on me and pulls away, placing one final kiss on my skin and pulling back.
When I finally look down, Harry has the biggest most satisfied grin on his face, his lips glistening with my arousal. Slowly, with a smirk written all over his face, he brings his fingers to his mouth and sucks them clean.
Holy fuck.
A moment later Harry retracts his other hand lets the fabric fall down my legs, making sure the fabric is smoothed out before he stand up.
I want to be in the moment, I want to just look at him and only think about the rest of the night but something else is playing on my mind.
Confusion.
I know I am no expert when it comes to relationships but I can't understand how can someone who can make me feel this good also hurt me so badly. How can I let him and how can I do the exact same thing to him?
Thankfully Harry doesn't let me think about it any further has his fingers tangle in my now thoroughly messy hair and kisses me gently.
His lips slid over mine with not a hint of urgency. It's slow and steady and safe.
I love him. I really do love him.
Right now I have no clue what's going to happen between us. I want him and yet I can't look past everything that's happened.
But I'm going to stick to my word. We said one night and that's what we are going to have. One night, this night, now and it feels like enough... and if it manages to slip into tomorrow morning then so be it.
Harry pulls back and I am met with those beautiful green eyes of his, I can't help but smile.
Tonight, we have tonight.
"Let's get out of here."
___
A/N: Couldn't resist with those two images. ;-)
Really hope you enjoyed the chapter. I thought it was time these two deserved a break, as well as you guys, my lovely readers!
As always comment to your hearts content! Reading them is such a joy, I'd love to hear what you guys have to say.
As always thank you for the support on Harry and Emma's story! It still amazes me that people actually care about these two and take the time to read my story. It's seriously insane and I am so grateful to each and every one of you!
Lots more to come.
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All the love, C.