I sat on the edge of my bed, my head in my hands.
There was always a constant worry in my head. It would tell me Ryan wasn't coming back from anything. Not after last time...
I will admit, I had grown more than attached to him. Though I didn't want to admit that I cared for him more than I should've, I couldn't ignore it. Since the start, I found myself falling for Ryan more. I just wish I knew what I was getting myself into at the time...
At the sound of my bedroom window opening and closing, I stood up, my eyes wide as I watched Ryan step forward with a cut forehead and bloody nose.
I was quick to grab a few wipes and make my way back to him.
He tried swatting my hands away, but eventually gave in.
After wiping the blood away and covering his forehead with a small bandaid, I stepped back from him.
"What happened this time?"
"A few kids from school stopped by..."
I raised a hand and rested it on his cheek. "You can't let people walk all over you, Ryan."
He shook his head, stepping forward, "I can't lash out either. Everything I know is slowly falling, and I'm going down with it."
I leaned up and pressed my lips to his. "I won't let you. Okay? I'm not going to let you go down for this."
Ryan took another step forward, catching my lips before I could make any sort of move.
I hadn't gotten used to us, if I'm honest. It felt weird to be kissing him, but it was also the best thing I had ever felt. He made my insides turn. If only he knew I cared about him more than he thought...
Ryan placed his hands on my hips and walked us back to the bed, slowing lying me down without breaking the kiss.
He hovered over me, tilting his head to deepen the kiss.
My hands made their way to his shirt, slowly unbuttoning it.
Ryan pulled away, taking the rest off for me before unzipping my hoodie and taking that off me.
Ryan and I... we had many make-out sessions, but none of them were this slow. He was taking his time, and was running his hands down my body as if I was glass... I loved the feeling, though.
With a small sigh, Ryan pulled away. "I don't want this to..."
I tried to give him a comforting smile. "I trust you."
Instead of answering, Ryan dipped his head, connecting our lips once again.
I was so hypnotised by everything, I completely forgot where we were going. I couldn't deny that this was the best feeling I'd ever had, though. I also couldn't deny that my feelings towards Ryan grew by the second. How could I not see this before?
Slowly pulling away, Ryan sighed, resting his forehead against mine. "I..."
He shook his head before closing his eyes, lightly pressing his lips to mine.
His touch was so... it was like he wasn't even touching me. He acted as if I was a sheet of silk and his fingers were knives...
I brought his body closer to mine, kissing him back a littler harder.
This had to have been the first for him, too. I mean... With how careful and slow, and caring he was, this had to have been his first. I was his first... Just as he was mine.