Chapter 35: What about the lies?
Autumns P.O.V
I just stared at him.
The stupid words rang in my mind all night. Really, I haven't gone back to sleep. I've been up all night- or morning- thinking about Dylan's words.
'Sex Alexis, we had sex...'
They had sex. Like sex.
Dammit, Autumn stop repeating it.
Okay....
It hurt. It really hurt. Really bad. All night I've been asking my self questions.
How?
Why?
What?!
But, as always, I gave myself hope. I mean Dylan was drunk, maybe he didn't know what he was talking about. Do I have hope that Dylan didn't do what I think he did, yeah.
But...if he did, does that mean he doesn't doesn't love me? I think my heart tore apart just thinking about it.
Dylan was laying on my bed, all sprawled out. He didn't have trouble falling asleep yesterday but I certainly did.
Maybe I was over reacting. Seriously, I may have shed a few tears.
Doesn't matter....
Dylan stirred on my bed and I watched as his eyes opened. "Oh, God." He held his head and slowly sat up on the bed.
His head was probably pounding. Well, my freaking hearts pounding.
He looked around the room confused and his gaze caught me, sitting on my spinny chair.
I gave him a tight smile, trying not to show my true emotions. "Hi."
Dylan just looked at me. "Hey." He said slowly. "Um, what-"
"You kind of showed up last night, you know wasted, so I just let you sleep here." I told him.
He nodded his head. "I didn't-you know, I wasn't an ass, right?" He asked quietly.
I shook my head. Nope, you may have just sent my heart into shock. "No. How are you feeling?" I asked standing up.
"I'm fine." Dylan replied swinging his legs over the edge of the bed.
"I have aspirin in the bathroom, I'll go get it for you." I told him.
He smiled. "Thanks, baby girl." I walked to the bathroom and got the pills. When I walked back out, Dylan was sitting with his elbows on his knees and he was holding his face.
I pursed my lips. Here goes nothing. "Hey, Dylan?" He looked up and I handed it to him.
"Thanks." He sighed as he took it.
"Mmhmm, no problem. Just one question....did you sleep with Alexis last night?"
Dylan almost choked on the water that he was currently drinking. I just looked at him, and when he recovered from his coughing fit, he looked up at me. "What?" He asked.
"Did you sleep with Alexis?" I repeated, eyeing him carefully.
He shook his head. "No, why the hell would I do that?" I just looked at him carefully.
He could be lying.
But what if he's not?
He seems pretty serious.
Well, what if he's a good liar?
But, I believe him. He said he didn't, so he didn't, right?
Plus, why should it matter if he did? He's not your boyfriend.
But, you want him to be.
Okay, just shut up.
"Okay." I said quietly after my silence.
Dylan looked at me weirdly. "Okay." He repeated.
I shrugged. "Okay." I said again quietly.
Dylan had a ghost of a smile on his face now. "You're a weird girl, you know that Autumn?" There was humor in his voice.
I shrugged again with a small smile. "Okay." Dylan chuckled before I turned away to get ready.
Dylan.
I believed him.
~•~
Okay, you know as a teenager, some kids want to go to college because it'll be awesome and you have freedom when really, it's torture.
So. Much. Work.
I walked out of my phycology session and I believe it was about two o'clock. I'm hungry so, Matt said that he would meet me at the Thai food place.
Matt and I are cool. Just friends. Plus, even if he did have the slightest feelings for me when he arrived at stone Brook- seriously doubt it- they're definitely over because he's been a real flirt to every girl that walks his way. I think it's actually kind of cute and funny.
When I entered the Thai place, Matt was already sitting and he was talking on the phone. When I sat down he looked at me and smiled.
I think he was talking to his mother because he doesn't like to speak Spanish unless he's around family.
Yes, Matt is Hispanic and apparently I have interest in boys from all parts of the world except America.
'Tengo que ir a la mama.......okay, bye, te amo."
Matt looked at me. "What up, Autumn."
I shrugged. "Well, I just took my final test for my phycology course and I almost died having an anxiety attack." I told him honestly.
Matt just laughed at me. "I'm sure you did great. Don't even worry about it."
I sighed. "I guess you're right. But, I'm starving. Let's go order."
"Actually, I already got your food. Satay chicken, right." He handed me the container and sighed thankfully.
"Ugh, Matt, your a life saver. Now, I don't have to talk to people." He laughed as I started to eat my food. "Did you go to Jessie's party?" I asked him with my mouth full.
Matt made a face at me. "It was actually Jacobs party, and yes I did go. I'm assuming you were in your room-"
"Studying." I finished for him with a smile. Matt just looked down at his food and nodded.
Something changed. His whole mood just....dropped.
"Matt, you okay?" I asked quietly studying him.
"What do you mean?"
"You're whole face just dropped. Sort of like you were told you're never gonna meet J-lo." I said.
Matt gave a light chuckle and shook his head. "No, I'm fine."
"Tell me. Tell me. Tell me. Tell me. Tell me. Tell me. Tell me. Tell me-"
"Autumn, relax." Matt cut me off with a smile. "Really, nothing's wrong."
I squinted my eyes at him. "Liar. I know there something going on, but I won't push you. Because im a caring person."
Matt mumbled something about someone else not caring but I just ignored it.
Just one question, what the hell is going on with Matt.
~•~
I was walking to Roosevelt Hall where Dylan's dorm was. He and I were gonna hang out for the rest of the day.
Lately, Dylan's been very....I don't know the word. He's not clingy but he sure likes to be around me. I think it's the most adorable thing in the world. He's like a little baby.
Also, he likes to cuddle. Like a lot. We'd spend most of our nights with us laying down and I'd be in his arms while he'd bury his nose in my cheek. He's so cute.
However, ever since that night in Miami, I don't know if we're dating or not. He hasn't made it clear to me and I'm really lost. I mean, I love him- I really do-, and he told me he loves me.
Where does that leave us?
"Hey, Amanda!" I halted. I knew that voice, and even though, that's not my name, she was obviously talking to me.
Alexis.
Did I want to see her right now?
'Sex Alexis, we had sex...'
Stop it, Autumn. Okay, Dylan said that he didn't do it. I believe him. I have hope, remember?
I turned around and there was Alexis. She was actually dressing quite modest today. Her green eyes bore into mine and and she wore that stupid half smirk half smile. It was almost teasing, I hated it.
"Oh my god, Amanda, your hair looks so much better straightened." She took a lock of it and ran I through her fingers. I stepped back from her.
"It's Autumn." I told her with my eyebrows raised.
How is it that sometimes she got my name right, and sometimes she got it wrong? Right right," she started. "Everyone's talking about you and Dylan; that you guys are dating. Is that true?"
"Why would I tell you; and why would it matter anyway?" I crossed my arms.
"Oh, I just didn't think you guys were. You know, Dylan's not the type to play two girls at once."
I looked at her cautiously. "What do you mean?"
Alexis raised her eyebrows. "Wow, I thought you would notice. Who do think was dying to get to him everyday down In Florida. Dylan insisted that call him often."
Okay, maybe that was half true. What if it was Alexis calling him? "You're bluffing." I squinted my eyes at her.
"Oh am I? I would gladly show you.....," Alexis trailed off. "And I'm guessing he didn't tell you about the party."
"What party?" I asked, my voice was suddenly quiet and my heart started to beat faster.
Alexis paused for a moment like she was contemplating something. "The one last month, of course." She smirked.
Matt's party. Wait, but that meant Dylan really.... "That's right, Autumn. We slept together." She said in a mocking tone.
There it goes. My heart. Literally, it just exploded in my chest. "You should've known better. Me and Dylan belong together. He wanted me. He will always want me." With that, Alexis heels sounded my ears as she walked away.
Love sucks. Now I can say the same about hope.
~•~
I laid in my bed with my lips between my teeth. I was holding the stuffed panda Tyler got for me a long time ago.
I was just thinking about......it. Everything, I don't know!
It just bothers me so much, it's literally killing my poor sweet heart.
I turned to the door when I heard the lock being messed with. The door opened, and in walked an urgent Dylan.
He looked at me with widened eyes. "Autumn what the-"
"Did you just pick my lock?" I asked with furrowed eyebrows.
He nodded his head. "Yeah, your not answering your phone and you were suppose to meet me an hour ago. I thought something happened to you, what the hell?"
Ignored him and the fact that he actually cared. He lied.
I wasn't mad, no. I just wanted to know why he lied.
"Autumn?" Dylan walked up to me. "Autumn, what's wrong?"
I looked up at him. "Why did you lie to me?" I asked quietly.
Dylan just looked at me. He didn't say anything. He knew damn well what I was talking about. "Autumn, just-"
"Don't even try to pull any bull Dylan, okay, I've heard it twice. And I wasn't sure until just now, when nothing came out your mouth." I stood up.
"Just let me explain, Autumn."
"Explain what? What could be a possibly good reason that you lied?" I crossed my arms.
"Listen, last night I was drunk, okay. I'll admit I-"
"Wait," I cut him off quietly. "Last night? Im talking about Matt's party, what the hell are you talking about?" I asked confused.
Dylan made a face and remained silent. That's when his words played over in my head. "Oh my gosh, you slept with her last night too!" I accused him.
There goes my heart. Again. Or whatever pathetic piece there is left of it. "Okay, yes I lied." Dylan sighed.
I shook my head and my arms. "You told me- this morning- I believed you." I pointed a finger at him. "I believed you then too, you know why because I trust you Dylan."
"Okay, yes Autumn, but don't you think you're over reacting? It was last month." Both of our voices started to get louder.
"I'm not angry because you slept with her Dylan, maybe hurt but, it's not the first time- I'm a big girl I can get over it. Im mad that you felt you had to lie to me, I feel like I've been played!"
"Played, how?! Okay, Autumn it's not that big of a deal. Can't you just drop it?"
"I'm not going to drop it because I feel like everything you did was a lie now!" How could I just drop it.
I don't understand how a person could tell someone that they love them and make them feel so special and now I feel so terrible because all this time he made me feel like that, he was also doing the same to another. It feels disgusting.
Dylan expression turned into a hard one. "Listen Autumn, you can say that I lied about whatever the hell you want but you need to know that I am in love with you." Dylan said in a low menacing voice.
"Are you really?" I asked tilting my head. I know he did, it just didn't feel the same, though.
"I am." He nodded. "But right now, you're treating things bigger than they need to be. It's not that important, you're being over dramatic."
I raised my eyebrows. "I'm being dramatic? I'm being dramatic? Okay, says the one that over reacts to things that he doesn't need to; worries about things that he needs to let go."
"What's that suppose to mean?" His expression became defensive.
"I mean, you hold onto things that are not even that serious."
Dylan sighed and he looked...angry. "You know what, maybe I meant it." He mumbled.
"What do you mean?" I asked. Both of our tempers were on the line and I'm pretty sure we both just wanted to walk away from this whole conversation.
"I mean, what if I wanted to sleep with her. After all, this is how it's suppose to be right? If you think it's a big deal, Autumn, I can make it a big deal." Dylan was now right in front of me and looking me directly into my eyes.
"Okay, yes, I slept with her. And guess what, I liked it. In fact, it was the best feeling in the world. She may be what everyone thinks she is but at least I got a hell lot more out of her than I'll probably get out of you." He said in my face.
My heart dropped into my stomach and all I could do was stare at him. I can't believe he just said that. Tears stung my eyes but I refuse to cry in front of him. If his goal was to hurt me, then he sure as hell succeeded.
"You're such an asshole. You can keep your precious Alexis, get anything you want from her. Just know, I'm happy I didn't sleep with man whore like you." I told him quietly.
"What did you just call me?"
"Man whore, Dylan. Did you hear that?"
Dylan shook his head. "Why'd I know you were gonna be trouble. Why do I even put up with you?!" He screamed.
"Why do I even put up with you?!" I screamed.
"Just stay out of my life!"
"Then promise you'll stay out of mine!"
"Is that what you want!?"
"Is that what you want?!"
Dylan and I were now face to face and I feeling completely broken.
I felt like dropping to the floor and crying. And that's what I did. I felt a tear stroll down my cheek.
I stepped back from Dylan after a while and looked down. "Fine," my voice cracked. "I'll stay out of your life, and you'll stay out of mine." I said softly.
Ignored the rest of the tears that strolled down my face. "Autumn-"
"Get out of my room." I told him quietly.
"Autumn, ju-"
"I said get out!" I screamed. I just watched the floor and I heard Dylan sigh as his footsteps trailed away.
I'll stay out of his, and he'll say out of mine.
What the hell just happened?
What about the laughs and the good memories. What about us?
•••••••••
Okay, this is the longest chapter I've ever written. Almost 2700 words. Once again, I know it's not a lot compared to other book like one of my favorites (TMAHA) but, it's still good.
Anyway, I know the last like was cheesy, but I thought the title reference was funny. Well, the fight.....yeah that happened.
Keep reading to find out what happens next. Bye bye, munchkins. 😝😝