Chapter 22
Nick's POV
I was not afraid of surfing and I was not afraid of the ocean. I was though, slightly concerned for my safety. That does not make me a coward! I almost drowned and got a concussion the last time I was in the water. I think the reason why I'm so worried now is because last time I was with Liz, I knew she wouldn't let anything happen to me, but Blake... well, I felt like as if he wouldn't lift a finger if my life were in danger. Who knows? Maybe that's just me being paranoid.
I truly hesitated for a moment before I followed him into the water; surfboard in hands. He had provided me the same yellow board I had used the last time; the one he had salvaged when the currents brought it back to shore when I had thought it was lost forever.
I didn't know if he gave it to me to ease my nerves because of its familiarity or to put me more on edge because it reminded me of what happened last time. Then again, like I said before, it could just be me being paranoid.
"Ease up, Nick. You're gonna be fine" Blake reassured. A smile clung to his lips while he watched me carefully.
I took a deep breath and nodded.
"I'm fine" I stated. I think I said it more to reassure myself then Blake; though it worked both ways.
"Of course you are. Nothing is going to happen to you on my watch, buddy. Liz would kill me if it did" at the mention of Liz's name I relaxed. It was weird, my body physically reacted to the sound of her name. She was becoming my safety net, one I was beginning to use to feel secure and whole.
It was through that realization that I noticed how I wasn't moping around and being miserable because my family isn't here with me anymore. That was all Liz. She was growing to be someone really important to me, not just a distraction, but something more... meaningful to me. I was starting to care deeply for her. Part of me was intimidated by the growing feelings, the other part felt at peace. As if this is all I want and need at the moment; and it might be the case, I just don't want to jump head first and end up hurt or hurting her. I wouldn't forgive myself if that ever happened.
"Nick, buddy. If you don't want a repetition of what happened last time, I'm going to need you to focus, alright?" Blake's words brought me to the here and now.
I nodded my understanding, and his mouth turned into a half smile. I could never figure him out and he must have known this because he winked as if he could read my mind. I shook my head and thoughts and focused on the task at hand.
"Alright, you're the teacher, so... teach me" I said, while seating on the yellow surfboard; one leg on each side.
Blake closed his eyes, you could see him breathing in the smell of the ocean. His shoulders slumped and relaxed the more deep breaths he took. Then he talked; his voice taking a tremulous tone, probably out of contained excitement. It was almost as if someone completely different was in front of me.
"Think about surfing as if it were your life" he said.
His eyes were still closed and even though he wasn't looking at me, I raised an eyebrow at his statement. I was very interested in knowing where he was going with this.
"Your life may seem a certain way in someone else's point of view, just like you might feel other people's lives are easier compared to yours. But in reality living life is hard for everyone; we all have our own struggles. Right?"
I nodded but remembered his eyes were still closed.
"Yes" I responded.
"Good. Now what did I just tell you?" he asked calmly.
I took a moment to collect my thoughts and answered, "Surfing might look like its easy for some people, as if it didn't take them no effort, but truly, every wave is different; only the person riding it to knows how hard it actually was to ride it?" I was unsure, which is why I made it a question at the end.
"Basically, yeah" Blake replied. This time he sounded more like himself and I realized his eyes were opened again.
"Okay" I said, not knowing what else i could say.
"I'm glad you got it. Now to the next thing".
"In life you need to try new things to find what you really want, or to know what you're capable of doing and/or handling. It's the same with surfing" he explained.
"Because the only way to learn is by trying out some waves" I finished his thought and he smiled widely.
"Exactly! See you're getting the hang of this!" he said, excitedly.
I couldn't help the smile that spread on my lips either; you could tell Blake was very passionate about surfing. Even more so then Liz, and I didn't think that was humanly possible.
"Okay, I think we can start the practical part. Oh wait, one more thing. Remember you are sharing an ocean with things that can hurt you. This can be of course the waves, the currents, rocks or animals. Always remember anything can hurt you. Show the ocean respect, but don't be afraid" his words rung loud and clear, as if the wind picked them up to envelop me with them. I took a deep breath.
"Show respect but don't be afraid. Got it" I repeated.
"You'll be fine, Nick. Just have fun, alright? If you don't get sore and hurt a little then you're not doing it right, I promise" Blake's encouraging words miraculously worked and I felt as ready as I could ever be.
"Now you're ready for surfing" Blake announced.
I didn't say anything while we both paddled farther out into the ocean, where we would wait for the "right" wave to come.
Once there, we watched water lifting itself up. We kept our eyes opened for the wave we would decide to ride. Besides the sound of splashing water and the whooshing of waves scratching the sand at the beach, silence stretched between us. That was of course until I spoke up.
"Thanks for the pep talk. I really do appreciate it" I said in all honesty. I felt eyes watching me and I look beside me at Blake-- who was sitting on a blue and red board-- his green orbs were boring into mine.
"Don't even sweat it" he replied, his voice soft and low in volume. It was almost as if he hadn't been ready or expecting any type of gratitude and didn't know exactly how to react. I smiled at this.
After five minutes passed, I sighed. Waiting wasn't my strong forte. Blake looked at me and smiled.
"Patience is a virtue, my friend. In surfing just like in all aspects of life, it will be rewarded".
I nodded in acknowledgement to his words, and before I could say anything else he whooped.
"Here comes my ride" he uttered. I looked at the horizon, a wave in formation was making its way towards us. I could tell it was going to be a big one. I laughed.
"If I don't get back to you before you ride one yourself, remember that if you see one that you think it's too big or risky, don't ride it. Then again, only ride a wave that you feel it's worth the risk" I didn't have time to reply before he started paddling away from me.
I watched in amazement as Blake rode the wave until he became one and the same with it. A new feeling spurt inside of me. I felt something in me change. I don't know what it was, but I'm sure I will eventually find out.
I averted my eyes from Blake's surfing action to the ocean behind me. I saw a wave forming. I wasn't sure if it would be big or small, i couldn't tell yet; but it was coming and I had no time to think. I knew I wanted to ride that one, I could feel it in my gut.
So before I can start processing what is going on, my hands are moving out of their own accord. I am paddling. My hands pushing the water back with force, propelling me forward in the process. I don't feel the same. Excitement fills me up like if someone were pouring it inside of me like wine on a glass. My breathing becomes labored with the effort I'm making to keep up with the ocean currents. The wave finally catches up to me, and I can feel as it starts lifting my board and consequently my body upward.
I'm ready. I can do this, I know I can.
I'm smiling from ear to ear because I know it.
I jump up and take my position. All I can think is "Yes, I can really do this".
But can I really?
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Surfing expresses ... a pure yearning for visceral, physical contact with the natural world.
-MATT WARSHAW
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A/N: Here it is! Finally! I'm sorry it took me so long. I've been dealing with writer's block and lack of free time to write. If you're still reading, I love you. And don't worry, I know what I want with the story now :)
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