P A I G E
I smiled, watching his chest rise up and down. The bags under his eyes stuck out like a sore thumb. I could tell he hadn't slept in a while.
I felt awful for lashing out on him. If I had known he got like this I would've never yelled at him.
He looked like a saint in the light of the moon. One of the most gorgeous men I had ever laid my eyes on.
Even in his sleep he frowned. Like something was constantly upsetting him. I immediately thought, that frown was because of me.
When I saw him hitting himself it's like every organ in my body screamed at me to stop him. He was calling himself a failure and blaming himself for everything.
I don't know why, but we've been surprisingly nice to one another within the past couple of hours. We've never gotten along.
Now I know what I was missing all this time. This beautiful angel in disguise, Dean Ambrose.
"Sleep well Dean. I'm sorry."
I kissed his forehead and felt his arm tighten around my waist and I chuckled. This felt right. Our bodies fit together like puzzle pieces. Almost like it was meant to be.
It wasn't long before I dozed off into a deep sleep. It was the most sleep I've gotten all week.
8 HOURS LATER
I was awakened by the sound of water running.
I took in my surroundings, noticing I was still in Dean's room. The sun shined brightly into the room, blinding me.
I wanted to leave but I wasn't sure if he was okay yet. There was no way in hell I was leaving him if he still wasn't calm. Even if I didn't like him that much.
I sat up, the covers falling into a heap over my abdomen. The water was still running so I decided I'd leave a note.
'To Dean,
I'll be back. I'm just going to get my things from room. You don't have to explain what happened exactly last night and we don't have to talk about it. Be good while I'm gone.
- Paige
P.S. You're kind of adorable when you sleep ;)'
Why would I say that? Why would I even think of him in that way? I couldn't possibly. I scratched it out heavily with the pen, examining it and making sure you couldn't see it.
It didn't do a very good job so I crossed my fingers he wouldn't see it.
I tumbled out of the bed after noting the sheets smelled like him. Almost like a woodsy scent.
I took Dean's room card off the bedside table and left the room, going to mine.
I nearly jumped out of my skin when I walked in to see Renee sitting on my bed.
"Where were you last night?"
Suddenly, I felt nervous. My palms were clammy. Should I tell her?
"I might've stayed with Dean last night."
Her jaw dropped.
"You what!?"
"Can I please explain later? I have to get back to him. If I'm gone too long he might get scared."
She nodded and I hugged my cheery blonde best friend. I grabbed my bag and rushed back to Dean's room.
I opened the door and I think I almost drooled when I dropped my heavy bag on my foot.
Of course, I would walk in on a freshly showered Dean Ambrose with water droplets running down his defined abs. Did I mention the towel hanging dangerously off his waist?
I gasped, gripping my foot.
"Fuck!"
I knew he was worried when he rushed over, deliberately standing right behind me, pressing his bare chest to my back.
"Are you ok Paige?"
I held my breath as I felt his arm slither around my waist.
"Yeah I'm fine."
He backed away and walked back into the bathroom, probably to change.
I let out the oxygen I forgot I was holding in and crashed against the door. What the hell was happening?
He confused me in every way possible.
"So, I'm adorable when I'm sleeping huh?"
Him and that stupid smirk. I felt like a little kid with his hand caught in the cookie jar.
"I thought you hated me Paige. Why are you still here?"
At first I became angry at that statement, but then I saw how vulnerable be looked.
"I haven't forgiven you for what you've done to me in the past Dean. But you really think I'd let you beat yourself up over this?"
He sighed and held his face in his hands.
"I had to. When you yelled at me to get out I knew you hated me. With a burning passion. I feel awful for everything I've done to you."
"That doesn't mean hit yourself for it! You have no idea how scared I was when I saw you hurting yourself! Dean, I may be angry at you but I still care about you. Why do you do this to yourself?"
I noticed the tear streaks glistening on his stubbled cheeks.
"I have auto-phobia along with avoidant personality disorder Paige."
My eyebrows furrowed.
"What do those mean?"
"Auto-phobia is a fear of being alone or isolated. Avoidant personality disorder is kind of like having social anxiety. I want to be able to talk to people but I'm too embarrassed. I'm afraid of rejection and making a fool of myself. I desire close relationships but I can't ever have them because I'm not stable enough.."
"I'm very insecure and self-loathing. I can't help it that I particularly don't like myself. I get scared that everyone I work with is judging me and I'm afraid none of my "friends" actually like me. I wish I was normal.."
Seeing Dean Ambrose cry was like an angel weeping. Hearing him say these things overwhelmed me and my immediate reaction was to reach out to him.
"Dean-"
"No don't touch me! You don't care so stop acting like you do!"
I sighed and wrapped my arms around him, embracing him. I felt his hands weakly try to push me away which only made me cry harder.
"Dean you don't mean that. I do care about you-"
"No! I'm a ticking time bomb waiting to blow up at any second. I'm destructive Paige! I'm a mistake! I was never meant to walk this earth!"
"I never want to hear you say those words again because from now on, I'm sticking to your side like glue."
He sobbed, trying to fight my words.
"Why Paige? I'm not worth it. My mother even told me I was a failure. I'm far from an angel."
"Well you're my A N G E L."