August 15th 2012
The sound of alarm clocks shrieking throughout the house followed by annoyed groans is what I woke up to today.
Today, the first day of school.
School this summer was obviously the furthest thing from my mind, well like everyone else. But for some reason I don't even feel like a sophomore.
I don't even feel sixteen.
I guess that's what emotional turmoil does to you, it ages you.
Pain ages you.
I've experienced being taken advantage of, wanting to kill my self, a loved one dying, betrayal, losing my mind, falling in love, taking the plunge.
All of that happened in one summer.
Me and Ross had a small discussion last night about the exclusiveness of our relationship, and we both came to a conclusion that it doesn't matter what others think. I love him, he loves me, that is simply all that matters.
Another alarm went off causing me to groan, making Ross stir.
"Babe make it stop." Ross whined causing me to laugh tiredly.
"It's not even our alarm." I argued rubbing his stomach making him stretch out.
"Don't care, as long as it stops."
I rolled my eyes and slipped out of bed despite the fact that Ross tried to keep me there, claiming it'd be cold without me.
"Get your ass up Lynch."
Ross cracked his eyes open and raised his brow.
"You've never said my last name."
I got caught off guard as I thought about it too. "Hmm, you're right, but it's not like you say mine."
Ross shrugged. "Calling out last names always means you're in trouble,"
"Yeah, you are, now get out of bed!" I yanked at the blanket but he pulled back causing me to land on him. "Ass." I barked as he squeezed my upper thigh.
"Don't mind if I do." he quipped taking his hand lower causing me to squeak.
"Hands off already! Just hurry up you're pissing me off." I said bitterly crossing my arms as I turned away from him.
He tried to grab for me again but I retreated towards the closet to avoid him and get dressed.
Once I came into the room it was empty making me sigh in relief.
•••
"My name is Mrs. Fowler and here is your syllabus for this-"
I completely droned out, being drained at the high pitch voice this woman was emitting.
Today has been... an interesting day to say the least.
Everywhere I go, people are staring. It's a strange occurrence considering the fact that people didn't tend to notice me in the past. But it's as if I came to school with a big ole blimp above me.
Now there are many factors that could possibly be contributing to all these glances. My first thought was obviously all of the drama that was surrounding me last year with Britney and everything, but that thought was shut down due to the fact that no one gives a shit, ad Britney now lives in California... Lucky bitch.
Second reason could be Ross. I mean we've been holding hands during passing periods and we shared lunch together and he even kissed me before we parted ways in the morning. It still could be about Ross, because this is a kid whose the schools point guard for the basketball team, he's a freaky genius math wiz, much to my displeasure, he's a big deal at school.
I mean, what if they think he's out of my league because of his social status?
What if he believes them?
"Hey can you pass the papers?"
I jumped as the persons voice beside me perturbed into my thoughts.
"S-sorry." I stammered out, taking one of the syllabus sheets and passing the stack down.
That was a really stupid thought. Why the hell am I so insecure all the sudden?
I looked around the room sizing up the other girls.
He could literally have anyone else.
I sighed shaking my head. "They're probably less problematic too." I muttered.
And the last reason, as to why I could possibly be getting so much attention is one I don't want to be true.
They pity me.
Because I'm the girl who lost her mom, and the image I thought she possessed.
It wouldn't bother me so much if I had lost an actual mom. You know, someone who actually cared for me, someone who deserved to be missed. But it would bother me if they consoled me about a woman who was just feeling dandy about abandoning her kids.
Ugh, and the fact that I have a sister is news that I won't let my brain even process until I've sorted all of this other shit that's bouncing around in my brain.
•••
"Finally!" Piper sighed and threw her backpack across the living room, the living which was filled with kids laying around napping, not even being able to make it to their rooms.
"Come on, I need a cuddle session." Ross whispered in my ear making me blush and laugh.
Ross lead me upstairs, taking my bag and throwing it in the corner of our room.
"I have home-" I shrieked as he lifted me up and set me down on his bed.
"Shut up, just for fifteen minutes, everyone was driving me crazy at school and all I wanted to do was be here with you." He swiftly took his shirt off along with his shoes then plopped down beside me, pulling me towards him.
"Driving you crazy how?" I asked curiously, wondering if he went through the same thing I did.
"Just, people wanting to know what happened between me and you, or where I was the whole summer. It was frustrating because they all had their own goddamn assumptions and most wouldn't even let me get a word in edgewise." He huffed pulling me closer and burying his nose in my neck.
"Well, what did you tell them about us? I was getting looked at funny all day."
Ross brought his face back up to smirk at me. "I told them that we're very much in love and that we're running away to Vegas in two months to elope."
We stared at each other for a second, him smiling, and me glaring.
"Ross!" I bursted out in laughter and he did too. "I was worried all fucking day that some how everyone found out about my mom." I raked my hand through my hair before laughing again.
"You little shit, what am I going to with you?" I kissed his forehead and he smiled at me fondly.
"Love me until the day I die."
"Deal."
•••
Journal Entry: Ross
August 15th 2012
Your asleep, which is good, because I never get the chance to write since you're always around.
Which isn't bad, god no, it the greatest thing in the world.
Anyways, I had to write because just mere minutes ago you made a promise.
Well, who knows if it even meant anything to you, I mean we're just teenagers, what the fuck do I know about love other than the fact that looking at you is better than any sunset.
You promised to love me until the day I die.
We were just being silly, but when you said "deal" it brought a feeling that made me want to dance like a dork or just create something in your honor.
But I just have to settle with writing something with my non-dominant hand, as you are sleeping on my right arm.
But this shitty hand writing looks pretty great.
Caspian,
I promise to love you until the day you die.
No matter where we end up or what happens, I could never forget the way you've made me feel.
I love you so much.
R.S.L.
•••••
HI YOU GUYS I KINDA RUSHED THIS ONE, I HOPE IT'S GOOD.
But I have been nominated in @TheFanFicAward for best Ross lynch fanfiction and I'd appreciate it if you guys would vote for me. (its in the only book on the page, you should find my name cossiscute there)
Q: What's the best thing you got for Christmas this year or ever?
A: The best thing I've EVER gotten for Christmas is probably a whole Rockband set for the Wii I would play it with my sisters and we'd have so much fun in the mornings, waking our parents up by being to rowdy with it xD