The next few months felt like a warm breeze, Gülnihal finally tasted justice after months of anxiety and stress.
But she now had another problem, now that hurrem was out of the picture how would that effect her relationship with the sultan? She only went after him because she wanted hurrem to hurt as she had for months. But now the red haired hatun was suffering and would most likely be the one forgotten.
Gülnihal hadn't expected the sultan to react the way he had, she had thought that he would forgive her within a few days but here months had went by and no such thing had happened.
In fact, it was as if the red haired woman never existed, she had learnt by esma that a physician would visit her twice a week. Nigar hatun would spend any free time with her and that she only left her chambers to visit the bathhouse or to visit Mehmed who was still in the royal nursery.
Gülnihal had seen glimpse of her former friend, her belly had grown bigger but she looked as gloomy as the day that Gülnihal had first met her. It almost made her feel guilty, she had wanted to hurt her but now she longed to comfort her former friend. Hug until she felt better. But that chapter was closed now she thought. Revenge and bitterness had destroyed all paths to healing and they would have to live with it.
But at the same time Gülnihal didn't regret her actions. By burning her face, hurrem had become as evil as mahidevran when the Sultana had poisoned and beaten her. The beating could be forgiven if people considered it carefully. Mahidevran sultana was grieving and thought hurrem caused her suffering. The poison even Gülnihal knew was a step too far, but she had been punished and the sultan had said that she understood her mistakes and accepted them. Gülnihal doubted that but didn't say anything on the matter.
She still visited the sultan regularly, excluding the holy Thursday night. Ever since mahidevran sultana had gotten back into favour, he spent the Thursday nights with her and other nights he called for Gülnihal. Gülnihal had sympathised with the sultan a little but didn't immediately fall in love with him, there was still so much she didn't know about this man and sometimes she was confused by his emotions.
Did he read the same poems he read to her to another woman? Had he whispered the same words to another woman? So many questions yet no answers she realised after a night ful of troubled sleep and unanswered questions. Gülnihal hadn't felt like this for ages.
Currently she was sat in the Sultans chambers with him head resting on her naked thigh. She had visited him last night and he had requested for her to stay, it was know mid-afternoon and he had a meeting in a few hours she realised. However he made no movement of leaving nor did he dismiss her.
She ran her fingers through his short hair as she felt him relax even more. She often wondered what was going on in this man's head, was he carrying dark secrets or worse. She felt for him but also thought that he was easily swayed. By anyone who he deemed trustable. Be it Hurrem, Ibrahim, valide, herself or his own thoughts.
engrossed in her own thoughts she only just realised that the sultan had in fact fallen asleep, carefully she removed herself from him and sorted out her clothes and hair. She left after alerting Ibrahim.
" How was it with the sultan" asked Ayse after she returned, Gülnihal smiled softly and began the tale.
" It was the same as always. I spent the night with him and in the morning we ate breakfast together"
Ayse only laughed and told her that she was their longer than usual. True thought Gülnihal, normally she would leave after breakfast but this time she stayed near evening.
" Oh yes, he had wanted my company so I stayed"
The conversation flew in another direction after that, unlike hurrem Ayse knew when to end a topic and start a new one. But then again ayse was the better friend.
Hurrem was a fire that burnt everyone, no matter who they are. She was hot-headed and stubborn. The sultan was attracted to this until it effected his day to day life. Gülnihal felt safe around her until she hurt her.
Ayse was like the ocean, soft and playful but could cause a storm of waves if threatened. Her anger was more controlled but when she did get angry her enemies better run the other direction or face her storm.
Ayse's salty water tamed and healed the scars that were left on her after she had returned from the old palace. She returned fearful but now she felt comfort within this dark haired womans company. Gülnihal learnt that ayse was the friend she truly needed and would kill for if she had to. She owed this woman a lot she had thought a few weeks ago.
Two weeks later, Gülnihal was sat on a pillow near the valide whilst mahidevran sultana was sat opposite her and Gulfem hatun sat next to her. The three woman were working on embroidery while the valide was playing with Mustafa. Little Mehmed had visited a few minutes ago but was taken away to eat. He had looked healthy and adorable. Gülnihal wouldn't deny that the boy had his mother's smile.
" Daye, call hurrem hatun. She shouldn't be locked up in her chambers too much"
Gülnihal had frozen at that, but like a good concubine and favourite she remained sat down pretending to focus on her work and complimenting Gulfem's.
A few minutes later, in came daye hatun with hurrem. Hurrem was wearing a pale blue dress with sapphire jewelry. Her red hair in two elegant braides with a diamond and sapphire headband resting on her head.
She sat in next to the sultana who offered her some food. She declined but accepted some sweet drink.
The valide questioned her on her health and she answered in short answers but kept a pleasant smile on her face.
Gülnihal stole glances her way and saw her doing the same. Their friendship may have been broken but the memories were to hard to let go of.
Putting down her embroidery Gülnihal met the eyes of Mustafa. The child looked bored to tears and Gülnihal wanted an escape from this awkward moment.
" My valide, with your primission I would like to go to the gardens. I feel a little suffocated"
The valide nodded in approval and she got up and as she expected he ran to her begging to join her. She agreed happily and they walked out
They only made it a few steps away before daye hatun called out
" Gülnihal hatun, please escort hurrem hatun. The valide said that she may need some air to aid her"
Reluctantly she smiled and went to retrieve the pregnant women. Linking arms as if they were friends once more they walked towards the garden.
Mustafa ran off, chasing birds and playing. Whilst Gülnihal and hurrem awkwardly walked the small trail and sat down on the chairs provided.
A aga came with some food and drinks, mahidevran sultana must have asked him to she thought as she took some water and drank out of the golden goblet. Hurrem did the same as she stared into the distance.
they sat awkwardly until hurrem spoke, her voice sounded hoarse and now that Gülnihal looked at her properly she saw the red eyes. They were puffy she noticed.
" Are you happy"
Gülnihal blinked, her mouth went dry and her cheeks hot. Was she happy?
" Yes, I have a loving sultan"
Hurrem blinked a few times, in the start of this tale hurrem would have been the one to say this and Gülnihal in the sidelines. Now it was Gülnihal who could say this and hurrem who stood in the sidelines. How fate changes she thought.
" Was it worth it"
Gülnihal had often thought this very question, did hurrem think that burning her was worth any trouble. Gülnihal suspected that hurrem had grown over confident and didn't think she would have to face any punishment for her actions. Mahidevran had and she had nearly all the dynasty's support, hurrem only had the sultan and he was a busy man.
" I thought I would end up like mahidevran, I didn't want to end up like her..."
Gülnihal laughed bitterly, oh what a horrible twist of fate. A burning incident led to this. Gülnihal had a right to revenge, huma hatun had reassured her when she had cold feet during her healing. Both women suffered the same fate yet one thought she was better than the rest.
" Now you have ended up exactly like her, even worse I believe. So tell me hurrem was loosing my loyalty for a man who would leave you worth it"?
Hurrem didn't answer, she just stared anyway but at her. Gülnihal felt as if they had been out long enough. She rose and called for Mustafa.
He came after a few minutes, his cheeks red and hair messy, she frowned. He would need a bath she realised as she tried fixing his hair.
" I have to take the prince inside now. I'll alert Esme to come escort you "
Hurrem didn't respond and Gülnihal didn't wait for a response.