Our Nanny is a Boy || bxb

By XiaoNathan

45.9K 2.1K 693

"The boy looked up and smiled at Peter, and Peter mentally noted that he had the brightest smile in the unive... More

Introduction
Prologue
1. Heavy hearts
2. The right choice
3. Apron
4. Cute
5. Borrow my shoulder
6. Omelette
7. Too fascinated
8. Married at twenty-one
9. Friend
10. Falling leaves
11. Security
12. Dreamscape
13. Please stay
14. No
15. Carpe Diem
16. Oppa
17. Whipped
18. Baby
19. Memories
20. Change the contract
21. Bet
22. Richard
23. Make a wish
24. Family
25. Starlight
26. Homeless
27. Attached
28. What's wrong about love?
29. Never leave me
30. Trigger
31. It hurts
32. What family should do
33. Mom
34. Two different persons
35. Reason
36. Comfort
37. Butter
38. Losing him
39. Light
40. Bloody oath
41. Stars
42. Mrs Wilson
43. Butterfly
44. Motivation
45. Pwesents!
46. Rachel
47. Fortune
48. Sweet dreams
49. Pretty things
50. I'm a cowboy
51. Country boy
52. Brekkie
53. Stay-at-home dad
54. Claim him
55. K-I-S-S-I-N-G
56. No escape
57. Keep you safe
58. Stay
59. Worthless
60. Talk to me
61. Gin and tonic and beer
62. Space
63. I love you
64. You big crybaby
65. Tired
66. A new nanny
67. Screwed over
68. Come back to us
69. He's dead.
70. She'll be apples
71. Don't leave us
72. Forgiveness
73. Third chance
74. Fly
75. Bound to break his heart
76. No going back
77. The beauty within the shards
78. Fight for us
79. Peaches or bananas
80. Saturday dates
81. Two men holding hands
82. A great husband
83. Incredible
84. Weedy seadragon
86. Pathetic
87. Twisting and twisting
88. The brightest smile in the universe
89. 21st century girl
90. Inferno
91. In love
92. No regrets
93. Just kiss me
94. Cats and dogs
95. Up to you
96. Icing

85. Dear Evan Hansen

201 9 9
By XiaoNathan

Robin's POV

They stumbled across a cute café not much later and decided to check it out. After ordering their coffees, they sat down in a corner of the restaurant, close to the fireplace. 'Hm, perfect,' Robin sighed in content, sipping his caramel latte. 'I couldn't have wished for a better date, honestly.'

Peter grinned. 'My pleasure. Do you have anything in mind for our next one?'

'Well, actually I do,' Robin said. 'Because I've heard about this new movie that's hitting theatres next week. And it's starring Lady Gaga!' He gasped.

'Wait, you mean "A Star is Born"?' Peter said. 'I was planning to go there, I just didn't know with who. Well, that settles it.' He clapped his hands.

'Oh my god,' Robin said, feeling excited. 'You like Lady Gaga too?'

'Duh,' Peter said. 'I'm bisexual. I don't even know why that never clicked with me.'

'For real,' Robin said. 'You liked Lady Gaga and sincerely believed you were straight? I'm- I'm sorry, but I can't defend you anymore. You are really dense.'

'Well, no sh*t, Sherlock,' Peter said. 'Still less dense than you, though.'

'Oh, I noticed,' Robin said. 'I just didn't want to, so I acted like I didn't until I actually believed it.'

'Fair enough,' Peter said, sipping his iced coffee. 'I guess that was the case with me too. Acknowledging my feelings meant to me that I had to acknowledge that my feelings for Richard were real, and pretending like they weren't was honestly the only way I could deal with my trauma at first.'

Robin nodded. 'Yeah, I get that. I guess Isaac was also a big part of the reason why I didn't want to acknowledge my feelings for you at first. Because that would mean putting myself in that vulnerable position again, where I could get hurt.'

He noticed Peter, who was grinning widely, and looked at him in confusion. 'Why are you smiling?'

'Do you realize you just confessed to me?' Peter said.

'That wasn't a confession,' Robin said quickly.

'Oh yes, it was,' Peter said. 'You said you acknowledged your feelings for me. So you do have them.'

'Well, wasn't that obvious?' Robin muttered.

'Very,' Peter said. 'It's just the first time you've said it out loud.'

Robin looked away, blushing furiously.

'Thank you.' Peter changed his tone to a softer one. 'For putting yourself in that vulnerable position with me.'

Robin had his left hand resting on the table and Peter reached over to put his hand on top of it. 'I'll take good care of you.'

'I know you will,' Robin said quietly.

_____________________________________

They had to walk all the way back to the car, but it felt different from the way they went before. Robin felt like something within him had changed the moment he fully acknowledged his feelings. He wanted to talk. He felt... ready. Ready to tell Peter about Isaac. So he did.

'I met him while I lived with my uncle,' Robin said. 'Stuff wasn't going well. You see, he tried to take good care of me, but he didn't really have an easy life. He was a gambler, it was compulsive. Whenever he got money, he found ways to lose it again. He tried to stop, but every time the gambling world would drag him back in, via ads, the lights of the casino's. He really wanted to take care of me, but he was just... not ready. Eventually, I had to drop out, as you know. I worked two part-time jobs, one at a fast-food restaurant and one as a babysitter, to provide for us both. But I had to be very careful with my money. He stole my card twice and spent like a 1000 dollars with it. He was really sorry afterwards and in the end he paid back 500, but yeah... it was still tough, living there.'

'No way,' Peter said. 'He took you in, but instead of him taking care of you, you had to take care of him. After losing your mom, you had to drop out of school and work two jobs just to provide for your own uncle, a full grown man? That is so not okay!'

'Well, it's not like I had anywhere else to go,' Robin said. 'I was just grateful someone wanted me and he never did anything to hurt me, at least not on purpose.'

'Still,' Peter said. 'You had your education taken away from you because of him. If you weren't so strong and selfless, you might have ended up like him. That would be justifiable.'

Robin shook his head. 'No, he was a good man, deep down. But I have to admit, it wasn't easy. Living with him. So, I spent most of my time outside of the house. I felt lonely, so after work, I roamed the streets. That's when I came across him. He was outside alone, just like me. Every night, at the bridge. I noticed him, but he didn't notice me. Until one day, I finally mustered up the courage to talk to him.'

He remembered it clearly. Something about the boy had just pulled him in. He was there every night and he looked so lonely, almost as if he was waiting for someone who would never come. Despite his fear of the unknown, Robin had walked towards him that day. He had looked up and taken off his headset. 'Can I help you?'

'It's a beautiful view here,' Robin had said. 'Mind if I join you here?'

He had seemed to hesitate before shrugging. 'Sure.'

He did not put his headphones back on, so Robin decided to strike up some small talk. It was not successful, he seemed pretty bored. 'What were you listening to?' Robin said, gesturing towards his headphones.

The boy took it off and handed it to Robin. 'You listen to it.'

So Robin did. 'Oh my god, is that from "Dear Evan Hansen?"'

'Yup.'

'That is such a good musical!' Robin said excitedly, half taking off the headphones so he could listen to it and hear the boy talk at the same time. 'Do you like musicals?'

'I do. You?'

'I love them!' Robin said. 'Sadly, I've never been able to see one in real life, but you have no idea how many times I've rewatched the DVD of Les Miserables my mom got me for my fourteenth birthday.'

'Your mom supports you?' the boy asked.

'Well, she did,' Robin said. 'But she... passed away.'

'Oh my god, I'm so sorry,' the boy said. 'But at least you have nice memories of her, right?'

Robin nodded, but he didn't want to go to that topic. 'Anyway, I didn't catch your name.'

A mischievous glint appeared in the boy's eyes. 'I didn't throw it.'

Robin gasped. 'Okay, JD!'

'Just kidding.' The boy laughed. 'It's Isaac. What's yours?'

'Robin.'

'Well, Robin, I happen to have a spare ticket for Dear Evan Hansen this weekend. Girlfriend broke up with me a couple days ago, so I didn't know whether I should still go or not. I was hoping she'd call me back, but I don't think that's going to happen anymore, so... well, either you take it, or it's going in the trash. You choose.'

'Are you serious?' Robin asked in disbelief.

'Yeah, why not?' Isaac said. 'It's better than going alone.'

'Then, yes,' Robin said. 'Absolutely!'

________________________________________

So, I had that dinner with my dad and it was pretty nice, but we still didn't have a heart-to-heart. I tried opening up about my struggles with autism which have been getting worse, but he looked at me as if I was speaking in alien language. Bro, that dude once went to a psychiatrist and she told him "you are not autistic, you have too much empathy". BITCH WHERE? I certainly can't find it.

Oh right, and when we were going to order, he let me order first cuz "ladies first". Off to a great start. But overlooking that, it was okay. I did feel sad when he left. I spent 3 hours cleaning my apartment, only for him to comment that it was really too small for all of my stuff and laugh about the bathroom I forgot to clean. I mean it was lowkey funny because all the clothes I've worn in the last 5 days were crammed into those 2 cubic metres. But still. He criticizes me so much, as if he ever does any cleaning around the house. 

My dad once told me he had never seen a successful transgender, and that made me determined to prove to him that I could do exactly that. I am already way farther in life than he has ever been, but he only sees what he wants to see. Yet I still keep trying. I try to be perfect in every way, but my mental health is rapidly declining and now that is all he sees: an unstable wreck. And of course he blames that on the fact that I'm trans, and not on the continuous pressure his disappointment in me has burdened me with.

Oh well. Dads, am I right?

Also, not me acting like I know musicals, the only ones I've seen are Annie, The Greatest Showman and Heathers (obsessed with that one). I do know this song tho.

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