"Who are you damn it, and whh do I like you?"
My heartbeat increased out of happines. I'm your wife, I'm Jasmine your Jasmine.
I slept so peacefully that night. In the past few months that I was apart from Zayn I had a nightmare every night. However this night was different. His scent, his body, this whole man here, I'm close to him again.
The separation wasn't easy but I won't give up on you now, I'll take you with me to our children, even if that means that I have to give my own life, I will. I'll do anything to get you out of here.
~~~ Next morning ~~~
As soon as the sun touched my skin it made me awake. When I opened my eyes I saw Zayn still laying next to me, his arms wrapped around me.
I wish we could stay like this forever, but I had business to take care of today. Those pills, I'll make sure I get to know what they are for. As I touched my pocket, I had them still in it. Glad these pockets are tight.
"Zay- Mr. Ramirez, wake up Mr. Ramirez," I tried as I touched his arms to wake him up.
"Just a few more minutes," he mumbled as his grip on my waist got tighter, pressing me more against him. It gave me butterflies but at the same time pain. I had craved this so much, to be this close to him.
"Mr. Ramirez it's me Jasmine, can you please let go of me?"
"Jasm..," he opened one eye realising what he was doing.
"I'm sorry," he said letting go of me. I got up, bowing my head a bit, he was still laying on the bed, a total snack if you ask me. One of his hands behind his head so he could support his head while he looked at me. His hair slightly over his eyes, calm down Jasmine before you jump right on top of him.
"Thank you for your kindness Mr. Ramirez," I said not looking at him, behaving as if I was shy even though I cringed. "I'll make my leave."
"To?" He asked. - "The stable."
"You won't sleep there from now on. You'll sleep in the room next to my room."
My eyes widened. "But," - "No buts." His face strict. I like it.
"Thank you." He nodded.
I wanted to dance from happines but I didn't of course. Just as I wanted to leave the room Zayn spoke. "Jasmine," - "Yes?"
"We'll go to the pharmacy in 15 minutes, prepare yourself." I nodded, leaving the room closing the door behind me.
I walked into the room next to his room and this one was ugly as well. It was a big room but it was designed by Evelina, not my taste at all.
I had no other clothes so I tried to look at my best in the clothes that I was wearing. After washing my face in the bathroom, I brushed my hair and that's it. There was nothing more in this room I could use. No toothbrush or moisturizer.
The 15 minutes went by and I sat on the bed. "Jasmine," Zayn knocked on the door.
"Yes, come in," I replied as I stood up.
"Ready?" I nodded to which he signed me to come with him.
He was in a suit, the suits he had at home were way better than this one. Even then, he looked handsome. This man could wear a trashbag and he would look good.
I couldn't resist myself from looking at his mascular back. The way he marched away was as if he could kill anyone who appeared in front of him.
"Where's she going?" I heard the maids whispering. "She spend the night with Mr. Ramirez," I heard another one whispering. Yes I spend the night with my husband.
I rolled with my eyes as I walked quicker because Zayn was almost outside of the mansion.
One of his men opened the door for him and he got in the driversseat. Where should I sit? I decided to just stand until he told me to sit even though this felt really awkward.
"Jasmine, are you getting in or?" He asked as he lowered the window of the passengers seat. I nodded opening the door myself, and getting in.
He drove away, out of the mansion, the mansion I wish we could leave together for good. I wish he would tell me now that Jasmine I remember you, this was all a lie and we're going home to Valentino en Valeria.
"Put your belt on." His voice made me alert again. The pills Jasmine, the pills are for now important.
"Yes," I replied as I put the belt on.
"I'll tell the maids to drop some clothes at your room," he began, still looking at the road. I murmered a thank you.
I couldn't deny that I was admiring his side profile. His sharp jawline and his hooded eyes, looking intimidating.
"Enjoying the view Jasmine?"
"Yes the view on your side of the road is beautiful." The small smile on his lips didn't go unnoticed.
"There's only a wall on my side of the road," he bounched back daringly. I gulped, couldn't I think of a better excuse.
"Well, I can see, my side of the view in the reflection of the window next to yours," I tried as I played with my fingers.
"Ohh, and why don't you look out of the window next to yours then?" His tone teasingly.
"Uhm my neck hurts, that's why I look in your direction." He laughed at my respond as he shook his head.
"Tell me more about yourself Jasmine."
"Like?"
"What do you like, what did you major in, etc."
"I like Zayn Matteo, my husband. He passed away seven months ago in a bom blast. The only thing I had from him to burry was a black piece of cloth that he was wearing." I gulped to get myself together before I would burst out into tears. "I'm sorry for your loss," he said.
"It's okay. What did I major in, I majored in nothing. I didn't finish school. How about you? What do you like and what did you major in?"
He went quiet for a moment. "I like the nature, it makes me feel relaxed. What did I major in," he went quiet as if he was trying to look into his memory but it didn't come to him easily.
"You majored in business and in being a mafia," I said almost whispering.
He gave me a quick look his eyes forming almost thin lines.
"It was a guess," I tried to defend myself.
He went quiet not replying anymore. The rest of the ride to the pharmacy was quiet. He didn't say a word nor did he look in my direction.
Once we arrived he told me I could go in.
I didn't know how quick I could get out of the car because the nerves were eating me from the inside.
Fortunately there weren't many people in the pharmacy. "Miss can I help you?" A young man asked. "Yes, can you help me with this." I took the pills out of my pocket.
"Can you please tell me what these are for?" He took the pills from me examining them.
"I'll take them with me, do you have a few minutes so I can look them with the pharmacist?" I nodded. I hope he'll be quick so Zayn doesn't come inside. From what I can remember he has zero patience.
Ten minutes passed and the young man came outside with the pharmacist. "Hello miss, may I ask you where you got these from?" His face serious as if I had commited a crime.
"I can't tell you that, can you please tell me what these medicines are for?" He was not amused by my answer.
"These are medicines that make you forget things. And you miss have the most strongest version of them. You gave us the medicines and they have all kind of shapes but it's one medicine. These are very damaging and should not be used without the approval of a doctor."
The blood drained out of my face. They made him forget things, they did this to my husband. The anger boiling my blood, making me clench my fists.
"Can you do me one favor, can you please give me placebo medicines, please as much as you can?"
"For?" - "I need them please."
He hesitated for a moment. "I'll be back in a few minutes."
Suddenly someone placed his hand on my shoulder. I was shivering, it must be Zayn, did he hear everything?
"Jasmine." That voice, that's not Zayn. I turned around as fast as I could.
"James!" There was anger in his eyes but also relief.
I hugged him tightly and so did he.
"Where did you go to," he sounded angry and worried at the same time.
"Where the actual f*ck did you dissappear that day? You left me alone with Valentino and Valeria. Do you even know how much those two have been crying? Valentino won't stop asking for you."
Hearing him say this made me cry instantly. "I'm sorry James I'm really sorry."
He wiped my tears away. "Shhh stop crying."
"Excuse me, here are the pills." James looked questionly at the pharmacist.
"James can you pay for them please?" He nodded not knowing what was happening.
I had a whole bag full with pills. "Tell me, what are those for Jasmine?"
I looked outside, Zayn was still waiting.
"James I have to be quick. That day when I dissappeared I saw a man looking exactly like Zayn, I followed him and he captured me."
James face was all alert now.
"I saw his body, his marks and it turned out to be Zayn." - "What?!" He shouted.
"Let me finish I have no time james! He is married to someone called Evelina Ramirez. However that's not the point. They gave him pills to make him forget things, those pills are the strongest among them and that's why I got these placebo pills. He can't remember any of us."
He grabbed his hair in frustration. "Zayn is still alive?" He asked again. "Yes."
"Are you 100% sure it's Zayn?" - "Yes."
"Then I'll take him with me, even if I have to use force." He walked away to the door. "Stop James! He has a gun as well, the family he's part of now is a mafia as well."
"I don't care I'm a mafia as well and I know Zayn's weak points."
"He can harm you James!" - "Let him harm me, where is he?"
I pointed at the car, and I saw James eyes widening when he saw Zayn inside the car.
"Zayn man damn it." He said the pain visible in his voice. James took his phone out. "Everyone ready? Yes the car in front of me. As soon as I attack you'll protect Jasmine at all cost."
"James don't do it please!" I tried my best.
James knocked on the window, making Zayn turn the windown down.
I saw the fists that James formed. He tried to control himself, he was sad, he was in pain. Zayn was like his brother after all.
"Get out." James said bluntly as a respond Zayn took his gun out pointing it right at James.
"Get the f*ck out of my sight." Zayn stated as he reloaded his gun.
"Get out or I'll blow your car up asshole."
Shit someone will shoot now.
Zayn got out of the car looking like he could blow this whole area up in moments. "Who the f*ck are you calling an asshole, you son of a b*tch." He grabbed James by his colar.
James didn't reply, instead he smiled. "Why are you smiling you d*ckhead?" Zayn almost growled.
"Zayn, you asshole," James laughed as he tried to hug him. Zayns eyes catched mine as soon as he heard the name 'Zayn'.
"This is all your plan isn't it Jasmine?" Zayn spoke as he gritted his teeth looking at me with so much hate, that if eyes could kill I would have been dead multiple times by now.
I shook my head, gulping. "This was not my plan I swear."
He shook his head in disbelief afterwhich he made a movement that threw James from him, his body collapsing on the ground.
"James!" I screamed in agony running towards him.
"Ahh! Darn you Zayn where did you learn that?" James said, but he was clearly in pain.
"Shut up," Zayn replied, pointing his gun on James head.
"Don't!" I shouted, protecting James with my body.
"Shoot him and I'll kill you with bare hands Delmar." Now it was my turn to get angry.
"Ooh lovers I guess," Zayn scoffed. "How about I finish you both?"
"Try to harm my sister and I'll shoot the shit out of you, just like you would have done Zayn," James replied.
"Why would I protect this woman," Zayn bounched back.
"Because she is your wife asshole."
James was trying to get up, but Zayn fired next to him, to which he stayed on the ground.
"Should I prove to you that she is not my wife?" Zayn spoke. I looked questionly at Zayn.
"I know you betrayed her with the daughter of Cassilo Ramirez the mafia man whom you hated the most Zayn, how could you? I thought you died that day when we attacked Cassilo, but here you are all well. If you weren't interested in my sister and her children and not to forget your grandmother, you could have walked away."
James got up, the anger all around him.
"There was no need to put this show on, where you somehow dissappeared and not even a limb of you was found. It is clear, you didn't like your wife, I'll take my sister with me, but before that I'd like to show you something."
Zayn's face was dead serious, still pointing the gun at James.
"Drop your damn gun," Zayn spoke to which James glared at him, but even then he gave in.
James took his phone out, showing him something.
"You see these two? These are your children, Valentino and Valeria. Valentino is almost two years old and Valeria just turned eight months. And see this, here are you holding the both of them."
The emotions on Zayns face were not detectable at all, he was still serious as he examined the pictures.
"This is your grandmother who raised you like her own child. Your parents passed away but she was always by your side. And this, look at her, this is the woman you speak about this disrespectfully, see how you are holding her in this picture. Here she announced that she was pregnant with Valeria during your birthday party."
James took a break to place his arm around me, as if he was scared that Zayn would hurt me.
"You Zayn mother f*cker brought this woman here into your mansion because you made a promise with her dad. You took her in and you tortured her, you were not nice to her but somehow you fell in love with her kindness because she was always fighting for you just like she is now."
"Shut up!" Zayn growled as he pointed his gun on James. His face became red, red from rage, the veins in his neck popping up.
"Zayn," I whispered to which he pointed his gun at me.
"I should have killed you the day you appeared in front of me with the taxi," he gritted his teeth.
"Shut up Zayn," James said angrily. "She is my sister and I'll take her with me, I'll give her the life you couldn't and I'll wipe you out from her memory. You can go and f*ck your whore Evelina Ramirez."
"Say that one more time and I'll riddle your body with bullets." Zayn glared at James, he could fire at any moment. How did I even end up in this situation?
I am so stupid, I should have known that James would look for me.
"Why?" I began.
"Why did you let me sleep in your bed with you when you have a wife? Is that acceptable? I don't think so. Why were you holding me so close to you in the morning? And why was I right with every mark on your body? Do you really think everyone knows your body? Not even James knows about your birthmarks, only I know!"
"Jasmine!" Zayn shouted.
"What are you waiting for Zayn shoot me already, riddle my body with bullets, but know this, your son will take revenge on you if you kill me. Yes, Valentino will kill you, your son whom you loved the most."
Zayn lowered his gun as if he was trying to remember the past.
"Zayn Evelina has been giving you medicines through which you forget everything! That's why I went to the pharmacy today, not for my legs but to know what those pills were for in your drawer. Those pills make you forget the past."
"Shut up," Zayn said glaring at me. "What more fake shit do you wanna tell me?"
"You don't believe me right?" I asked my voice shaking, my heart was in pain again because it recalled all the memories we had together.
I nodded my head. "Good," I managed to mumble, and then in a reflex I took James gun from the ground. Zayn had trained me in the past so I knew how to use a gun. I reloaded in two seconds, making James and Zayn look at me alertly.
"I love you Zayn, but it hurts me to see you in this state. You don't believe any of what I tell you. I hope you will live well after this, I hope Evelina can love you more than I did."
My throat got sore and my heart pounded faster, but my soul wanted peace, it wanted rest. My children came into my mind, the both of them laughing and giggling. I closed my eyes having them in my mind, I wanted to end it with them.
And then I fired, the pain going through my body, every inch of my body was in pain. Was it the pain of the bullet or the pain of life? I didn't know, but I wanted my body to tune out. It endured too much, it wasn't able to handle more.
Dad I hope I'll open my eyes and see you. Let me be the girl I always wanted to be, the girl who could walk freely. I'm sorry Valentino and Valeria, I love you two.
James shouted my name, almost screaming. Never have I heard his voice like this before, it gave me chills.
"Open your eyes Jasmine!" He shouted, cupping my cheeks.
"You asshole you stole my sister from me! You asshole!!" His sorrow filled the streets.
Zayn, our love has a bad ending I guess, I hope you'll find peace in life. I tried to open my eyes, but my eyelids were too weak.
"Get off her," it was Zayn, I saw him vaguely. "Don't touch her with your damn cursed hands!" James shouted at him hugging me tightly.
"F*cking idiot get off her!" His voice stern and commanding this time.
"J-James, my b-body is h-hurting?" I managed to utter.
"I got you Jasmine, we will go to the hospital, stay awake okay?" James, tried to calm me as he caressed my hair.
But then I felt someone pulling me away from James, I smelled his odor, the odor I wish I could smell forever.
He walked me in his arms as a tear touched my face, it wasn't my tear. I opened my eyes with all the power that I had in my body, it was Zayns tear, he was crying.
"Why a-are y-ou crying?" I whispered.
"Shh, don't talk. Your pain will increase, stay quiet."
Why was he crying? He should be happy, I will be gone within minutes.
"Don't c-cry. Y-ou'll be h-appy with E-Evelina."
"F*ck Evelina, don't talk Jasmine."
That one made me smile slightly before passing out.
~~~ Few hours later ~~~
I opened my eyes expecting to be in heaven unfortunatly it turned out to be the hospital bed.
"You're awake," that was Zayn. His eyes were red. Did he keep crying? I reached out to him with my hand and he placed his hand in mine.
"I- water," I managed to utter.
He helped me up placing the pillow behind my back, holding the glass of water below my lips.
I opened my mouth, the water entering my sore throat. At this point I have so many questions. How did I end up being alive?
"Where's James?" I asked. "He's waiting outside."
"Why did you cry?" I asked. He went quiet. There was silence for a long time in which I was able to observe him. His eyes looked dull in front of them, they had no sparkle, the sparkle I had worked so hard for. It was all gone. He was deeply in thoughts and I knew he was trying to remember me.
"Zayn," he looked at me.
"Jasmine," he began. "I have to go."
"Will you leave me alone?" I asked, somehow prepared for this.
"I don't know. You might meet me again or you might not. I will go back to the mansion and I'll find out who speaks the truth. If you and James are correct then I'll be back by your side within one month. If not, then don't look for me because you won't find me ever again."
He walked away to the door.
"It was nice meeting you Jasmine and I hope someday your pain will soothen"
"I'll wait for you," I whispered. To which he gave me a small smile before he walked away, closing the door behind him.
I pressed my eyes closed, trying to remain calm. This was what I was afraid of, I lost him, again.
But this time I won't look for him, never. He'll come back to me, if he doesn't come back within one month then I'll try to erase him from my memory. Even if it will take my whole life.
"He's gone," James said to which I opened my eyes. I nodded.
"You played it well Jasmine," James grinned as he walked over to me.
"Played?" I asked confused. "What do you mean James?"
"The bullet scratched your skin only, it's a minor wound that will heal quickly."
"Really?" I was perplexed.
"Yes, but it wasn't a smart move of you," his tone was angry now.
"Why?"
"What do you mean why? Are you even a mother Jasmine? How could you even think about this let alone doing it? You have two damn children who are crying for you. What would I tell them, your mother died just like your father? Come on damn it, don't be this shelfish."
He took a break to catch his breath.
"Why did you do this?" He asked me. I shrugged my shoulders. "I had so much pain in my chest James, so much that every cell in my body was hurting. I wanted it to stop, I am not able to move on like this, I am a mess James I don't know what to do," I burst out into tears, the tears I tried to keep for myself.
"Shh, Jasmine it's all going to work out in your favor, he'll come back." James hugged me from the side, placing a kiss on my hair.
"But," he began, as he wiped my tears away. "Even if he does not come back you won't ever try something stupid like this again, never." His eyes were serious now, telling me to not mess with myself again.
I nodded. "You are not the first woman who has become a widow Jasmine. Woman like you end up on the streets because they have nothing but they still manage to bring food to the table for their children. And look at you, don't do this ever again." His words did hurt me, but I understood his point completely.
"Can we go home James?"
"We will go home, Valentino and Valeria will go crazy for you," he smiled.
"But Jasmine, did he tell you anything?"
"He said that he'll go back to the mansion to find out who speaks the truth. If you and I speak the truth he'll be back by my side within one month, if not.." I sighed. "If not then I'll never see him in my entire life."
"Stop drama queen, he'll come back in less than two weeks. I know Zayn, he might have trouble remembering all of us, but believe me his mafia instinct is still working," he laughed caressing his back.
"He slammed me with so much force on the ground that my back is still hurting. That man will never accept his defeat, he'll be back but..." he went quiet.
"But what?" I asked.
"I'm not sure if he'll leave anyone alive there." I gulped.
"What do you mean, the maids there haven't done anything."
"No not them, Cassilo Ramirez, he'll definitely receive a few bullets. And Evelina.."
"What about her? Why do you not keep talking James?!"
"He might not kill her but you might," his eyes rested on me.
"Don't talk nonsense James, I will not kill her." He laughed as he shook his head.
"Come let's go home."
~~~ A few hours later ~~~
We arrived at the mansion and let me tell, I missed it so much. This was my home after all, the home I spend so many bad and good days.
The car stopped at the driveway, James got out helping me outside.
"Be prepared Jasmine, Valentino en Valeria will go crazy, but there's another person who will go crazy. Grandma."
"Shit, she'll be angry won't she?" I said being a bit nervous now.
"Good luck, I don't know, she's Zayn grandma after all," he said, chuckling.
James, gave me a hand and we walked both into the mansion, I had missed this so much even though it has been a few days, but still.
"Valentino, Valeria, mommy is home!" I spoke loudly and then all of sudden Valentino came running towards me from the stairs.
"Mommy! Mommy!" The little one cried, his cheeks all red. "Mommy, I miss you Mommy!" I kneeled down opening my arms for hom and he ran into my arms, hugging me tightly as if I'd go again.
"Mommy," he cried. How selfish was I, how selfish, my heart ached seeing my little one in this condition. I wasn't able to stop my tears, seeing my son in this condition shattered me into pieces.
"Shh bambino I'm here, I won't go anywhere, your mommy is here." I caressed his back hugging him tightly.
After some time he pulled back, his face all teary and his lips still trembling. His beautiful grey eyes were shining, the eyes of his father. I wiped his tears away and he tried to smile again.
"My baby, how are you feeling now?" I asked him to which his smile grew wider even though he had still tears in his eyes.
"Mommy loves you Valentino," I said caressing his chubby cheeks.
"I love you too mommy," he said, placing a kiss on my cheek.
"Aah, Valentino where's my kiss?" James spoke as he bended down next to me.
Valentino giggled, placing a kiss on James cheek to which James laughed, picking him up from the floor.
"Where's your sister Valentino," I asked him.
"Granny room." I nodded, walking towards grannies room, I have to admit, I was somewhat scared.
"James I'm kinda afraid," I whispered to which James knocked on the door opening it.
"Jasmine!" Granny shouted as she placed her hand on her mouth in shock. Valeria was on sitting on grannies bed but as soon as she saw me, she whined reaching out with her arms to me.
My heart, I'll get a heartattack today. I didn't know how quick I had to walk to take Valeria into my arms. My arm was still hurting but my baby was here in front of me.
I placed kisses on her face and she went with her mouth over my face as if she tried to kiss me. She was still whining, almost crying.
"Mommy missed you my love, mommy loves you." She made noises as if she was angry with me.
"I'm so sorry my baby, I'm so sorry."
"Jasmine," granny caressed my shoulder.
"Granny, I'm so sorry," I whispered.
She hugged me and so did I.
"My child you have a lot to explain."
"A lot," I mamaged to say.
~~~ Two weeks later ~~~
In the weeks after this I was a fulltime mom to my chidlren. I not want them to cry or to be sad ever again. Therefore I tried my best to be the best mother for them.
Granny fainted when I told her about Zayn, she was a crying mess afterwards for days. Even her bloodpressure went down, and I was afraid I'd lose her.
Fortunately James has been the supportive rock in our live that we needed the most.
"Mommy," Valentino began as he was sitting on the chair in the kitchen. "Yes baby?"
"Can I get strawberry?"
"Of course you can!" I placed a kiss on his cheek, getting up to wash some strawberries for him.
Valeria was on James lap and he was sitting there quietly admiring Valeria and Valentino.
"James, can I make you anything?"
"No thank you Jasmine," he smiled at me.
"I hope Leena wants to make kids directly after marriage because I think I'll go crazy if she doesn't," he laughed at his own sentence.
"Look at you," I laughed. "You men are all the same, we women are no factories okay. We can't pop out children on command."
"I know, but just one child would make me already happy. I mean I want more children but if I get one I'll be the happiest man on earth. Like I'm already blessed to have these two but I want to know how it feels to be a father."
I nodded my head, smiling at his innocence. "I hope you'll have many children James, and let me tell you, you'll be an amazing father!"
He laughed, caressing Valeria's cheeks.
After Valentino had eaten his strawberries we decided to go to the garden. Taking the kids for a walk around the mansion.
I held Valentino's hand walking to the door, while James was getting Valeria into her little coat.
When I opened the door I fell almost to my knees screaming loud. The sound of the voice gave me chills, but the blood that kept dropping on the doorway made me weak.
"Did you miss me?"
~~~~~~~~~~
Hey everyone!
Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Let me know how it was (:
I'll update again after this chapter reaches 60+ votes.
Until then take care!
Xx-Bella
Ps: grammer mistakes will be corrected later on.