(Angst and toxic/ abusive relationship. Not a cute kunizai oneshot)
Kunikidas pov
Dazai osamu is a very strange man. I've been working with him for about a year now but he is still a complete mystery to me.
He always seems so happy and energetic yet some times when he turns away from everyone I will see the smile drop and his eyes go dark. I always think I'm just imagining it because it's simply second that it happens in and no longer but I believe it might be true.
Is his happiness a lie to us.
During his entrance exam I had to complete a case with him where two people died but he didn't bat an eye about it. He even had the nerve to tell me to calm down. The way he spoke to me was so cold and his eyes looked dead. He looked like a whole different person.
I wonder if these personality switches are all symptoms of being suicidal but I've never seen someone like this in real life.
I have never met anyone like dazai osamu before.
I rested my head in my hands and groaned as the pain of the headache I was developing overtook me. Damn it dazai even when your not speaking you still give me headaches.
Speaking of him not speaking.
I looked up from my desk seeing him sitting on the couch staring out the window. I couldn't see his face but even so I was going to demand he get back to work.
I got up and grabbed his shoulder but he just simply turned to me with a small smile. "Yes kunikida"?
"Go back to work".
"Ok".
I watch him approach his desk and sit down grabbing some papers. Weather he actually will work on them or make origami out of them is still a mystery.
"Shouldn't you go back to work and stop staring at me"? I heard him smugly say and my face turned red at the realization that he caught me staring.
"Shut up".
That was a regular thing for us. Me telling him to work and him working or not is the result but more times he will chose to not work then he will to. Yet the unusual thing is when he gets angry.
One day it was raining and like usual he was looking out the window at the rain yet when I approached him and grabbed his shoulder he slapped my hand off.
"Don't touch me".
I got angry and grabbed his wrist that was still on the air and glared. "Don't hit me. There are better ways to tell someone you don't want to be touched without being rude"! I yelled but dazai turned to me with a glare and grabbed my wrist that was on mine.
Dazai has never been strong or muscular but he is cleaver and has a strange amount of knowledge about the human body including pressure points.
He pressed his two fingers into my wrist making my hand let go hid his wrist but he kept a harsh grip on my wrist.
"When I say don't touch me". His grip got tighter to the point it started to hurt.
"That means".
"Dazai stop". I tried prying his fingers off to stop the shooting pain that was entering my wrist due to his tight grip.
"Don't. Touch . Me"!
Snap
I gasped in pain and he lets go of my wrist. I drop to the ground holding my quickly swelling wrist. I could feel my pulse and my wrist seemed to burn and ace at the same time making me cry out in pain.
Yasano ran over to me and I saw dazai stand up and leave the room without looking back.
"Shit it's broken". Yasano whispered then took me to the hospital to heal it.
That was the first time I got a true taste of his cruelty.
A year past and the incident seemed to have been forgotten. He hadn't done anything like that since making me question if it was all a dream or not.
That is until we were sent assigned to get information from a enemy.
We had the enemy yasanos office and she said we could use what we want but I doubted it would come to that.
"I won't speak"! The man yelled looking away from dazai and I.
"Please sir if you tell us we could help you". I tried to reason.
"Help me how exactly"?
"What would you like"?
"Sanctuary ". He smirked and dazai smirked back then stood up grabbing one of yasanos empty syringes .
"Or we could promise not to hurt you and just send you to prison after you tell the information. Yet if you don't want to do things the easy way I guess I have no choice".
"Ha is this the good cop bad cop routine because is so it won't work on-"!
I heard him scream as the syringe was shoved deep into his neck in a stabbing type of way that no doubt hurt like hell.
"Dazai"!
"Tell us what we want to know". He spoke in the cold tone I had only heard once before.
"I won't"!
"Ok I think another one is needed then and how do you feel about donating blood. I think it would make yasano reeeealy happy to have a new thing to play with".
Dazai left the syringe buried in his neck as he grabbed another. I got up but saw my shoe lace was tied to the leg of the chair. When did he have time to do that?
"Dazai stop".
Another scream.
Then another.
I worked quickly to untie my lace but when it finally came undone I heard the man sobbing saying he would tell the information.
"Good do spill". Dazai smirked. After the man finished dazai pulled the syringes out and left leaving me to deal with the man. After the cops came to deal with him I ran to dazais apartment where he went and banged on the door.
"Open up"! I screamed and the door did as told.
"What's up"? He had his usual cheerful voice despite what he had done making me sick.
"What the hell was that back there"!?
"Interrogation"?
"That's not how you interrogate someone"!
Dazai started to tear up which I thought was his actual response to me being extremely angry at him.
"I'm sorry. I just never did this kind of thing before. I just wanted to help". He whimpered and I panicked shaking my hands infront of my face.
"I understand but please never do that again. What you did was wrong".
I heard a sob but didn't get a chance to see his face before he dove into my arms hugging me so I couldn't see his face.
"I'm sorry. I just wanted to be useful to you".
I patted his back still feeling awkward about the situation but soon melted into it believing Dazai actually felt bad.
"You are useful. Your a great worker you just need a bit more learning is all".
Dazai looked up at me with teary eyes. "Kunikida means it"?
I nodded and dazai smiled then suprised me with a gentle kiss.
That day we started dating.
The few years we dated I learned that those moods happened a lot more then I thought. It would happen at least once a month that something would happen that dazai didn't like and either I myself or someone else would get hurt because of it.
I knew he was toxic. I knew this relationship was toxic. But I couldent let him go.
From his teary eyes every time I would bring up a breakup to our late night cuddle sessions I was trapped by him. I was trapped with no escape.
People would assume due to me being strong and independent that I would never get caught in this situation and I'd I did I would easily be able to get out. The only reason I can't is because dazai is dazai a smart manipulating attractive bastered who chooses what he wants then gets it any way he can. And once he gets what he wants he does everything he can to not lose it.
He wanted me. So he got me. Now he has me on a short leash and I have no escape.
I came home from work exhausted and my day only got worse when I smelt the sent of alcohol staining the air.
Dazai was drinking.
I found him in the kitchen glaring at me.
"Where were you"? He snapped.
"Work".
"This late"?
"Yea".
He came over to me inspection me head to toe to see if I was out with someone else and once he finished he started his clingy act hanging onto my arm.
"Kunikidaaa I'm sleepyyyy"~
"Then go to bed".
"Come with me"?
I went with him to the bedroom tucking him into bed then sitting beside the bed stroking his hair as he smiled at me.
"I love you". He muttered and I nodded not speaking.
I felt his hands grab my face harshly dragging me closer to him. "Say it back".
"I love you too".
He smiled then pressed a kiss on my lips and removing his hand from my face.
"Good boy. Please never leave me"?
He truly has me trapped with no way out of his toxic ways. I t hurt to see happy couples with each other or hearing about cute dates people would go on knowing dazai and I would never have that relationship. Yet I can't leave. And I doubt even if I could I wouldn't.
"Don't worry I won't leave you".
"Good boy".