A/N: Who's here?👀
I'm sorry for the heart attack!😭
🚨Trigger warning for pregnancy complications, depression, etc!🚨
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Destiny Jones stepped into the neonatal intensive care unit with a soft sigh when she noticed Santana hovering around the incubators with Baby Jones written on their tags next to their assigned letters.
"Santana, they're not going anywhere." Destiny gently rested a hand on the Latina's shoulder, squeezing softly. "If you want, go take a walk, eat, or take a bathroom break."
"No, no. I'm okay." Santana shook her head, eyes bouncing anxiously between the six children in front of her. She turned to Destiny and wrapped her arms around herself. "How is Piper?"
"Piper's still in surgery. Quinn's waiting with Mercedes and Camren right outside the door in the parent area to walk with her back here." Destiny rubbed her arm comfortingly.
"Is Brittany making progress with Pierce?" Santana asked, biting her lip when Destiny hesitated.
"Ella's trying to help Grace." She responded.
Destiny tried not to think about her daughter's adverse reaction to her children after waking up from her emergency c-section. She knew there would be issues with such a traumatic birth and postpartum being an minor issue with the triplets, but she never imagined having to help Grace through the aftermath of an all natural, unplanned birth with three inexperienced boys on the side of the road.
Grace had lost a good amount of blood, delivering Finnegan and Ángel, sending her straight into complete maternal exhaustion before reaching the hospital. The doctors had rushed her straight into surgery before any of them were able to arrive to support her through the surgery.
And that was nothing compared to Grace's panic when the doctors finally figured out why Pierce looked like a girl and boy.
They missed two in the ultrasound due to how small Grace was. Her constant rib and back pain coming from the physical bending and manipulating of insides for twenty-six entire weeks to bring eight children into the world. Unfortunately, all eight needed to be rushed away before Grace could hold them when they were in the doctor's hands to seek interventional assistance.
"So, names? Quinn hasn't told me besides...Fitz?" Destiny took a few steps toward the first set of twins, smiling down at their tiny squirmy bodies.
"Better than Finn. His name is Finnegan Hades Micheal Jones." Santana placed her gloved hand on Baby A's clear incubator with an adoring stare down at the wire-covered baby inside. She turned and did the same to his twin, smiling softly. "This one is Ángel Quentin Miguel. Quinn keeps calling him Little Q."
"Little Finn, Little Q, who's next?" Destiny laughed. She picked up the charts and scribbled the baby's first names for her fellow doctors and nurses, knowing the A, B, and Cs would confuse their family after a while. "They look like you."
"Really?"
"Oh, absolutely. Might be hard to tell right now, but the nose and the face shape looks a lot like you."
Santana smiled, looking between the babies. She could see the dark fuzz on their heads faintly under their color-coded hats, tiny brown eyes squinting up at her before closing again. She turned and slipped away from the two pinkish-caramel skin toned children to the more olive toned babies. She smiled down at the next set of twins, chuckling at their cute little hairless rat look.
They were smaller than Finnegan and Ángel, though not by much. Their eyes were most definitely Grace's emerald green from what she's seen. Other than that, she couldn't say anything about their features. Santana was a little thrown off by the odd chance Quinn's original nose was on the twins between the two pairs that looked more Lopez. She wasn't sure who the kids were related to since the mix was...surprising, but she didn't care.
As long as they were alive, Santana was in love with every one of them.
"Baby C is Wesley Roseana." Santana blushed a bit at the name, thanking Brittany for the adorable combination of her and Grace for the middle. She smiled down at the other boy, chuckling. "And this one is Wiley Maxwell."
"Wesley and Wiley." Destiny chuckled, scribbling down the names with a smile. "How cute."
"Grace almost stabbed Quinn and I for not going with Whisper and Warren...you know, before," Santana confessed, shrugging. "But we all loved Wesley and Wiley."
Destiny nodded, chuckling at the short tale. She believed her daughter would have reacted that way completely. She picked up the clipboards to the empty spaces where the missing babies were, looking at Santana.
"Then, Little Brittany. We have Pierceson..."
"Wyatt. Pierceson Wyatt." Santana finished, grinning a bit as she pointed to the next child. "Then Piper Maribella. After Ella and my Mom."
"I knew Grace shouldn't have watched Twilight." Destiny snorted at the name combination, scribbling it down. "But I think Maribella is beautiful. Piper and Pierce are quite the combo already."
"Do you..." Santana anxiously looked where the twin's incubators should have been. "Do you know if Piper will be okay? If she'll make it?"
Destiny filled out the chart a little slower as she thought through what Doctor Hailstone had told her from the cardio department.
Piper was born with underdeveloped heart chambers, preventing blood flow from circulating as strongly as her siblings. This brought Grace's stress levels through the roof when they rushed Piper into surgery unexpectedly, followed by their youngest and tiniest child -- a neurological case.
"The doctors in there are my friends, and I know they'll do everything they can for her," Destiny reassured the teenager. "She's strong. Their main concern is Baby H."
Santana nodded, looking down at the next baby with a small frown. She tilted her head at the child's reddish-tinted hair and looked up at Destiny with a hopeful look.
"Will the red change?" Santana asked, almost embarrassed to be asking such a question.
"Will and Ella both have red in their family. Mixed, but it's there." Destiny laughed when Santana groaned and rolled her eyes. "And I talked to your Mom, and she said you have it mixed with some distant family. It's very dominant in Quinn's family. Any of you could have triggered the recessive gene. Either way, she's beautiful, Santana. I know you hate Raegan, but she's not related to her. Believe it or not, that face is all Grace despite the hair."
"She has brown eyes," Santana observed, looking down at the child in thought. "Grace and Brittany picked the name as a backup, so it was only fitting since Grace didn't want to see her yet. She'll get the final say when she fills out the paperwork, obviously."
"What did you guys pick?"
"Georgianna Jean." Santana rolled her eyes at the combination. "007 or something. Brittany said it's one of Grace's favorite characters in that doctor's show. Two Ns after Grace's Ns. Jean for Jean Sylvester."
"Little Grace." The black woman hummed.
Destiny couldn't help but grin at the name, nodding as she wrote down the dedication. She moved on to the last and final child, smiling down at the smallest child's tiny hand as it grabbed onto Santana's finger.
"Anubis Alejandro." Santana finished, looking down at the boy with a deep frown. "He's not gonna die, right? He's doing better?"
"He's doing good for just getting out of surgery, honey. Have faith. I have a feeling he'll pull through." Destiny clipped the chart and looked over the six little babies, returning back to Santana. "Do you want to go see Grace? I'm sure someone will switch with you if-"
"No." Santana shook her head, taking her finger back from Anubis and letting her eyes dart over the children. "I...I want to keep an eye on them. I promised Grace I would protect them. I don't want them to be alone incase something happens."
"No one will steal them." Destiny chuckled, squeezing Santana's shoulder as she passed and unlocked Wesley's incubator, unhooking a few wires. "Besides meeee."
"Where are you taking him?" Santana whined, watching Destiny coo down at the baby. "Hey, that's my son!"
"And my grandson!" Destiny poked her tongue out at the annoyed Latina. "I'm going to run him over to see Grace, and I'll bring you Pierce. Deal?"
"Deal." Santana nodded, sticking her fingers into Wiley's incubator and looking down at the adorable little naked rat with a smile, giggling. "You are so ugly. It's cute."
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"Isn't he pretty, Acey?" Brittany whispered, running her fingers through the baby's dark fuzz of hair from the hole in the incubator.
Grace lay on the bed watching her child with tired, dull eyes. She didn't speak, only shrugging softly and watching her son hold her girlfriend's finger with little movements from his breathing.
"He has brown eyes." Brittany continued as Ella sat behind Grace and gently brushed her hair to prevent tangles in the hospital bed. "Looks like brown hair too. Just like Piper, Finny, and Ángel."
"Their skin will settle. It's just irritated, new, exposed. Pierce is one of the healthiest in the group." Ella reassured her silent daughter.
Brittany returned her attention to the monitor where Grace's heart rate was being tracked. She looked back towards Pierce with a slightly disappointing smile, hoping Grace would want to interact with the child.
"Hi, Piercey," Brittany whispered. "I'm your...Bee. Your Mommy's here too."
Grace's eyes flicked over Brittany. She frowned a bit and watched her girlfriend interact with the child, feeling her mother's fingers work behind the comb in her hair. Her fingers inched out and barely touched Brittany's thigh against the bed.
The blonde pretended not to feel it, not wanting to push Grace away or make her uncomfortable in her current state. However, she turned towards the door when she heard a soft knock, smiling when Destiny rolled in with an incubator.
"I come with a gift!" Destiny winked at her wife, kissing her lips as she rounded the bed, parked the baby, and rearranged the two incubators. "I brought Wesley to see his Mommy. I think he was flirting with the nurse in the elevator. Winked and everything."
"Beanie, do you want to say bye to Pierce?" Ella whispered, rubbing Grace's shoulder.
"Bye, Piercey." Grace quietly responded, eyes anxiously following the baby's incubators as her mother moved them around. She looked up at her mother and frowned. "Piper?"
"Piper is still in surgery. Little Noob is resting." Destiny answered, pushing Wesley against Grace's bed and rubbing the clear rigid container.
"Don't call him Noob." Ella laughed, shaking her head at the nickname.
"Noob. New. Newborn. Same-same." Destiny giggled. She turned towards her daughter and gently tapped her nose. "Do you want to hold him? I can help you get settled."
Grace's eyes widened slightly, shaking her head as she looked at how small the child was. She scowled, absorbing the way Wesley's olive skin was still a little discolored and most likely fit in her two hands alone. She shook her head again, smushing down into her pillows as tears entered her eyes.
"Take him back to Tana."
"Gracie," Ella whispered, kissing her daughter's head. "He's okay. Let him lay on your chest for a little bit. Talk to him, Beanie."
"I don't want to." Grace refused, quiet and unsteady.
"Can I?" Brittany asked, glancing between everyone. "I can lay next to Grace and hold him?"
"No, n-no, no. Take him back," Grace mumbled, shaking her head and turning away from the child. "Take him back...Take him back."
"Why don't we give her a break from the babies, honey?" Ella whispered, sending her wife a look. She turned to Brittany and nodded to the baby incubators. "Can you help Destiny bring them back, Britt? Check-in on Anubis for me. Make sure Santana's not going insane upstairs."
"Sure." Brittany smiled.
Brittany leaned down and kissed Grace's head, squeezing her hand. She watched the girl for a moment, sighing when she didn't react, before turning and taking Pierce's incubator where Destiny directed.
"We'll be back!" Destiny called to her daughter as Brittany followed her out of the room.
Ella waited for the door to close behind the blonde before she lowered down fully beside her daughter and kissed her head. She gently massaged her cheek, smiling caringly at Grace as she laid her head on her pillow.
"You did it," Ella whispered as Grace tried to look away with tears in her eyes. "Baby, you did the impossible. I am so proud of you. Please don't beat yourself up, Mija."
"How couldn't I have known about them all?" Grace whispered, lip quivering. "I-I almost killed my babies, Mommy. It's my fault they're all sick. I-I shouldn't be their-"
"No, baby." Ella shook her head. "You did everything right."
"I want to go home," Grace whispered, leaning into her mother and whimpering softly. "I...I just want to get them out of here and...and go home. I want to see my babies. Lukey sleeps with me sometimes, Mommy."
"In time. You just had major surgery." Ella kissed her daughter's ghostly pale skin, saying a silent prayer that everything would work out with the babies and their mother. "I'll ask Abuela to bring the triplets by to see you. I promise Luke has loved sleeping in her big girl bed. Sometimes she even sleeps with King."
"I don't want them here. Don't let them come back here." Grace whimpered, squeezing her eyes shut and trying to close her fists around her mother's hands. She weakly gave up, still feeling extremely exhausted from the last two days. "I want to go...go...go home."
"Soon. I promise."
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Brittany watched in concern as Santana paced around the babies in the NICU while Quinn stared down at Piper like she'd jump out of the incubator and make a run for it. It had been a few days since the children had been born, and the three had practically lived in the hospital any moment they could around school, work, and extracurricular activities.
All the babies seemed to be doing well compared to the frightening first forty-eight hours, so there was little room to breath now.
"Hi, Baby G," Brittany whispered, brushing her gloved finger against the little girl's tiny legs. She smiled when Georgianna's leg moved at her touch. "So tiny. Just like your Mommy. So pretty."
"They're all tiny like their Mommy." Quinn chuckled, looking away from Piper when Santana paced by her to check on Finnegan and Ángel. "Santana, you're giving our children whiplash. Take a Xanax and sit down before their blood pressure rises again."
"Are we really calling this kid Fitz or Finn?" Santana asked, looking down at their oldest child. "I'd rather call him Hades. If Finn didn't drive off the fucking road to his failed wedding, maybe-"
"Gentle voice, Dada," Brittany whispered, caressing Georgianna's skin. She looked up and sent Santana a sharp look before looking down and smiling at the little strawberry-blonde fuzzed baby. "Finn and Mike delivered your brother. Didn't they, Georgie? They saved Mommy's life."
"Mike delivered the baby. Not Finn. Mike may have saved her life. Not Finn. That's it," Santana snapped, crossing her arms hostilely.
She knew Quinn was annoyed with her constant attack against the boys, but they had a plan. A plan that would have made sure their family was safe, and now Santana was watching her children struggle to breathe more than she was sleeping. In Santana's opinion, Finn Hudson deserved the massive slap she gave him when they arrived at the hospital.
One of the Unholy Trinity should have been the first to hold their son, not Finn Hudson. They should have been there for Grace in her cesarean section, not the boy who tried to screw them over. They may have been friends, but Santana wasn't going to release her grudge just yet.
"Finn caused her enough stress to go into preterm labor. He should have been driving better. Safer! She's traumatized from not having any epidural or anything to deliver with. She can't even look at our kids without crying!"
"He did his best, Santana! Let it go," Quinn stated, shrugging. "You can always call him Hades. If Grace wants his name to be Finnegan, it's Finnegan. I am not fighting on it. We almost lost her and if she wants their names to be whatever they are, they will be."
"She's lucky she almost died," Santana grumbled, shaking her head and looking down at the little boy. She took a few breaths before relaxing a bit when she spotted those little honey eyes. "I wished you looked more like marshmallow Finn, Skinny Mini. Wait till you meet your Abuela. You'll gain some weight. I bet you'll be a heart breaker with that face...better than Finn. You're the better Finn."
Santana looked between the two boys with a soft chuckle, reaching in and touching Ángel's little feet. She bit back a smile as the baby's hand moved, toes wiggling in response to being handled.
"Hola, Ángel," Santana whispered down to her son with an adoring smile. "Hazte más fuerte para mí, hijo."
"Girls."
Santana, Quinn, and Brittany all turned toward the door when a voice spoke up. They smiled a bit and gave Isabella their full attention when they noticed an unpleased-looking Grace in the wheelchair.
"Gracía is going to hold one of the bebés." Isabella declared, pushing Grace further into the room and nodding to a nurse as she followed inside after them.
"Which one would you like to hold, Momma?" The nurse asked Grace, whose eyes bounced around between the babies with a small frown.
"I don't want to-"
"That one." Isabella shrugged and pointed to the baby on the far right. "She's holding a baby. The tiny one. It will get better when Grace holds him."
"How about I hold him?" Quinn offered, ignoring the look Isabella sent her when she walked toward the nurse.
Grace leaned back in her wheelchair and watched as the nurse carefully opened Anubis' incubator. She looked away, chewing on the inside of her cheek and meeting Brittany's eyes when she kneeled down beside her. Her eyes followed the blonde's hand as it rubbed the arm of her chair.
"Anubis is doing really good." Brittany smiled, tucking Grace's messy sleepy hairstyle behind her ear. "He's on oxygen, but his surgery went well. Oh! And he looks like he's gonna be blonde, Acey! Like Luke and Lilly. He has such pretty blue eyes too."
Santana squeezed Brittany's shoulders as Quinn kneeled down carefully in front of Grace with the premie against her chest.
"Blue?" Grace anxiously sat up a bit to see the child, mumbling as she tried to look. "Blue. Blue."
"Yeah. Blue, baby. They could change later, but they're so pretty." Quinn informed her girlfriend.
She smiled and shifted to hold Anubis where Grace could see him better. She smiled at Santana when the young mother reached out, frowning softly when the girl touched the oxygen tube instead of the baby.
"Is he sick?" Grace asked, glancing toward the other children. "Are they sick? Did I make them sick?"
"No." The nurse shook her head and adjusted a few of Anubis' wires. "They are fortunate to have a Momma as strong as you to make it through all that."
"Are they sick?" Grace whispered, leaning away from Anubis when Quinn moved closer. "Are they sick? Are they sick?"
"Sick, no. Recovering." The blonde nurse motioned to Anubis. "Anubis had a grade 1 hemorrhage. Very minor, but his doctors went inside and cleared the fluid to be safe, considering the babies were early. We'll keep an eye on his brain, but he is improving from the last images we took. Just needs a little help breathing at the moment. Which is normal with all early babies. All of them need time to strengthen their lungs."
Grace's lip quivered as she reached out and touched Anubis' tiny black hat. She observed him carefully, drawing back and folding her fingers into her lap.
"Do you want to-"
"No." Grace shook her head, the fear of breaking the fragile child creeping up on her.
"Acey, it's okay." Brittany rubbed Grace's arm with a concerned sigh.
"Blue," Grace mumbled with a soft whimper. She looked down and let her face twist as she began to cry. "Blue, blue, blue, blue, blue..."
"Grace." Santana tried to get her attention, but Grace continued to cry.
"Blue, blue, blue, blue, blue..."
"Gracia," Isabella whispered, hugging the teenager from behind as Quinn quickly moved Anubis back to the nurse when he began to cry as well. "Oh, cariño. Está bien. Él está bien. Mi pequeño girasol, ten fe en el señor. Todo estará bien."
Santana's eyes burned as she watched Grace cry into her grandmother's hands. She took a small step back, looking over the children behind them, before returning to watch Quinn and Brittany try to comfort their girlfriend. She sniffled, wiping under her eyes quickly, before reaching out to the nurse before she could close up Wiley's incubator after checking on him.
"Can I hold my son?" Santana asked, biting her lip when a few tears fell down her face. She hated hearing Grace cry, adding in her obsessive mumbling of the word blue like someone was holding a gun to her head. "While...While you have that open? Please."
"Sure, sweetie." The nurse nodded, carefully handing Wiley over to Santana.
Santana held the baby in her hands, looking down at the little boy with a watery smile. She turned to where she could see Grace, trying not to let the guilt and anger she's been feeling since their children's unexpected birth get the best of her. She looked down and held Wiley up towards her face, lips wobbling as she smiled at the undersized boy.
"You are the ugliest kid I have ever met," Santana whispered, chuckling lightly as she held her face to Wiley's hat, careful not to let her lips touch his skin in case Grace fussed at her like she had with Lilith two years ago. "But one of the most beautiful boys I've ever seen."
Quinn stepped back to let Brittany comfort Grace, not wanting to crowd her as she whimpered softly into the girl's chest. She waited for Isabella to direct Grace back out of the room before she turned to check on Santana.
Her heart stopped when she spotted Santana holding one of their children, a smile tugging onto her face. She crossed the room and gently rubbed Santana's back, standing where she could see her with her chin on her shoulder. Quinn held Santana's waist and leaned her head against the Latina's as she looked over Wiley with a small smile.
"Do I call you Momma now? Another name?" Quinn whispered, squeezing Santana's hips with a teasing smile.
"You know..." Santana smiled. "I'm kinda okay with being Dada. It's grown on me."
"As long as you're sure, San," Quinn whispered, reaching over and brushing her fingers over Wiley's foot.
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Quinn carefully walked into the NICU with Lilith's little hands in hers, guiding the toddler toward her new siblings. She fixed the large cap on Lilith's head, picking up the toddler with a soft chuckle as the big pink gown crinkled under her hands.
"Baby." Lilith pointed to the children.
"These are your little sisters and brothers," Quinn explained, taking Lilith's wrist and pointing with the child's finger. "That's Hades, Ángel, Wesley, Wiley, Pierce, Piper, Georgie, and Anubis. You are the biggest sister to all of them. Like you're the biggest to Luke and Loui."
"Big sister?" Lilith scrunched up her face thoughtfully as she looked over the multiple babies.
"You are the big sister." Quinn kissed her cheek, moving towards Piper's incubator. "And this is your little sister, Piper." She pointed to the incubator on the other side. "And your baby sister, Georgie. Can you say Pi-per?"
"Peeper," Lilith whispered, leaning towards the bandaged baby. She looked at her curiously, tilting her head. She looked to the next baby and frowned. "Peeper?"
"Georgie." Quinn corrected her. "Can you say hi to Geor-gie?"
"Gerrgee." Lilith waved at the baby. "Hi, baby."
"Yes, hi, baby." Quinn chuckled. She moved towards Piper and pulled up the chair beside the incubator, setting Lilith on the chair and gently taking her hands. "Be gentle. Very gentle."
Lilith let Quinn guide her hand inside the incubator, touching Piper. She frowned when Piper wrapped her fingers around her tiny fingers and partly Quinn's finger, looking up at her mother.
"Why it have no eyes?" Lilith asked, trying to poke the fabric covering Piper's eyes. She grunted when Quinn moved her hand back towards her sister's hand. "Dead?"
"No. How do you even know what dead means?" Quinn groaned, rolling her eyes. "She's not dead. She's sleeping. The nice doctors cover the babies eyes when the lights are on so they don't hurt their vision. So they sleep better."
"Baby es mine?" Lilith asked, face serious.
"The baby is your little sister." Quinn kissed Lilith's head and gently brushed her finger over Piper's arm. "Do you know what that means?"
"My baby wake?"
"Your sister is sleeping, but..." Quinn gently took Lilith's hand out and turned the child around to face her, kneeling, so they were the same height. "I need you to do Momma a big favor and be the best big sister to your new siblings. And Luca and Loui, okay?"
"Nice to 'ukey and Loui?" Lilith asked, looking around their area of the NICU.
"And the babies. Yes." Quinn nodded, holding Lilith's hands with a small smile. She watched Lilith's face scrunch up as she looked over the babies beside them. "Can you tell Momma how you're feeling, Lillypad?"
"Uh..." Lilith pouted a bit. "Sad."
"Why is Lilly sad?" Quinn asked, taken back by the toddler's response.
"I wan' Mommy." Lilith leaned forward and whined as she grabbed Quinn's shoulders. "I go Mommy. Please. Please. Go Mommy."
"Let's go see Mommy." Quinn nodded, kissing Lilith's cheek and picking her up off the chair. She took Lilith's arm and waved toward the eight incubators. "Say by babies."
"Bye ba-beees!" Lilith giggled, waving for a second before hugging Quinn's neck.
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The world was spinning around Gracelynn as she sat on the edge of her bed, lost in her thoughts.
Grace's gaze stared through the clear plastic of the incubator as she rolled her thumbs across the palms of her hands. She breathed slowly in through her nose and out her mouth, trying to calm her heart rate so the beeping through the room wouldn't sound so aggressive.
"Hi," Grace whispered, exhaling through her parted lips. "I'm...I'm...I'm glad you're okay. Alive. I'm glad you're alive."
She blinked back her tears harshly. Her shaky fingers touched the locks on the incubator, slowly twisting and pulling the door down to reach inside.
Grace's hand ghosted over Finnegan's small form. She bit her lip and tried to lay her hand down on his body as gently as possible. The last thing she wanted to do was harm her son more than she believed she already had. It had been her greatest fear to hurt or fail her children, and now she felt like she was faced with precisely that.
Grace felt like if she couldn't keep her children safe in the womb, how would she keep them safe in the real world?
"I'm your Mommy, Finny," Grace whispered.
The back of her fingers gently caressed the brown-eyed boy's caramelly olive skin. She moved it up and touched the dark fuzzy hair sticking out of his maroon Beanie. Her fingers moved to the white stitching. The corners of her lips tugged upward at the Fitz stitched into the little boy's hat. Quinn came up with that nickname, though Grace wouldn't have minded Finn or Hades.
"You're so pretty." The teenager continued to talk to her son, unaware of the body now leaning in the doorway watching her. "You know...now that you aren't so dirty and wrinkly. I kinda felt bad because you were really ugly when I first met you...You're not that bad now."
"Insulting the baby?"
Grace jumped in fright when she heard a noise behind her. She quickly took her hand out and locked the incubator back up with a soft thud of the door, holding it closed with trembling hands.
"I'm sorry." Finn apologized, crossing into the room when Grace looked at him with tears streaming down her face and a ghostly look in her eyes. "I didn't mean to scare you. Is it okay if I visit?"
"You're already in here," Grace grumbled, tugging Finnegan's incubator an inch or two away from the boy toward where she was sitting protectively.
"Is that Little Finn?" The boy smiled goofily as he sat a bag down beside Grace on her bed and leaned to look inside the incubator, touching the colorful name tag the mother had made for her child. "Wow. He's so big already. They really do grow like weeds."
"Yeah." Grace nodded, eyes darting from the bag beside her to her child. "What's that?"
"Oh!" Finn reached into the bag and pulled out a small box, looking at the packaging quickly and wincing. "Uh, n-nipple butter? For your...boobs?"
"You walked into a store and bought me nipple butter for my boobs?" Grace asked, raising her brows in amusement when the boy turned a deep shade of pink.
"I had help, but, uh..." Finn reached into the bag and pulled out a snack bag with an awkward rub on the back of his neck. "Rachel said lactation cookies were normal to eat after pregnancy. I heard you hadn't been eating much, and I know you like cookies, right?"
"Do they taste like real cookies?" Grace asked, narrowing her eyes and taking the bag from him.
"I don't..." Finn's eyes widened when Grace held one out to him to try. "I don't want to lactate everywhere."
What the fuck did this boy just say?
Are we surprised?
"You're an idiot," Grace grumbled, popping it in her mouth and looking back toward Finnegan. She sighed, looking back at Finn and offering him a weak smile. "But thanks."
"No problem." Finn chuckled, pulling over a chair. "Quinn told us you were having a hard time with the babies."
"Did she? Hm." Grace's eyes didn't look away from her son as she ate another cookie. "And I thought your...Rachel was the blabbermouth." She looked up slowly and smiled tensely. "I'm sorry for ruining your wedding. It wasn't my intention, even if I considered it. I wouldn't actually have ruined your wedding...I don't think."
"It's okay." Finn chuckled.
As Finn looked down at the baby between them with a fallen expression, Grace frowned and looked back down at Finnegan. She pulled him an inch towards her again, silently letting the football player know not to touch the child, before taking a few more glances towards Finn.
"Why are you all depressed?" She asked. "I'm the one that has eight preemies, three toddlers, and three teenagers to worry about."
"I got in a fight with Rachel," Finn admitted, running a hand through his hair. "I...I actually fought with her right before we were supposed to come here. She told me she would just ride with Camren instead."
"Oh, she did?" Grace asked, slowly eating another cookie and avoiding Finn's eyes.
"Yeah."
"That's...not suspicious at all." Grace mumbled under her breath, before raising her voice so Finn could hear her. "So, uh, are you two...together still or are you single?"
Finn looked up from Finnegan and observed Grace as she chewed on her cookie with the help of some ice chips in her cup beside her. He slowly shook his head when Grace's curious eyes met his.
"No." He said, confusing Grace with his regretful tone. "We got into an argument talking about our future plans. I tried talking about my future and..." He shook his head, rolling his eyes. "I feel like I have no future if it interferes with Rachel's dreams. I feel like Rachel might...might want me to be someone like Kurt, or Camren, or Victor, Aria maybe?"
"Maybe one of them," Grace mumbled, not meeting his eyes.
"I'm not Broadway." Finn continued as he leaned back in his chair. "I thought about going to California with Puck and working on his pool business. Or...I don't know. I want to provide for my wife as her husband."
"Nothing wrong with Rachel bringing home the bread if you're not a hobo on her couch." Grace shrugged, unsure what to say. "But don't you want your future to be about you even a little bit? You have such a big ego sometimes, I would have thought you'd think more for your own wants and needs."
Finn looked at Finnegan as he stretched his little arms above his head and made little fists before relaxing again. His thoughts rolled through his mind for a few long seconds, before looking back to Grace.
"When you imagine your future, do you-"
"No." Grace interrupted him, shaking her head. "I don't imagine my future. I can't."
"You can't?" Finn frowned.
"Quinn is Ivy League material. Santana's..." Grace smiled slightly and looked into her bag of cookies. "...going to be some top cheerleader with great grades and the biggest ambitions, which she'll always succeed in. Brittany's a genius. She could be anything, but her love for dancing is everything. She's going to go places. They all will."
"And you?"
"I'm a mother," Grace whispered, looking down at Finnegan. "I'm...I'm...I'm a mother. I'm a mother."
Finn reached over and rested his large hand on Grace's when she frowned down at the baby. He offered a small smile to the young mother when she glanced up at him, then down at their hands.
"You're more than just that." He said.
"You're more than Rachel's coat rack." Grace shot back, moving her hand away from Finn's to grab a cookie. "Not like you care."
"I do care." Finn protested.
"Then stop being such a pushover." Grace snapped, angrily chewing on her cookie. "Stop deciding your future around other people. Stop-"
"Doing what you're doing?" Finn cut in, not letting Grace's glare affect him.
"Don't make me slap you. I have eleven kids to think about."
"I'm pointing out the obvious," Finn argued. "All you ever talk about is what Quinn, Santana, and Brittany are doing. In the three years I've known you, I've never heard you think about yourself and your needs for your life!"
"You're pointing out exactly what you're doing. Fuck off."
"You mean you."
"You're an idiot." Grace scoffed, rolling her eyes and looking away. "At least dream for yourself and stop letting Rachel do it for you, Finn."
"I wanted to be a professional football player, but the recruiters didn't like me," Finn explained, smiling disappointingly when Grace guilty looked away from him. "I don't know what I'll do with myself. I don't know what my future is."
"Yeah, well, maybe we just don't have to know. Sometimes...just dreaming is enough, right?" Grace shrugged with a sad smile. "I...I...I applied. I wasn't sure I would go, but I wanted to know I was good enough. I wanted that validation for once in my life. To feel good about my talent, my love, my being."
"And?"
"I wasn't good enough. Four times." Grace sighed, clearly upset by the information. "Guess that proves that."
"You weren't accepted?" Finn gasped in surprise, frowning deeply. "But you're so go-"
"No, you fucking idiot. I wasn't! I'm not good enough in Lima, and I'm not good enough outside of it!" Grace snapped before pausing and wrapping her shaking hands around herself. She looked down and sighed. "Sorry, I...I can't take my...I feel off. I hate people. I'm on edge. It's worse. I feel worse than I did when I was pregnant. I don't get it."
"It's okay." Finn stood up from his chair and plopped down on the hospital bed beside Grace, throwing his arm over her tense shoulders. "You know, those colleges don't deserve you. You're good enough, Grace."
Grace relaxed a little and looked up towards her friend, meeting his eyes. When he flashed her a goofy smile, Grace looked away and rolled her eyes. She sighed dramatically and moved Finnegan as close to her as possible, looking down at her son to avoid acknowledging the embarrassing frustrated flush on her face.
"I'd say something nice about you, but you're kinda shit at football compared to other kids," Grace whispered, placing her hands on the clear plastic and looking towards Finn again, looking away when he arched a brow. "You are good at other things, though. Not everyone has to be some stupid fucking famous shithead on Broadway or on the TV or...or in art school."
"You go to art school to learn things, right?" Finn asked, rubbing his hands over his jeans and taking his arm back when Grace smacked it.
"Yeah." Grace looked at him as if he had said the stupidest thing she had ever heard. "You learn art in art school."
"Why learn if you're already...amazing?" Finn asked, shrugging his shoulders.
Grace's teasing facial expression slowly disappeared and was replaced with a soft, almost appreciative look. She didn't let her emotions show too much, only a few peeking through her mask. She opened her mouth to thank the boy, intending to tell him that was exactly what Grace needed to hear with how she's been feeling these past few agonizing weeks, but her attention turned towards the door.
"Finn?" Quinn shot Santana a look as the Latina glared at him, walking inside with Luca in her arms. She walked over and kissed Grace's cheek as Finn quickly slipped off the bed and stood along the opposite wall. "I didn't know you were visiting."
"You can leave now," Santana stated, letting Luca lean toward the bed when the child whined for her mother. "Here, real baby daddy's are here."
"You don't have to leave," Quinn reassured the boy when his face flushed bright red.
"Mommy. Mommy." Luca giggled, crawling across the mattress to the green-eyed Cuban.
Grace snatched Luca up from the bed and hugged her tightly. She closed her eyes and held the back of her head as she slowly lowered down to lay on the bed with her second oldest child, kissing her ear and nuzzling her face.
"It's..." Finn rubbed the back of his neck as Grace clearly ended their conversation. Figuring she wanted time with her girlfriends and children, the boy shook his head. "It's okay. I need to go pick up stuff for my Mom. I'll visit you tomorrow, Little G."
Grace nodded, not looking toward Finn and focusing entirely on her daughter as she curled up with Luca in her arms. She rubbed her face along Luca's, much to Quinn and Santana's relief, smiling softly when Luca returned the loving gesture.
"I'll, uh, see you guys." Finn nodded to them as he turned to leave the room, smiling towards Brittany when she bounced inside with a grocery bag and a pillow pet under her arm. "Bye, Brittany."
"Hi! Bye!" Brittany spun around and waved at him as he left, waiting for the door to close before she bolted to Grace's side and kissed her cheek. "Look, Acey, I found you a Pillow Pet!"
"I gots Moo, Mommy." Luca giggled, pointing to Quinn. "Momma. Momma. Me Moo!"
"Yes. Yes. I know, baby." Quinn laughed, lifting the strawberry cow Pillow Pet her daughter begged for when they picked out a pillow for Grace. "We also got Loui an Eeyore and Lilly a Panda."
"We got you the Pumba." Brittany giggled, lifting it to show Grace with a wide smile. "Oh my, gosh! Isn't it so funny looking?"
"Yeah." Grace chuckled, nodding her head. Her head whipped towards the incubator when Quinn opened it and frowned. "What...What...What are you doing?"
"I'm just picking him up." Quinn carefully showed her hands. "Can I pick Fitz up, honey?"
Grace hesitantly nodded, watching Quinn apply hand sanitizer and begin situating Finnegan in her hands. She watched Quinn anxiously as she cradled the little boy in her arms, smiling down at him with Santana not far from her.
"Feel better than this morning?" Brittany asked, slipping onto the bed to sit with Grace and kissing her cheek. She picked up Luca when the blonde tried to crawl off the bed. "Hey, hey, sit with Mommy, Luke."
"Ba Baby," Luca whined, pointing at Finnegan with wide eyes.
"Mhm. Your brother! Like Lolo," Brittany explained, rubbing the toddler's back as she sat on her legs and watched Quinn with curious eyes. "That's Fitz."
"Feet?"
"Fitz."
"Feets?"
"Close enough," Santana smirked when Luca giggled and reached out for her. She grabbed the toddler and lightly threw her up, catching her in a hug with a sloppy kiss on her cheek, earning a bunch of giggles. "Silly girl! We have to be quiet for Mommy and Fitz. Shhhh."
"Shhhh." Luke giggled, playing with Santana's cheeks.
"Quinn?" Grace spoke up quietly, eyes not moving from Finnegan as the blonde swayed back and forth.
"What's up, Sweetie?" Quinn asked, looking up from their son.
"Can..." Grace nervously bit her lip and rubbed her thighs with her palm. "Can...Can I hold him?"
Surprised and delighted by the question, Quinn forced herself not to react when she noticed Brittany's face light up, and Santana turned towards them. She nodded, smiling softly as she moved towards the side of Grace's bed.
"Of course, baby." Quinn shifted Finnegan and held him out towards Grace, waiting for the brunette to support his head and back slowly. She leaned over and kissed Grace's temple when she took their son into her hands.
Brittany hovered close as Grace looked down at Finnegan in her hands. She gently reached over and guided the child closer to Grace's body, rubbing her back so she would relax some of her tension.
"Good girl," Brittany whispered, nuzzling her nose across Grace's ear. "You are such a good girl, Acey."
"I don't want to hurt him."
"You won't." Quinn sat down on the bed, rubbing the brunette's arm. "And you never did."
"Grace."
Grace looked up at Santana as the Latina stood at the end of the bed with Luca in her arms. She was awarded a slight, proud smirk from the other Latina, glancing down at Finnegan.
"Somos latinas. Protegemos a nuestros hijos. Has hecho un buen trabajo, Palomita." Santana said, kissing Luca's cheek when the blonde pushed her face against hers.
"I'm scared," Grace admitted with glistening emerald eyes. "We...We...We didn't plan on eight. Or now. Or-"
"We didn't plan any of this." Brittany reminded her, rubbing her back.
"But that doesn't mean we can't do it." Quinn shared a look with Santana, both girls trying to hide a smile as they focused back on Grace's conflicted gaze on their son. "You can do this. We're going to be with you every step of the way."
"I..."
You're gonna drop him.
You'll hurt him.
You hurt him.
You can't do this.
You're a danger to your son.
You can't do this.
"I-I-I....No." Grace's heart monitors spiked when Finnegan began crying, hands trembling as she struggled to hold the boy close to her. "No, no. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay."
"Ace, try and relax." Brittany encouraged the teenager, but Grace only began to cry with the child.
"Okay, okay, it's okay." Quinn quickly took Finnegan from Grace when the Cuban's hands shook more than their son liked. She sighed in disappointment, letting Brittany help Grace calm herself as she swayed and tried to bring peace to Finnegan very carefully. "Shhh, Fizti, it's okay. Momma's got you. You're okay."
"Ac-"
"Get her out of here, Santana." Grace snapped, looking between Finnegan and Luca with tears streaming down her face. "I-I don't want them here. I want them to go back. Take them back. Take them back home."
Luca's lip quivered when she noticed her mother crying into Brittany's arms, along with Finnegan. She whimpered and shook her head, beginning to cry in discomfort.
"Mo-Mommy."
"Get her out of here." Grace sobbed, shaking her head into her hands. "She has...She has to go. She has to go. She...She...She has to go. No, no-"
"Grace-"
"Santana, take Luke for a walk." Quinn hit the nurses' button quickly, shooing Santana out of the room with Luca.
"No. I don't want them at the hos...hos...hospital." Grace cried, hugging herself tightly around her abdomen. "I don't...I told you no. I told you no. I told you no."
"Look at me. Grace lay down with me." Brittany tried to lay Grace back, but she growled and didn't let Brittany push her down.
"Stop! Stop! Stop!"
"Grace, you're having a panic attack." The nurse informed her, checking the monitor before grabbing the oxygen mask and slipping it over her patient's head. "Breathe. Deep breaths for me...You're okay."
When Grace showed no signs of calming down after several attempts, the nurse quickly instructed another nurse to take Finnegan back to the NICU. She took a syringe from another nurse as they came into the room and moved to inject it into Grace's IV tube.
"Hey, hey, what are you doing?" Santana asked, holding Luca to her chest from where she was hovering outside the door. "What are you giving her? It's just a panic attack! You don't have to drug her up!"
"I'm giving her a sedative. She's had it before." The nurse admitted, pushing the back of the syringe before Santana could protest. She turned to the angered Latina and sent her a stern look. "Miss Lopez, I understand your father works in this hospital. If you have concerns about a drug, talk to him. But Grace is my patient, and she is far too fragile right now to let her body panic like this multiple times a day. I'll be calling a psych consultant in a few hours."
"There's nothing wrong with her. She doesn't need a consult. She's got some OCD and depression. We have it handed!" Santana hissed, standing tall against the taller and older woman. "We could have calmed her down without some drug."
"She's had panic attacks at least four times a day for the past week, Miss Lopez. If I believed that were true, we would have done something different. Her body and brain are exhausted. You are not the mother here. You do not understand what she's going through."
"I understand enough! You still should have talked to us first be-"
"Santana." Quinn hissed, grabbing her arm and yanking her away from the nurse. "Stop it! It's okay. They're trying to help her."
"Thank you." The nurse mumbled, side-eyeing Santana as she walked past her.
Santana gritted her teeth and oversaw the nurses as they checked Grace's monitors. She stepped back, letting Quinn move her to the other side of the bed by the tight grip on her arm away from the woman. Her eyes didn't leave the woman's movement, her heart racing through her frustration with the situation.
"Cut it out." Quinn hissed, taking Luca from her girlfriend with her typical pissed-off look. She stepped towards Santana and narrowed her eyes at the Latina's glare. "If you need to leave to get some sleep, go. Do not bring that energy in here with our kids."
"Whatever." Santana held her hands up in surrender. "It wasn't me. It was Snixx."
"Mhm." Quinn rolled her eyes.
"Good girl," Brittany whispered, holding Grace's oxygen mark to her face as her eyes drooped, and the brunette laid back down with quiet whimpers. "I got you. You're okay. Just relax."
Brittany adjusted so Grace could lay on her shoulder, holding her cheek. She gently kissed the skin on her head and looked at Quinn and Santana with a disappointed smile. Even though they had made some progress, Brittany couldn't help but feel just as helpless as Quinn and Santana when it came to assisting Grace through this heavy brick wall of anxiety and depression.
"It's okay," Quinn mumbled against Luca's winter beanie, swaying to calm the sniffling toddler. She turned her body so Luca couldn't see her girlfriends, rubbing her back comfortingly. "Mommy's gonna be okay. She's just not feeling good."
"Mommy sad?" Luca mumbled, leaning into Quinn's chest as she hugged her neck and tried to peer toward Grace.
Quinn sighed, taking a quick look over her shoulder at the drowsy teenager now lying with Brittany and Santana. She blinked back her tears and returned her focus to her daughter.
"Yeah. Mommy's a little sad, but everything will be okay." She quietly whispered, biting her lip and hugging her daughter tightly.
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Babies, Babies, Babies.😅😂
Grace?🥺
Finn?🙊
Santana?😂
The kids?😂
Thoughts?
As you know, sometimes we stray away from the story line of the show, which will happen some towards the end of Season three and going forward into season four. This is to benefit the plot and the characters. There will be some things that stay the same as Glee, but there will be some things that change as well to fit. This will make more sense later when reading!
Personally, season four could have been better in canon, so we will be making it better with our own OCs, plot changes, etc.
Thank you for all your support!
Thank you for reading!💜