B A E K H Y U N
I don't get nervous before missions. I haven't felt the the jitter in my bones and the accelerated, irregular heart since my very mission. I stopped growing nervous before these kinds of things long before I was a leader, how can I lead a group onto a battle ground of they can feel my nerves?
I should be paying attention in this meeting, listening to my team as we sit around the table in the meeting room, upstairs at the bar. We had our meeting with NCT, we had a basic plan down, which should have made me feel better, yet there was still something gnawing at the back of my brain.
The talking of my team was muffled, my ears held a slight ring that I could only hear in between the loud thumps of my heart and my slow breaths. I took the time to move my eye around the room, settling on each and every member of my team.
Kim Junmyeon, my second in command and my longest friend. When I was promoted to team leader and given instructions to pick my team members carefully as they will be my team for life, I knew he had to be on my team.
He had the face and look of leader, frankly everything about him screams leadership. Somehow, even with being younger than me, he managed to show me uttermost respect, he followed every command that I ever gave to him, even before I became his leader.
He quickly fell into the self-appointed role of father figure, seeing as some members lacked that in their life, me being one of them.
When I went through my darkest moments of trying to navigate this leadership thing, he was always there to pick me back up and keep all of us on our feet. When I struggled with my own guilt from my own actions, he told me that I have other people to think about before myself.
My eyes travel over to the shorter male with black rimmed glasses and short hair, the quiet hacker. He was a harder cookie to crack, he came from a hard life and had the 'I don't need anyone's help' kind of attitude, I think I pestered him for months about joining my team. Every time I asked him, he told me to piss of and that he's a lone wolf.
He knew how much off a hot head I could be, so it was no surprise that I found myself in fist fight with another agent that had something smart to say about my family.
When I reached my maximum capacity of rage and anger, and there was nothing that could stop me from breaking that kids nose, Kyungsoo stopped me. I think to this day he only joined because he didn't want me killing anyone.
The next to join my ranks was Kim Minseok, the crazy explosives expert that managed to fool everyone by his feline exterior. His now ebony mullet that used to be a bleach blonde buzz cut when I first met him, lay curly and over his eyes as I look at him.
"I'll plant these minor bombs around the place as a backup-backup plan." His voice was still muffled, yet I still managed to stifle out a laugh at his explosive tendencies.
I still remember each and every time we had to evacuate headquarters because he caused a small explosive in the explosives den. Every team needs a person who isn't afraid to handle a live grenade, he was a wildcard but he was so worth it.
Next was Park Chanyeol, he never used to be this muscular and built. When he first joined the agency, he was tall and lanky with an attitude as big as he was. There was something about the slightly younger guy that I found really admirable, he wasn't embarrassed by little things and was willing to take anything on.
I admired his need and want to be better, he would get the shit kicked out of him at training and he always got back up. I wanted him to be better, I wanted him to be the greatest, so I made sure to do that.
When he finally let down those serious walls and started opening himself up to us, I didn't realise how much I actually needed him. He became my platonic soulmate, and I will do anything to make sure he gets a better life than he was dealt.
Zhong Yixing, the first Chinese person to join the agency all together. I remember him very clearly, he was the guy that struggled to hold a gun, he failed all of his bomb exams and always came last in combat. The agency were so close to letting him go, saying the couldn't find a role for him beside a desk jockey.
I saw him. I saw his potential, I didn't want every member of my team to be the best fighters or the ones that can shoot bullseye after bullseye. I want a team of diverse people, where without the other our team would fail.
Because that's exactly what we are, a team, a family and I really don't know what I would do without these guys. I saw him drifting a police car one night and immediately knew, he would be our get away driver.
The sensual Casanova, Kim Jongin, wasn't apart of the agency when I met him, he was actually a target we were ordered to get rid of from the casino by the owner. He knew how to talk, his charisma was dripping from his pours which made it harder to hate the guy.
He was persuasive and sneaky, he made you focus on him and only him so he could cheat at card games in front of him, in front of everyone. From the very moment I sat down at that table with him and noticed that look of want and power behind his eyes, I knew I had to have him on my team.
Oh Sehun was the youngest and the most dangerous, he was a ghost and the aim on that kid was something to be feared. He was also not an agent when I met him, he was labelled as a contract sniper. Rich people would hire him to take out certain people they either had confrontation with or were in competition with, he didn't care who they were, he was just doing his job.
I remember the day on that rooftop, where he threw his sniper bag down on the ground, pulled his mask off his face and asked if I was going to arrest him. That was when I looked at his face, even though he was the tallest person I'd ever seen, he was only a kid. I told him that I had a better offer for him.
These are my team members, my family and I will do anything to protect them.
After moving around the room, my eyes finally land on the gorgeous girl seated beside me, playing my with my fingers that were on her lap.
She laughed at something Chanyeol and Yixing were saying, probably something perverted. Her chocolate brown eyes found mine and I couldn't help but smile.
She was apart of us now, our family. I will not rest until every single member around this table is safe and out of harms way, I owe it to them for staying by me all these years. As for Chaeyeong, I will marry you someday, but if something happens, please run.
o
Blurry, everything was burry and the buzzing in my head was louder than ever. My hands warm, oddly warm. Within seconds my hearing came back and I was thrown back into reality.
She was groaning in pain, crying loudly and sobbing as tears ran down her tanned skin, her blonde hair was matted with blood as it clung to her face. Her hazel eyes were bloodshot and were full of pain and sorrow.
Taeyeon.
My hands were applying pressure to her wound on her stomach, her warm blood coated my own hands in a sticky fashion. My own tears ran down my cheeks. "Stay with me, Tae. I can't lose you!" I cry to her.
She places he bloodied hand to my sodden cheek. Suddenly her face changes, her creamy vanilla hair is now jet black, making the blood harder to see and those deep chocolate brown eyes bore into mine.
No. No. NO.
"Go, Baek." She whimpered out, pain obviously ripping through her body as she spoke. "You need to go!"
I woke from my sleep, hair sticking to my face as I try to regain control over my breathing and my heartbeat. It was just a dream. I quickly look to my right, seeing Chaeyeong sleeping peacefully. It was just a dream.
I pull my knees up to my chest, resting my arms over the tops of them, trying my hardest not to let those bastard tears fall. Yet with another look at the love of my life next to me, I couldn't hold them in any longer.
Biting my lip in order for my sobs to be less noticeable, I let them fall, the guilt of my past picking tonight to be the best time to rear it's ugly head.
"Hey, hey, hey. What wrong, baby?" I was so caught up in myself, that I didn't feel Chaeyeong stir next to me. She put one hand on my back to rub small circles, while the other one found my found my face, whipping way the tears that had fallen.
"Just a bad dream." I managed to choke out through sobs. I need to tell her why I'm so worried about this mission and her involvement with it, I thought I wouldn't feel this way, but apparently not.
"Do you want to talk about it?" She asks softly as she moves to sit closer to me, continuing her comforting circles.
"I do, I really do." I say to her, my eyes meeting hers as she tries to read past them, like she trying to read my soul.
She nods her head before standing up on the bed, moving to sit back down in front of me. She pull my hands closer to her and wraps her fingers through her own. "I'm all ears."
"Years before you came into the picture, we had a female member, she was Chanyeol younger sister. She was a great fighter and I admired her a lot, after spending so much time together, things kind of just fell into place for us. During a mission I got reckless and so did she. She ended up getting shot, it hit a vital organ and she was bleeding out in my arms, it was all my fault."
"What was her name?" She asks me softly, still maintaining the gentle eye contact with me, not hint of jealousy or anger.
"Park Taeyeon." I whisper out, not having said her name in a while.
Chaeyeong moves closer to me, if that was even possible. "I'm sure Taeyeon doesn't blame you for what happened, because it wasn't you're fault. If she's anything like her brother then I'm almost positive she would want to slap you on the back of the head for feelings that way. You can't cheat death, Baek. It's set in our destiny, everything happens for a reason. What happened in the past is in the past, focus on the present and what's to come in the future."
I take my hands from her hold and place them on her face. "Chae, if anything happens to me, you need to run. Like you said, you can't cheat death. I want you to live your life to the fullest, whether it has me in it or not." I say to her, tears falling down her cheeks as well as mine. She nods her head, probably to afraid to speak because her voice might give out. "Eun Chaeyeong, I love you.
"I love you too, Byun Baekhyun."
|| Author's Note ||
After 41 chapters I finally decide to make an appearance...
Hi!! I'm ashacherries, you can call me Asha or Lily.
Thank you to everyone who is reading and enjoying this book, I really didn't expect it. Sadly, this book will be coming to end soon. Big Sadge. I don't have a set chapter limit, but I do know this book is almost finished.
Before I go, I am going to do some shameless self-promoting.
If you are interested In Seventeen, then I have an enemies to lovers, faking dating called 'All My Love' in the works.
I also have a new one that I have spent the last month or two writing everyday for. It's a NCT Racing AU, mainly focusing around Dream but the other members will make an appearance. It's called 'Burn Up The Road'
Okay, I'm done. Thank you all again for reading this book. Feel free to chuck a like or comment, it really means a lot.
<ashacherries>
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