"This is so lame. I didn't even prepare how to confess..." Off said. "But it's you."
At first, it didn't register in his mind what Off had just said to him. He just stared the hell out of him until he finally returned to reality. He doesn't know how to react, especially when those words came from him. It's not just like him, but he is the person Off was talking about, the person he likes even when they are in their junior year.
Mix and Arm are arguing about something that he didn't even bother to know. He's surprised, but he remains neutral in his facial expressions. He tried not to make everything so awkward between them. He chuckled and said, "If you're being serious, what makes you like me?"
"Being you." He answered fast and honestly. He appears to be prepared for whatever New may ask of him.
"You like spoiled kids? Gosh, you need to think right."
Off nodded. "I've been thinking about this for years already. Do I need more time?" He answered. Right before New could answer, Off cut him off by answering his question. "I don't, and I'm ready. Remember when you asked me why I didn't help you out back then despite knowing you liked Tay? It's because I like you. Plus, I still can't accept the fact that all of people you are the one I liked."
"Yah! Off Jumpol! Why are they being quiet there?" Arm yelled at his friend.
"Why don't you just believe me? Off and Gun broke up. That's it! So, for your information, Mr. Vihokratana, we don't tolerate cheating here. Off is free to pursue New whenever he wants."
There is so much happening inside the bus. New has no idea what they are fighting for. He is still in a process when Tay suddenly mention his name.
"Does Off like New?"
A smile formed on Off's face. "I'm here. Why don't you just ask directly?" He spoke nicely despite getting a little annoyed.
Tay's jaw hardens after hearing Off's response to him. He sounds like his friend is challenging him. "Do you like New?"
There was a moment of silence when Tay asked. They were waiting for an answer, but before that, he took a glance at New, who was looking at him. Off is trying to read his face. He doesn't know if the young man would like everybody to know Off's feelings or not, so he is kind of hesitating to answer, but at the same time, he does want to tell them, especially the guy behind him.
Everyone is ready to hear his answer.
He realized that Off was depending on him. So, he sighed and began speaking. "Go on, you don't need my permission."
Off gave him a friendly smile. "I do like New." He said this while keeping his gaze fixed on New.
Tay's fist clenched. For some reason, he doesn't like it. After Off confirms that he likes New, something in him explodes. He now understood why he had assumed New liked Off. From the way they cared for and were close to each other, he can't be blamed for thinking like that.
Everyone is having a mix of emotions with this sudden confession.
Mix is having a mental breakdown due to being a fanboy of OffNew ft. Earth stopping his boyfriend. Arm is still completely perplexed. Namtan was concerned for her friend.
It's like they are having a whole party inside the bus, but everything is ruined when Tay decides to shoot his last loaded gun.
"But New likes me." Everyone became silent.
Tay caught them off guard. Never in their wildest dreams did they imagine Tay saying it. All of them were speechless and didn't know how to respond to that. Aside from being surprised, it's the truth.
"Mother fucker." New murmured. He didn't hide his feelings just to be exposed like this. He feels like his tears will go down whenever. He lifts his head to stop it.
What's the point of saying that to everyone? Why does it seem like it's easy for him to say it? does he think that my feelings for him are just a game? New asked himself. He said it like it was nothing. he only said that for his own sake, to annoy Off. Sometimes, Tay is really hard to read.
Off's smile slowly faded. He nods and bites his lips. "I almost forgot that part." He said, like Tay, he was also annoyed. Now they are sharing the same emotion, just like 'best friends'. "Thanks for reminding me, bro." He sarcastically said.
After that, the whole trip is full of silence and awkwardness between them. Though, Off still didn't stop caring for New. He still makes sure he's comfortable enough on this trip.
They arrived at the resort exhausted. They were caring for their full bag for 1 week of staying here, and all they wanted was to lie in their bed. One of the staff members shows them the way to their house.
"Ugh! Finally!" Mix groaned after entering the house.
As expected, the house is big, with enough space for eight people. It has a big window that lets you see the beach outside. There is also a pool, as Namtan said. The house is also two stories.
They went up to see the four available rooms. They didn't waste any time and went to their room.
"New, is it really okay?" Namtan asked before he could enter the room. He took a glance inside, seeing one bed.
New shrugged. "It's fine." He response.
"All right, then," Namtan said, "go downstairs later."
But before he entered the room, he saw Tay and Bella entering their room. He just wished that he was sharing rooms with Tay instead. To see him so happy while talking with Bella broke New's heart. Tay used to smile like that when he was with him. He can't help but reminisce they had before.
Off is sitting on the floor, already unpacking his things to put them in the cabinet. "Do you need me to help you with your things?" Off asked him.
"I'll do it later," New said. The sadness is evident in his voice as he sits on the corner of their bed. "Off, may I ask you a question?"
"Sure. What is it?"
"Why didn't you have the courage to confess to me before? Why now that my feelings for Tay are getting deeper?"
Off rose slowly and sat down beside New. Off's lips formed a smile just thinking about those days. "I almost did." He answered.
New raised an eyebrow. "Almost?"
Off nodded. "It's the day of our school festival."
"I wonder if you want to study here in Bangkok."
"I want to study here, P'" Off answered, trying not to sound annoyed.
Off was having a video call with her sister, who lives in Bangkok. His sister always tells him to live and study there instead of in this small town. He always responds that he will think about it or that he will think about it in college. He doesn't want his sister to feel that he doesn't want to live with her, so he will come up with excuses as much as he can.
"Oh, for the first time, you answer me honestly. You always make an excuse for yourself not to go. What's with you?"
Off scratches his head. "Nothing, it's just that you always mention me going to Bangkok."
However, his sister is still not convinced by his answer. She gave him a grin. "No way! You have someone you like there, right?"
Off was caught off guard by his sister. His face became as red as a tomato. "W-What are you saying? I don't!" He denies.
"You're my brother. How can I not know? I can smell you all the way here." her sister keeps teasing him. "Was it Gun? I remember that kid who keeps telling me that he wants to marry you."
Off sighed at her sister's imagination. "P', several years have already passed. We were both 7 at that time. Besides, he probably likes somebody else in his new school."
"Whatever, you always make excuses. I will go now."
"Wait, P'!" He stopped his sister from dropping the call. He scratched his head for the second time before speaking. "I-If I tell you I like someone... would you help me look good?"
Her sister grinned at her and laughed at her brother's reaction while asking him a favor.
"Ey, I knew it."
The day after, her sister sent him a bunch of products that she recommended. Perfumes, sunscreen, moisturizers, cleansers—just the basic skin and body products. Off indeed wanted to look good for the person he likes.
He didn't tell anyone about this, not even his best friend, Tawan.
After a month of practicing this bunch of routines he needs to do, people tend to notice the difference it has made for him. His schoolmates noticed how his skin became more and more clear. Not just his face but his overall appearance slowly made him popular among his schoolmates, but still, that person seems like he didn't notice the changes he made.
"Things to do to get cooler..." Off reads as he types the letters into his phone one by one. He clicked the first article that came up as soon as he entered the keywords. "Being an athlete?" He read.
"Yah, Off Jumpol!" Arm called him and placed his arm on his shoulder. Off immediately closed his phone and put it in his pocket. Arm noticed how suspicious his friend was. "Are you watching porn?"
"Go away." Off pushed his friend away from him.
"Let me join! I want to watch too!" But Arm continued to cling to him.
"Go way, you're soaking in sweat. Stop! I don't watch porn—"
Arm cut him off. "If you're not, then you might be stalking your crush, let me see~"
"W-What crush? I don't have a crush." He denies.
"Yes, you are. I'm gonna tell everyone about it." This time, Arm tries to flee, but Off clings to him just like Arm did before. "Tay! Mild! New! Off is stalking his crus—"
"Fine! I'm watching porn! I'm watching porn! I'm watching porn!" Off shouted out of desperation not to let Arm tell their friends about him having someone he likes.
He's still not prepared. Besides, it's risky since he likes someone in their circle of friends. They stopped after seeing a foot in front of them. They both slowly looked up to see who the person was, and Off's blood went down after knowing who he was. He is holding a broom and looking at them with those eyes. Off's heart was beating like a drum and his hands were like waterfalls.
Earlier, he just searched for ways to be a cool guy to make the person he liked notice him, but now he is looking at him nervously like an idiot.
"Nong New, you're here. You're cleaning, I see. Did your adviser punish you again because of your awful attitude?" Arm inquired, but was ignored for n times. "You know, I'm the only one who understands—" he stood up and reached for his shoulder, but New grabbed his arm and twisted in his back before he could.
"Get lost." New pushed him away while whispering in his ears. Arm groaned as he walked away from them.
Off watched Arm walking away, leaving him alone with this kid. On the other side, New's eyes were glued to Off, and the most interesting part is that he was smirking at him. "Porn, huh?" he said. "Before you do anything, ask yourself. Is it worth it?"
Off was unable to speak. He wanted to explain himself, but his lips wouldn't move. There's no sound coming from his mouth. It feels like being numb. New left already, he didn't even move a bit. It is still processing in his mind.
He didn't even understand what New wants to convey with that. All he knows is he's not okay and he regrets yelling that in front of him. He doesn't want New to think that he's a shameless person.
"Hey." Off came back to his senses when he heard Tay's voice.
"O-oh, why?" Off mended himself.
"Are you okay?" Tay asked his friend because he looked so pale and uncomfortable.
He nodded in response. "What's up?"
"Arm told me—"
"That guy!" Off knew
Tay chuckled seeing how his friend react without even hearing what he wanted to say. "So, it's true?" He asked. It's kind of bizarre, ever since Tay met Off, he never show an interest in liking or pursuing someone. He never mention things like this, or maybe he was just hiding it.
Off sighs. "Whatever Arm told you, don't believe it." still, he denies it.
"How will I not believe him if you are acting this way? come on, Off. We are friends here, aren't we?" Tay said while Off looked away. "Who's the lucky person?" He asked and bumped his shoulder into him.
He was anxious since Arm nearly caught him earlier. Knowing him, it's hardly unthinkable that he may tell the entire school about it, but when Tay asked him, there was nervousness and sadness in his chess. Even looking into his eyes directly is impossible. It seems unjust. He felt he had committed an illegal act and was therefore guilty.
He's not stupid enough not to notice what's between the two.
He knows. Everyone knows.
What could happen if Tay would stop acting like a child and take a hint?
What could happen if New finally took the courage to confess his feelings for Tay?
Instead, he looked at the frowning person who was sweeping not far from them. Then he realized something. 'Before you do anything, ask yourself. Is it worth it?' New was right. He better ask himself first if it's worth taking a risk. After all, Tay is his best friend.
Tay noticed Off looking in New's direction. He let out a small puff. "It wasn't New, right?" He asked nervously, trying not to sound concerned in the least.
Off chuckled. "What's with the way you ask that question?"
Tay was caught off guard and scratched his head. "W-What—nothing. You know, New is a difficult person to deal with."
"Arm is right. It's like you are gatekeeping New from everyone."
"I was not!"
That day, Off decided to let go of his feelings because he value their friendship. This will be a conflict for him and Tay if one day, his friend decided to acknowledge New's feelings for him. It can also create feelings of resentment and break trust. He doesn't want that.
His feelings will also disappear if he ignores them. That's what he thought.
And he's wrong. Each day his feelings grow deeper, deeper than he ever thought before. He tried many ways to make his feelings disappear as fast as he can. To the point that he avoided his friends for a short period of time. He will go home alone, sometimes only with Mild, and play basketball with others without inviting Arm and Tay but later on, he gave up as it doesn't seem working.
At the party, not only Tay was jealous of Earth hanging out with New. There was a guy who silently prayed that this day would end.
New was pissed after knowing that people mistook them as brothers. So he tries to make Tay jealous, and he successfully did it.
"Tay, it's fine," New said. "I'm not your brother." He added.
Off managed to calm his friend, Tay. The game started but his mind wanders until he got chosen by the bottle. Mild asked him to name a person he wanted to date. Of course, he refuses to answer but the consequence of it is going to that locker. Arm even lied about him remembering that Off told him that he liked someone here. Though it's not completely a lie since he does like someone here he didn't tell Arm that. Just to end the discussion, he lied about introducing that person to them at the festival instead.
Hoping that they will forget it the next day. If not, he has an idea of who can help him.
The bottle spun again and it landed on Tay. Off didn't waste this chance to make everything clear not only to himself but also to Tay and New.
"Aside from being friends, do you see New as your younger brother or... something else?" crossed his fingers he said but instead of knowing the answer, the two ended up going inside the locker.
He can't help but laugh at himself. "Jokes on you, Off."
"Are you okay?" Mild asked.
"I'm fine." Off said.
"But your eyes said otherwise."
"That's how it is." Off said and drank the remaining alcohol in his cup.
"I gave up on my feelings for Tay and accept everything," Mild said with a long sigh. "I decided to be a matchmaker, don't I sound stupid?" she said laughing at her own joke. Off didn't laugh because he knew that the words has painful tears behind them. Mild liked Tay for a long time and she's ready to give up those feelings. He wishes that he was tough as she is.
"Tawan... what a lucky guy." Off said. He was a person that liked someone without effort. All he needs to do is exist and they will like him the way he is.
Off poured liquor into his cup. He grabbed it and was ready to drink it but before he could, Mild said something that made him stop.
"I hope that while I try to match them, I'm not causing pain to someone." It's not directly meant for him but the way she said it, she knew something but Mild is someone who can trust.
"It's not your fault if it does." Off said.
"Suit yourself then."
The day after, the three of them are together going around the school. There were students from different schools who visited for their school festival. That's why it's a little bit crowded. He is supposed to meet his childhood friend, who wants to marry him based on his sister but if there are so many people it seems impossible to meet him.
Tay keeps asking about what happened last night. Tay said that New was mad at him for not remembering what happened. They didn't even know what happened to them inside that locker. Off can't imagine what happened to the both of them, it's either New already confessed, Tay, admitting that he also likes him, or... kiss.
Which makes Off pissed. Pissed because he's jealous and pissed because Tay is being careless again. New must be disappointed.
Instead, Arm brought back what Off promised to them. With the power of bitterness and annoyance, Off confidently agree to introduce them to the person he wants to date. He took the lead and the two followed him. They went to the senior first year's floor, on the floor where New is.
He can feel the confusion between the two but he keeps going and stopped in front of New's classroom. He is nervous but he can't turn his back anymore, he's here. He is ready to face the consequences but before he could open the door, Tay held his hand and stop him.
"It wasn't New, right?" Tay asked.
Off can't hide how surprised he is by his friend asking him. He opened his mouth to answer him but the only word that came out from his mouth was "Tay." So he removed his hand and proceed on opening the door.
He will confess today.
But he was disappointed seeing New with someone.
"Gun," he called.
"What a great way to stop me from telling the truth." Off said to the guy beside him. They stayed inside the room while the others left.
"It's not worth it," Gun answered. "You will end up hurting your friend."
Many things happened after Tay's grandmother passed away. Tay disappeared without a word, which caused New to go back to who he used to be. Off barely talk to him. He always isolates himself inside their house and goes to school once a week.
Not so long, his sister took him to Bangkok. He has no communication with Tay, Arm, Mild and New.
Gun and him dated for two years but ended up breaking up.
It turns out that Gun's friend's boyfriend is Earth. He is also the one who told Off about Tay and Arm. He didn't waste any time and contacted them. Tay is already an owner of the cafe and Arm is one of the employees there.
Maybe the world is indeed small.
They decided to meet each other at Tay's coffee shop. He didn't mention Mild or New's name, that's why he assumed that he would meet only the two.
If he and New cross paths again, he hopes this time he meets him first. Every day, he wonders what could happen to New. Is he still in town? Did he go to college?
Does he still like Tay? If not, he is dating someone?
He went to the address Tay gave him. Before he could open the door, he recognized someone facing backward at the door. He never felt this happy after he left the town.
"Reunion my ass, just the three of us?"
He's still the same New he knows. Off finally opened the door. "Who said just the three of you?" He was nervous, just like when he was a teenager, whenever New was around, but his feet automatically went to him and hugged him.
"I missed you." he unconsciously said.
"Me too."
Hello, sorry for the long wait. I made this extra long compare to other chapters for Off's confession haha. So yeah, I explain some things happened in previous chapters, I hope you get it. Off likes New, that's the gist hahaha
Also, I'm preparing for the ending of this story since we are almost in finish. I will slowly reveal the truth haha.
The twist may catch you off guard, but that was the initial plan for the story. If I change the plot, you might find a scene that doesn't make sense for the reason I placed it there, so I can't change it whether you like it or not.
I'm a working student, so please be patient. I'm making every effort to update.
Just that. I appreciate you reading, and have fun! ;)