Why I hate Romeo and Juliet
Chapter One
A forewarning: I’m about to say ‘love’ a whole hell of a lot.
I’m not really a bitter old crone who hates everything. I just don’t like love. I don’t even like to say it. The word itself disgusts me. Love: it’s awful. For a while, I thought it was just in high school that people were all so sickeningly lovey-dovey. Boyfriends walking their girlfriends to class, holding hands – everything. It all just made me want to hurl.
It’d gotten really bad when my best friends fell into it.
That was another thing! People say they’ve fallen in love like it’s beautiful and majestic, involuntary action. It isn’t. Everyone else’s just too blind to see it. Love was blind, and it wasn’t just in high school.
Every love story, love song, quote, it all proves my point. It never ends happily. So why do we put ourselves through it? Why does Rose go with Jack? What makes Cinderella think she needs a prince? Why does Juliet follow Romeo?
Two out of those three stories end in death. The other one supposedly ends happily, but come one. Eventually one of them dies and throws the other into a depressing life as a widow. Nothing about loving someone ends happily.
Now don’t get me wrong – I would love people. I’d love my friends, no matter how stupid I thought they were for falling into the trap. I loved my Mom and Dad. I’d loved plenty of people. I would just never fall in love with someone.
Romantic love was just a sneaky way of hurting yourself, and I was not a masochist.
___
“Guess what, Hazel!” Jane shouted, running up to me. “Jordan said he loved me!”
I was lying down in the cool grass of the park. It was vacant of elementary school children who were already busy learning their 1, 2, and 3’s and A, B, C's, or whatever the hell they do in elementary school. Kids were probably home on outrageously early curfews set by outrageously protective parents. At those times, I began to be grateful that my Dad worked so many hours.
Jane took a seat next to me, so I didn't roll my eyes as I wanted to. I needed to be the supportive friend. “He did?”
“Yeah, I know, I know, it’s only been a month, and I know how you are about this kind of stuff, but just put that aside and be happy for me?” She asked, looking at me hopefully.
The last thing I wanted was for Jane to get hurt, but I decided a long time ago to not pull my friends into my crazy notions. Whatever mistakes she was going to make, she would – regardless of what I thought. It was none of my business anyway – no matter how much I wanted to protect her.
I nodded, sighing. “Sure.”
“Thank you! I like him so much, Haze, you have no idea.”
I did have an idea though. I was pretty sure Jane was just going through the puppy-love stage. You know, where she doesn’t even know what’s happening, but it’s enough to send her into a fit of giggles. I could see it in her eyes – they were already glassy with some sort of hope that this was the guy. Which was ridiculous; we were only in high school.
I wasn’t judging Jane. She wasn’t any less of a person to me because of Jordan. (And then I winced. Jane and Jordan - how terrible was that?). But Jane was still my friend, and I didn’t have a place to judge her when she didn’t judge me for my views.
“Are you even listening?” she frowned at me, noticing that I was already lost in my own head. Jane was really gorgeous, and for the longest time, I wondered why she didn't date, but I guessed she just never really liked any of the guys who were interested in her, until Jordan.
I shuddered again. Jane and Jordan would probably have kids named Joanna and Joseph and Jared and Jasmine and Jacob and…
“Yeah,” I broke from my inner thoughts, remembering that she was actually talking to me.
“Excited yet…?” Her voice trailed, expecting an answer. I looked at her blankly.
Smiling sheepishly, I drawled, “For…?”
“I knew you weren’t listening to me," she groaned, but didn't stop to let me apologize. "I asked if you were excited for school,” she stated, a tad bit upset - but she would get over it. She always did.
Now, I loved her, I really did, but sometimes I couldn't stand listening to Jane.
“I’m sorry, just had a lot on my mind,” I yawned, looking down at the grass, flitting my fingers over it.
“You’re crazy, you know,” she muttered.
“Thanks,” I said back, inherently. I’d been called crazy too many times before, and now, the answer came naturally.
“So are you?”
“Am I what?”
Jane rolled her eyes, frustrated. “Are you excited for school? You know that thing we’ve been going to the past eleven years?”
A grin plastered itself on my face. School was always fun, and when your whole objective in life was to have fun, you could really go to town at school. I had a mildly bad record, and I probably wouldn’t get into a good college, but that was okay. I'd do fine regardless. Besides; college was for people with dreams and ambitions. I didn't have a lot of those.
My ambition? To have fun. And what other ambitions do you really need, other than that?
“Yes,” I flashed a grin.
“Try your best not to get expelled this year, okay? It’d be a shame to waste all of your life at school, just to get expelled as a senior and not get your diploma,” she lectured plainly.
Jane was one of those people – you know the bluntly smart ones. She'd get into a good college, get married, buy a house, and have babies who grew up to go to college, and get married, and buy a house, and have babies, and...
Well, you get it.
“I’m not making any promises,” I warned her, a silly smile still on my face.
If this was my last year, I was going to go out with a bang.
“You know I love the wickedness that is your mind, but I don’t want you to get expelled, Hazel. Please?” she continued to plead, staring at me with a hope that maybe, I'd get myself together this year. That maybe, I'd be a little bit more like her.
But we all have those moments, where we think we're right. Jane would just have to figure out that what was right for her wasn't right for me.
I stared into the tangerine sky. The sun was just setting, and it smelled like fall. “Like I said, I’m not making any promises.”
___
“You look good,” Jane told me, and naturally, I looked down at myself. I was wearing electric blue jeans and a tank top she had bought for me over the summer. It was bright purple with a white flowery design, and to form fitting for my liking.
“You have good taste then,” I retorted, shoving my hair into a messy ponytail. Jane had anally picked out my outfit for today, because apparently, 'first impressions are very important.'
I made sure to notify her that we'd been going to the same school with the same people for three years. She said it didn't matter, and the point still stood. I didn't want to argue anymore.
“I know,” she gleamed.
“What classes have you got today?” I asked, and while I loved Jane, I still hated classes with her. Where she was a goody-two-shoe, I was the opposite. And when she’d nag me constantly to not mess around, I couldn’t have fun.
“Chemistry, Literature, Calculus, Orchestra,” she said proudly handing me her schedule, reciting the classes even though I was reading them. “Tomorrow I’ve got Journalism, German, History, and Technology.”
“Damn, I’ve got French, Calc., Art, and Lit., then History, Chemistry, Gym and Study Hall,” I frowned, internally glowing. Block scheduling was the best.
“Lunch though?” she asked hopefully as I handed the paper back to her.
“For sure,” I grinned. “We’ll –,”
“Meet in front of the library?” She finished.
“Ask Macy?”
“Always,” she giggled walking off. In the distance, I saw Jordan smiling at her. She ran into his arms, and instantly, my gag reflex was thrust into motion. I turned around swiftly, but only to smack into someone’s chest.
“Watch where you’re going, asswipe,” I pushed him off, looking up to Mr. I'm-A-Brick-Wall.
And just because I wasn't going to fall in love, didn't mean I couldn't appreciate a good looking guy when I saw one. And my, oh my, he was just that – in almost a gruff sort of way. Maybe it was the eyes – cold and hard – that really got me...
“I’m pretty sure you’re the one who ran into me,” he pulled back, his expression softening. He was probably looking at me like I was at him. Well, probably not exactly like I was looking at him...
“I’m pretty sure you were the one inches away from me. Who gets that close to other people, I ask you,” I paused for a second, long enough to give him a chance to try to start to defend himself, but not long enough to finish. He opened his mouth before I cut him off. “Murderers. Yeah, that’s right,” I continued, not joking. No one got that close to me – sometimes, I didn't even let my friends get that close to me. “So unless you apologize right now, you little prick, I’ll scream bloody murder,” I grinned, looking him in the eyes. “BLOODY,” I began, but to no prevail as his hand came over my mouth.
“Quit being such a tire, and go to class,” he whispered huskily at me, a sign of pure irritation.
So I did the one thing I could in that situation, because when a guy much stronger than you clamps his sweaty paws over your mouth, you can only do one thing.
I’m not proud to say it. I’m really not, but I licked his hand regardless.
“Gross,” his limb went flying back, shaking as if to get my saliva off of him.
“You’re telling me,” I muttered while making a sour face. “Get out of my way,” I shoved past him to hustle to French.
I hated French.
“Bonjour, comment ça va?” The teacher called out, as she would usually on the first day of school. The class erupted in a series of mumbles. I let myself fall asleep, knowing that we wouldn’t do anything.
Time wasn't kind to me, as I felt like I'd only been asleep for a few minutes. “I’m up,” I muttered as the bell rang over head. “Oh,” I said to myself. The boy next to me gave a weird look, to which I just sneered while gathering my things and making way for Calculus.
And if there was something I hated more than I hated French, it was Calculus. Why did math have to be so complicated? So far, I didn’t have a single class with one of my good friends. I knew I wouldn’t be seeing Jane and Macy until Lunch, which was next.
For the duration of the class, I drew a bunch of shoes in my notebook. They were messy little sketches of the shoes around me: my own, the guy sitting next to me, the girl in front, the teacher who was walking around like a madman...
When the bell rang, I picked my things up quickly again. I wanted to get to lunch as fast as possible. I needed human contact, and as far as I know, no one in my classes could’ve been considered human. They were more like bland, mindless aliens than anything else.
“Hey guys,” I said, smiling briefly at Jane and Macy, as we met in front of the library.
“Hey!” They both chimed.
“Lunch?” I grinned, and they followed in suit, ready to see their boyfriends, while I was ready to see my boys.
Making my way through the lunch line, I only grabbed a sandwich and some juice. I wasn’t one for big lunches anyways, so don't call me anorexic. The three of us joined the guys’ table.
“What’s up Haze,” Lucas called to me, his words slurred together.
“Are you high Luke?” Jane frowned.
“No! What makes you say that?” He said defensively, his face contorted angrily.
I sat next to him and took a whiff of my best friend. “He’s definitely flying right now,” I laughed and elbowed him gently.
Lucas was a nice guy. He was sort of like me in the school department. He didn’t want to go to college, unless it was for basketball. Someday, he wanted to travel the world, and that I could admire.
“Mace, you going to eat that?” Nathan called across to Macy, pointing to her apple. “They didn’t have them when I went through the lunch line.” She shrugged and tossed it to him. “Thanks babe,” he grinned, taking a bite. Nate loved apples. He had one every day if he could. What was that old saying? An apple a day keeps the doctor away? That was Nathan in a nutshell.
“As long as you never call me babe again, I’ll buy you an apple every day for the rest of your life,” she shuddered, leaning into her boyfriend, Matt. Matt sent an approving look to her, and laughed at Nathan.
I grinned. Jordan and Jane were consumed with each other, in their own little world. Jordan and Matt were just additions to our table; mostly, it was Lucas, Spencer, Nate and me. But with having no classes with Jane, she'd tagged along, and it seemed like wherever Jane went, so did her boyfriend.
“Nate, take my tray?” I asked hopefully, taking my mind off of the couples.
“Sure,” he smiled taking my empty tray up to dump.
“Lucas, you’ve got to stop coming to school high,” Jane broke away from Jordan long enough to speak to him.
“Leave him alone, Jane,” I defended. “The guy’s only having a little fun.”
Lucas nodded aggressively, blurting, “I’m awesome.” Lucas wasn't really into drugs - he actually rarely got high. But it was the first day of school, and I totally understood why you'd have to be drugged up to get through it.
“So true, buddy," I patted his back as he laughed somewhat crazily. "So true."
“That tickles!”
“Remember to call me next time you decide to do this,” I joked. I’d only done drugs once before, and it wasn’t my cup of tea.
We each left for our next classes. I swiftly brought myself to the art room. “Hey Ms. Clayton,” I smiled.
Ms. Clayton was my favorite teacher. Whenever I needed it, she could bail me out of anything, and I sort of needed it rather often. “Good afternoon, Hazel,” she grinned. “Planning any major senior year pranks?”
“Only always,” I beamed, seating myself in the front of the class. I took out my sketchbook and began drawing the new vase in the front of the classroom. It was so pretty, I nearly didn’t notice the little prick from this morning as he swept into the room, just as the bell rang. Nearly.
“I’ll let it slide today,” Ms. Clayton gave him a wry, understanding smile.
Relieved, his eyes made their way over to me before hardening again. I glared at him, but that mischievous smirk from earlier caught way. He took a seat. And guess where it was?
“You,” I growled, showcasing my best scowl.
“You,” he shot back dryly, seemingly uninterested.
“Ms. Clayton?” I asked, raising my hand, eyes still trained on the imbecile sitting beside me.
“Yeah,” she nodded towards me.
“Can I get away from this dung-sucker?” I asked enthusiastically.
“Sorry honey, the rest of the seats are full,” she apologized, chuckling at my colorful insult.
He laughed too, unfortunately. “Did you really think I would voluntarily sit next to you?”
“Get over yourself, asshole,” I snapped, much too loudly.
“Calm down Hazel,” Ms. Clayton warned, smiling nevertheless.
“I would apologize for my language, but he provoked me.”
“You’re hardly innocent,” he mumbled, his voice melting coolly.
“Anyways,” Ms. Clayton cut sharply, “I haven’t gotten projects planned quite yet, so for now, just draw or something.”
Draw or something? I smiled to myself. Typical Clayton...
“You’re weirder than I thought,” I heard his husky voice mumble again.
“Oh boy, you wouldn’t even imagine.”
I admired my uniqueness. I had to. I’d been told I was weird too many times to not appreciate it. He ignored me for the rest of the period, and set his head down, sleeping. He looked nearly like a gentleman when he was out. Far more peaceful than that cold stare he wore the length that I knew him. I just kept on with my drawing, finishing details in it. It looked nice by the end of the period.
The bell rang, saving me from the lack of company. He still didn’t budge from the piercing sound over head though. I kicked his chair. “Wake up, asshole.”
His eyes lazily opened. “What?”
“The bell rang,” I said before walking away from him. I didn’t even get a thank you! I should’ve just let him stay there. Ms. Clayton would’ve eventually waked him up.
“Haze, you got Literature?” I heard Lucas call.
“Yeah man, you?” I looked around to find him. He was running towards me
While a teacher yelled at us to keep our voices down, I simply rolled my eyes, and Lucas didn’t stop. Instead he came at me, full speed, and nearly tackled me. I stumbled backwards from his hug. “We’re going to own this shit, man!” He said excitedly, not bothering to let me go.
“Lucas, get the fuck off me,” I laughed.
Luke was my partner in crime, and we had Literature together, last period. Life felt good.