I watched the small winged creatures waddle around and swim my eyes glued to the tank. I smiled when one of them stared at me and Gabriel, we were the only one in the wing at the time. Gabriel placed a hand on the glass.
The small baby penguins crowed at us. "Huh, did you know penguins have knees?" I laughed turning to Gabriel. "Yeah! Can you believe it? God did right when he put penguins on this earth." Gabriel grabbed my hand. "I'm sure God did much more good to the world than just penguins (Y/n)." He walked me down the wing and into the fish section filled with beautiful angel fish, clownfish, and rainbow parrot fish that glistened in the blue lights.
"God created such beautiful creatures." I pressed up against the glass poking at a jellyfish. Gabriel held my hand gently and lead me away from the tank to look into my eyes. "God loves this earth, he spared no expense to bring happiness to people. Everyone has something God had given them to love." Gabriel smiled before he walked over to the small touch pool, reaching in and scratching the back of a ray as it passed by his hand. I walked over to the tank watching all the fish scramble away once I walked over. Gabriel took my hand in his and lead it gently into the water. "Here." He said, I slid my hand into the cold water letting it dangle there for a few moments before a ray curiously brushed against it. It's back felt weird slimy and gross, the creature turned around and opened it's mouth to my hand and I swiftly pulled it back.
That was going to give me nightmares of the shallow abyss that was the inside of that ray.
I ran over to the hand washing station and washed my hands clean of the animal, Gabriel went back to touching the slimy creature before following me to wash his hands. When he was done he wiped his hands off and opened his phone checking the time.
"Come on, let's go somewhere." He said. Gabriel grabbed my hand and lead me away into the aquarium. Through the different wings, the fish, jellyfish, dolphins before he opened the door leading out to a large contraption. Gabriel hopped onto the large machine and held his hand out to me, the sunlight starting to fall behind the horizon accenting the way his face shined in the warm sunlight.
Bigo panoramic lift. I read on the sign. I looked at Gabriel as he moved into the machine helping me into it. "I thought it would be nice to get out into the open air for a bit." Gabriel lent me a hand and helped me up into the lift. "I love being up in the air. It feels like I'm flying."
Gabriel pointed at a seagull. "Seeing the birds fly into the sunset, free and without a care, it's serene for someone like me. I always wanted a bird. But I don't think we'd get along, with how earth-bound I am." I sat next to him as the machine lifted us up high in the air over the bay.
"I remember when I was young, my dad, he got me this white fluffy rabbit, down to earth right? I think that he was my spirit animal." Gabriel made a little bunny with his fingers pressing his middle finger and his ring finger against his thumb wiggling his pointer and pinky. I laughed.
"My ex, he gave me a raven. He has pure white feathers, I didn't want him but I felt like I was made to accept him. Since it was... You know a gift. At that time I don't think I could've said no to him."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Gabriel asked. I looked out into the horizon scooting away from him. "Well, I felt like if I didn't accept it. He wouldn't like me." Gabriel grabbed my hand when I was far enough away from him, a way of saying. "I'm here for you. Don't worry."
"You sound like you're suffering the sin of gluttony." He said rubbing the back of my hand with his thumb. He leaned against the seat and I turned to him. "Gluttony? What's that? Isn't it like food?" I asked, "Well in some ways yes."
"Gluttony, is the sin of giving up your freedom. The inability to say "no" and "yes" to things you want." He said, the orange glow from the sun reflected on his face. His serious eyes were almost dark orange in the light. His eyes bore into mine, serious and unmoving, it gave me the shivers. We sat there for a moment before it raised us higher into the sky, I stood up watching the world move slowly around me ignoring the look Gabriel was giving me.
"At the time. I just wanted him to be happy..." Gabriel let go of my hand and sighed out loud.
"At the expense of your own happiness." He turned to the sunset. "Well what do you want now?" He asked. I knelt against the seat and stared out the window. "I want to be strong."
"In what way?"
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked turning to him, there was a small smile gracing his lips. "Do you want physical strength to protect yourself? Or are you looking for emotional stability, for the strength to change yourself?" I looked at him and sat down next to him.
"I want to be strong enough to say, enough is enough, that I don't want that." I said Gabriel smirked and looked at me. "I want to feel abstinence." Gabriel moved hair out of my face. "That's a tall order. Taking your life into your own hands and following the virtue of abstinence. Do you really want to do that?"
"I think, it's the best way for me to get my life back on the right track." I said, Gabriel leaned his head on mine.
"You always have the right to say "no." (Y/n), never forget that you are your own shining light, and it's okay to need help from others, to want help from others, and I will never hold it against you if you feel weak." He grabbed my hand.
"Weakness is what makes humans, humans, and I promise you, that I will always be there, I will be there until you no longer need my help. Until the day you push me away."
I laughed, "Gabriel, you've already helped me a lot, I hope no matter where I am I'll still have your words to comfort me." Gabriel smiled pulling away and holding my cheeks in his hands looking me in the eyes, warming me with his smile.
"No matter where you are... I'll surely follow." The lift stopped at the top and Gabriel placed our heads together.
"God forgive me, I'm sorry, and here I said you had the right to say n-" His eyes glimmered in the sun and he started to pull away, I tugged him back in pressing my lips to his. I gasped out and Gabriel left hand held my arm tightly falling back in and kissing me the other went to my cheek holding me from dripping onto the seat into a mess, one hand curled in Gabriel's fluffy locks the other hand holding Gabriel's cheek.
His lips tasted rich, soft but they moved against mine gently, never to harsh for me to close my eyes tightly.
Gabriel's hand rubbed my arm before he pulled back holding onto my chin moving back to my cheek running across the cut on my cheek I winced but he drew back placing a hand on my neck. "I'm sorry, but when you make that face it's very cute, it's like an adorable child who got hurt and doesn't want to admit they are." He placed his head on mine and I laughed.
"Gabriel, is it okay for me to say yes to you when I'm practicing abstinence?" Gabriel laughed. "It all depends on what you want." He pressed a kiss to my temple. "Just as long you can control yourself." He winked at me and I wrapped his jacket around my shoulders. "I hope our relationship doesn't get in the way of your nun work either." He said wrapping an arm around me.
"Then you and I will just have to keep it a secret for now." I said pressing a gentle kiss to his lips the sun gleaming off our figures lighting up the fire in our eyes and the kindle in our hearts.
ooOOoo
Selever P.O.V.
"Selever, can you please just put the portal down, your girlfriends right here you've barely paid any attention to her!" Sarvente said walking past us. Sky crossed her arms. "No it's fine, he's just obsessed with it."
I crossed my arms. "I'm protecting them." Sky crossed her legs. "Oh I don't you mean stalking? Can you tell me which "them" you're using?" I curled my hand into a fist. I didn't reply to her, I huffed and sat back down summoning my portal to watch (Y/n) and Gabriel. He was getting to close to them. It was disgusting.
I should be the one holding their hand. Taking them out on dates.
"So what? Are you going to answer me?" I sighed aloud and threw the portal at the wall the rhombus breaking on impact.
"Do you ever stop complaining! I'm... looking at..." I turned away. "I don't trust Gabriel!" Selever yelled aloud. "Why? You've been watching him for weeks, he's never given you a damn reason not to trust him. He's a fucking angel for peat sake." Sky huffed, I pulled up the portal again. I hated waiting.
I hated watching how happy they were, with him...
"Have you ever considered that he's the one for them?" Sky said looking at her nails. I watched as (Y/n) tossed my sweater over the side leaning into Gabriel, I saw the way he looked at them. How soft his eyes are, how curious he is about them.
"What the fuck did you just say?"
Sky's eyes turned red at the challenge. "You heard me. Gabriel is good to them, were you ever good to them Selever?" I placed my hands around her neck.
"Are you going to do this to them if they don't agree to be with you? If they choose Gabriel over your, dumb, toxic, ass?" I let go of her slamming my leg into the wood of the pew. "Shut up!"
"Am I wrong? Tell me, if your so called "special person" walked through that door right now and told you that they want nothing to do with you what would you do?" I was silent. "That's right! You don't know, you'd probably end up attacking Gabriel." I kicked at the broken wood thinking about (Y/n).
If I didn't initiate the break-up they'd still be here with me.
They wouldn't be in a train car on their way to a stupid dolphin show. I could show them new worlds, filled to the brim with things they liked, what could Gabriel do?
What could Gabriel do?
I looked at Gabriel, he rubbed (Y/n)'s arm while they slept. They looked happy, peaceful in Gabriel's arms.
Arms that could protect them from the world if they absolutely needed to. Stronger than mine, softer than mine, I watched him hold them close on the train keeping them warm and away from the vent. The way his eyes never left them even for a second, as if blinking would cause (Y/n) to disappear.
"Selever, at least tell your mom. It's her younger brother. She'd have at least some resistance for (Y/n) dating him." Sky placed a hand on my shoulder. "I'm not doing this to help you, it's just pathetic seeing you like this, stooping as low as to stalk them, without them even knowing. That's lower than low."
Sky exited the church. "I'll come back later when Sarvente knocks some sense into you." Sky waved at me and walked out huffing on and on about how idiotic the whole situation was. But what else should I feel, I felt jealous, angry, I could treat them better than Gabriel ever could. I'd shower them with gifts, flowers until they suffocated on them.
If that's what they wanted I could do just that.
"So, Why. The. Fuck! Should they choose that halo wearing bastard over me!" I kicked at the pew again and looked at the cross.
"Are you mocking me up there? Are you laughing, this is all your fucking fault!" I screamed at the cross. Mom walked into the room hitting me on the head. "Watch your language, or go to your room!" Mom huffed and I turned away.
"I don't know what's going on but whatever it is you need to calm down." She said. "You've been on edge all week."
"I'm fine."
"You landed a CHILD in the hospital Selever." Mom placed a hand on her temple. "I don't understand you." I listened to her but I couldn't keep the thought of (Y/n) out of my mind.
"I don't understand you."
It's something they'd probably say to me. I smiled to myself pulling up the small portal staring at (Y/n)'s nervous face. They looked really cute. Like they didn't know how to be protected. I liked that face.
Because I was the only one who could protect them.
I missed the presence next to me, whether not I wanted them to be there or not. Suddenly my smile turned into a frown. I felt someone grab my hand but my eyes were locked onto the portal.
I wanted things to go back to the way they were.
Things were better that way anyways.
I don't understand why they are acting like everything is fine.
They aren't supposed to be acting like that.
They aren't supposed to be someone else.
Something is wrong with them.
"Selever!" My mom interrupted. "What!" I shouted back, mom grabbed my ear and tugged it firmly. "Are you listening?" She asked tapping her foot impatiently.
"Jeez mom! Whatever!" I said slapping her hand away, mom's horns showed. "Do you even care about your sister?" Mom dropped my hand and I snapped out of my daze. Moms eyes glowed red as she slumped down in the seat next to me.
"I still look after Rasazy, she's just reading." I said. "There's nothing to look at on her end anyways."
"So you're spying on my protégé!"
"It's not like that!"
"Then what is you're excuse to spy on them like this Selever?" My mom yelled.
"I'm protecting them!" Mom turned her head up she looked like she was about to pop a blood vessel.
"WHAT! Possible... THING, are you protecting them from?" She strangled the air. "They're safe!"
"They're with Gabriel!" I shouted and mom's eyes fell to the floor, she settled back into her seat. "Oh. Oh... OH." She said, Mom took off her habit running a hand through her pink hair. "Gabriel is there?" I heard moms shaky sigh mom was silent for a second.
"There's nothing to worry about then, they're in good hands." Mom placed her head in her hands.
"I trust-"
"Why? He cast you out!" I yelled at her, "How can you trust Gabriel when... he didn't come to get you?" I huffed and fell back against the seat. "God's strength? What a joke, he doesn't even have the strength to stand up to-"
"Selever shut up." Mom wiped away a tear that fell from her eye. "You can never talk about Gabriel like that." She said. "Not when Gabriel has done what he can." Mom was angry. "He made sure my exile was comfortable, if he really did cast me out, why would he try so hard to keep all his continuous blessings on the low, continuous blessings like our home, or you and Rasazy. Without Gabriel's blessings I'd be burning in my own hell. And that... scares me." I looked at her, Lucifer the fallen angel, afraid of burning in hell. "God made me a queen. The queen of the fallen angels... Gabriel... Gabriel made you a prince. Made Rasazy a princess. Just so I won't be lonely if Ruv ever left." Mom sighed out. "That way it won't hurt so much if he broke our vow."
I looked at her questioningly, "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Mom raised her head to the cross. "Gabriel is the angel of strength, but he's also the angel of fertility." I looked at the portal at Gabriel. He held (Y/n) tenderly to his chest as if he was protecting a child.
"He's a mothering angel who takes care of everyone while holding up the holy army on his shoulders." Mom wiped her eyes as she talked about him. "Imagine how happy I was to see him in heavens regalia dressed in the darkness of my dreams, when he came to tell me that I was going to have a son, and then a daughter with the man I cared about." Mom wiped her eyes. "It was the greatest gift God had ever given me."
"You and Rasazy were the greatest gift Gabriel and my father ever bestowed on me!" Mom dropped her habit and looked up at the cross.
"What if Gabriel wants (Y/n)?"
Mom thought for a second and sighed leaning back closing her eyes.
"You can't do that!"
Mom shook her head.
"Don't get me wrong Selever, Gabriel is too good for (Y/n). To put it bluntly. No matter how holy they are in life they will never be archangel material. (Y/n) has the potential to be an angel, but at best, a soldier in one of the many principalities of Heaven." Mom frowned. "Gabriel will be there to take care of them in their life after death."
Mom smiled suddenly.
"I don't necessarily approve of my baby brother getting himself a partner. He hasn't even had his four billionth birthday yet, he's still a baby." Mom smiled. "But, Gabriel has done so much for others, just to make them happy." Mom pointed to the cross a small symbol engraved amongst seven others. "Gabriel has put off his own feelings to train a stoic army. Feeds blessings to people, lifting them up so they can find who they are. To lead soon to be mothers and their children, all while carrying heaven on his shoulders, all while wearing a loving smile." Mom turned to me. "As his sister I only want the best for him. I want him to be able to change, to be able to relax from his duties and have some time to himself to just be Gabriel. With no title, with no wings and responsibilities. I want him to be happy for once, not forced to be happy and love everything. It's exhausting." Mom looked down and breathed out another shaky sigh.
"I think Gabriel suffered the most out of us eight. When I fell, he had to take care of the remains of the broken family I left behind, Gabriel sat in that toxic home alone, surrounded by people who he thought didn't care. And even so he still goes out and gives blessings, loving everything unconditionally. He had no time to serve himself while serving the word of God. Gabriel's never wanted anything before, because he never felt like he needed anything else but my fathers love." Mom suddenly stood up dusting off her hands before bending down to pick up her coif. Straightening it out. "He works so much on blessings, and the fact you can't understand how hard he works to stay in contact with us, to give us the means to provide for you kids, makes me ashamed." Mom closed her eyes before opening them up again.
"That's why. It's not much, but if (Y/n) makes Gabriel happier than he ever did in heaven, if they give Gabriel sanctuary like he gave to us, then I can only allow it. Gabriel deserves his happiness, selflessness doesn't always make a person happy about themselves, so that's why if they make Gabriel happy in his eternal life, then (Y/n) is my blessing to him." Mom dusted the coif off and tugged it over her head and arrange her hair, starting to walk away from me.
"So I can thank him for giving you and Rasazy to me."
I sat there looking at Gabriel, he checked (Y/n)'s face a worried expression on his face as he rubbed their cheek.
"There you are darling, look at you, your face is all scratched up."
(Y/n) looked at him fondly, I was envious, it wasn't fair that mom would let him just take (Y/n) away.
I didn't want to let them go. It isn't fair that Gabriel was such a good person.
I want to punch his stupid face in.
The way he tossed his ponytail over his shoulder, how his perfect hair fell over his perfect eyes. He was made in the most beautiful way possible. I huffed.
How was I supposed to compete with him. I wanted (Y/n)'s time, all the time for all eternity. I want him to watch me win over (Y/n). I could live the rest of my life knowing that I won against one of Gods archangels.
Besides its not about the prize it's about the game.
The game is addicting but the prize...
Now (Y/n) was just a prize waiting to be won.
And I intend on winning it.
"Why is Sarv storming?" I heard my father stood above me before sitting beside me.
"None of your business." I looked over at him as he stared up at the cross.
"How do you keep mom close like that. There's a bunch of better guys out there that could sweep her off her feet. Much richer and more handsome. No offense." Dad huffed and whistled for Matvei. The Raven flew down from the ceiling down onto his arm.
"Is this about the nun in training?" He looked straight through me. "Yeah, keep fucking talking." Dad glared at me and huffed. "I don't have to tell you anything, it's my business." We were silent for a moment and I watched my dad feed (Y/n)'s bird. The bird I gave them.
The one I KNEW they loved.
"Your mother is a different kind of case. She doesn't like being held down or told what to do. We both know this. She's billions of years old and some of those billions were spent following rules, following examples that she was expected to follow." Matvei curled into a small ball on his arm snuggling into dads chest.
"At some point in time she felt like an object in comparison to some of your uncles. She thought that her father didn't think she was good enough to take up tasks like Michael, protecting people, or like Gabriel." The name made me boil. "The opportunity to protect with his strength. Your mother, Samael, was in charge of guiding the souls into heaven, the angel of death, her job wasn't a pretty one, and I can tell why she was so done with it."
Ruv paused to look at Matvei.
"Sarv isn't some object, a prize, she's a person who has their own feelings and ways of doing things. I'm just here because we have a mutual understanding of each other." Ruv rubbed a finger on Matvei's head. "But this is about (Y/n) right?" He asked "A word of advice. Don't expect them change for you, and don't change yourself to match their new image." He let Matvei fly away. "Sometimes, a bit of change is good for a relationship, like trust, but you shouldn't be forced to change."
I thought about it. (Y/n) always agreed with me. It was like they didn't have an opinion for themselves. Became attached.
I blame them for getting to attached to me.
I didn't do anything wrong.
I'm just protecting them.
If they really loved me they'd come back to me and leave Gabriel.
I'm the one who makes them happy.
I don't need to change anything, I can go to hundreds of other (Y/n)'s in other dimensions.
If (Y/n) wants me to change then they can wait forever.
Because I'm not the one who needs to change.
"Are you listening?" I looked up at my dad. "Yeah yeah. Forcing stuff." Dad mumbled something under this breath and left me to sulk in my seat. I sat there for hours just thinking about what to do. How to bring (Y/n) back and away from that angel.
I shook my head and turned to the rising sun. I sat there for hours fuming in my jealousy. Hating the way Gabriel look at them. I huffed and turned to look at my portal again, watching the bright sun rise in the distance. I stared into the portal watching the sun set around (Y/n) and Gabriel. He held their hands placed their head on theirs. I wanted to rip those hands off his wrists.
"Weakness is what makes humans, humans, and I promise you, that I will always be there, I will be there until you no longer need my help. Until the day you push me away."
"No matter where you are... I'll surely follow."
(Y/n) grabbed his cheek pulling him into a kiss. Gabriel sighed out and pressed his head on theirs holding them close. How happy could (Y/n) even make him? Was he taking joy in stealing my partner? Mocking me?
But as he pulled back holding (Y/n) close there was something in his eyes. As if there was a place in his heart that was finally...
Filled.
"Oh Author why are you making my hot demon boy so toxic and awful!" Is probably what's going through your mind while you read this. And my response is "Because Readers Selever has to experience how toxic he is before he can change for you." Selever needs to see how Gabriel treats you readers and look inwards to learn that he can't just walk away from his problems.
Anyways! Thanks for reading this chapter! As some of you know I got in an emotional brawl with my editor and it made the past week very hard to write. It's hard to imagine life without someone until you're put in that situation. But now it's rectified and we're cool now so I can finally get back to the state of "Archangel Gabriel's creativeness has PEIRCED MY SOUL!" I'm a religous person and before writing I feel my soul actually call on Gabriel to assist me in writing, it's always exciting to feel his prescience beside me as I write. Because the thoughts flow in like honey while I get to feel his unconditional loving spirit energy flow through me like a river.
I give special thanks to him for watching over me as I write this book. And I give Special thanks to all of your readers who support me and have stuck with me! Ya'll are awesome! -Your author Blue_ablaze.