I storm past Ava's sleeping form without a second thought, my only focus on making my escape. Across the soft rug and through the hallway, my mind is a whirlwind of thoughts as my legs carry me downstairs and out the front door. My head is pounding, but I push on until I reach the lake. The gentle lapping of the water has a calming, almost hypnotic effect. I stand there, rooted in place until my legs give out, my energy drains away, and I collapse to my knees.
Lowering my head, I allow myself to wallow in self-pity, emotions warring within me. Half of them scream with what I know is jealousy, while the other half berates me for being hypocritical. I have no right to desire Liam. He's not mine, and I can never be his.
Ignoring the dampness from the grass seeping through my pants, the cold becoming a distant sensation, I stay on the ground until a small warm hand touches my shoulder, the shock causing me to flinch.
I turn my head and find Eileen smiling down at me, her expression serene. "Soothing, isn't it, love? The water has always been a favorite place of mine." Drawing closer, she gives me a knowing look. "My parents had a farm just off the northern coast of Ireland, right along the cliff face. I used to go out and watch the sea, especially when my mind was in turmoil."
I lower my lids, nodding in agreement as her words resonate with me. "You know, fate has a funny way of working," Eileen continues. "Not everything we think and see is the truth. Sometimes it's when you keep walking that you stumble across what is real."
I blink open my eyes, realizing that Eileen is now sitting cross-legged next to me, her focus fixed on the water ahead. "When I was a girl, I dreamt of grand things, Erin," she says, pausing before continuing with a sad smile. "Girls always do. But tradition and rules often hinder us from reaching our full potential."
"Why do I feel like you're speaking in riddles?" I ask, a slight groan escaping me, which makes her chuckle.
Eileen pats my leg, her blue eyes still locked on the lake. She sighs, "I believe you understand my riddles perfectly well, lass. Siobhan and I see the way he looks at you."
"I..."
"No need to deny it, love. You're a very intriguing young lady. I've caught most of the men sneaking glances in your direction. It's natural for our wolves to be drawn to your flame."
Her words freeze me, and I go to speak, but she waves me off. "Aye, Erin, I've encountered your kind before. And I know our men can be drawn to that... to you."
"I don't want to cause..."
"Erin," Eileen interrupts gently. "You don't have to justify yourself to me. We women may seem a little strange to you, but I'm not as closed-minded as some."
"What should I do?"
Turning to face me, she smiles again, the warmth reaching her eyes. "If it were anyone other than Liam, I'd say, 'Feck them.' But he's our future Alpha, Erin, and we need him to be with a mate who can continue the line."
Her words, even though hard to hear, are accurate. I understand shifter dynamics and know I don't have the lady parts to take on an alpha.
I tighten my jaw, well aware that my emotions carry little weight, especially considering the binding contract with Alexie. Nonetheless, I summon my inner strength, shifting the conversation's course to seek answers. "I understand, but Eileen, give it to me straight. What's the Ranch's plan for Ava, and how can she sever the bond?"
Sighing, she redirects her gaze to the water. "The decision to break the bond rests entirely with Ava. Erin, you may not agree with how we've handled things, but we truly have Ava's best interests at heart."
"How does she break it?" I press, trying to fathom why it hasn't happened already.
Her expression shifts, genuine sadness filling her eyes. "The only way to break a bond is by the death of one of them."
I spring to my feet, my thoughts immediately turning to Isla and the implications of losing a family member. Surprised by the surge of anger within me, I demand, "What the heck, Eileen? Are you saying Ava has to have her... her captor, mate, or whatever you want to call him, killed before she can be free of a mating bond she doesn't understand?"
"Erin, calm down, lass. She'll be given the option when the time is right, and only then will his fate be determined."
"How can you justify that? Isn't he part of your community?" I spit, beginning to pace, my instinct to shield Isla taking precedence in my thoughts, especially considering he is her brother. "I mean, what the Hell?"
"Erin, it's what he wants."
"Wait! What?"
Rising to join me, her eyes still tinged with sadness, she directs her gaze toward the ranch, where we both know Isla is seated. "My son, Shay, he and Griffin, they're close. Practially brothers." Wrapping her arms around herself, she offers me another pained, crooked smile. "You must perceive us as monsters. Well, some of us might fit that description," my thoughts immediately drift to Caitlín and her offspring Roisin. Chuckling as if she senses my thoughts, she adds, her tone subdued, "Griffin won't be able to endure her rejection. His wolf, according to what Shay has shared with me, has endured too much."
Seeing my eyebrow raised, she continues, "Siobhan and I don't know the details, love. What she said was true, but after what we witnessed with Lorcan's death, we can only imagine the level of torture he experienced."
"So, you're telling me, if Ava chooses to reject him, Griffin will just roll over and allow you to what, kill him?"
"Aye, well, he'll only let Shay do the deed. But yes, Erin, it's his wish."
"We have to tell her!" My voice comes out as a shout. Ava would prefer to pluck her own eyes out than be responsible for another person's death.
"We can't, Erin. She's not ready for that, and I ask you to give her time. Time to get to know her mate before she understands what's required."
"And how is she supposed to get to know him? It's not as if your family is inviting him around for a coffee and a chat," I deadpan.
"Griffin isn't in control of his wolf right now. We need him to be calm before that can happen, and as you well know from what occurred earlier today, that will take a little time and a little intervention."
Nibbling on my lower lip, my hands sliding up and down my sweatshirt to stave off the evening chill, I nod reluctantly. "Alright, but promise me you won't attempt to influence her toward either decision."
"I can assure you, Erin, that no one, including Liam, will force their opinions on her. The decision will be hers and hers alone." Glancing towards the Ranch she sighs and mutters softly to herself, her words audible. "He's a good boy. She just needs time to see it."
My heart softens a bit as I grasp the sacrifices her mate is willing to make for her.
Feeling shattered by the potential consequences for Isla, I resolve to discuss it with Alexei. If the situation deteriorates, I'll bring her back to the city with us. He owes me that much.
"Let's head inside, love. It's getting cold out here, and Ava should be waking soon."
***************************************************
Ava's revelation about Liam and Isla's connection hit hard. We stick together for the day and into the evening, and I'm silently fuming. The fact that Liam was supposed to be with Isla make my feel sick. How could I get this so wrong? The guy is practically engaged, and that's a whole new level of ick.
Taking a moment to breathe, I remind myself that I'm far from saintly, but this still stings.
Shaking off the heavier thoughts, I join in with Ava and Isla, laughing at our silly spoon games and their secret hand signals—something Ava's therapist encouraged. Not my cup of tea, delving into mind stuff, but it works for them.
Just as Isla is led away and I'm about to follow Ava and Siobhan into the Den, my phone vibrates in my pocket. Pulling it out, my heart sinks when I see Alexei's name flashing on the screen. Knowing he won't stop until I pick up, I curse under my breath and turn to Ava, my voice heavy with regret. "Ava, I'm so sorry. I gotta take this, babe. Will you be okay without me?"
She gives me a small, understanding smile and nods. It kills me that I can't be there to support her with whatever's going on in the Den. As they head towards the door, I spin around and quickly make my way to the staircase, answering the phone just as it rings for the fifth time. "Alexei."
"Hello мой маленький спитфайр. Do you have something to tell me?" His smooth voice comes over the line. I shudder.
"Let me guess. You have eyes here too?"
There's silence on the other end of the line; I can tell he's pissed. "Pack your bags, мой маленький спитфайр. I expect you in my apartment within the next 4 hours."
Heading to my room and shutting the door behind me, my heart rate increases. "Alexei, I need more time. I—"
"Enough, Erin," he growls, his voice taking on an unearthly tone. "4 hours. You know what will happen if you're late. You're already in enough trouble. Do. Not. Make your punishment any worse than it already is."
"Alexei, I—"
The phone goes dead. DAMN, DAMN, DAMN...
My tears start to flow as I realize I have no alternative but to leave. We had a deal, and I've broken it. Now I need to confront the consequences. Dejectedly, I begin to move around the room, aware I have limited time to pack what I need before departing, and hoping I have enough time to speak with Ava before I go.
Closing my suitcase, I decide to call Alexei back, hoping he'll grant me a bit more time to at least bid farewell. He answers on the first ring. "You better be getting into your car, мой маленький спитфайр."
"Alexei, I know I messed up, and I understand the consequences, but I'm begging you, please give me a little more time to say goodbye to Ava."
"You now have 3 hours and 45 minutes, Erin. Don't make it any harder on yourself."
"I just need more time."
"I've been lenient enough, Erin. The time stands firm."
Attempting to soften my tone, though I doubt it'll sway him, I ask again, "Please, I know you've been lenient, but I'm needed here."
"No."
"Please."
The line goes dead again. Damn it. I throw my phone against the wall and curse out loud. Turning, I freeze when I see Ava staring at me. Retrieving my phone from the wall, which thankfully remains intact, I look back up at her. "Work," I lie.
I can tell she doesn't buy it, but she still offers me a small smile. "You need to leave?"
"Yeah. Ava, I'm so sorry I—"
"Don't apologize," she interrupts, walking over and pulling me into a massive hug. "When do you need to leave?" She whispers.
"Now, unfortunately. I have a few things I need to fix," I reply, my eyes stinging with unshed tears.
Pulling back, Ava looks at me, her eyes soft. "Ava," I murmur, "I don't know when I can come back. I'm so sorry, babe."
Pushing back the loose strands of my hair, she smiles again. "It's okay. You've done more than enough." Pulling me in for another hug, she holds me tight. "Just call me when you get home to let me know you're okay."
Sniffling, I hold her tighter. "You too, bitch." Blinking back tears, I let her go and step away. Wiping my eyes with the back of my hand, I sniffle again. "Wanna walk me out?"
Ava helps me lug my bags out to the car, parked just off to the side. We pop the trunk and load it up. Before closing it, we share one last tight hug. I jump into the driver's seat, turning on the ignition. "Stay safe," I say, voice cracking as I let the tears flow. I close the door but roll down the window. "Take care of Isla for me, will you?" The weight of leaving her behind gnaws at me.
With the car in drive, I keep my foot on the brake for just a moment longer. I remember my chat with Eileen. "Ava, I think there's more to Griffin and the bond. Keep an open mind, yeah?" Ava nods in agreement.
I rev the engine and tear off, driving like I'm on a mission from God. I have to make it to Alexei's, and fast.
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