Light Me Up

10: Halloween

A week has gone by and not once has Alex showed up at lunch.

Another week passes and he won't even look at me.

I don't know why I miss him, but I do. I try to remember--and cling to--what made me think I didn't like him, but I can't. These two weeks he's spent avoiding me, are the two weeks my conscience has been eating at my sanity. We occasionally meet each other's stares that aren't meant to be caught, and they turn into long lingering glances you can't tear your eyes away from. Alex's absence has only seemed to heighten Danny's mood, and he's been a really good friend to me. Without AJ in school, I rarely find the time to talk to him, and the distance between us is only adding to the list of problems that keep me awake at night.

Halloween has come so fast this year, and I am plan-less and costume-less just like last year. So much for my favorite holiday. The chill in the air was supposed to vanish into sunshine by midday, and the girls prancing around school in their skanky halloween costumes did little to alleviate the black clouds hovering over my parade.

"Please say you have something for us to do tonight," I beg Danny, somewhat hopeful as I close my locker at the end of the day.

The smile on his face is my answer, but he tells me anyway, "Mike DiRusso's tonight. He's supposed to be having some huge party, told me to come by. At least the good people remember me."

I laugh, smiling what feels like the first real smile in two weeks, "YAY!"

"Unless you want to skip the party and smoke at my place..."

"We can do that too!" I grin. "We've got all night to do whatever we want."

"Oh the beauty of Halloween on Fridays," Danny sighs, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. We walk outside, avoiding Alex when I see him out of the corner of my eye. I know he's with someone else, but I didn't have time to look at both of them before realizing I had to look away. When I got on the bus, I gladly told Kaylee about our new plans for tonight. Instead of our fatass plans for making brownies, eating popcorn and watching scary movies, I told her we were going to a party. Her face turned sour.

"What?" I exclaim.

She shrugs, "I don't really feel like going to a party..."

My jaw drops, "You're kidding right?"

"Can't we just stay home like we said?"

"No way, man!" I say. "You don't have to come, but I'm going out tonight. You can stay home and hand out halloween candy with Mom if you really want to."

"I'll think about it," she says.

"Yeah, while we go get halloween costumes," I smile obnoxiously wide at her.

"Seriously, Ry?" she groans.

"Yeah, seriously. See, this is why I have Danny. You never want to do anything fun!"

"I just was already set on going home and doing nothing, Ryley," Kaylee rolls her eyes.

"Whatever," I turn to Danny, turning my smile back on. "Do you want to come to the mall with me to get a costume?"

"Sure. We're walking?"

"Unless you know somebody," I shiver, already thinking about how cold the walk there is going to be. Danny's looking back by where Kaylee is sitting.

"Brian," Danny starts, and I see his brother's head snap up from his phone. "Can you drop Ryley and I off at the mall?"

"Sure, if Mom lets me take her car."

"Today just keeps getting better," I sigh, making Danny laugh.

"I don't think I've ever seen you so happy," he chuckles, smiling at me.