Chasing Air // Billie Eilish

Chapter 5

ELLIOT'S P.O.V

"I don't feel like doing this right now, Jer." I pulled his arms off of me with a sigh.

"Please?" I shook my head, walking into the kitchen and leaning on the counter. "Come on, babe. Help me out."

"No. Stop. It's not up for debate. I'm not in the mood." I looked up at him to see if he was even listening.

He placed his hands on either side of me, trapping me against the counter and kissing my neck. "Just real quick?" He grabbed my hand and placed it on his stomach.

"I said no!" I said forcefully, hoping he'd just leave me alone.

"Don't raise your voice at me!" He slammed his hand down on the counter and I jumped. He yelled and got a little aggressive sometimes, but he had never hit me or anything. He just had anger issues. That was all. He would never hit me though, I was sure of it. That's why I didn't let him scare me too bad.

"Can we at least hit up Daniel's party?"

"Fine," I replied defeatedly. I already wouldn't have sex with him. There was no need to piss him off more.

-

"You look hot," he said calmly as we got out of the car. That was his way of saying sorry. He would never actually apologize for anything but he had his own way of telling me that he was sorry.

"Thanks." I crossed my arms, quickening my pace. I was still kind of mad at him for getting mad at me.

"Hey," Daniel said as I brushed past him, going straight into the kitchen and grabbing a beer. I didn't want to talk to him. I didn't want to talk to anybody except maybe Claudia. She made me happy. Her life was just so put together. It kind of made me feel worse about myself, but she was somebody that I actually enjoyed talking to. Her boyfriend and his sister didn't like me though. Especially her boyfriend's sister, Billie. She really didn't like me and it was very obvious. I kind of liked it though. I enjoyed talking to her and I kind of liked that she didn't like me. It made all of our interactions interesting.

I chugged down the rest of the beer and set the empty bottle on the counter. Leaning against the wall, I glanced around the living room. Jeremiah was sitting on the couch next to some girl. I didn't know her. It was making me a little uncomfortable but if I said something, he'd just call me clingy and annoying. I trusted him. It would be fine. We both did the occasional flirting with other people but it never got physical.

But they were laughing together. And they were sitting rather close. And she was biting her lip as he whispered in her ear. And I was supposed to trust him, but this didn't seem right. I sat beside him on the couch and kissed him on the cheek, hoping the girl would leave. She did. Perfect.

"I'm gonna go outside and smoke real quick, okay?" He pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. Not perfect.

"I'll come." I started to stand up but he pushed me back down.

"I need to talk to Jason. Stay here."

"Oh. Okay." I sighed as he walked into the backyard. I waited on the couch, evading small talk for ten minutes until I decided that it had been long enough and went to look for him. It was relatively empty in the backyard but I still noticed Jeremiah in the corner, and as I got closer, I noticed the girl on the other side of him. The same one from inside but now they were doing much more than laughing together. His lips were on her neck, and his hand was on her butt, and her eyes were closed, and her hand was tangled in his hair, and that hurt. My throat burned and my chest tightened as I stared at the awkward sight.