Twenty

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ASHTON
Monday, 2nd January

I sat with my head on my desk as I slept. The bell rang, causing me to jump and sit up straight. I slept over lunch when I was supposed to be marking. "Shit," I muttered.

My class filed in, taking their seats. I looked up just in time to see Lauren walking through the door. My heart stopped; Calum had his arm around her. They were both laughing at something. Then I noticed the thing that broke me; his lips were dark an swollen whilst her neck was plastered in hickeys.

He kissed her sloppily on the forehead before they parted to take their seats. She glared at me as she slumped down into her seat, intentionally opening her legs and flashing her grey and purple lace thong at me; my favourite one.

We were in the middle of a class discussion about why Lydia should leave Jack to be with Sam (the book they were reading). It killed me to talk about this as it was such a familiar thing happening to us.

I said, "Stand up if you think Lydia should leave Jack?" Only Lauren stood up. I gulped, "and whys that?"

"I think that Jack said way too much," she smirked, "Sometimes relationships are better going slow-"

"Says you babe," Calum shouted from the back, causing the whole class to laugh.

I however, didn't laugh. I glared at Calum and yelled, "Not time for your input Hood."

"I think Jack should accept the fact that Lydia doesn't want to be with him. Maybe she needs something fun," she said.

I walked out from the back of my desk and sat against the front of it, leaving a mere metre between me and Lauren. "I think that they had a pretty fun relationship."

"I think it was too mainstream," she shrugged.

I snapped, "What's wrong with mainstream?"

"Maybe Lydia has had a normal, boring life so far and she just wants something fun," she almost yelled.

"Lydia should stop being selfish," I snapped, "Maybe she should appreciate what she has before she throws everything away."

"She probably thought that he didn't care enough to actually chase her when she told him to leave," she screamed.

A lot of confused glances were changed between all the pupils. Something inside of me snapped and I yelled, "Lydia is a stupid bitch. If she wanted him to stay then she should've just said."

"Mr Irwin," Michael appeared at the door.

"What?" I yelled. I calmed down and said, "Sorry, what is it?"

"Language," Michael chuckled before exiting again.

"Sorry class," I said.

--

The bell rang and everyone packed up. Calum called Lauren's name so she made her way towards him. I panicked and said, "Miss Deyes, wait behind." She rolled her eyes and sat on her desk.

The last person walked out and closed the door. I sat on my desk too so we were closer than before. I said, "Do you not think I was tempted to turn around and run back to you?"

"No," she bluntly said, "If you wanted to turn around so bad then why didn't you? Huh?"

"I just . . ." My voice trailed off. I needed to tread carefully as I was on thin ice. I said, "I thought that I needed to hear the words to know you meant it. Turns out, I was wrong. I regret leaving you so much."

"What does Lydia do?" She folded her arms across her chest. She looked almost fascinate by Lydia.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

She sighed, "Who does she choose, Ashton?"

"She chooses. . ." I decided to tell the truth, "She chooses Sam. She lives a happy life with Sam. I don't think that was the right decision though. I think that she should've stayed with Jack."

"And why's that?"

"Because," I tried to find the words to say. "Because Jack loves her. He loves her more than anything in the world; he might not be able to show it as much as he likes but he would do anything for her. Even though Jack has made his mistakes, I think Lydia should look past them and see that he does love her." I stood up and walked the whole one metre to her. I stood in between her legs as she sat on the desk. I ran my thumb along the side of her face as I cupped her face in one hand. "And deep down I know that Lydia loves him back."

She gently pushed me away and stood up. What does she want from me? I'm trying my best. She mumbled, "I don't know Ash. There's Calum too."

"What's going on between you two?" I asked.

"It's like a constant hookup without feelings or a proper relationship; just sex," she shrugged.

"But are you happy with him?" I gulped. I only half wanted to know the answer to this.

She shook her head and sighed, "Not half as much as I was with you."

I felt warm inside. I smiled and whispered, "I'm so so sorry Lauren. We lost a week's worth of precious time, we shouldn't lose anymore."

"What will I tell Calum?" She sighed.

"Just tell him you're not into the whole sex thing and you just want to be friends," I smiled. "So, are we okay?"

She smiled, "Yeah, we're okay."

I walked foreword and wrapped my arms around her waist as hers wrapped around my neck. I like the feeling of her body pressed to mine; it made me feel like we were invincible.

She smelled of her usual scent; perfume with a lovely fresh smell, her shampoo and conditioner. Her hair always smelt like strawberries.

I pulled away slightly before attaching our lips. It felt like forever since I last felt her lips moulded against mine. I slipped my tongue into her mouth; a feeling that I also missed. I pulled away but kept my forehead pressed to her's. I whispered, "don't forget that my feelings will never fade towards you."

She bit on her bottom lip as she looked me straight in the eye, as if she was holding back. She sighed and whispered, "I'm just going to say it . . . I love you Ashton Irwin."

An electric feeling shot through my veins as the words left her mouth. I smiled widely and pecked her lips quickly before whispering, "I love you too Lauren Deyes."

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